“You can ask me anything, and I promise I’ll answer as honestly as I can,” he replied. I looked at him for a moment before I spoke, phrasing everything that came out of my mouth with a special kind of care.
“How did you start?” I began. My voice was softer than I had intended, more fearful, and I tried to make it into something more confident so I didn’t sound as if I was scared of him. I wasn’t. But I was worried that what he was about to tell me would change all of that.
“My parents were both big in their own gang families,” he answered calmly. “My mother was a Liago, my father a Rendlesham. There was no way I wasn’t getting involved with gang culture on some level with the two of them involved in my upbringing.”
“Why did you become a… hitman?” I finally managed to get the word out. I couldn’t believe that the man I was lying next to, the man I had to admit I was falling for, used to kill people for money. A shiver ran up and down my spine, and I tried to keep focused.
“It’s tradition for the oldest son in a gang family to become a hitman,” he replied matter-of-factly. “And after my brother died-”
“Your brother died?” I gasped. This was the first I’d heard of any brother. Anthony paused for a moment, taking in a sharp breath before he continued.
“Yeah, he was killed in a turf war,” he explained. “When he was sixteen and I was thirteen.”
“Oh my God, I’m so sorry.” I clasped his hand tightly, but he didn’t even look over at me. He stared up at the ceiling, his face suddenly set, tense and cold.
“After Jacob- that’s my brother- after he died, they put me into training to take his place,” Anthony went on. “And that’s how I ended up as a hitman.”
“I lost my sister, too,” I filled him in mournfully. It felt like such a tragic thing for us to bond over - that the two of us would so easily be able to find tragedy in common.
“How?” he asked gently, stroking my her, and I felt tears prick at my eyes.
“I…” I held my breath. “She was raped. By a man with a snake tattoo across his knuckles. And she couldn’t handle it, couldn’t handle what came after that, so she…”
I let the words hang unspoken in the air between us, and I knew he understood. He pulled me closer, and I quickly refocused my mind on what he had just said.
“So, it wasn’t your choice, then?” I grasped to one little detail, a little detail that could allow me to forgive him. “To become… you know, to become a hitman?”
“It wasn’t my choice,” he agreed. “I wouldn’t have done it had Jacob not died.”
“Oh…”
“But I don’t necessarily regret the fact that I did,” he finished off, and I felt a cold prickle down my scalp.
“Why?” I whispered. How could someone enjoy killing? The two men Anthony had killed to save me, they haunted my nightmares, and I hadn’t even laid a finger on them.
“It’s not about the… it’s not actually about killing people, that’s not the part I like,” he explained. “I don’t hate that- but it’s just a job- I don’t get any actual enjoyment out of it or anything.”
“Okay,” I replied carefully, giving him the space to go on.
“It was everything else. You have to remember, I was a kid when I came to all this stuff, and to me, it was all action and adventure and big money for doing something I found I was naturally pretty good at,” he went on. “I enjoyed that aspect of it, enjoyed the fact that I got to look after myself and live a life that was so different from almost every other guy I knew around my age.”
“So… it wasn’t about the killing?” I repeated.
“No, I don’t enjoy that,” he replied firmly. “I never have.”
He clasped me to his chest, as though he knew how freaked out I was, and I let out a breath I didn’t realize I had been holding. Okay, well, there it was - the truth, in all its ugly glory. I knew him now, knew him truly, knew things I wasn’t even sure I wanted to know. But I was still here, and I had no intention of going anywhere. Everything about Anthony, it was in equal parts thrilling and horrifying, and I wasn’t sure which one came first. I laid my head against his chest and listened to his heartbeat, wondering idly how many heartbeats he’d brought to an end over his years as an assassin. But before my brain could linger for too long, I found myself falling asleep in his arms - the arms of a man who cared for me, the arms of a man who killed people for money. And I had never felt more conflicted in my life.
Chapter Sixteen
I woke early, glancing across at Sabrina to make sure she wasn’t up. She was lying face down on the pillow, her hair spread all over her face so I could barely even see her. She was out for the count, and I slipped out from underneath her arm and headed towards the living room, so I could get washed up and dressed without disturbing her. I probably just had time to do everything I needed to do before she woke up. After all, a direct route back to the city would likely only take me an hour or so at this time in the morning.
I slipped into the car, started the engine, and pulled out onto the highway once more. I found my mind drifting back to the conversation we’d had the night before as I moved on autopilot - she seemed so scared, but so set, so uncertain but so definite. I wasn’t sure what to make of it, and I wasn’t certain she was either.
It didn’t take long for me to get back to the city. Before I knew it, I was pulling up outside Leo’s place, hurrying up the steps and glancing at my watch. I knew that Leo wanted all his hitmen to pick up payment and get their next assignments as soon as possible after they completed their last ones, and I hoped he wouldn’t question why I wasn’t at my usual ungodly hour to do the same.
The security guard stepped aside at once as I came up the stairs, gesturing for me to go straight into Leo’s office. I had tapped on the door before I walked in, feeling a sudden rush of nerves. After all, if Leo for one second figured out what was going on with Sabrina and me, I’d be dead before I hit the ground. And if I was dumb enough to reveal it to him, I deserved to be.
“Ant!” Leo exclaimed warmly as I entered the room. “I thought you’d forgotten to come in.”
“Sorry, I overslept this morning, guess I’m not used to the late nights anymore,” I deflected.
“Well, here’s what I owe you.” Leo pushed a small lump of cash across the desk to me. I wasn’t stupid enough to count it in front of him, and simply picked it up and slid it into my pocket.
“Thanks.” I nodded, and half of me was keen to just get out of there before he could give me another assignment. But he seemed more interested in dragging out the encounter. He steepled his fingers and peered over them at me.
“So, you were working with Saffron last night, right?” he prompted, and I managed a nod.
“How was that? You surprised to see her?” He raised his eyebrows at me. Had he put me with Saffron for a joke, because he knew about our past together? I wouldn’t have put it beyond him and his twisted sense of humor.
“I suppose.” I kept my voice cool. “I didn’t realize she was still working with you.”
“Yeah, she’s been with us a while now,” he agreed. “We helped her clean up her act, get herself back together after all the heroin bullshit.”
“I’m just glad to see she’s doing okay.” I nodded. “Do you have another assignment for me?”
“So keen.” He grinned at me, a flash of shark-like teeth that sent a shiver down my spine. “We do have another assignment for you, as a matter of fact.”
He reached under his desk and pushed across a slim folder. I opened it up and looked inside. The face of a man a few years older than me peered back. He was clean-cut, handsome, and I didn’t recognize him at all.
“Who’s this?” I looked up at Leo, who was observing me calmly.
“He’s a hitman, like you.” His eyes scanned my face for a reaction. “We found out he was working with us because he was trying to take us down from the inside. And you know we can’t stand for that.”
“Of cours
e,” I mumbled. Shit. Fuck. Was he implying something here, or was this just a coincidence?
“We need you to take him down by the end of the week,” Leo snapped back into business-like mode. “Details are in the folder. I trust you’ll be able to handle this one by yourself?”
“Yeah, I won’t need babysitting this time,” I shot back, my voice a little harsher than before. Leo leaned across the table, closing the gap between us, his eyes fixed on mine.
“You know that we can’t stand for anyone who’s here for the wrong reasons, right, Anthony?” He murmured, his voice low and menacing.
“I know.” I furrowed my brow at him, trying to appear confused.
“As long as we’re very clear on that fact.” Leo leaned back, not taking his eyes from mine. We sat in silence for a moment, as if sizing each other up, before he shrugged his shoulders and stood up.
“Let me know when it’s done.” He held his hand out to me. I got to my feet and shook it.
“I will.” I nodded and then turned to head out the door. But before I got there, he spoke again.
“Anthony?”
I turned around.
“Be careful.” Leo flashed me a small smile. I had to rely on my instincts to get me out of that room because it felt as though my entire body had seized up with panic.
As soon as I was back in the car, I knew we needed to move again. Somewhere further away - as far as I could get without cutting myself off from Leo entirely. If I were to pull out now, Leo would suspect me, and I’d be in even bigger trouble than I was at that moment. I knew that he was onto me. I wasn’t sure how certain he was, or how much he knew, but I needed to put as much distance between him and us as I could. I drove fast all the way back to the underground safe house and leaned my head on the wheel as soon as I came to a stop outside. Every time I turned around, it seemed as though I had dropped myself into an even bigger pile of bullshit than before, and nothing I was doing was making it easier.
Chapter Seventeen
I stood over the small stove in the living room-kitchen combo, dancing from one foot to the other and smiling to myself. Yes, last night had been a lot - and I’d woken up without him next to me, which was kind of a kick in the teeth - but I was feeling calm and happy for the first time in a few days, and I couldn’t deny that it was a pretty nice sensation.
I still wasn’t sure what to make of everything he’d said to me the day before. For him, killing people was just a job, and he’d declined to expand on whether or not he was actually still doing it. The thought of him still taking people out for money freaked the shit out of me, but I had to trust him. Hell, he knew the gang landscape better than I did, and he’d probably figure out why I’d been targeted quicker than I could. Or the police, for that matter. I was wearing one of his shirts that I’d rescued from the back of a wardrobe in the bedroom, and the soft cotton felt good against my skin. I tried to keep focused on that, and not the implications of everything he had told me.
Suddenly, the door burst open, and I jumped practically out of my skin. I turned and found Anthony standing behind me, pacing back and forth across the tiled floor.
“Anthony?” I asked quietly, and he looked up as if he’d forgotten I was there.
“I’m just making some breakfast, do you want-”
“Sabrina, we don’t have time. We’ve got to get out of here,” he replied urgently, striding through to the bedroom and returning with my bag. A shot of fear traveled along my spine, and I clenched my fists to distract myself. The pan had just started sizzling with heat on the stove, and the slow, building sound summed up how I felt at that moment in time.
“What’s going on?”
“I went to see Leo, the guy - the man I work for,” he began, and I held up a hand.
“Wait a second. You’re still working?” I demanded.
“Yes, but only so I can figure out what’s going on with you.” He tilted his chin at me. “I know they have something to do with it, and I’m working with Leo again so I can find out what it is and keep you safe.”
I stared at him for a moment. Did I believe him? Did I trust him? He had just told me that the people he worked with were the ones trying to hurt me, after all.
“I know this sounds crazy, but you have to trust me.” He came over to me and placed his hands on my shoulders. “Please, Sabrina. The thought of something happening to you, it’s…”
He let the words hang in the air between us, and I felt a warmth spread across my chest. I had dealt with enough bullshitters to know when I was being lied to, and I could only read truth on his face.
“Why do we have to leave?” I asked as I went to gather my things. “I thought you said we’d be safe here.”
“I thought we would be, but…” He shook his head. “I don’t think we’ve put enough space between Leo and us yet.”
“What did he say to you when you were down there?” I pressed.
“He just…” Anthony closed his eyes for a moment as if even relieving it was too much for him. “I think he’s on to me. And I can’t be sure that he doesn’t know where this place is.”
“Have you got somewhere else for us to go?” I asked as I packed my stuff. I flicked off the stove – the last thing I wanted was this place burning to the ground while we were away. As if Anthony wasn’t paranoid enough.
“I have.” He nodded, running his hands through his hair agitatedly. “It’s not too far from the city actually. We’ll sort of be doubling back on ourselves.”
“You think we should be closer to the city?” I raised my eyebrows at him. “After everything that’s happened?”
“I know what you’re thinking, but trust me.” He stared at me intently. “I know what I’m doing. I need to be nearby so Leo doesn’t click that I’m far out of town.”
“Whatever you say.” I met his gaze. “Just know that I’m trusting you with my life here.”
“I know.” He nodded, his voice soft. “I won’t let you down.”
Suddenly, he darted towards me and wrapped his arms around my neck tightly. I was taken aback - unless we were talking about sex, Anthony wasn’t exactly the physically expressive type. But something about the last few hours had obviously freaked him out enough that he needed someone to cling on to, an anchor to pin him down. I put my arms around him and held him for a moment, comforting him gently, before he pulled back. I could have sworn I saw tears in his eyes, but I didn’t let myself linger on it for too long as he began to move around the apartment with purpose.
“Have you got everything? Taken any food you want for the new place?” He glanced over at me.
“I’ve got everything.” I patted my bag. “I’m ready to go when you are.”
“Good.” He held his hand out to me. “Then let’s get out of here.”
Before I knew it, we were back in the car again. I pressed my head to the window and silently said goodbye to the little homestead I had gotten to know over the last couple of days, and wondered where I was going to end up next.
“How many places do you own?” I asked, turning to Anthony. His eyes were fixed on the road but slightly glazed over as if his mind was elsewhere.
“Huh?” He glanced over at me.
“You said we’re going to another one of the places you own,” I reminded him. “How many places do you have?”
“Twelve,” he replied without a beat, and my eyebrows vanished beneath my hair.
“How many?” I demanded. “Why on earth do you need that many places to live?”
“Some of them are hideouts from the cops, some of them are more for… entertaining.” He shrugged. “I had the money, and I’ve never much been one to stay in one place too long, so…”
“Are they all around the city?” I wondered aloud.
“Not all of them.” A small smile played at the corner of his mouth, and I couldn’t help but be intrigued.
“Where are the others?”
“I’ll tell you once we’re there,” he promised. “I just ne
ed to figure some stuff out right now.”
“Fair enough,” I reached into my bag and pulled out a packet of chips. I started munching on them as quietly as I could as I peered out the window, not wanting to distract him any further. We were heading sort of diagonally across from where we’d been, passing by the city on the way to the coast a good hour’s drive out of town. I had always known that we weren’t too far from the beach where I lived, but I’d never thought to come out there before - it had always seemed like too much hassle. But then I’d never met anyone with an insane beachfront property either, and that helped.
I gasped as I got out of the car. We had driven down a remote little side road that was overlooked by an enormous cliff, but it wasn’t until I got out of the car that I saw what I saw meant to be looking at.
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