But that wasn’t true. As ambiguous as the spirit had been, he had provided Sebastian with answers. It was just a matter of interpreting them. However, that could take days, and if the talisman wasn’t lying to him, he was dealing with hours.
“So what am I going to do?” he said in frustration.
He didn’t know why he bothered asking the question, because he knew he only had one option. The safety of the coven was at stake, and he had to know just how long they had before disaster befell them. Only Sarah might know that answer, so he had to ask Ryan to give her the shot and hope for the best.
“Ryan?” he called.
“Yes?” Ryan said, coming back into the room.
“Give Sarah the shot.”
While he listened to Ryan moving in the background, he reviewed his conversation with Wanága.
Look at Sarah. It takes more than eyes to see.
Impulsively, Sebastian let his mind travel back over the time he’d spent with Sarah. He saw her standing in moonlight, a snake curled around her arm as she threatened to kill him. But even when he’d escaped her bevy of rattlesnakes and ended up with Willow wrapped around his neck, Sarah hadn’t given the snake the order to kill. From there, his mind flashed to the cave. He could see the proud tilt to her chin as she told him she was the guardian of her people. Her dedication to them was so strong that she’d lifted Willow to her neck to commit suicide so Sebastian couldn’t get her triangle.
Now that he’d opened the dam, a flood of memories washed through him. He saw Sarah lying on the ground, her hand burned from the talisman’s lightning. He remembered her horrified look when he’d informed her she was the talisman’s instrument of destruction. He shivered as he remembered her attempt to escape him, and then he recalled her dying gasps when he’d cast a spell over her. He smiled at the memory of her smile when she’d had amnesia and had the momentary release from her duty. He frowned at the recollection of her look of terror when he trapped her in the meadow, and the lightning wreath cocooning her to draw him into the talisman’s trap.
And then there was their lovemaking. Those images were so provocative that even the memories made him hard.
But it was the tearful tremor in her voice that cut at his heart as he remembered her saying, “When this is over and we’ve defeated the talisman—and I know we’ll defeat it—I want you to promise you’ll help me kill myself.”
When he objected, she’d said, “Before you say no, I want you to understand that I’ll do this with or without your help.” Then she’d added, “All my life I’ve been alone. Please, Sebastian. Don’t abandon me at the end. Don’t make me die alone.”
Finally, he recalled that when he told her the coven would confine her but she’d never want for anything, she’d said that she’d spent the past twenty years training to be the guardian. She’d further stated that she wouldn’t trade that prison for another, that if she couldn’t dream of having a husband and a family, then she didn’t want a life at all.
Witches and warlocks were incapable of tears, but Sebastian would have sworn he felt their hot sting at that moment. Sarah—beautiful, brave, golden-eyed Sarah—had spent her life as a pawn. Her people had used her to be their guardian. Now the talisman used her to reach its evil goal. Even Sebastian used her in his fight to stop the talisman. Everyone took from her, and the only thing she asked for in return was that Sebastian wouldn’t let her die alone.
At that moment, Sebastian knew that he’d just broken the vow he’d made the day he’d become the troubleshooter. He’d sworn that he would never fall in love because his job was too risky. He wasn’t about to leave a witch mourning for him for the rest of her life if he were killed.
Well, he’d kept part of the vow, he admitted ruefully. He hadn’t fallen in love with a witch, but he was falling in love with a woman who was neither witch nor mortal. She was also doomed for all eternity, and no amount of love would ever change that.
“I’m ready to give Sarah the shot,” Ryan suddenly said.
“No! Get out of here until I call for you,” Sebastian rasped, blindly swinging his arm out and starting in surprise when he felt it connect with Ryan.
But the contact wasn’t enough to alleviate his agitation. If anything, it aggravated it, because he suddenly understood Wanága’s ambiguities. He’d been trying to make Sebastian see that he was falling in love with Sarah. He’d also been trying to make Sebastian understand that though he said he wanted her awake to ask her questions, he really wanted her to awaken and reassure him that she was okay.
As soon as he made that admission, he understood what Wanága had meant about the shot. It wouldn’t physically harm Sarah, but it would emotionally, because a shot was impersonal. By having Ryan give it to her, she would think that Sebastian didn’t care about her, only about what she could do for him. She’d feel more alone—more used—and that would give her less reason to want to live. And he had to make her want to live, because no matter how hopeless their future was, he knew he couldn’t face it without her.
But the only way she’d have a reason to live was if he let her know that she was wanted and needed for herself, not for what she could do for him. To give her that reassurance, he had to wake her up with his love.
“Sebastian, I don’t understand what’s wrong,” Ryan said.
“You don’t need to understand. Just get out,” Sebastian snapped. “Now!”
Ryan didn’t answer, but Sebastian listened to the door open and close. Then he leaned forward and let his hands slide across the sheet until he found Sarah’s shoulders.
Gently, he pulled her up into his arms and cradled her against his chest as he hoarsely whispered in her ear, “Wake up for me, Sarah. Please, wake up. Somehow I’ll find a way to fix everything so you can have the happiness you deserve. I promise. Just wake up for me. Please. Wake up. I need you.”
SARAH KNEW SHE dreamed, but it didn’t lessen the fear that coiled inside her. She stood in the center of a long, dark hallway, and she could feel the walls closing in on her. She had to escape before they crushed her, but she couldn’t decide which direction she should go.
She glanced frantically toward one end of the corridor, where she saw an open door through which sunlight streamed. Then she looked toward the other end. That door opened into murky blackness, but she could see a man’s shadowy form standing there waiting for her. Although she couldn’t see the man’s face, his breadth and height assured her it was Sebastian.
Her instincts screamed at her to head for the safety of the light. Her heart, however, begged her to go to Sebastian. Unable to make a decision, she stood there frozen while the walls continued to close in on her.
Fool, John Butler suddenly said. The wicáhmunga stands in darkness. What more proof do you need that he is your enemy? If you go to him, he will destroy you, and you cannot let him destroy you. You are the guardian. You must protect your people.
Wanága says they are not my people. He says I am the last of the Thunderbeings, she said, searching the lighted door for Butler. She knew that’s where his voice came from, but he wasn’t standing there waiting for her. He hid from her, but why?
But you are pregnant, so you are not the last of the Thunderbeings, Butler countered. That alone should prove that everything Wanága has told you is a lie. However, he did not lie about one thing. He is here to help the wicáhmunga destroy you, and when you die, so will your child. Will you do that to your son, Sarah? Will you abandon him to death, just as your mother tried to do to you? Or will you choose to live so that he may live?
Sarah pressed her hand to her abdomen and shivered. She’d looked into her child’s eyes, and she knew he was evil. She also knew he was the talisman’s chosen, that it would use him to carry out its unholy goal of death and destruction until all of mankind was lost.
And among his victims would be the very people she’
d spent her life training to protect—the people Leonard had entrusted into her care. If she let her child be born, their blood would be on her hands as surely as if she’d killed them herself. She’d have failed Leonard, the only person who’d ever loved her.
But the only way to stop the talisman was to sacrifice her child, and she knew she couldn’t do that. Good or evil, he was a part of her. He was also a part of Sebastian, and suddenly, she knew that the image of her son—the image the talisman had provided—wasn’t exactly true. Yes, it had chosen her son as its instrument of destruction, and yes, the child had the propensity for evil. But she knew in her heart—in her soul—that Sebastian could save their son from his heinous destiny. Sebastian could make the child good and kind and decent. He could turn him into a protector instead of a destroyer.
That’s why you don’t want Sebastian to know I’m pregnant! she gasped, staring at the lighted doorway. She suddenly understood why Butler hid from her rather than standing there waiting for her. He knew that if she saw him, she’d see through his lies to the truth! Sebastian can change the future, can’t he? He can save our son, and that will destroy the talisman, which in effect, will destroy you, because you have become its personification. It lives because you live, but if you die, it will die.
Fool! John Butler declared again. If you turn to the wicáhmunga, you will die. You will never hold your child in your arms. You will never hear him call you mother. You will end your life as you began it—abandoned and alone!
You’re lying to me! Sarah yelled, suddenly furious that she hadn’t seen the truth all along. I may die, but I won’t be alone. Sebastian will stand by my side to the very end, and he will take our child and raise it as it should be raised. He will teach it right from wrong, just as Leonard taught me. But my son will be stronger than I am, because he won’t be vying for the love of a stranger. He will be secure in the love of his father.
You are not thinking clearly, Butler said, his voice now crooning. Look at the wicáhmunga, Sarah. He exists in darkness, not light, and darkness is the habitat of evil.
Sebastian exists in darkness because you made me blind him, Sarah shot back. He saw the truth from the beginning, and you made me take away his sight so he would doubt himself. You made him blind so he would seem weak to me and I would doubt him. But you underestimated him, because even in darkness, he sees the truth, and I am going to help him defeat you.
She turned her back on the doorway of light and started walking toward the darkness and Sebastian. She knew she made the right decision. Sebastian existed in darkness, but he was the true light.
However, her confrontation with Butler had opened her eyes to a more momentous truth that filled her heart with a mixture of soaring joy and abject terror. Joy, because she knew she was irrevocably in love with Sebastian. Terror, because she understood exactly what the talisman planned. Sebastian was the real threat to its existence, because, as she’d told Butler, he could save their son from his evil destiny. That meant the talisman had to kill Sebastian to stop that from happening. She had to get to Sebastian and warn him!
Go to the wicáhmunga and you condemn yourself! Butler screamed. Your place is here with me. We are the power!
There never was a we, and there never will be! Sarah screamed back as the walls started moving in on her at an accelerated speed. Recognizing her time was running out, she started running toward Sebastian as she added, You are nothing more than a voice for the talisman, John Butler. It has never granted you its powers and it never will, because the power does not belong to you. It belongs to me and my son. You were born a nothing, and you will die a nothing.
You’re wrong! I am the power, and I’ll soon prove that to you. I will kill you, your lover, and your son!
If you believe that, you’re a bigger fool than I could ever be, Sarah rejoined as she neared Sebastian. You can’t kill me, because the talisman won’t let you. It needs me alive so my son can be born. But I will make sure that you and the talisman are destroyed long before that happens.
With that, she launched herself into Sebastian’s arms, and she heard the corridor’s walls slam closed behind her. But the reverberating sound didn’t drown out John Butler’s parting shot.
When you open your eyes, you will remember nothing you have learned here, Sarah. But before this day is over, the wicáhmunga will be dead, and you will be the one to have killed him.
Chapter 19
Evil Advances
“DAMN BITCH!” John Butler yelled furiously as his eyes flew open. He lay on the bed in his ratty motel room, glaring at the sagging, water-damaged ceiling overhead. But it wasn’t the ceiling he saw. It was a replay of the vision he’d just shared with Sarah.
As his mind relived those moments when Sarah walked away from him, her words resounded in his mind. The power does not belong to you. It belongs to me and my son. You were born a nothing, and you will die a nothing.
He bounded off the bed and paced the room, his rage mounting with each step. She was trying to steal the power and the glory from him, just as The Bitch had tried to steal the Middle East dig from him. Well, he’d taken care of The Bitch, and he’d take care of Sarah too. He knew exactly what to do with people who stole from him.
Stroking the circle hanging around his neck, he marched toward the door. “It’s time I show you just how much power I have, Sarah. I’m on my way to you, and when I get there, I’ll make you kill the wicáhmunga. Then I’ll kill you and your bastard son. And it will be your fault, Sarah. I was willing to share my power with you. Together we could have ruled the world. Now I’ll rule it alone.”
SEBASTIAN THOUGHT Sarah would wake gradually, and he was unprepared for the explosive way she came to life in his arms. One moment she was as limp as a rag doll. The next she flung her arms around his neck with such force that she nearly knocked them off the bed.
As he shifted his body to maintain his balance, he shook his head, dazed. Her volatile physical rousing was unexpected, but it was her mental state that stunned him. She’d awakened with her mind wide open to his, and the absolute terror racing through her engulfed him until he trembled as violently from it as she did.
Why is she so frightened? he wondered, wishing he could see her face. But he was blind, and he had to be satisfied with searching her mind for the source of her terror. He quickly determined that she didn’t know why she was frightened, which didn’t surprise him. According to Wanága, she’d fallen asleep because she wasn’t supposed to remember Sebastian’s future. A shiver of apprehension crawled up his spine. For her to be this afraid, the talisman must have one hell of a plan in store for him.
But that was the future, and he’d worry about it when it got here. Now he needed to reassure Sarah.
“It’s all right, Sarah,” he murmured, hugging her trembling body close. “I’m here, and I’m not going to let anything hurt you. Everything’s all right. I promise.”
She released a shuddering breath and rested her head against his chest. He stroked her back and murmured soothingly until he felt the tension ease from her body.
Several minutes passed before she raised her head. When she did, she let out a soft cry.
“What’s wrong?” he asked in concern, raising his hands to cup her face.
“Your eyes,” she whispered hoarsely. “How could I have done that to you? What kind of a monster am I?”
“You aren’t a monster, Sarah. You’re a victim of the talisman,” he said, brushing his thumbs across her silken cheeks and feeling the dampness of tears. They tore at his heart, and he wanted to haul her back into his arms.
Before he could, she pulled away from him and scrambled off the bed, tearfully saying, “Victim or not, I’m still a monster. I wish . . .”
“Wish what?”
“I wish Leonard had never found me in the woods,” she said as he heard her begin to pace. “Where are w
e?”
“At Ryan’s medical clinic,” he answered, trying to brush against her mind to learn what she thought. What did she mean by Leonard finding her in the woods? He frowned, frustrated when he found that she was again closed to him, and he suddenly realized how little he knew about her.
“Why don’t I remember coming here?” she asked.
“You were cocooned by the lightning wreath. When it released us, you . . . fell asleep. Ryan thinks that something frightened you so badly that you weren’t ready to face it. Do you remember something scaring you?”
“No, but . . .”
“But?” he encouraged.
“I have this urgent need to tell you something important, but I can’t remember what it is,” she said, her tone frustrated.
“Well, I’m sure that whatever it is will eventually come to you, so don’t worry about it,” he said, sure that it was his future she couldn’t remember. Deciding to divert her attention, he said, “You might be able to help me with something else. The protective barrier around Sanctuary is disintegrating. Do you know how long we have before it’s gone?”
She was silent for a long moment, and then she said, “I’m not sure, but noon keeps repeating in my head.”
Sebastian frowned. It was early evening, so noon was more than seventeen hours away, which didn’t coincide with his twelve-hour time frame. If Sarah was right, why had the talisman been telling him twelve hours? Was it providing two times to keep him off base? Or was it predicting two separate events? Of course, it could be lying to both of them.
His musing was interrupted by a knock on the door, and he called out permission to enter.
“Sebastian, I hate to bother you, but Oran Morovang is here,” Ryan said, opening the door. Then he declared, “Sarah! I’m glad to see you’re awake. How are you feeling?”
“Fine,” Sarah mumbled.
“I bet Sarah would like to freshen up, Ryan,” Sebastian said, deciding that was the easiest way to occupy her while he met with Oran. “Why don’t you ask Zachary to get her things from the car and show her where the bathroom is? Then you can ask Oran to come in.”
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