She now went up to the barber, kissed his hand and burst into tears. When he asked her what was wrong, she said: ‘Look at my son standing there. He fell ill and exposed himself to the fresh air, as a result of which he has gone out of his mind. He used to be a donkey dealer and now, sitting, standing or walking, he keeps saying: “My donkey!” A doctor has told me that his mind is deranged and that the only cure is for two of his teeth to be pulled out and for his temples to be cauterized twice. Take this dinar and call out to him that you have his donkey.’ The barber said: ‘May I fast for a year if I don’t let him have his donkey right enough,’ and he then told one of his two craftsmen to go and heat two nails. As Dalila went off on her way, he called to the donkey man and told him when he came up: ‘Your donkey is with me. Come on, poor fellow, and take it, for I swear by my life that I’ll give it to you right enough.’ He took the man and brought him into a dark room where he proceeded to knock him down, after which his men dragged him off and tied his hands and feet. The barber then pulled out two of his teeth and cauterized his temples twice before leaving him.
The man got to his feet and asked the barber: ‘Why have you done this?’, to which he replied: ‘Your mother told me that you became deranged because you exposed yourself to the fresh air while you were ill, and that whatever you did you kept saying: “Where is my donkey?”, so I have now let you have a donkey.’ ‘May God punish you for having pulled out my teeth,’ the man said, but the barber replied: ‘This was what your mother told me,’ and he went on to repeat what Dalila had said. ‘May God bring her misery!’ exclaimed the man, and he and the barber left the shop and went off quarrelling. When the barber got back he discovered the place empty, as after he and the donkey man had gone, Dalila had returned and removed all its contents before going to tell her daughter everything that had happened to her and what she had done.
When the barber saw his shop empty, he laid hold of the donkey man and said: ‘Bring me your mother.’ ‘That wasn’t my mother,’ the man told him. ‘She is a trickster who has worked her wiles on many people and she has taken my donkey.’ At this point, up came the dyer, the Jew and Hasan, the young merchant. They saw the barber holding on to the donkey man, who had burn marks on his temples. When they asked him what had happened, he told them the full story, and the barber added his own version. ‘This old woman is a trickster and we too are victims of hers,’ they said, and when they had explained to the barber what had happened to them, he locked up his shop and went off with them to the house of the wali. ‘It is only through you that we can settle this matter and recover our goods,’ they told him. ‘And how many old women are there in the town?’ the wali repeated, before asking whether any of them knew her. ‘I do,’ said the donkey man, adding: ‘Give us ten of your men.’ He then went out with the wali’s men, followed by the others, and as he was going round with them he caught sight of Dalila coming towards him. He and the wali’s servants laid hands on her and took her back to the wali’s house, where they waited under the window for him to come out.
The men had been awake so long in their attendance on their master that they now fell asleep. Dalila pretended to be sleeping herself, and when the donkey man and his companions also dozed off, she slipped away from them and entered the wali’s harem, where she kissed the hand of its mistress and asked her where the wali was. ‘He is sleeping,’ the lady told her, and went on to ask what she wanted. Dalila said: ‘My husband is a slave dealer and he gave me five mamluks to sell while he went off on a journey. The wali met me and bought them for a thousand dinars, with a two-hundred-dinar commission for me. He told me to take them to his house and here they are with me.’
Morning now dawned and Shahrazad broke off from what she had been allowed to say. Then, when it was the seven hundred and fifth night, SHE CONTINUED:
I have heard, O fortunate king, that Dalila went to the wali’s harem and told his wife that the wali had bought the mamluks from her for a thousand dinars, with a two-hundred-dinar commission to be given to her, and had told her to bring them to his house. It happened that the wali had given his wife a thousand dinars to look after, saying that they would use the money to buy mamluks, and so, when she heard what Dalila said, she was sure that this was what he had done. So she asked where the mamluks were, and Dalila told her that they were asleep under the window of her mansion. The lady looked out and saw the barber, who was dressed like a mamluk, Hasan, who looked like a mamluk, and the dyer, the donkey man and the Jew, who were all clean-shaven like mamluks. ‘Each one of these,’ she said, ‘is worth more than a thousand dinars,’ and so she opened her money-box and gave Dalila the thousand dinars, telling her to go off for the moment, and that, when her husband woke up, she would get the extra two hundred for her. ‘A hundred of them will be for you to put under your drinking jar,’ said Dalila, ‘and the other hundred you can keep for me until I come back.’ She then asked to be let out through the postern door, after which she went back to her daughter, sheltered by God, the Shelterer. Zainab asked her what she had done, to which she replied: ‘I played a trick on the wali’s wife and got these thousand dinars from her by selling her the donkey man, the Jew, the dyer, the barber and the young merchant, making them out to be mamluks. But my greatest danger comes from the donkey man, for he knows me.’ ‘You’ve done enough, mother,’ Zainab said, ‘so sit back, as the pitcher cannot always avoid being cracked.’
As for the wali, when he woke up, his wife said: ‘I am glad for you about the five mamluks you bought from the old woman.’ ‘What mamluks?’ he asked. ‘Why try to hide it from me?’ she said. ‘God willing, they may become holders of offices like you.’ The wali swore that he had bought no mamluks, and asked who had told her that. ‘The old broker,’ she said, ‘from whom you bought them and to whom you promised a thousand dinars in payment, with two hundred as her commission.’ ‘Did you give her the money?’ he asked, and she said: ‘Yes, and I saw them with my own eyes. They were each wearing clothes worth a thousand dinars, so I sent out your officers to keep an eye on them.’ The wali went down and saw the Jew, the donkey man, the barber, the dyer and Hasan, the young merchant. He asked his men: ‘Where are the five mamluks whom we bought for a thousand dinars from the old woman?’ ‘There are no mamluks here,’ the men said, ‘but only these five who took hold of the old woman and arrested her. She must have slipped away into the harem while we were all asleep, as a slave girl came out and asked us if the five people whom the old woman had brought were with us, and we said yes.’ ‘By God,’ the wali swore, ‘this is the greatest swindle.’ The five were demanding that he get them back their property, but he said: ‘The old woman was your mistress and she sold you to me for a thousand dinars.’ ‘God’s law does not permit this,’ they objected, ‘for we are free men and cannot be sold. We shall take you before the caliph,’ but the wali insisted: ‘It was only thanks to you that she found her way here, and I shall sell you to the galleys for two hundred dinars each.’
While they were quarrelling, the emir Hasan returned from his journey to discover his wife stripped of her clothes. When she told him what had happened, he said: ‘It is the wali whom I blame,’ and, going to him, he said: ‘Do you allow old women to go round the town tricking people and taking their goods? This is your responsibility and it is from you that I shall look for the return of my wife’s belongings.’ He then asked the five victims for their stories, and when they had told him everything that had happened, he said: ‘You have been wronged,’ and he went on to ask the wali why he was holding them. ‘It was thanks to the five of them that the old woman found her way to my house, took my thousand dinars and sold them to my wife,’ the wali replied. ‘Emir Hasan,’ the five told him, ‘you are our representative in this case.’ At that, the wali said to the emir: ‘I shall take responsibility for your wife’s belongings, and I guarantee to deal with the old woman, but which of you can recognize her?’ They all said that they could and told him: ‘Send out ten of your men with us and we will arrest h
er.’
So the wali gave them ten men and the donkey man said: ‘Follow me, for I can recognize her by her blue eyes.’ Just then Dalila appeared, coming out of a lane, and they seized hold of her and took her to the wali’s house. When he saw her, he said: ‘Where are the goods of these people?’ to which she replied: ‘I didn’t take them, nor did I see them.’ The wali told the gaoler to keep her in his gaol until the next day, but he replied: ‘I shall not take her or lock her up lest she play some trick on me and I be held responsible for her.’ So the wali mounted and took Dalila with an escort out to the bank of the Tigris, where he ordered his executioner to hang her up by her hair. She was hoisted up by a pulley and ten men were left to guard her, after which the wali returned home.
It now became dark and the guards fell asleep. As it happened, there was a Bedouin who had heard someone saying to a friend: ‘Praise be to God for your safe return. Where have you been?’ The other told him: ‘I have been in Baghdad, where I breakfasted on honey doughnuts.’ ‘I shall have to go there and eat that,’ the Bedouin said to himself, for he had never seen honey doughnuts in his life and had never been to Baghdad. He mounted his horse and rode off, saying to himself: ‘Doughnuts are good to eat, and on my word as an Arab I am going to eat them with honey.’
Morning now dawned and Shahrazad broke off from what she had been allowed to say. Then, when it was the seven hundred and sixth night, SHE CONTINUED:
I have heard, O fortunate king, that the Bedouin mounted his horse and set off for Baghdad saying to himself: ‘Doughnuts are good to eat, and on my word as an Arab I am going to eat them with honey.’ As he came to where Dalila was hanging he was repeating this, and she heard what he was saying. He went up to her and said: ‘What are you?’ She said: ‘I am under your protection, shaikh of the Arabs.’ ‘May God protect you,’ he replied, and he went on to ask why she was being punished. ‘I have an enemy, an oil seller,’ she told him. ‘He fries doughnuts, but when I stopped to buy something from him, I happened to spit and my spittle fell on a doughnut. He brought a complaint against me to the governor, who ordered me to be hung up here and that, while I hang, I must be made to eat ten ratls’ weight of honey doughnuts. “If she eats them, release her,” he said, “and if not, leave her there” – but I cannot eat sweet things.’ ‘On my word as an Arab,’ the Bedouin said, ‘the only reason I have left my camping ground is to eat honey doughnuts, and I’ll eat them instead of you.’ ‘But no one can do that,’ she told him, ‘unless he is hung here in my place.’ She tricked him into releasing her and then hung him up where she had been, after first having taken off the clothes he was wearing. She put these on and rode off on his horse, with his turban on her head, to her daughter, Zainab. Zainab asked her about this and she said: ‘They hung me up,’ before telling her of her encounter with the Bedouin.
So much for her, but as for the guards, when one of them woke up, he roused the others and they found that day had broken. Then one of them looked up and called: ‘Dalila.’ The Bedouin replied: ‘By God, I don’t eat balila, so have you brought the honey doughnuts?’ ‘This is a Bedouin!’ the guards exclaimed, and one of them asked him: ‘Where is Dalila and who released her?’ He said: ‘I did it, since she shouldn’t be forced to eat honey doughnuts as she can’t digest them.’ They then realized that the Bedouin knew nothing about her and had been tricked by her. They discussed whether to flee or to meet whatever fate God had decreed for them, and while they were talking this over, up came the wali accompanied by Dalila’s victims. ‘Get up and release Dalila,’ he told the guards, and the Bedouin repeated: ‘I don’t eat balila, so have you brought the honey doughnuts?’ The wali looked up at the cross, where he saw the Bedouin hanging in place of Dalila. ‘What’s this?’ he asked the guards, and they replied: ‘Pardon, master.’ ‘Tell me what happened,’ he said, and they explained: ‘We had spent a sleepless time with you on the night watch and we said to ourselves: “Dalila is fixed to the cross,” so we dozed off. Then, when we woke, we found this Bedouin hanging there. We are at your mercy.’ ‘This was a trick,’ the wali said, ‘so may God pardon you.’
They released the Bedouin, who laid hold of the wali and told him that he would appeal to the caliph against him and that he would hold him responsible for the return of his horse and his clothes. On being asked, he told his story and the astonished wali said: ‘Why did you release her?’ ‘Because I didn’t know that she was a trickster,’ the Bedouin told him. The others then repeated that they held the wali responsible for their belongings, adding: ‘We handed her over to you and she was in your charge,’ and insisting that they would take their case against him to the caliph’s court.
The emir Hasan had gone to the court when the wali, the Bedouin and the other five arrived, saying: ‘We have been wronged.’ ‘Who has wronged you?’ asked the caliph, and each of them came forward and told his story, ending with the wali, who said: ‘Commander of the Faithful, the woman tricked me and sold these five men to me for a thousand dinars, although they were freeborn.’ ‘I shall ensure the return of all that you have lost,’ said the caliph, before going on to tell the wali: ‘I give you the task of producing the old woman.’ The wali, however, shook his head and said: ‘I can’t undertake to do that. I had suspended her on a cross, but she tricked this Bedouin into freeing her, hung him up in her place and went off with his horse and his clothes.’ ‘Should I give the job to someone else?’ the caliph asked, and the wali replied: ‘Give it to Ahmad al-Danaf. He gets a thousand dinars a month and has forty-one followers, each of whom draws a hundred dinars a month.’ So the caliph summoned Ahmad, and when he answered the summons the caliph told him to produce Dalila. ‘I guarantee to do that,’ Ahmad replied, and the caliph kept the five victims and the Bedouin in his palace.
Morning now dawned and Shahrazad broke off from what she had been allowed to say. Then, when it was the seven hundred and seventh night, SHE CONTINUED:
I have heard, O fortunate king, that when Ahmad was told to produce Dalila, he told the caliph that he guaranteed to do so.
Ahmad and his men went down to the hall saying to each other: ‘How are we to arrest her? How many old women are there in the town?’ One of them, ‘Ali Kitf al-Jamal, said to Ahmad: ‘Why should you consult Hasan Shuman? Is he so very good?’* Hasan said: ‘Why do you try to belittle me, ‘Ali? I swear by the Greatest Name of God that I am not going to help you in this business,’ after which he left in anger. Ahmad then said: ‘Boys, let each officer take ten men and go off, every one to a different quarter, to search for Dalila.’ Accordingly, ‘Ali took ten men and left, as did the other officers, and each band went in a different direction, having previously settled on the quarter and the lane in which they were to meet.
Word spread throughout the city that Ahmad al-Danaf had undertaken to arrest Dalila, the mistress of wiles. ‘If you’re really sharp,’ Zainab told her mother, ‘you will play a trick on Ahmad and his men.’ ‘The only one whom I fear,’ said Dalila, ‘is Hasan Shuman,’ to which Zainab replied: ‘I swear by my lovelock that I will get the clothes of all forty-one of them.’ She then got up, put on a dress and a veil and went to a perfume seller, who had a large room with two doors. She greeted him and gave him a dinar, telling him to take it in exchange for letting her use his room until evening. He gave her the keys and she went off and loaded carpets on the donkey her mother had taken from its owner. She spread these throughout the room and in every alcove she put a table with food and wine. She then stood at the door unveiled just as ‘Ali Kitf al-Jamal and his men happened to be coming along. She kissed his hand and, seeing that she was a pretty girl, he fell in love with her and asked her what she wanted. ‘Are you Ahmad al-Danaf?’ she asked. ‘No,’ he told her, ‘but I am one of his company and my name is ‘Ali Kitf al-Jamal.’ ‘Where are you going?’ she asked, and he told her: ‘We are going around looking for an old woman, a trickster, who has taken people’s goods and whom we want to arrest. But who are you and what is your business?’ Zaina
b said: ‘My father was a wine merchant in Mosul. He died, leaving me a large sum of money, and I have come here out of fear of the authorities. I asked people who would protect me, and they told me that only Ahmad al-Danaf could do that.’ ‘Ali promised that from then on she would be under the protection of Ahmad’s troop, and she said: ‘To set my mind at ease, take a bite to eat and a drink of water.’ When ‘Ali and his men agreed she took them into the room, where they ate and drank, but she drugged them with banj and stripped them of their clothes.
She played the same trick on the rest of Ahmad’s men, and when he came in his unsuccessful search for Dalila he could not find any of them but instead he saw the girl, who kissed his hand and at the sight of whom he fell in love. ‘Are you Captain Ahmad al-Danaf?’ she asked. ‘Yes,’ he replied, ‘and who are you?’ ‘I am a stranger from Mosul,’ she told him. ‘My father was a wine merchant there. He died, leaving me a large sum of money, and I have come here out of fear of the authorities. I have opened this wine shop and the wali has levied a tax on me, but I want to be under your protection, as you have a better right to the money that the wali takes.’ ‘Don’t give him anything,’ replied Ahmad, ‘and I shall make you welcome.’ She said: ‘In order to set my mind at ease, eat some of my food.’ Ahmad went in, ate and drank wine until he fell down drunk, when she drugged him and took his clothes. She then loaded everything on to the Bedouin’s horse and the stolen donkey, and left after reviving ‘Ali Kitf al-Jamal. When ‘Ali recovered consciousness, he found himself naked and he saw Ahmad al-Danaf and all his company lying there drugged. He used an antidote to revive them, and when this had taken effect and they had seen the state that they were in, Ahmad said: ‘What is this, boys? We were going around looking to catch the old woman, and this whore has caught us. How Hasan Shuman will crow over us! But we have to wait until darkness comes before we can go off.’
The Arabian Nights: Tales of 1,001 Nights: Volume 2 Page 104