“Then how did you call me?” She asks, signaling the bartender.
“I went out to the car.” I reply, like it's the most obvious answer ever. I didn't want it with me, tempting me to call Bentley more and more with every second that ticked by.
“Wow.” She says, shaking her head at me before turning her attention to the approaching bartender. Reaching out, she slides him a credit card and then signals between the two of us. “I got both.” She says, waiting until he nods before turning back to me.
“Lo.” I protest. “You don't have to pay for me.”
“I know I don't have to. I want to. I'm trying to make a point here. Do you see it?” She asks, pausing for a moment when the bartender re-approaches with her credit card and receipt. Scribbling her signature down on the paper, she slides it back towards him and then turns to me once more.
“People are allowed to do nice things for the people they care about. For example; a friend is someone who will show up in the middle of the evening and get hammered with you just because you need the company, and who will pay for you because it makes her feel good to do something for someone who has always been there for her.” She pauses. “You need to learn to let people do things for you, not because they want something but because they love you.”
“It's not the same.” I say, shaking my head at her.
“Come on.” She laughs, grabbing my keys from the bar and linking her arm with mine as she leads me outside. It isn't until we reach the warm evening air that the weight of the alcohol seems to take full effect. I feel like my movements are in slow motion and each step I take is harder than the last. By the time we finally make it to my car, I feel like I have just ran a marathon.
I hold my hand out to get my keys from Lo but she only laughs, unlocks my door and then drops them in her jeans pocket. “Not a chance. Now get your stuff and come on.”
“I can't just leave my car here.” I protest, knowing there is no way I can drive it either.
“You can and you will. My apartment is just a couple of blocks from here. We will walk back in the morning and pick it up.” She says, waiting for me to agree before pulling the door open to my car and gesturing for me to hurry up. “I'd like to get home before the sun sets if you don't mind.” She taps her heeled foot on the concrete.
Leaning down, careful not to take a face dive into my car, I quickly grab my purse, my phone and my bottle of water from the middle console, before pushing myself into a standing position and locking the door, slamming it closed behind me.
“Now what?” I ask, leaning against the rusted exterior of my car.
“Now, we go back to my apartment and you make a much needed phone call.” She laughs, once again linking her arm with mine.
We stumble around and laugh like crazy teenagers on the walk to Lo's apartment. By the time we finally arrive just a few minutes later, I am a panting, sweaty, drunk mess. It takes everything I have to make it across the small thousand square feet space, to collapse down onto the brown wrap around couch that takes up most of Lo's small living room.
“You need something?” She asks, making her way into the small open kitchen and pulling out two glasses from the cabinet.
“Water.” I croak, having drained the contents of my bottle on the walk over. Taking the glasses to the sink, she fills both with water before crossing the small space and handing me mine, taking a seat directly to my left.
“Where's your phone?” She asks, holding her hand out to me. Leaning forward, I sit my water on the coffee table in front of me and then proceed to fish my phone out of my purse, setting it in Lo's hand before I even think through what I am doing.
Clicking on the screen, Lo pushes a few buttons and then holds the phone to her ear. At first I think she is just using my phone to call someone, too drunk to really keep up on what's going on around me. But when I hear her say Bentley's name, my insides instantly freeze.
Turning my shocked gaze in her direction, she hits me with challenging eyes and continues talking into the phone. “It's Lo, Lauren.” She corrects. “I'm with Anna.” She says, laughing slightly. “Yep. Found her practically passed out on the bar. Drunk as can be.” She laughs. “Nope, I got her. She's gonna crash on my couch and then I will take her back to get her car in the morning.” She pauses, clearly listening to him speak on the other end.
“Oh my God this man is fucking hot.” She whispers, covering the phone so Bentley can't hear her. “Uh huh.” She says into the phone, laughing lightly at whatever he says.
I watch this go on for another good two minutes, all the while the knot in my stomach is growing tighter and tighter. I can feel the movement of the room around me, the walls closing down on me as the weight increases. Just when I feel like I am seconds away from losing my stomach all over Lo's floor, she pulls my attention to her, successfully distracting me from my twisted stomach.
“He wants to talk to you.” She says, holding the phone out to me. Shaking my head, I feel like a scared teenager too afraid to call the boy she likes. It feels stupid and juvenile but I can't stop myself from being just that.
“Anna Blake, take this phone now.” She hisses, covering the phone so he can't hear her hushed words. “Now.” She says, shoving the small device into my hand.
Looking at the screen, it takes a few seconds for me to realize that Bentley is on the other end, waiting to talk to me. Finally caving, I put the phone to my ear and take a deep breath. “Hey.” The word is weak and slightly slurred but at least it doesn't catch in my throat.
“Hey.” He says, the word so gentle it makes me want to curl up in a ball and cry my eyes out. Being so all over the place today and then having drank my weight in alcohol, I feel like I am seconds away from becoming a blubbering mess and for no reason really, other than being this intoxicated makes it hard for me to control anything.
“I'm sorry.” His next words catch me off guard. “I know I have no right to tell you what to do. It was unfair of me to say you couldn't stay in your own room because Andrea was having a guest over. I was being petty because I wanted to be the man sleeping in the same room as you.” He lets out a long sigh and I can feel the silent tears start to cascade down my cheeks.
“Me too.” I manage to get out through the tightness of my throat. “Bentley.” I say, feeling my eyes grow heavy as I rest my head against the back of the couch.
“Tell him.” Lo hisses next to me when I pause.
“What is it baby?” He asks, causing a smile to break across my face just as the blackness starts to take hold.
“I love you.” Is the last thing that leaves my lips before the alcohol coursing through my veins finally pulls me under.
Chapter Eight
“What did you do to me?” I whine out from my place on the couch as Lo hovers over me, bright eyed and smiling.
“Me? You were drunk by the time I got to the bar. Whatever you're feeling is on you.” She laughs, holding a cup of coffee out to me.
Pushing up on my elbows, I take the cup from her, taking a deep inhale of the amazing scent before setting it on the table in front of me and sitting the rest of the way up. The moment I am completely upright, the room spins slightly and my pounding head suddenly feels like it is being smashed in between two cinder blocks.
“Here.” Lo laughs at my obvious distress, reaching out to drop two pills into my hand. “That will help with the headache.”
“My God. Am I....” I break off and Lo laughs.
“Hungover? Yep.” She laughs again, seeing the way my face wrinkles in disgust.
“Why would anyone experience this and then go on to drink again?” I ask, rubbing my eyes with the back of my hands before popping the pills into my mouth and then retrieving my coffee to drink them down.
“You'd be surprised how quickly you forget.” She laughs again, plopping down next to me. “Can I just take this moment to say how incredibly ridiculous it is that you are twenty-two years old and just now experiencing your first hangover?”
/> “I wish I had waited longer.” I whine, pushing my hair away from my face. “What time is it?” I ask, not able to locate a clock anywhere in Lo's small apartment.
“Just after seven.” She says, laughing when she sees my eyes widen in surprise.
“In the morning?” I gape, not used to waking up this early.
“Well you passed out at like eight o'clock last night. What do you expect?” She shakes her head at me when I groan out.
“Seriously? My first night of going out and getting really drunk and I pass out at eight in the evening. Wow. It's official.” I throw my hand up in the air dramatically. “I'm pathetic.”
“To be fair.” Lo chimes in. “You were drinking for a good portion of the day. I'm sure that had something to do with it. By the way.” She says, standing and making her way towards the kitchen. “You need to call Bentley.” She says, her back to me as she refills her cup of coffee.
Immediately my stomach twists nervously as I struggle to sort through everything that happened yesterday, pre and post drunk Anna. “Why do I need to call him?” I ask, settling that I can't remember why on earth calling him would be something I would do this morning, considering I am still somewhat upset over the events that took place yesterday afternoon.
“Because you passed out with him on the phone last night and I promised I would have you call him when you woke up this morning.” She says, turning to face me just in time to see the panic seep across my face.
“I talked to him last night?” I choke out, my mind trying desperately to recall said event but with absolutely no luck.
“You really were wasted weren't you?” Lo shakes her head at me as she crosses the space and rejoins me on the couch.
“What was your first clue?” I bite at her sarcastically. “What did I say to him? Please tell me I didn't make a fool out of myself.” I turn inward to face her.
“You barely said five words to him before your head hit the couch and you passed out cold.” She laughs, taking a sip of her coffee.
“Thank God.” I breathe out a sigh of relief, suddenly grateful for my inability to handle my liquor.
“Don't go thanking any gods yet.” Her forehead crinkles together in a way that tells me there is more but she doesn't want to be the one to tell me.
“What?” I ask, my voice weak.
“Well, do you remember the conversation we had at the bar?” She asks.
“You need to be a little more specific.” I give her an annoyed look.
“About the fact that you are in love with Bentley.” She says, just as I take a drink of coffee. The hot liquid gets stuck somewhere in my throat and I come up sputtering and coughing. “You don't remember any of it do you?” She adds, clearly basing her statement on my reaction.
“I vaguely remember talking about my feelings for him, yes.” I admit, the knot in my stomach returning ten fold as I start to map out what she's getting at.
“Well, we sort of made a plan as we were leaving the bar.” She admits, her face lined with apology. “And well, you kind of told Bentley you loved him last night.” She braces herself for what she clearly expects to be an emotional outburst from me.
Truth is, I had already figured it out in my head before she even said the words so the impact isn't that great. And while I toss the idea around of Bentley knowing how I feel, I can't help but feel somewhat happy that in my drunken state, I just blurted it out. Who knows if I would have ever let myself say it otherwise. Now that it's out there, I have to admit, I feel lighter somehow. Like an enormous weight has been lifted.
“Say something.” Lo breaks into my thoughts, clearly worried about my reaction to the news of my conversation last night with Bentley.
“What's there to say?” I ask with a shrug, taking a sip of my coffee. “It's not like I can take it back. It's been said. It's out there now. Let's see what he does with it.” I say, taking another drink of coffee.
“Who are you?” Lo interjects, clearly confused by my reaction.
“I don't know.” I admit, feeling weirdly at odds with myself. Not able to really get a grasp on me anymore. “Before Bentley.” I continue, not even really meaning to speak aloud. “I knew exactly who I was. I knew myself, what I was capable of and what I wasn't. I knew where my life was going. But now, I feel like I don't know anything anymore. He makes me question the girl I thought I was. What I want to do with my life and what truly makes me happy. He makes me say things I would have never said and feel things I refused to let myself feel before. It's so confusing and yet so freeing at the same time.” I say, finally meeting Lo's gaze.
“Now you understand what it means to be in love.” She smiles sweetly at me as she takes a sip of her coffee.
“Yeah.” I admit. “I guess I do.”
****
“Where the hell have you been?” Andrea pounces on me the moment I push my way into our dorm room, closing the door behind me on a heavy exhale.
“I stayed at Lo's.” I say, crossing the space and pushing all my crap off the top of my bed onto the floor before collapsing down onto the mattress.
“And you couldn't call?” She asks, hovering over me, hands on her hips.
“Sorry Mom.” I turn my gaze towards her.
“Shut up.” She shakes her head at me. “You're hungover.” She laughs the moment she registers the dark circles under my eyes and the way I squint into the brightness of the room like I am looking directly into the sun.
While the pills Lo gave me eased the pounding in my head slightly, it certainly did not take it completely away. Add on the fact that my stomach decided to reject the contents from last night on top of two cups of coffee I had this morning, I think it's safe to say I feel like I have been hit by a semi-truck.
“That obvious?” I whine, pulling my pillow out from under my head and laying it across my face.
“Well considering I have been there plenty of times myself, yes, I'd say it's pretty obvious.” She laughs, pulling the pillow away from my face.
“I just need a few minutes to get rid of this headache and then I'll get my shit in order.” I say, gesturing to all my belongings just piled around me.
“No worries.” She smiles down at me, her long brown hair falling into her face. “Collin is taking me out to breakfast. Do you want anything?” She asks, my stomach doubling over at the thought of food.
“No.” I immediately croak out, shaking my head adamantly. “Where is Mr. Lover Boy anyway?” I ask, squinting around the room.
“He's in the shower.” She gestures to the door on the right wall that leads into a bathroom we share with the room next to ours. Nodding my head, I lay my arm across my forehead, trying to block the head splintering brightness.
“Is there anything you need from me?” She asks, both of us turning towards the door when a wet body appears from the bathroom, covered only in a small white towel.
While I am not the least bit attracted to Collin, that doesn't mean that I can't appreciate a nice body when I see one and he definitely has that going for him. He's rocking one hell of a six pack and has just the smallest line of hair trailing down his lower belly and then disappearing under the small towel that barely covers his mid section.
“Really Collin?” Andrea laughs the moment he closes the door behind him.
“What? You've never complained about me being naked before.” He crosses the space in two seconds flat and pulls her into his wet frame.
“Collin.” She laughs out in protest. “You're getting me all wet.”
“I thought you liked it when I made you wet.” He nips at her bottom lip and I have to physically force myself not to groan out at his cheesy line.
“Oh hey.” He says, catching sight of me. “I didn't realize you were here.” He says, looking down at his towel and then back up to me, clearly knowing from the moment he walked through the door that I was in the room.
“Just pretend I'm not.” I say, covering my eyes with my arm again.
By the time Andrea and
Collin leave just a few short minutes later, I am already on the cusp of sleep. Feeling like my body has been through the ringer, I can't force myself to do anything but snuggle deeper into the covers.
I consider getting up, calling Bentley. But for whatever reason, I can't bring myself to do it. I feel like with the confession I apparently made last night, maybe I should give him sometime to digest the news. Though given how clear he's made his feelings for me, you would think he would be glad to hear it. But deep down, a small part of me is really worried that by saying the words, I may have just sealed our fate.
I know men like Bentley. And I understand the chase I have presented to him from the very beginning. Even after he told me he was in love with me, I still hadn't caved on my feelings for him, which in turn, kind of kept the chase going.
What if once he realizes that he has me, he no longer wants me? I meant what I said to Lo earlier. I don't even know who I am anymore. I feel like so much has changed so rapidly that I can't keep up with any of it. Which then causes a new fear to settle deep beneath my skin. How much longer before I have lost myself entirely and the Anna I thought I knew so well, no longer exists?
Clearly not able to shut my brain off, I decide not to give into the what if scenarios my mind is currently hell bent on obsessing over. Throwing back the covers, I pull myself out of bed on a loud groan, grabbing my phone from my nightstand the moment my feet hit the floor. Swiping the screen, I can't help the disappointment that seethes through me when I see that I have no new text messages and no missed calls.
Deciding I just need to keep myself busy until the uncertainty I feel from last night fades, I pick up a box from the floor and set it on the bed, slowly pulling out its contents and putting them away before moving onto the next box.
By the time Andrea and Collin return from their breakfast date, I have most of my things put away and the last two boxes are sitting on my bed. Somewhere in the middle of unpacking, I managed to hop into the shower. I now look and feel like a completely different person.
You and I Together Page 6