by Karen Woods
Mark loosened his black tie. He was sweating and wet patches were visible under his arms on his white shirt. Taking a few seconds, he checked nobody was listening. “Yeah, he’s in here, but don’t ask me anything else. He’s on the other side of the jail. He’s nothing to do with me. I just make sure his files are in order and all that.”
Mikey smirked and his eyes lit up. “Well, fuck a duck. Me and my pa serving a sentence in the same nick. Can you get a message to him? Just tell him I’ve landed here and we could have a catch-up if he wants. Be nice to see what he’s been up to all these years, the old fucker.”
Mark’s eyes were bulging out from their sockets, he couldn’t look the inmate in the eye. “I can’t do anything like that. Listen, from what you told me about your childhood, you don’t need him in your life, he’s bad news. He walked away from you, remember, sometimes things are better left unsaid. I’d keep my distance if I were you.”
Mikey was on one. Who was this geezer to tell him when he could speak to his own father? There was no way he was keeping quiet, he was telling him straight. Fuck it, what did he have to lose anyway. “What’s the big problem here?” he ranted. “I’m only asking you to pass him a message, where’s the harm in that? I thought you was an alright screw and we could talk. Don’t be going snide on me now.”
Mark was backed into a corner and he knew this convict would end up giving him trouble if he didn’t get the answers he was looking for. Why the fuck had he ever let him talk him into this? He was in it now and for the first time in weeks, he couldn’t see a way out. It was always one more drop, one more parcel. Mikey stood and shoved his hands into his trouser pockets. He went nose to nose with Mark and looked him straight in the eyes. “The money will be there tonight. Just make sure you’ve got all I need. You’re no different than me, remember that. Just because you wear a uniform it doesn’t make you untouchable.”
Mark wasn’t sure what he was hearing, was this a threat? His ears pinned back and his chest was rising frantically. There was no way he was being blackmailed. He’d sort this inmate out if he was playing that card with him. No fucking way was he the underdog. No one was holding him to ransom, especially a fucking know-it-all prisoner. His voice was firm and he meant every word spoken. “This is the last time, the last parcel. Once it’s done that’s me out. Don’t ever think you can use this against me because let me tell you something for nothing lad. I’ve shit bigger than you and I’ll make sure you never speak again if you push my buttons.”
Mikey didn’t flinch. He was cocky, he knew he was the one in control here, not this bent bastard. Mark was up to his eyeballs in it and if he thought he was bailing or ever getting out of this situation he had another think coming. Mikey edged closer to the door and gripped the handle tightly. As he turned back he kept a serious expression. “Listen, you bellend. I’m only asking for you to contact him, not to climb a fucking mountain. Take your head from out of your arse and sort it out will you?”
Mark rushed towards him and pushed his hand into the small of his back urging him out of the door. “I’ll see what I can do. Fuck off now before someone gets onto you.” Mikey bounced out from the office and never looked back. Mark slammed the door shut and stood behind it for a few seconds. This wasn’t good, it wasn’t good at all. Things needed sorting and fast.
*
Brendan Mellor was on the landing playing cards with a few other inmates. As Mikey strolled by he lifted his head slowly. His teeth ground together and his grip on the playing cards tightened. Mikey smirked over at him on his way past. “Alright there Brendan, are you doing a session down the gym later?”
Brendan looked at the other inmates who were sat with him and chuckled. “Have you heard this clown, lads? He’s sold me out for a daft specky prick and he thinks he can still chill with me. Do one, you dick. I’m nobody’s mug.”
Mikey spun around on the spot. Brendan was dicing with death and the mood he was in, he would have floored him with one blow. There was whispering among the others who sat there. The prisoners sat back in their seats and waited for his response. Mikey’s eyes closed and he licked his lips slowly, his fists starting to curl into two tight balls at the side of him and he was game to knock this cunt out.
Smithy came onto the wing just in time and he was shouting names out for the visits. “Come on lads, get your shit together, your loved ones are waiting for you. Get that sack and crack scrubbed, you never know you might get a feel of some pussy if you’re lucky.” Smithy was happy today and enjoying the banter on the landing. Mikey was still eyeballing Brendan and for a split second he didn’t know if he was going to bang him out or not. Smithy came to Mikey’s side and patted the top of his shoulder. “Come on Milne, you’re on a visit today. Go and have a quick swill and line up to go over to the main block.” Brendan was already up out of his seat and heading back to his pad to get ready. Mikey watched him from the corner of his eye and took a few steps forward. There was no way he was letting him get away with that, not a fucking chance on this earth. Who did the ginger tosser think he was trying to put him down like that in front of people? If he didn’t sort this out now his status would be in jeopardy, no, this had to get nipped in the bud. Mikey quickened his step towards his pad, he was vigilant and made sure there were no screws about. Potter greeted him with a smile as he walked inside his pad. “I’m on a visit too Mikey. My sister and mother are coming to see me today, they said they have some good news in the letter.” Mikey was quiet, he dragged a sock from his washing pile and walked over to the side of the table. Two tins of tuna were rammed deep into the grey sock and a knot was tied over the top of them. Shoving the weapon inside his jacket, he casually walked out from his cell, completely ignoring Potter.
Brendan was washing his face in the steel basin. He needed a shave really but time wasn’t on his side and the bum fluff had to wait. Lifting his head up slowly, he saw a shadow meet the mirror. Soap had gone into his eyes so he couldn’t see clearly, his eyes were starting to sting. Turning his head to the side with both his eyes watering, he was blinded as he searched for a towel at the side of him. A hand gripped the grey towel and rammed it hard into his chest, taking his breath away. Brendan was struggling to see and his legs were unsteady, he stumbled and fell onto the bed. Mikey just stood over him snarling. Brendan could see him now. “What the fuck are you doing here, go on, do one back up your own arse buddy.” It was too much, he’d overstepped the mark. If he would have kept his mouth shut Mikey might have given him a talking to, but he’d done it now, he was fucked. Mikey dragged his weapon out from his jacket and flung the sock over his shoulder. It had power behind it now, this was going to hurt. Mikey’s nostrils flared and without thinking, he steamed into Brendan. The sock crashed against bones, blood splurging onto the walls, this was way over the top. This was a savage attack. This kid had only given him a bit of back chat, there was no need for this. He was taking liberties, he was killing him. Brendan’s head was pushed deep into his pillow and any calls for help went unheard. When he had finished, Mikey stood over his victim, his eyes dancing with madness. He was in the zone now and anything could have happened. His temper was boiling and there was no coming back once he’d started. He whacked the tins over Brendan’s body and his own face was covered in small speckles of bright red claret. There was talking outside, Mikey froze, he stood back and wiped the back of his hand swiftly across his forehead. His heart was racing and small balls of sweat ran down the side of his cheek. “You’re a rat. I don’t give a fuck how long we’ve known each other, don’t ever think you can mug me off in front of people.” He spat onto his victim’s face and stormed out of the pad. Brendan was in a bad way and his eyes were swelling with every second that passed, bright purple bruises. This lad was choking, he was turning blue as he tried to sit up, spluttering blood.
Back in his pad, Mikey plonked down on his bed and threw the sock over at Potter. “Sort that out for me, get rid of it.”
Potter was flustered, he shot a look
at Mikey’s hand and could see there was damage, dried blood, small gashes on his knuckles. Standing up from the bed, he took hold of the sock and made sure there would be no evidence in the room that would associate his pad mate with any assault. Mikey lay on his bed staring into space, his chest was rising frantically and he was finding it hard to calm down. He touched every finger with his thumb slowly, he was counting. This action was what he’d learned in an anger management class when he was much younger. It was working now, he was starting to calm down, his breathing returned to normal. Potter stood over Mikey, he was eager to speak. Something had gone down and he was scared to ask what. What if they were rushed though, taken by surprise, he needed to be ready, tooled up. “What’s up, has something happened?” Potter eyes creased and he was hoping he’d not rattled his cage while he was still angry. He could get a crack here if he wasn’t careful.
Mikey growled over at him. “Just some dickhead chatting shit, it’s nothing for you to worry about. There will be no comebacks, I’ve made sure of that. Stop flapping, you’re doing my head in.”
“Who was it, someone from the wing?” Potter asked anxiously.
“Brendan. He got what he deserved. I’m not arsed if he’s a mate or not, he’s a cock and I should have got rid of him years ago. The cheeky arrogant bastard.”
Potter nodded and clinched his fist tighter. He was behind Mikey one hundred and ten percent and if his pad mate said this lad deserved it, then who was he to question him? But Brendan was a long-term friend, someone he’d chilled with on the outside. Potter swallowed hard and at that point he realised that friendship meant fuck all inside these four walls. It was a dog-eat-dog environment. Nobody was safe.
*
Mikey sat on the table waiting for his visitor to come through the doors. He was tapping his fingers out of boredom, eyes flicking from side to side. Sarah was coming today and he was more than happy to see her big smile when he first made eye contact with her. As the doors opened, a stampede of eager visitors flew into the room. Here she was, her eyes desperate to find him. This poor girl had lost weight, her face looked thinner and her body frame wasn’t as full as he remembered it. He sprang up from his seat and opened his arms wide as she approached him. “I’ve missed you so much, come here and give me a kiss.” Their bodies connected and you could see in his eyes that he needed this. Mikey felt the love rush through his body, the butterflies and shortness of breath. This was someone who genuinely cared for him, someone who could lift his spirits, calm the rage bubbling inside. Even the way her hair smelled sent calming waves through his body, she was his love, his girl.
“Do you want a drink or shall I wait until the queue dies down?” Sarah asked.
Mikey was still staring at her and his mind was on kissing her, nothing else. He stretched over the table and pulled her closer. This was what it was all about on a visit, the loving touches, the promises they would make to each other for when he was a free man. It was just jail talk though, nothing that could ever be taken seriously when a man was locked up behind bars. They said what they needed to, making sure they kept their loved ones happy. At the time they probably did mean to change but more often than not it was a load of crap. Words said in the heat of the moment. The blood rushed to Mikey’s throbbing member, the desire to have sex. The kiss was passionate and if they would have been left any longer he would have mounted her. Stuck one right up her.
“Enough of that Milne,” the screw shouted at the side of him. He walked over to the table and pulled Mikey away by his shoulder. The prisoner was blushing, cheeks beaming. His cock was hard and he was doing his best to control his urge to fuck her brains out. Sarah wasn’t like the girls he’d met in the past. The others were just bangs really, no loving time during sex, just a shag but his girlfriend was special. There was no way in this world she would have let him get away with just a quick bang. Every time these two made love it was like the first time; lights low, soft music playing, gentle touches. Sarah always wanted to be treated like a lady and it had taken him ages to even get a crunch from her. She struggled with oral sex and couldn’t see the point in it really. Mikey spoke to her about having a sixty-niner many a time but that also took ages for him to get her to agree. Even to this day she was still a bit prudish about having oral sex and never really let herself go when he was between her legs with his tongue. She was particular like that. Sometimes he hoped that she would feel at ease with him and let her inhibitions go but up to this day she was still shy.
Sarah blew a laboured breath and held his hand in hers. “My dad knows you are in here. The shit has hit the fan in our house, let me tell you. I told him straight. I said what kind of a man has his daughter’s boyfriend beaten within an inch of his life? He’s not spoken to me for days. It worries me when he’s quiet though, he’s up to something. Don’t ask me why, I just have a gut feeling.” Mikey was concentrating, he never flinched as she continued. “He’s banned me from coming to see you. He said you’re a crazy animal and I don’t know you properly. I mean, how can he say that when he’s not even spoken two words to you? He’s judging you when he doesn’t know shit.”
Mikey could see her eyes clouding over and patted her hand to reassure her. This girl really did have his back, she would fight anyone who blackened his name. “Sarah, I don’t have to prove to anyone what I’m about. All that counts is that you know me, nobody else. Fuck them, fuck them all.”
She held her tears back and bit hard on her bottom lip. “But he’s not even given you a chance. I’ve told him when you get out you want to find work and settle down but he’s having none of it. It’s so frustrating because he won’t listen.”
Mikey nodded and looked over at the queue on the other side of the room. “Will you get me a drink babes, a bar of chocolate too? I’m starving today I’ve hardly eaten a scrap.” Mikey watched her leave and shot his eyes around the visiting room. Mark was on duty and he could feel his presence, the bastard was all over him, watching his every move. What was his problem? Mikey sat twisting his fingers, he took a deep breath and knew he would have to shake this mood off. His blood was boiling and he still couldn’t rid himself of the anger he felt deep inside. It was hard to control, once it got a grip of him it would fuck with his head for days. Put him on a right downer. The anger issue he had started when he was in the care home. The workers there liked to refer to it as frustration, the hurt he felt about being away from his loved ones. What the fuck did they know about his life anyway? He was just a case number to them. Once their shift finished they didn’t give a flying fuck about anyone or anything. They had their own happy lives to go home to; a family unit, a stable life. The anger just tortured him inside, it was like a volcano ready to erupt and lately it was getting a lot worse. It was waking him up in the middle of the night and playing with his head, torturing his mind.
Taking a few seconds and long shallow breaths, he held his head back and looked up at the ceiling. Sarah was back now and he wanted to make the most of their time together. “How’s my mam? I spoke to her last night and she seemed okay. Happy even.”
“That’s all my doing that is. I told her how important family was and suggested she made friends with your nana.” Mikey held his head to the side. Surely he’d heard this wrong. He asked her again and this time he made sure he was listening properly. “Yeah, she’s been around a few times now. It’s like she’s never been away. Your Auntie Cath was there too with her husband. A lovely family get-together.”
Mikey thought deeply before he spoke. This was a turn up for the books and he was struggling getting his head around it. “I’m happy for her you know. Even though she’d deny it, she’s missed them all. Shit happens and I’m glad it’s all been finally put to bed once and for all.
Perhaps now she will look at things more clearly.” Sarah was giddy and she started to tell him about Rachel and her new outlook on life.
Mikey was sniggering and covered his mouth with his hand. He was cute when he smiled, his cheeks creased and the la
ughter came from the bottom of his stomach. He carried on talking. It was time to get to the nitty-gritty now. “Has she sorted my money out yet?”
Sarah sat back and folded her arms tightly in front of her. Why did he have to go and ruin things when they were getting on just fine? It was like a dark cloud had appeared right over their table. “She’s been looking for Gary but up to now he’s nowhere to be seen. Anyway, money isn’t everything is it? And I’ve been thinking that when you get out you can start to find work. I’ll help you, someone will see all the good things you have to offer.”
Mikey swallowed hard. In fairness, his girlfriend could see no wrong in her eyes but to ask so much of him was starting to scare him. Grafting was the only way he knew how to survive; crime, hooky deals and robberies. A proper job could never give him the life he wanted. Things cost money and he could never be one of those men working shit hours for shit money. But as he looked into her eyes, he knew he could never hurt her like that. It would break her heart. She didn’t ask for much and the least he could do was to offer her some kind of answer. “I know babe, but that money was for us and our future. I’m not letting it go, fuck that, the guy owes me dough.”
Sarah knew she was pissing in the wind. She wasn’t getting into this now, what was the point?
He had years left to serve and she would cross that bridge when she came to it.
*
Mark paced the floor and he was on the ball today, nothing was going to get past him, not on his watch anyway. Ok, he was bent, but that was stopping soon and he wanted to remain vigilant on the visits. Smithy was off today and already he was missing his wingman. Usually they worked together and they could spot a parcel being passed a mile away. Mikey tried to ignore the screw and carried on talking to Sarah. “So my mam has finally sorted herself out then?”