He wrapped an arm around me, solid as stone. “We’ll let the death dragon do it.”
I laughed and straightened up. “Okay. So this kiss…”
He nodded towards his truck. “I will claim your kiss in the back. We will have to go somewhere else. Somewhere between worlds.”
“Between worlds?”
He nodded soberly. “It’s a very humid place. It rusts my engine if I run along those roads too often.”
“Sounds dangerous.”
He gave me a smile that was the definition of dangerous, but I only felt like he’d protect me from the rest of the wolves.
I glanced at him a few times as I climbed into the truck. I loved Drake, helplessly and idiotically, but Signore wanted to kiss me. It was like Pitch coming to Zach and being all, ‘let’s make out!’ or something. Surreal. Also, he said it would hurt. I should be worried, but pain wasn’t a big deal. Maybe it would be like kissing a rock. That made sense.
I sat in the passenger’s seat as we drove out of Rosewood, down the road and then shifted into a different world that was all smoky mist in shades of green. Signore’s headlights illuminated a road, two ruts through dead-looking grasses.
When I inhaled it was like trying to breathe through a layer of water on my face.
“Very humid,” I said.
He gave me a slight smile before he continued until he pulled off the road beneath the broad branches of a tree.
“So, this isn’t Darkside?”
“No. I would never take you there. Shall we?” He stood and gestured into the back. My palms were clammy and my stomach tangled into knots. I shouldn’t be kissing Signore, even if Drake refused to marry me. I straightened my spine. Why not? He’d kissed all those girls recovering from my protection spell. This was something like a kiss to break a curse or something experimental.
In the back of his truck, I walked over to the couch, but Signore continued to the very back where a black curtain fluttered that I’d never seen before. In fact, I was pretty sure that part of his truck hadn’t existed before now.
He looked at me for a long moment before he smiled sadly and drew the curtains back. The smell hit me first, putrid, rotting, dead body stink. Also urine and vomit.
I started breathing through my mouth.
“This is my brother.”
I stared at Signore then at the creature shackled behind the mesh bars that kept his body completely immobile. His eyes opened and the pale yellow was a nice, creepy color. He hissed and spit speckled my super cute plaid skirt.
“Hi, I’m Penny.”
He lunged towards me, but nothing really happened except for more spit. I took a few steps away from him to get out of range, but Signore put his hand on my elbow and led me back.
“The kiss. Please, go ahead.”
I stared at him, then at the monster then back at Signore. “You want my kiss for your brother? How disappointing. I should have known you wouldn’t actually want to kiss me. I am too stupid. Right. Let’s get on with it, then.”
I walked over to the monster, grabbed his ripped clothing through the mesh and kissed him as hard as I could.
His teeth were sharp. My lips and tongue were ripped and torn until the taste of blood drowned out the taste of rotting. I kissed him anyway. If Signore wanted me to kiss a monster, I’d kiss a monster. I’d kiss a hundred. That’s just the kind of imbecile I was.
I kissed him harder, pressing my teeth into his lips, not quite stone, but not quite human flesh. The taste grew stronger as his mouth parted against mine. Some part of him had realized that we were kissing instead of eating. Convenient, because I was missing bits of my tongue. I didn’t even like kissing with tongue. So gross. Particularly Signore’s brother’s tongue but I only gripped him tighter and kissed him deeper. The more I hated it, the more I drew out of him, pressed into him, until his lips became soft and gentle against mine.
I slid my hands up, over his face to the tufts of hair pressing through the iron mesh that bound him. I kissed him until he ended the kiss, pressing his lips together and pulling away as far as he could while he was held immobile.
I went down fast. Signore caught me before my face slammed against the black metal floor. He swung me up and carried me to the couch, setting me carefully down before running his fingers over my ripped and swollen mouth.
He frowned before he absently put his fingers to his lips, fingers red with my blood. “Cara Mia, your blood is sweet.”
“You should have taken the kiss. It was amazing, because that’s the kind of kisser I am.” I’d meant to say that, but it came out more slurred and blurred because my tongue wasn’t really all there anymore, and neither were my lips.
He smiled slightly before he went to the bar and poured me a drink. The drink mostly went down my shirt which was fine because I was going to burn that entire outfit the second I got out of this revolting mess. Stupid Penny. Only princesses got to kiss princes. Witches got monsters and frogs that stayed frogs. Everybody knew that.
I started shuddering and convulsing, like after a tourney. Fun. Throwing up was even more fun. Signore stayed with me, petting my hair and cleaning up my mess, running his fingers over my mouth every once in awhile.
“What a lovely, dulcet delight you’ve given me. It couldn’t have been done better, brother.” The voice was dark and rumbling, like Signore with a hint of honey drizzled over it.
I looked past Signore’s shoulder and saw the monster, but his eyes were focused and his expression almost human. If you hosed him down for a few days, he’d probably smell passable.
I winced at the taste still in my mouth. It would never go away. I would never kiss a mage again, particularly Darksiders. Particularly Signore’s relatives. He was seriously testing my loyalty. He murmured a few words in Darksider as he pressed his thumb against my forehead. My lips started feeling a little bit less numb, more screaming. Nice.
He got up and turned towards his brother. He threw his arms wide. “Brother. It’s been decades. You were lost and now you are found.”
Signore’s brother laughed, a light sound coming from so much yuck. “Not so much found as retrieved.” His eyes shifted to me, the pale yellow clear like a moon shining through deepest darkness, not nearly as gross but still disturbing. “My thanks fair Madame.”
I didn’t smile because that took things like mouths. He kept his eyes on me as Signore walked up to him, gripped his face with one hand and then shoved his other hand deep into his chest cavity and pulled out a beating heart.
I’m not even kidding, this pink, slimy thing twitched in Signore’s hand while blood went absolutely everywhere. I was burning my shoes too.
I sat up and went all dizzy because that kiss had taken a lot out of me. Or I’d taken a lot out of Signore’s brother. Pain. Madness. Despair. Yeah, I’d kissed him sane. Because Signore preferred to murder sane people than crazy ones.
I was doubting Signore’s sanity when he started eating the heart. Yep. Totally nutso. Someone started laughing hysterically. Was that me? It was. I had to get out of there before Signore ripped out my heart. At least Drake hadn’t done that to me literally. And eaten it. Although maybe that would be sweet if Drake did it. It was not sweet to eat your brother’s heart. Was it? Things were getting so weird.
Then Signore started glowing. He glowed black. Revere did that sometimes. Which didn’t make sense except that he’d said I was seeing the energy not color. Signore walked over to me, his boots making prints in the thick blood underfoot until he reached me and put his bloody hand on the back of my neck and pulled me upright.
Energy. I felt like I’d gotten electrocuted in a bathtub. Not that I’d ever actually gotten electrocuted. I’d jumped out of the tub fast when Poppy wanted to see what would happen.
Everyone was mad. And now I had enough energy to stand up. Just kidding. I jumped and stumbled into Signore then off the bar and then back into Signore.
His hands slid around my waist and he held me tight. Energy. So m
uch energy. He trembled with it, so much more energy than anyone should have. It bled out of him and threaded out into the truck around and back into him and me, a circuit that was completely unnecessary. I had my own energy issues; I didn’t need Signore’s.
I couldn’t move though. Who can move when they’re being electrocuted, even if it’s not in a bathtub?
After an eternity in Signore’s arms, the kind of embrace I’d fantasized about a great deal but had never come remotely close to; he finally pulled away and the black glow dimmed to a slight shimmer when I looked at him from my peripheral vision.
I shoved away from him once I could. “What’s your problem? Why did you do that to me? If you’re going to murder someone, I’d rather not be the one who kisses him first. You kiss him and I rip out his heart and eat it next time. Got it?” I touched my mouth because it was completely back together. “How did you fix me? Did you break my protection spell?”
He brushed my cheek and I felt a buzz of energy. “I manipulated your energy. You fixed yourself. Convenient, isn’t it? You want to see your grandfather. Why?”
I took a step away from him. “You know him?”
“We are allies. We fight Sooth, your father. You remember?”
I held up two fingers. “Only a little.”
“You can’t go into Darkside to face him.” He took another step closer to me until I was backed against the couch. I whirled around him and grabbed the biggest bottle off the bar, holding it up threateningly.
He took the bottle out of my hand before I could quite register it along with a glass then poured himself a drink. “Excellent choice. Surprisingly, raw, beating hearts don’t go down very smoothly.”
I stared at him then sat suddenly on the metal floor. My teeth were aching and my ears rang. Signore sipped his drink and absently petted my head. Woof.
“You should have sent me to retrieve the contract from the Devil instead of Narcollo. He’s not a good mage to toy with. Not that I am, but we’re already entangled.”
“Entangled conveys some sense of mutual tangledness.” I smacked his shins because he was still petting me. Ow. He had such hard shins.
“Ah, Cara Mia, if it weren’t for you, I would be in a similar state as my brother is.”
“Dead?”
“Dead? Mad. Oh, you think I killed him.”
“You ripped out his heart and ate it. It was very clear. There’s blood all over the floor. I’m sitting in blood. Um. I’m going to be sick.”
He picked me up and carried me back to the couch, running his hands over me as though he could wipe off the blood. Apparently he could because I didn’t see or smell any red stickiness as he studied me, kneeling beside me so his knees would be soaked.
“Cara Mia, he has two hearts. He’s not dead.”
I stared at him, frowning as I leaned over until my forehead was touching his. “You have two hearts? But you have hardly any blood. You’re made out of mostly rocks. That was a lot of blood.”
“Do you dislike blood?”
What kind of question was that? “Signore, I really dislike favors. Remind me to never ask you for another favor ever, ever, ever. Also remind me to never kiss a mage again. Also to never go somewhere so humid. The blood is never going to dry. My clothes were really cute. The saliva was bad enough. It’s never going to come out. Never, never…”
Signore kissed me. It wasn’t the kind of kiss I’d ever had before. It tasted like rocks. Soft rocks. And energy. Not the electrical kind, the sleep kind. That made no sense, but instantly I slumped over onto the couch thinking about rusty hubcaps.
Chapter 11
Mage
Signore brought me an unconscious Penny and the news that she was going to dinner with the Devil of Darkside. He also told me that I should kiss her as a favor to him, which I’d used up with the information about the Devil in Darkside’s date with Penny.
I would have said something, possibly objected, but I couldn’t seem to do anything other than hold the witch he’d dumped into my arms. He was different. More buzzing, dangerous, deadly. And he’d just traded a kiss for information. That meant I had no choice but to kiss her. Why was he asking for those kinds of favors? I would have asked, but he turned and walked away, each step a clang of doom.
I took her to my bed, but I kept my shoes on. Nothing terribly interesting could happen if I kept my shoes on. I should call Zach, make him kiss Penny. For some reason, I couldn’t quite do it. She looked perfectly fine, but she was saturated with buzzing mage energy and she smelled like Darkside.
I lay beside her and stared at my ceiling considering the complexities of life. For a good thirty second I waxed philosophical before I buried my face in her hair and let my hands skim over her bare arms, knees, not much above the knee. I swear it. I held her too tight, but I couldn’t relax my grip, not for a very long time while she remained unconscious. I should get it together, but I was so very tired of not crushing Penny Lane.
One moment she was nestled against me, completely compliant, the next she straddled me holding a dagger at my throat. My dagger come to think of it. She gazed at me for a long time.
“Is this a dream?”
What would she do if I said yes? “I don’t think so, but I have so many dreams of you stealing my dagger and poking holes in me with it that I can’t be sure.”
She kissed me, still holding the edge of the knife at my throat. Did this count as me kissing Penny Lane? She tasted like Darkside plus a few more interesting flavors. Mostly like Penny. Ah.
I let her kiss me like a good little hostage until she tried to pull away and then I growled and gripped her, holding her tight while I kissed her until she parted her lips and then teeth until I tasted her sweet tongue.
She tried to pull away again and I rolled over on her. She bit me. Not hard enough. Her body was under me all sharp points and soft curves, lines and edges like a complicated puzzle that would take me a lifetime to unravel.
She kept struggling until I finally pulled away, green clouding my vision. She tossed my bloody dagger to the side and pressed her hands to my neck. She was going to heal me.
I rolled off my bed and onto the floor in the most graceful falling-off-the-bed known to mage. Bruised my tailbone, but I wasn’t about to let Penny steal another scar from me. I held my hand to my throat and stared at my witch.
Her lips were soft and wet, like she’d been kissed very recently and very well. Not well enough.
“Why am I in your bed?”
“Signore brought you to me. He seemed to think you’d like waking up here. You must have told him how desperately in love with me you are. Poor Penny, in love with the worst mage at school.”
She frowned and leaned over her knees. “Why won’t you let me heal you?” Her knees were so lovely and her skirt had slid quite high up her thighs. Not that I noticed. I was too busy sitting on the floor bleeding out. I needed her to leave so I could fix my throat without losing the scars.
“It’s my punishment for taking a knife to bed with me. I honestly expected you to use my shoes, not a knife.”
“What?”
“My shoes instead of…” I shook my head. What was I talking about? I’d left my shoes on but had forgotten all about my knife. Was it a good thing to take a knife to bed with Penny Lane so she’d hold me hostage and force me to kiss her? Come to think of it, definitely.
She got a little bit pale and green around the edges. “I wish you weren’t bleeding.”
“No? Squeamish?”
She nodded and then ran to my toilet. There was no door on my toilet, just the usual ceramic set with bidet next to my tub. Maybe I should invest in one of those. Doors. She threw up so much. And she was throwing up in the bidet. Such an uncultured witch.
I wanted to go over and hold her hair back or something involving touching her, but I did need to clean up my blood. I rolled it all off the bed and my and her clothes and back into my wound before I healed it, grabbing a paste from a cupboard and putting it on
thick to help save the scar, then wove a glamour over it so my neck looked pristine and perfect.
I ran a hand through my hair and walked over to Penny Lane. She was curled up in a ball, staring into space with a haunted look in her eyes.
“Is everything all right? No more blood.”
She grabbed my hand and tugged me down until I was squatting beside her. “Drake, I miss you doing my laundry.” She looked so sincere. The way she looked at me was so soft and vulnerable, so sweet and lovely. Was it an authentic look or part of her game? And what was her game? How was I supposed to play it if I didn’t know what it was?
“I miss folding your silk panties. There’s that blush. I miss that as well.” I bent forward and kissed her nose. “Do you want to tell me why you tasted like mad Darksiders?”
She winced. “Did I? I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have kissed you like that. Wait, you didn’t seem to mind.”
“I love kissing mad Darksiders. It’s what I do on the weekends when I’m not eating mages with Jello.”
She shook her head. “You are such a confused mage. You’re supposed to eat Jello with mages.”
“Jello has incredibly leathery skin. I have no idea how I could eat him.”
She winced again and put her face against my chest. “Don’t talk about eating mages.”
My heart pounded as I slid my hand through her hair. I carefully counted ears, fingers, but I couldn’t check her toes unless I took off her shoes. Tongue. If I recalled her kiss, which I did, she had a bit missing from the left side.
“Have you been eating mages, Penny? How shockingly Darksider of you. I hope it’s someone you like. It’s not civilized to eat people you don’t care for.”
She wrinkled her nose. “Oh. That makes no sense. No, I just watched Signore eat someone’s heart. It was…” She shuddered.
“Someone else’s?” I stared at her while she hesitated then nodded. “You kissed this person first?” My heart was starting to beat rapidly in my chest. Ah, the mystery of Signore Ludi was about to become clear. Terrifyingly, heart-stoppingly so.
Deadly Morsel: Rosewood Academy of Witches and Mages (Darkly Sweet Book 5) Page 9