“It reminded me of you,” I said, handing it to her. “Beautiful and pure.”
“And likely to wither away over the next few days,” she said. She began a coughing fit, throwing off waves of yellow green light as she ushered me away. She managed to put the rose down on her bedside table.
“It’s a lovely flower,” she said, done with her coughing for the moment. She glanced at me sideways. “Why are you treating me so kindly?”
I shrugged. “We’re practically the only people left around here. Thought we might as well get along.”
“And I’m dying.”
“That too.”
“I’m not sure I want your pity.”
“It’s my pity. I’ll do what I like with it.” I glared at the shadows in the room. “The hell with the doctor’s orders. I’m opening the curtains.”
“Don’t.”
“You need light and fresh air. The sea breeze smells clean these days.”
“Not like when I first came here, passing out magic fish like a conceited St. Nicholas.” She shook her head angrily as she propped herself upright with the bed pillows.
“You were trying to help,” I said. “You had no way of knowing they’d abandon their normal food. None of my customers stopped eating.”
“No one else lived in the squalor they did. I’d shown them the promise of better things.”
I snorted. “Pearls before swine.Again, not your fault.”
“But it was! I had no right to give them what I gave them.”
“I let you take those fish, remember?”
“I was speaking of hope.” She picked up the rose and examined it. I could see flecks of blood on its white petals. “Despite what you think, I’m not pure. The doctor said it was the miasmas of the docks that brought me low. But he’s wrong. Consumption is a good name for what I have. My sin consumes me from within.”
I laughed without color. “You? Name one sin of yours that would warrant dying.”
“Pride.”
I threw open the curtains. The sunlight howled like a choir of angels, bringing me to my knees as I covered my ears to shut out the sound.
I felt her hand on my shoulder.
“Thank you,” she said, whispering over the din. “I couldn’t face the light by myself.”
“Why not?”
“I can’t give myself permission. I needed you.”
I didn’t have to ask her what she meant. I knew. She was staring out the window at the sea.
“It’s all right,” I said. “No one will hold it against you.”
She kissed my forehead with sticky lips. “I’ll need help.”
Taking the rose from the nightstand, she leaned on me. We tried to walk together, but it was too awkward. I took her into my arms and carried her instead.
Her body weighed nothing, even less than I would have supposed. As I carried her down to the docks, I held her as tightly as I dared. I was worried that she would float away with the wind and the fishes.
If she said anything, I couldn’t hear it for the choir of angels singing wordlessly and unseen. If her words drew themselves in the air, I couldn’t see it for the bright light of the wind.
I held her upright at the end of the dock as she stretched her arms out, facing the surf. The sea spray covered us, soaking through to the skin. Her nightgown stuck wetly to her sides as she fought for breath.
I kissed the back of her head, feeling the fever flow out of me. Then she was still. I released my hold on her, letting her slip into the waves before I could smell the stench of death or see her sightless eyes.
I turned my back on the ocean. The crash of the surf brought no light with it, and the angels were silent.
I live in an empty world. The town stays abandoned. Marianne’s mother left years ago to stay with her daughter and grandchildren. Or perhaps she’s dead. I wouldn’t know.
I haven’t seen the fish since Marianne went. The sky is a large place, so perhaps they are somewhere else. They must be. Angels can’t die.
The fever left me with Marianne. I see without hearing, and listen without light. There is no magic in my world, not anymore.
This morning, the sea was calm, as it had never been before. I took a rowboat out and saw what I knew would be there.
Beneath the surface, there was a shining city, filled with smiling fishermen and their laughing wives. Chubby cheeked children ran through the streets, playing the games that children know and adults have forgotten.
I stood up in the boat for a long time, watching. But I didn’t have the courage to leave my world.
Besides, I didn’t see her there.
As I rowed away, a single white rose floated to the surface next to my boat. Watching it drift over the still water, I felt myself smile for the first time in a long time. Then I turned the boat around and rowed home.
When I close my eyes in my nightly attempts at sleep, I see the rose just as I left it. In all honesty, I prefer the visions to the rose itself. If I’d brought it home, I’d have been forced to watch it die and rot away. Instead, I remember it in all its beauty, perfecting it with the hazy recall time brings.
Keeping it in my memories, I make it an angel.
Colon Cancer - Signs and Warnings
The Colon Cancer Alliance
Colorectal cancer first develops with few, if any, symptoms. It is important not to wait for symptoms before talking to your doctor about getting screened. However, if symptoms are present, they may include:
A change in your bowel habits, including diarrhea or constipation or a change in the consistency of your stool
Feeling that your bowel does not empty completely, rectal bleeding, or finding blood (either bright red or very dark) in your stool
Finding your stools are narrower than usual
Persistent abdominal discomfort, such as cramps, gas, pain, or feeling full or bloated
Losing weight with no known reason
Weakness or fatigue
Having nausea or vomiting
These symptoms can also be associated with many other health conditions. Only your doctor can determine why you're having these symptoms. Usually, early cancer does not cause pain. It is important not to wait to feel pain before seeing a doctor.
When to see a doctor:
If you notice any symptoms of colon cancer, such as blood in your stool or a persistent change in bowel habits, make an appointment with your doctor.
Talk to your doctor about when you should begin screening for colon cancer. Guidelines generally recommend colon cancer screenings begin at age 50. Your doctor may recommend more frequent or earlier screening if you have other risk factors, such as a family history of the disease.
http://ccalliance.org/colorectal_cancer/symptoms.html
About the Editors
JORDAN ELLINGER has been called a “standout” in a starred review in Publishers Weekly. He is a member of SFWA, a first place winner of Writers of the Future, and a graduate of Clarion West. He has collaborated with internationally best-selling authors like Mike Resnick and Steven Savile, is the Executive Producer of Hide and Create, a weekly podcast on writing, and is a professional editor, having worked as Executive Editor at Every Day Publishing and on the Animism Transmedia Campaign. His film, Tender Threads, won the jury prize at Bloodshots Canada and was screened by master of horror, George A. Romero.
Jordan’s website is at: www.jordanellinger.com
RICHARD SALTER is a British writer and editor living near Toronto, Canada. He is editor of the Doctor Who anthology Short Trips: Transmissions and the shared-world apocalyptic mosaic novel World’s Collider. He has two dozen short stories in various anthologies including Solaris Rising and This Is How You Die: Stories of the Inscrutable, Infallible, Inescapable Machine of Death. His debut novel, The Patchwork House, will be released December 9, 2014 by Nightscape Press. He is currently working on a second horror novel and a fantasy trilogy.
See more at www.richardsalter.com
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George R. R. Martin, Fantasy For Good: A Charitable Anthology
Fantasy For Good: A Charitable Anthology Page 43