by Pratt, Lulu
“Hi! Can I help you with something?” a small woman asked from the back of the store. Her voice was high pitched and squeaky, somehow matching her thin frame and bright orange hair.
“I’m just looking for a new dress,” I explained as I glanced through a rack of colorful dresses.
It had been so long since I did anything nice for myself, I almost felt greedy after already treating myself to an impromptu hair and nail appointment. Last Christmas had been all about me, but now I only wanted to make everything special for Chris.
“With your figure, I’d go for something that hugs those curves,” the woman said. “Oh, don’t blush, I wish I had that body! I’ve got the frame of a ten-year-old boy, so there are some things I just can’t wear.”
“Like what?” I huffed a little. She was as thin as a model, and I couldn’t imagine any dress not looking amazing on her.
“Come back here. Let me show you,” she said, walking to the back of the store without even checking to see if I followed.
“Try this on,” she held out a hanger holding a black dress with what looked to be ruffles at the neckline.
“What is this? I don’t think that’s my style,” I tried to explain.
“Go in there and try it on,” she pointed to a black curtain hanging below a sign that read ‘Fitting Room.’
Certain she was not the type of woman who backed down easily, I did as she said, pulling the curtain behind me after walking into the small room. After a deep breath, I pulled my floral sundress over my head before carefully taking the black dress off the hanger.
“This doesn’t even have a size on it,” I said through the curtain.
“It’s your size!” she yelled back with a chuckle.
Laughing to myself, I pulled the dress over my head, delicately pulling the soft fabric down my hips. It was a sleeveless dress and what I thought were ruffles actually folded along my chest to reveal my shoulders. Confident I’d put it on correctly, although there was no mirror, I pulled the curtain to the side, holding my hands to the side as I presented myself.
“I’m so good at my job, it’s sick! I disgust myself!” The sales attendant shook her head with a big smile as she looked at me. Unable to contain myself I laughed loudly at her outburst.
“Come check this out,” she ordered. This time, she directed me to a full-length mirror.
My laughter instantly faded as I saw my reflection. I’d known I was a pretty girl since my childhood, but I felt always lacked the sex appeal other girls oozed. Blinking slowly, I couldn’t believe the body connected to my neck, turning to see myself from different angles.
“Had no idea what was hiding underneath that outfit, huh?” she smirked, poking fun at my sundress.
“I’ve never…” I stated in disbelief, running my hand over the curve of my bottom, shocked by my voluptuous body.
Just then, the bell announcing the opening of the door to the boutique sounded, and we both turned to see a blonde woman walk through the door.
“Tell your man he can write his thank you cards out to Mallory,” the woman winked before walking to the front of the door to greet the new shopper.
After a few more glimpses of myself, I decided to wear the dress out, not wanting to take it off. My hair flowed down my back, teasing the low neckline. My full breasts peeked out, showing just a little cleavage, and the dress stopped just below my knees. The fit was sexy, but the length was more than modest, making it the perfect balance.
“You look fabulous,” the customer said when she noticed me still admiring my reflection.
“Thank you,” I blushed. “I think I’ll take it,” I said to Mallory.
“Girl, that dress already took you!”
We all laughed, and I pulled back the curtain to retrieve my dress just as Mallory poked her head in the fitting room. “You need to leave that dress right there.”
“What?” I replied, confused.
“What’s your name?” she asked.
“Holly.”
“Okay, well that dress represents the old Holly, and this,” she moved her hand up and down beside my frame, “represents the new Holly.”
Nodding, I understood exactly what she meant. I’d been hiding in that dress, unsure of who I was after giving birth. Even more than the changes to my body were those to my care-free attitude. I’d been keeping a secret for a year and it was overwhelming.
Now that Jude knew the truth, I felt like I could finally be myself a little. There was no reason in hiding behind my oversized clothes, or busying myself with work to avoid the questions I didn’t want to ask.
Protecting Chris and providing the best life possible for him had become my main focus, but that didn’t mean I had to forget about myself. Loving him didn’t mean neglecting me, and after a day at the salon, I felt better than I had in months.
Remembering Dr. Wallis’ words, I decided to follow Mallory’s advice and leave the old Holly behind, because the best thing I could ever give my son is the best version of myself.
“You’re right,” I agreed.
“Holly, I’m always right. Now, meet me at the register so I can tell you where you need to wear that pretty little dress,” she smiled, taking my old floral sundress from the small bench in the fitting room before leaving me alone.
Staring at myself in the mirror, I felt confident and free, ready to take on the world. I hadn’t even realized I was overdue for a makeover, but now that was done, I was eager to show off my improvements.
“Get away from the mirror, Holly!” Mallory yelled in her high-pitched voice and I guiltily giggled before making my way to her squeaky laugh.
Chapter Twenty
JUDE
“CAN YOU HAVE them delivered today?” Dylan asked the salesman sitting behind his desk.
We’d been to three different vendors as he placed orders and followed up on deliveries. It was intriguing to see Dylan handling business. In all the years we’d been friends never did I see him as a career man.
He was the easy-going one who helped you keep things simple. Dylan never took anything too seriously, including himself. That was until he’d stepped into his father’s shoes, helping lead the family hospitality business.
“It looks like they can go out with the noon deliveries,” the man announced to Dylan.
“Excellent!” Dylan extended his hand happily, and the two men shook before the man handed Dylan a sheet of paper.
“You’ll want to leave this with the front desk. Our delivery man will need to see that as proof of payment,” he explained as I peeked over Dylan’s shoulder to read the printout.
“Sure thing. I’ll be in touch for that other order we talked about,” Dylan nodded as he folded the paper before sliding it in his back pocket.
“We’re working on it now,” the man called. We were already out the door, and Dylan waved his hand over his head as a sign that he’d heard him.
So much had changed since I’d left Savannah that at times the people I loved most were unrecognizable. Dylan was the most extreme example, but I was proud of his growth. Standing outside the small storefront, he scrolled on his phone before making a call.
“This will only take a minute,” he whispered. “Doug? Hey, it’s Dylan Foster…”
Walking away to give him more privacy, I wondered if I were moving in the same direction as he and Holly. They were both so clear about what they wanted to do and who they were. Sure, I was living in New York, working for an international financial powerhouse, but that wasn’t enough to define me.
My new promotion meant I’d have more responsibilities to match the increased salary, which in some ways felt impossible. I was already working more than sixty hours a week to bring in the highest returns for my growing client list.
Any down time I had was spent rubbing elbows with the elite, hoping to score a new account or network my way into a better firm. Everything was about money.
Being back in Savannah was making me question everything, including my definiti
on of success, especially this visit. The idea of working harder to afford more things didn’t sound too appealing, especially when I remembered how long I was counting down for this two-week break.
It was the only holiday I allowed myself, and as much as I liked to attribute my excitement to see Holly for my eagerness, I knew it was deeper. I wanted a break from the stress of my career, and a view outside the concrete jungle that now didn’t feel like home.
Glancing around downtown Savannah, I took a deep breath, admiring the trees, still too green for December. My mother used to say that Georgia trees fought the winter, holding onto their color for much longer than other trees. After years in New York, I’d come to agree with her. It was a marvel that they would be the highlight of Christmas for so many children, just as they had been for me.
“All right, let’s get back to this,” Dylan said, jolting me back to reality. “We’ve got two more stops and then we’ll get that drink,” he smirked, nudging my side with his elbow.
“I’ve got to say, I’m pretty impressed with all you’ve got going on here,” I admitted, nodding like a proud father.
“Oh, you didn’t think I could do more than party, huh?” he asked, and I laughed to avoid agreeing with him.
Dylan knew his reputation, and throughout college it seemed he took every opportunity to live up to it. He was known for wild toga parties and passing out on front lawns with less clothes than necessary. It was who he was, but now I was realizing it wasn’t who he would always be.
“Can I just say I’m proud of you without you turning it into an insult?” I quipped, watching his cheeks slightly redden, uncomfortable with the compliment.
“Thanks, that means a lot,” he finally said, smiling bashfully before his eyes lit up. “Where in the world are you going?” he asked, talking to someone behind me.
Turning, I squinted to make out the figure. My eyes were too focused on the curves filling the black dress, but when I made my way to the hazel eyes forever ingrained in my memory, I was shocked beyond words.
“I’m serious! I want to know where in the world you think you’re going,” Dylan repeated with a faked annoyance.
“I guess to clean up whatever mess you two have made,” Holly shot back with a hand on her hip.
She was stunning, even more beautiful than usual. Her hair fell in big waves, shinier than usual as it danced with every step, resting on her bare shoulders. It was strange how sexy she was, considering the only skin showing besides her shoulders was below her knees.
“No, ma’am. I just checked with the florist, the food delivery people and the furniture vendor. I’ve got to go check on the security and cleaning crew, and then we’re all set,” Dylan read off his completed to do list with pride, his chest poked out.
“Look at you getting this all done,” she teased him before glancing at me.
I was watching her like a hawk, noticing her every move. Holly seemed to have changed from the last time I saw her, just the previous evening at the parade. She stood taller, more confident, and the bashful look had vanished from her gorgeous eyes. Staring back at me was a woman in control, and the only emotion I could read in her eyes was desire.
Electricity pumped through my veins as I failed to look away. She was too gorgeous, my body was frozen. From the way her tongue shot out to seductively slide across her lips, I thought Dylan might know there was something between us. It was almost too intimate, and I forced myself to breathe deeply.
“So, there’s an adult prom now? Is that it?” Dylan teased, his hands on his hips as if he were truly baffled.
“It doesn’t matter. If there was, you wouldn’t have a date again,” Holly sassed, and even I had to laugh.
It was an ongoing joke how Dylan got stood up for our senior prom. He’d been dating a girl for a few months, but the night of the dance she was nowhere to be found. As one of the most popular kids in school, he could have had his pick of girls for a date, but of all the possibilities, his ended up with a stomach flu on the most important day of our high school lives.
“That’s a low blow and you know it!”
“Well, don’t talk about my new dress,” Holly shrugged.
“You don’t–” Dylan started, stopping at the sound of his cell phone ringing before again holding one finger up and taking a call. “This is Dylan Foster… Uh huh… Yeah, for sure… Oh, I can do that… No problem… I’ll talk to you soon.”
“Who was that?” Holly asked as soon as he ended the call.
“I need to get back to the hotel. Can you drop Jude off for me? Sorry, bro, we’ll get that beer later,” Dylan wrapped me in a hug before leaving as quickly as he delegated his orders. Watching him walk to his car before pulling off, I finally turned to Holly.
“You look amazing.”
“Oh? Now you can tell me?” she joked.
“God, I thought he was going to know if I looked at you any longer,” I shook my head, still captivated by her transformation.
“I decided to take a day to myself,” she explained, shrugging her shoulders nonchalantly.
“Well, whatever you did was money well spent,” I smiled, stepping closer.
“Have you thought of… uh… what we talked about?” she nervously asked.
“About my son?” I rhetorically asked, raising my eyebrows. “It’s all I’ve thought of,” I answered before she responded, stepping even closer as I placed my hand on her hip.
The past day had been nothing more than a blur after learning the truth about Chris. When Dylan offered to get me out the house, I jumped at the opportunity, hoping for a few brief moments of clear thinking.
“I’ve thought about it a lot too,” Holly added, gazing up into my eyes.
“You are so beautiful.”
It was the only thought that would come to me as I stared into her eyes. Knowing the truth was like getting to know a new layer of her. Everything made more sense — the changes to her body, her newfound independence, and even her no-bullshit mentality.
Holly had blossomed and there was no doubt in my mind she would succeed at any and everything she set her mind to.
“Thank you,” she blushed, stepping backwards.
My hand burned without her touch, and I craved for privacy with her. There were too many words to say, too many kisses to plant, too many things I could only express with my body.
“Let me take you on a date,” I heard myself say.
“A date?”
“Yes, a date.”
“When?” Holly giggled, her innocent smile re-emerging.
“Now.”
From the way she looked at me, I knew she was as smitten as me. She had been handling everything on her own, forced to be the woman and man of the house. I wanted to ease her load as much as possible until she truly believed she could lean on me whenever she wanted.
“Where do you want to go?” she asked.
“It’s a secret. Where are you parked?” I held my hand out, silently requesting her keys. With a smile she obliged, placing the heavy key ring in my hand.
“Are you a part-time janitor?” I teased, holding up the large key ring. Holly burst into laughter, snatching the keys back from my hand.
“Those keys are the different parts of my life — my home, my car, my parents’ place, the hotel, the spa, my personal office at work and various work-related keys. I even have Dylan’s spare key on here for his place.”
As we walked through old Savannah, our bodies occasionally brushing against one another every three steps or so, Holly held up one key at a time, telling me its purpose. Listening intently, I wished she would do the same with locked parts of herself.
I only wished it was as easy to learn the keys that unlocked her, so that she could let me into those places she reserved only for the most trusted people in her life. A deep longing in my chest wanted to be everything for her — the desire feeling foreign.
I’d never saw a future with a woman I dated, but with Holly everything was more real than I was
used to. She knew me in ways other people couldn’t understand. And now she was the mother of my child, an honor I held close to my heart. She’d gone through so much for me without a single instance of praise or gratitude.
As I held the passenger car door open, watching Holly carefully climb inside, I vowed to myself to make sure she understood my appreciation before I boarded my flight back to New York.
Chapter Twenty-One
HOLLY
“YOU REALLY don’t care where we go?” Jude asked as he started the engine, moving the driver’s seat back to accommodate his height.
“No, not really. My mom has Chris, so I’ve got a few hours of free time,” I smiled.
“So, what do you usually do on your days off?” Jude asked, glancing at me as he pulled onto the main street.
It was rare for me to have time to myself that wasn’t spent at home without Chris or at the spa and hotel. I didn’t have any ideas what we should do. Twisting my lips to the side, I bit my cheek, thinking of possibilities, when it hit me.
“I don’t usually have unplanned days off,” I said before biting my bottom lip, a bit embarrassed.
Living in New York, Jude was probably the life of every party. When I allowed myself to imagine his life, it always included fancy restaurants and movie premieres. Glancing out the window, I hoped he wasn’t disappointed in how boring things were back home, as I knew there was no way Savannah could ever compare to the bright lights of a big city.
“Okay, anything I want, right?” Jude asked, his strong hands wrapped around my knee as he squeezed tightly, quickly gaining my attention.
“That tickles!” I whined, playfully pushing at his hand as a rush of excitement flashed up my spine.
“Anything I want?” he repeated, his eyes darkening with passion.
“Anything you want.” I heard the desire in my own tone as my pelvis tightened with need.
Leaning back against the headrest, I watched the colorful brownstone homes lining the streets passed by, wondering what Jude was thinking. Part of me hoped he wanted me as much as I wanted him, but knowing I wasn’t ready to act on my impulses caused a swirl of anxiety to build in my belly.