When the plane touched down, she was startled, having fallen asleep. She texted Patrick, and he promised to meet her by baggage claim. Quickly, she gathered her things and made her way down the aisle to the terminal. She had no checked luggage, but Patrick was there with a warm smile, looking way more handsome and refined than he had a right to. In his left hand, he held a dozen red roses.
While not the expected greeting, it was exactly what her heart had dared to hope for.
He’d been nervous about seeing her. The flowers were more for his benefit than hers, trying to make a bold statement to give himself courage. He knew they had to have that talk. He wanted to explain things to her and do it right. He hoped to God, and even asked Ryan for his help, so he would get it right.
“Hey, beautiful,” he said while she approached him with her fresh looks. Her round brown eyes sparkled, her lashes demurely downcast. He enjoyed that she was embarrassed. She wasn’t like any of the women he’d told himself he needed. His anonymous sexual partners were strung together like tangled netting in the box, all knotted up sometimes, running into each other. Stephanie was the model by which he had judged all other women. It had been that way for years, but he’d just figured it out. And now she was standing in front of him.
She looked down at the roses, sniffed them, and smiled. “Nice.” He could see she was anxious. She kept looking at the flowers, and then his feet, and his fingers holding the flowers, but she wasn’t looking into his eyes.
“Come here, Stephanie,” he whispered.
She quickly darted a look to his face, and that’s when he was overcome. He grabbed her, pulling her close to him, and holding her to his body, then kissed her hard. He didn’t want anything misunderstood. The flowers said one thing. His kiss was going to tell her something else.
At first, she was stiff, but then she eased into it, and, at last, melted. He felt her heart racing, loved the muffled moans she gave him while he plunged deep inside her mouth. Cradling her head under his chin, he hugged her. “I’ve been an idiot, Stephanie.”
She nodded slightly in agreement, which sent his heart soaring. She pulled away and drilled him with a look. “I think we both have.”
“Fair enough.” He extended the roses to her, taking her carryon and slipping his arm around her waist as they made their way through crowds of passengers. He watched as she buried her nose in the bouquet. It would have felt even better if she’d leaned into him. But he was going to work on his patience.
“Hope you’re hungry,” he said.
“Actually, starved. I didn’t eat all day.”
“That apprehensive?” He looked down at her, but she didn’t return his gaze.
Her lack of response was bothering him.
They drove to the marina near the convention center. Helping her out of the car, he took her hand to lead her to the restaurant that had been recommended. “I’m just getting my bearings. Visited Ryan down here once, but I wasn’t in any condition to remember a thing.”
She said nothing, but stared straight ahead with an unreadable expression. So, he kept talking.
“Ryan had just made it through BUD/S and, man, was he sore. He was bleeding in places I didn’t know men bled. His feet were green from wearing those boots and socks for five days straight. We got a room down right there,” he pointed to the multistoried hotel overlooking the marina, “and I had to practically force him to take a shower. He was falling asleep while he took his clothes off. I thought he’d fall asleep in the shower and drown.”
“I remember him telling me about that. His parents were so proud he’d made it through.”
“I think they’d cut about two thirds of the class by that time. You wouldn’t have wanted to see him. He was a mess.”
“Surprised he wanted to party.”
“Not that night. We put a movie on the TV, and I don’t think he stayed awake long enough to get through the opening credits. I let him sleep. We partied long and hard the next day and night, though.”
The restaurant was right where he’d been told, overlooking the twinkling water and boats at the marina. Ushered to their table, he asked if she wanted wine, and she declined. She declined a beer, too, but he ordered one.
“Ryan—”
She stopped him by covering his hand on the table. “Patrick, why are we talking about Ryan?”
He’d rehearsed what he wanted to say so many times he’d forgotten his lines. Over-preparation, like on the field. Mentally preparing for one style of play and having the opposing team go at it a completely different way. Games were lost when the opponent got inside your head. Stephanie was getting inside his head big time.
“I’m sorry.”
“You sure do spend a lot of time telling me you’re sorry. I’m getting double messages here, Patrick.”
He was totally confused. This is the part of being with a woman that frustrated him, had been the sole reason he’d never hooked up with anyone for more than a couple of dates. Women were so confusing, so difficult to read. When he was defending the box, he could tell which foot the forward was going to use every time, but he didn’t have a clue what was going on with Stephanie. He began to think having her come down to San Diego had been a colossal mistake.
“Try just telling me the truth, Patrick.” Her sweet voice washed over him, and it steadied his nerves.
“I’m leaving soccer to try out for the SEAL teams, Stephanie. I’ve done some research on what it would take, no guarantees. But I want to give it a try.”
“What? You had me fly down here to tell me this?”
“Not entirely.”
“There’s more?”
“Yes. I wanted to explain my decision.”
“Okay. We could have done this by phone.”
No way, ma’am. He had a goal to achieve tonight. It had nothing to do with scoring, either. It had everything to do with laying a firm foundation for something bigger than that.
“Wanted to tell you in person.”
“Okay.”
“I love playing soccer. I love the money. I love my teammates. And yes, I enjoyed the girls.” He searched her eyes but didn’t find judgment there. “Steph, there have been lots of girls. I need you to know that.”
“Okay. What makes you think you’re the only one?”
He hesitated for a second before he saw her smile. “Don’t look at me that way, Patrick. Ryan was only my second.”
He blushed in spite of himself. He still didn’t feel at ease with her, although she was encouraging him. Or at least she wasn’t rejecting him.
“I wanted to make sure you were okay with my decision.”
She leaned back in her chair, arms crossed. “So where is this going?”
“None of that past matters to me. Point is, coming home has changed me. I didn’t expect I would ever want to give up soccer, and now I do. I can see it. I want to do something else with my life. Make a difference somehow.”
“Okay. You want my blessing, is that it?” She kept her arms crossed.
“Yes. It’s important to me.”
She leaned forward, placing her chin on her folded fingers, her elbows on the table. “Tell me why, Patrick.” Her eyes didn’t flinch.
This was the do-or-die moment for him. He hoped he’d given it enough explanation that she’d feel comfortable with what he’d been rehearsing all afternoon.
“I want to see if we can work something out together, Steph. What I’m saying is that I want to try. We’ll take it slow, but that’s what I want, and I want to be honest with you about all of this. You also need to understand I want to become a SEAL, too. If I don’t make a team, I’ll be in the Navy. There’s no buyout of a contract clause in the enlistment. There’s no guarantee I won’t become a cook on a carrier, although I can’t cook, so that’s probably a long shot. I could be a—”
“Patrick, would you look at me?”
That’s when he realized he’d been looking everywhere else but at her. He couldn’t tell if she was angry or j
ust confused. “Look, Stephanie, we know each other. I mean we know more about each other than most married couples, I think. I know we haven’t spent much time around each other for several years, but once you know someone that well, I think you always know them. We’d be perfect together. We have the—”
“Patrick, shut up.”
He didn’t notice she’d interrupted him. Her steady brown eyes gazed back at him, and she was smiling. Finally, she was smiling. He angled his head to make sure he’d heard her right.
“I’ll give it a try,” she whispered, taking his hand.
“Tomorrow, I go over and check things out. I wanted you there, too. Next, I have to go back formally buy out my contract.”
“Will that be a problem?”
“They’ve always got talent stacked up, so they’ve got two perfectly good keepers they’ve been grooming. I think the club will actually benefit financially if I leave.” He watched their fingers entwine on the tabletop. “I wanted to be sure you were okay with my decision. I thought you could get your questions answered, and there are some people you could talk to—”
“Do you think Ryan and I ever talked about this?”
“Right.” Of course, they had. What was he thinking?
“So what’s your schedule like, do you have any idea?”
“It’ll take a few weeks to get processed and released from the Tottenham team. I sign up at the Recruitment Center, and it all depends on when they have a spot. They might want me to ship out the next day, which I cannot do until I’m released. More than likely, it’s hurry up and wait. Not like the published schedules they do for Tottenham.”
“So when would you move out here?” she asked as her eyes showed that coyness he loved, snagging his heart.
“How about tomorrow? We could find a place to rent. I could try to get out here a few days here and there.”
She giggled at that. “Never in a million years did it occur to me that this morning I’d be thinking about moving here.” Then she frowned.
“I’d like to start looking for a place right away, if that’s agreeable.”
“You worried I’ll change my mind?”
“I don’t want to let you get away.”
“I’ve always been here, Patrick. I think that’s why this keeps moving so fast. I promised myself I wouldn’t do that, but here I am.”
“Yes. Here you are. It feels right, Stephanie. You could come back with me to England. We get the release and travel a bit around Europe, have a little time to ourselves. And then we get serious with the Navy.”
“I’d have to help them find a replacement for the upcoming school year, but then I could go. That actually sounds like fun.”
“Okay. You join me in, what, a couple of weeks?”
“Here or in London?”
“Why not? You ever see London during the holidays? It’s outstanding.” He pulled her fingers to his lips.
Holy shit. She actually said yes.
The waiter came to take their order. They gazed at each other. The standoff soon got smoldering, while her beautiful eyes softened and the crease at the right side of her mouth dimpled as her lips curled up into a sultry smile that could only mean one thing.
Without taking his eyes off of her, he said, “I think we’re going to have dessert first.” She tilted her head and saluted him with her water glass. Finally, they were on the same page. The waiter mumbled something about going to get the dessert menu, and she stopped him.
“I’m sorry, but we’re going to have dessert somewhere else. But thanks.” She didn’t look at the waiter, either, even though the young man tried to get their attention.
Their attention was riveted elsewhere.
Chapter 11
Patrick had booked a room overlooking the water at a nearby hotel. Their view of the moonlight on the harbor was like a movie set. Without turning on the lights, they dropped their bags and walked to the window. His arms went around her waist. Stephanie felt comfortable, settled, even though things were moving at lightning speed, like surf swallowing up a huge hole left in the sand. Her vacant insides needed to be filled with life and hope for a beautiful tomorrow.
She wondered what Ryan would think and concluded he would approve. If he couldn’t be there, he would choose Patrick—not to take his place, but to care for Stephanie—because he knew he could always count on his best friend, and because he also knew she had always carried a torch for him.
It would be difficult being alone again after Patrick left for England, but it was an important opportunity to start putting the past to rest. She didn’t want to erase those wonderful memories of Ryan, memories she’d always have. But it would be painful to remain in the town where she and Ryan had fallen in love, to see all the places they used to go, meet people they’d talked to as a couple. It seemed healthy for her to start fresh in another location, in a country she’d never been to, with someone she had always loved and trusted showing her the way.
“Your thoughts?” he whispered in her ear.
“Just was wondering what it would be like to visit England. Never been anywhere outside the country.”
“You’ll love it. Can’t wait to show you.” He began kissing her neck.
“Everything’s gone so fast.”
“Yes. It has.” He held her chin up leading her lips to his. “And it’s been twenty some years in the making too. That doesn’t seem so fast, does it?”
She gulped in air at the thrilling possibilities for an evening of lovemaking, of having Patrick’s hands on her body for the first time.
“Hey, you okay with everything? Truth. Tell me the truth.”
“I’m fine tonight and will be fine tomorrow. When you go back to England, that’s when I’ll fall apart.”
“But not tonight. Are you sure about being okay with my decision?”
She liked that he didn’t want to take advantage. “As long as you’re okay with it. What if you don’t make the Teams?”
“Most people don’t. But I have an inside track, Steph.”
“Really? What is it?”
“Ryan. He told me the secret.”
“You’re kidding. Tell me.”
“I think he meant more than just trying out for the Teams. He meant it about life in general. He said the secret was never to quit. At anything.”
That was like him, she thought. That’s why her going on with her life was the right thing to do, even though perhaps there would be a bumpy road ahead.
He waited for her to kiss him, though she could feel the lodge pole in his pants. She loved that he wanted to be careful with her, even though there was no doubt as to the evening’s trajectory.
After their kiss, and without saying a word, he led her solemnly to the bed.
His hands were deliberate and sure. Slowly, he unpeeled her clothing, kissing her down the back of her spine, sliding his long fingers down her belly to the juncture between her legs. She held his hand and moved her sex onto his palm, giving herself to him. The hitch in his breath told her everything she needed to know. He’d never been shy around women, so this was so special.
With gentle motions, he touched her with respect. His hand guided their relationship further, down a path that would forever alter and obliterate the space between them.
She could hear the sounds of foghorns in the distance and a bell somewhere farther down the beach. Was that someone quitting a BUD/S class? She knew she wouldn’t quit. Patrick’s long, powerful thighs urged her toward the bed, and she heard the bell again.
He turned her, pulling her back into his chest and gently squeezing her breast with their joined hands. With the other, he moved aside her long hair and kissed her neck. Their bodies swayed to a silent lover’s rhythm. His upper torso completely and warmly protected her back.
He was aching for her, but aching more to know if she could feel the magic he felt.
His fingers slipped up her neck and into her hair as he pressed his forehead against her scalp. He allowed her to hear his
heavy breathing, allowed her to feel his erection now reaching the waistband of his slacks. She permitted his left hand to smooth their way down her firm abdomen, giving him full access to breach the top of her skirt. She separated her legs and arched back into him so deliciously. His fingers easily found the wetness in her juncture. She was willing and open to him in ways he’d never felt before. He knew her desire for him was rising by the second, matching his own.
“God, Stephanie. I—”
She’d whispered soothing words to him that tingled and reverberated inside his head like tiny diamond crystals. She melted further into his arms.
His kiss and need to see her expression were crucial. He read her as he closed his mouth over hers, as they lazily played with each other’s tongues. He inhaled at the warm feeling of her fingers exploring his abdomen, sliding up and under his shirt, her palms to his naked skin, her arms now wrapped around his neck, her knees spread to the sides so she could rub herself against his thigh, ride his thigh when he raised it, lifting her and allowing her legs to nearly dangle so the full weight of her body could ride him there.
Open your eyes, Stephanie. Look at me. I am real. I am alive and in your arms. Is this what you want? He needed to know it was his body she loved, his body she craved, his mouth she wanted to feel tasting her. When he lifted her chin to him again and brushed her cheeks with his thumbs she did open her eyes.
“Oh, Patrick. I’ve always loved you. Help me to heal.”
Of course he could be that guy. Of course he wanted to help her. If afterwards the unthinkable happened and they couldn’t make things work, he’d have to be okay with that, because right now, it was about Stephanie. And he knew he was the only man who would be able to take away at least part of her pain. Not all of it, but enough for now.
“Are you sure that is okay with you? Just want to be sure you are—”
“I need to feel you inside me, Patrick.”
SEAL's Rescue Page 18