“My fear is that if we don’t change this, more people are going to start leaving and joining the OC. These aren’t people down on their luck and talent either. Most of the people who make up the OC are people who were in a position of power or have worked for the Ministry. These people are smart and know what they are doing. We can be using them and tapping into their talent if we open the borders. For those of you who are history buffs, you’ve got to know that people start rebelling when they feel trapped, or when they feel like their freedom is being taken away. We can never have a truly flawless plan of action because people are flawed. But we can give safety, security and freedom. I don’t think that’s too much to ask.” I end my long speech with a straight face.
I am getting a few stumped looks, some nods and smiles, and a couple of sighs. This isn’t going as well as I have hoped for and I may just totally make the ship sink with my next comment, but it has to be said.
“I know I’m going to step on a few toes by saying this, but it must be said. I appreciate that you are doing what you think is best for the country, but how would you know how it feels to have your privacy taken away? You are the only people in the whole country who aren’t monitored, or in some way told what to do. You have a freedom that even I will never have, so how can you possibly know how violating it feels to have a mile-long file that’s dedicated to you? I can go into the system at any time and pull a file; any one of you can look at mine whenever you want. You will know how many boyfriends I’ve had, what I like for breakfast, and when I started my period, for God’s sake!”
Peter starts choking and several of the men in the room turn deep shades of red, but it’s completely true and I am not going to hold back.
“Do you think that’s fair that you can know these intimate details about me and I can’t even know your last names? All of your files are hidden or burned, I’m not sure which, but I’m the only one who even knows your faces. How can you judge how people are feeling about their rights being taken away when yours aren’t?”
“I think that’s enough, young lady!” Peter speaks up.
“She isn’t wrong,” Amira interjects.
“No, in fact she is very right, and I’ve never thought of that, Roz. I never thought of how intrusive it is, just that it is needed,” Samuel adds.
“I think you are right; it is needed, but it doesn’t hurt to let people know, and maybe not be as intrusive.” I reply.
Clarisse pipes up: “I feel like I’m almost repeating myself from what I said earlier, but this is a ginormous undertaking. You are talking about not only changing our whole system, but reframing how the whole country is run. It’s going to take a long time and there is going to be a lot of fall back from this. I don’t see how it can be done smoothly. It’s one thing to build from the ashes, but you are talking about tearing down and rebuilding.”
Many nods follow her statement.
“You are right. It is going to be a long and hard process, but I feel like it will be completely worth it in the end. Hard work is rewarding. I don’t think we shouldn’t do what is right just because it’s going to be a pain to do it. We will just have to be organized. Select people to do what they are good at and delegate; it doesn’t have to be done all at one time, but slowly bring about another change. If we are united on this, it will not be half as hard. I know I’m asking a lot, but I know we can do this.”
“Does anyone have any other questions or statements before we take a vote?” Samuel asks.
“I do,” Lucas says. “Who is going to be overseeing these changes and places? You? Don’t you think it’s going to be hard to focus 100% on two completely split communities?”
Well crap, I haven’t thought of that, but then Malik and Dex flash in my mind.
“As President of United America, my first goal is to unite the people. Once I do that, my leadership and loyalty is always going to be to the Ministry, but with that being said, I will not ignore the OC. I am the President of all, but I think we will need to elect someone from there who knows how to lead and represent that area to better fuse the two places together. They will still have to answer to the Council and I think it will even be beneficial for them to have one person stationed here at the Ministry as a representative, and one there, among the people.”
“That sounds very reasonable.” Annabelle adds. Thank God for that because I have no clue where I have pulled that from.
“Shall we vote?” Peter asks. Everyone nods.
“I will start,” He says. “Roz, I’m not saying I don’t agree with you. You are a very smart girl who loves people and does right by them. I think this is a good plan you’ve showed us, but I just can’t vote in favor of it. I’m old and I’m set in my ways and I don’t have the energy to put forth what it will take to get it done, but that doesn’t mean I don’t think you can. I just think at this time it’s too much. I vote no.”
Seamus was next. “I agree with Peter, Roz, I’m sorry. It is a good plan, but it’s too much without being really thought out. I think it’s something we can bring back to review at a later date for sure.” I nod to him. I can feel my eyes start to tear up. I know I still have eight more votes, but it is hard not to feel defeated already.
Samuel looks up at me and smiles wide. “I vote absolutely yes. Roz has vision and every ounce of spirit and heart to back that vision up.” I mouth thanks to Samuel who winks.
Next is Lucas. “I agree with Samuel. My vote is yes.”
Annabelle just smiles and nods. “Absolutely. I may be old, but I know when to back up and let the new blood do the work.”
That is more in my favor now; maybe I can just pull this off after all.
Clarisse only says “No” and nothing else. That woman is going on my list.
Patience says, “Yes, we can make this work.”
“Absolutely we can, yes.” Amira gives me a wink.
This is much too close for my liking. My palms are starting to sweat and I feel like I am going to pass out at any minute.
Simon looks at me with regret in his eyes. “I’m so sorry, Roz. I really want to say yes, but I think it is much too big of an undertaking right now. Baby steps, Roz; if you bite off more than you can chew, you will choke. No for me.”
I can’t believe this. The final vote and my fate literally lie in Nadine’s hands. I’ve hardly heard anything out of this woman the whole time I’ve been in the Ministry, and now my fate is in her hands. Why haven’t I gotten a better idea of where she stands? She is so shy that I never even thought about her before. She is also the youngest member of the Council and neither Malik nor Dex has mentioned her so she must have replaced Ed. She looks at me now with compassion in her eyes. I’m hoping that’s a good sign.
“Roz, you are a breath of fresh air to the Ministry. You are a proven fact that age doesn’t mean you can’t handle responsibility. I have no doubt that you will be able to fulfill your promises, but what concerns me is the split in the Council. Splits are known to happen, but I think a vote for something this important should be closer than me being the final vote. I don’t feel comfortable passing this without more support; however, I think you are on the right path so I’m going to break this up. I vote yes for lifting the ban, but not on the rest. You can lift the ban, but we need more time to make such a huge change to our country.”
What has just happened? People are all talking at once but all I hear is noise. She says no, but she lifts the ban? So it isn’t a total loss, but that still means hiding things from the people. What do I do now? Do I step down and join the OC? I never thought for a second that they would pass only half of my plan; I am not prepared for this. I have tears streaming down my face and I can hardly breathe. Do I step down? I can’t make such a drastic decision in a heartbeat like this. I just can’t. All of a sudden, I realize the noise has completely died down. I have ten faces looking at me, all in concern. Somehow Amira, Samuel and Annabelle have surrounded me and I haven’t even noticed them move.
“Roz, you
are scaring us, honey. Please say something,” Annabelle says to me.
This is too much, I just can’t process this all. I am literally shutting down and I don’t want to process or do anything in front of the entire Council. I place my head in my hands and try to catch my breath and make everything stop spinning. I will not decide anything right now. I think the Council takes my silence as me giving up, or stepping down because shouting immediately starts happening. Samuel is downright screaming and Peter is trying to match him word for word. I can’t really tell what they are saying but I think I hear Samuel threaten to step down and it has caused a huge outburst. That can’t happen, I don’t want to cause more division. I raise my hand for silence. It has taken a while for people to notice, but Amira finally yells, “Will both of you shut up and sit down! Give the poor girl a chance to process this. Roz, what is it, honey?”
I look up at them. I’m sure my face is pale and I am not feeling well at all, but I am going to say this and then leave and go lock myself away where I can process everything.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cause more problems, I just…I don’t know what to do now. I’m thankful that the ban is lifted, but just solving half a problem isn’t going to help, so to be honest, I’m not sure what to do. I’m going to take some time to think about this. It means the ban is lifted, right? But because the vote is split, does that mean the other part didn’t pass?”
Samuel shakes his head. “No, it means it’s tabled. We will have another vote later and it will continue to be tabled until it is no longer split.” Here it goes; this is where I ask for other Council members, but after the blow up from earlier, should I risk it? Maybe I can go slightly around it.
“Tabled? That’s it? There is no other contingency? No other members or board can be brought in to break a tie vote?” That is as close as I am going to get, and it looks like it does the trick. Amira instantly starts to cry. Crap, I don’t want that.
Samuel stares at me for a moment like he is seeing more than I want him to. Then he slowly shakes his head no. “It’s tabled, Roz. Take as long as you need to get your head on straight, and then we have to move forward.” He knows I know about Ed, I know it. He is now looking at me hard, almost mad, but quiet. How can he know when nobody else is tipped off by my question? I nod at him and I stand up and walk out. It’s done. Before I make it out of the hallway, Amira has her hand on my shoulder. I can hear Samuel yelling something for her to come back but he doesn’t follow.
She hugs me. “Please don’t step down, Roz, please. We will make the changes happen. If it really means that much to you, there is a way, but it’s going to make Samuel very angry; he might step down if I do it. Please think very hard on this, I will leave the choice up to you. I will be in touch.” She runs off before I can ask any questions.
If I was not confused before, I sure as heck am now. What can Amira do that can make Samuel angry enough to quit the Council? The only thing I can think of that she can do is to bring Ed back, but why will that make Samuel mad and make him leave?
Chapter Twelve
I need to message Masters and then talk to Malik. I send him a quick message to meet me in my office. I go straight to my office and tell Judy to hold all calls and visitors minus Masters. Once I say even Wes and Molly aren’t to disturb me, Judy looks at me like I have lost my mind. Wes and Molly are on the may-enter-at-any-time list, but today, it is different. I don’t wait for her reply and shut the door, then lay down on the couch. My head barely hits the cushion before Masters comes charging into the office. He must have been close by like he said he would be. He rushes over to me and takes in the state I am in and kneels down by the couch.
“I take it that it didn’t go your way?” he asks carefully.
I just shake my head and continue to cry. He lifts my head and sits down on the couch; putting a pillow from the couch on his lap and laying my head back down on the pillow. He rubs my hair and doesn’t say anything for a while. If I wasn’t so upset, I would think that this is funny. Out of everyone Masters is the only one I wanted for comfort. The idea seemed hilarious, but it was true. He doesn’t know what has happened but I can't bring myself to think of it right now. Masters gets up after a while and turns some music on, and then he begins to search my drawers for something, finally coming out with a pack of post-it notes. He starts walking around the room, placing the post its in random places; I think this odd enough to stop my tears and watch him with curiosity. It is then that I realize what he is doing: he is covering up all cameras. I assume I am monitored at all times, but I have never given it much thought. I wonder how much trouble he can get into for doing this. He goes to the fridge and takes out a few bottles of water and chocolate milk and brings them back to where I am. I take a few sips of water until I can get myself under control.
I then bring him up to speed about everything that has happened and I end it with the weird message from Amira.
He sits there completely still and silent for a few minutes, probably trying to process it all. I completely understand since I am having a hard time myself.
“So the ban is up? The gate is going to be unlocked?” he inquires.
“That’s what they said. I think that’s more your department though; that means you are not going to need to guard it any longer and you can get the IT guys to unlock the gate. I guess at least something positive came from this.”
Masters just sits there, not saying anything.
“What? You are making me nervous, what are you thinking?”
“Oh it’s nothing, just processing it all. I don’t think this is a bad thing, Roz. It’s not what you wanted, but sometimes it just takes a little hard work and time. This isn’t a movie where the heroine gets what she wants, saves the world and that’s the end. It takes commitment and dedication. Stick with it and I think you will be surprised how fast you can change the Council’s mind.”
He is right and I know it, but it is just a bit disappointing anyway.
“It’s time to go tell Malik in person, don’t you think?”
“Is that just another excuse for you to see Dex? You just saw him this morning, girl.” He is only teasing me, trying to lighten the mood, but I can’t take it, not right now when nothing else in my life makes sense either.
I drop my head so he can’t see my tears and shake my head no. “I meant you. I’m going to stay here. But I think Malik needs a heads up in person. You can fill him in on everything.”
He lifts my chin and levels my gaze to his. “Why the tears, little one? This is more than today’s outcome.”
“I’m fine, Masters. I just don’t feel like talking anymore. I’m going to go home and try to make all the pieces fit. Would you mind going out there today and talking to Malik please?”
“Sure thing, Roz.” He leans over and gives me a big hug, and then whispers in my ear, “Men are stupid, but sooner or later, we usually always come to our senses. Things will work out, don’t you worry.”
I just nod my head and hug him back. “Thanks, Masters.”
“Do you want me to send Natasha over?”
“No, thank you. I’d rather be alone tonight. In fact, I’m going to ask if Andi would mind putting Molly and Wes up for a few days.”
“I’ll talk to Andi and arrange it before I head out to the OC. You just go take some time for yourself; I think you can use it. I’ll try to keep Natasha at bay, but eventually she’s going to want to come see you and make sure you are alright. She’s like a momma bear when it comes to you.” I have amazing friends. I am not shutting them out; I just need to figure out what I want to do. I nod and he leaves. I wait a little bit longer until I am sure that I am fine and that I will not have any more meltdowns once I leave the protection of my office. I brush myself off and go into Judy’s office. Poor thing looks very worried.
“Hi, Judy, sorry about earlier. Please don’t worry, everything is fine. To be honest, I’m just totally exhausted and I have a lot on my mind. I have a few things to work out
before I can come back to work, so please hold all my calls and everything for me. I’m going to take a few days out of the office and will be back later this week.”
“Roz, are you sure you’re alright?” She looks at me so sweetly with grandmotherly worry I almost lost it again.
“I’m fine, and you called me Roz, thank you.” She blushes a little but nods her head.
“Okay, I’m out of here then. I will be seeing you later on. I’m going to keep everything turned off, but will be at home if you need me. Please get a message to Miriam if you can and let her know she will have the next few days off as well.”
“Are you sure about that? It might be good to have someone take care of you for a few days.”
“I’m fine, Judy, really. Please let her know too. Thanks.” I turn around and get out of the building and make my way home as quickly as I can. Once I get there, I run a hot bath and soak in for almost an hour. Then I crawl into bed and fall fast asleep.
Divided (The United Trilogy Book 2) Page 16