by Robin Roseau
They'd been exceedingly casual with our nudity. We hadn't gotten a hard time about anything except sleeping in late. And Elisabeth had been casual with her own nudity with me.
No, I didn't think that sort of privacy was anyone's top concern.
What was with all the showers? Did I smell that bad. I imagined her sense of smell was better than mine, at least as a wolf. What about as human? Was she human? If not, what should I call her?
I had a lot of questions and very few answers.
It took a long time to get to sleep Sunday night.
* * * *
I slept poorly Sunday night and woke with disquietude. I spent the morning going through the photos from the weekend, trying to shake the mood. But the photos only reminded me of Elisabeth. About eleven, I sent her a text.
"Missing you."
I received a reply a few minutes later. "In meetings." That didn't help, but twenty minutes later, "Me, too" arrived, and that helped, a little anyway.
I hoped she would call me, but when I didn't hear from her by late afternoon, I sent, "Any chance I could hear your voice?"
"On duty until late," was the reply. "I'll call if I get a chance, but I need to focus. Sorry."
Well, she had a job, and it was important.
I thought about that for a while. I knew I didn't have the entire story about, well, anything. But I thought about Michaela being kidnapped. I was pretty sure it wasn't by a business competitor or someone angry with Lara's business practices. Was the petite woman some sort of prize caught in the middle of a werewolf tug of war? Elisabeth had said Michaela resented her protection detail. Was it protection, or was she some sort of prisoner?
I thought about Portia and Karen's story, about Karen being hired to prevent a businessman's daughter from running away. I wondered if Michaela's protection detail served the same purpose.
She hadn't acted like a prisoner. She had acted like she owned the place. And her affection for Lara and the others was clear.
Why was everyone else so big, but Michaela was so small?
Lara doted on her, and I could tell Elisabeth loved her, too. The affection from several of the others was clear, especially Angel and Scarlett. All of them had taken orders from her, even Lara, although it had felt like Lara held the real power. Were they just humoring her?
But it was clear that Bayfield had been her home, and it seemed like they were bending their lives to her wishes.
I didn't understand.
Was it exactly as it seemed? Michaela was Lara's willing, exuberant wife? That was the simplest answer, but it still seemed like I was missing something important.
Everyone had repeatedly used the word "clan". But they had hesitated over the word before using it, nearly every time. Were they dancing around a different word they normally used?
Like "pack"?
I was sure of that.
Michaela had been estranged from Lara for a while and had gone somewhere else. She'd acted as a bodyguard. She was tiny. How could she possibly have been a bodyguard, especially for someone famous like Suzette? Was it just a story? Everyone had acted like they believed her, but maybe it was just a story. Lara had said the stories they told were occasionally fabrications.
Well, that might be something I could check. I fired up the web browser and began doing searches on Suzette. There were thousands of hits, thousands and thousands. But Michaela had said something... They'd gone to Washington DC. Something about a baby picture.
So I searched for Suzette, Washington, and baby. And I found references to a Facebook post. It took a while, but finally I was staring at a picture. "Suzette holding Daphne at the Vietnam War Memorial. We weren't sure it was her, as there weren't any obvious bodyguards with her, just another woman."
I was sure that other women had been Michaela, although there weren't any photos of her.
My phone rang. It was Elisabeth!
"Hi!" I said.
"I just have a minute or two," she said. "What are you doing?"
"Honestly?"
"Always."
"It's a little embarrassing."
"Just tell me."
"I'm looking up Suzette on the web."
"Why is that embarrassing?"
"Michaela's story," I said. "I found a photo of Suzette with a baby. I was curious. Is that dumb?"
"No." Elisabeth paused. "Zoe, she was offering you a great deal of trust telling that story in front of you. You can't ever tell anyone."
"I think on some level I knew that," I replied. "Although I hadn't actually thought about it. Elisabeth, how could Michaela be a bodyguard?"
"She wasn't the only one. In a way, she was sort of a beard."
"What do you mean?"
"No bodyguard in sight, just this tiny woman. That can't possibly be a major star like Suzette. You see?"
"Sure."
"That being said, Michaela could kick the ass of most black belts."
"Shit. Seriously?"
"Oh yeah. She's small, but she's very, very fast. And all that kayaking has given her tiny body some pretty impressive muscles. She's very strong for her size. She and I spar."
"What?"
"She's fragile, and I have to be careful, but she's faster than I am. Hand-to-hand, she can't really hurt me, but if she has a weapon, she does a whole lot better."
"Guns, the great field leveler?"
"She prefers knives."
"I-" I thought about it. "How much is 'a whole lot better', Elisabeth?"
"She beats me, Zoe. Not every time, but more than her fair share. It's actually rather embarrassing."
"Oh shit," I said. I was using that word a lot lately. I needed to find a better expression.
"We don't talk about this outside the clan, Zoe."
"Of course," I replied. "Thank you for trusting me, Elisabeth. It means a lot to me. I know we just spent the weekend together, but I really would like to see you."
"I'm sorry," she said. "Not today. You understand, I can't share details about my job."
"You can trust me, but I understand."
"We're spread thinly this week. I would like my company to have another six or eight employees, but they're hard to find."
"Why?"
"It's not that hard to find employees, but it's very, very difficult to find people who I know can't be bought."
"Oh," I said. I thought about that. "I think I understand."
"So, we're spread thinly. Both Michaela and Lara have business meetings this week. I have people watching my nieces. I have people with Michaela. I'm with Lara. And at the same time, we're investigating a corporate espionage incident, so I have employees monitoring that. And all that is more than I should be telling you, especially over the public cell phone system."
I was touched she trusted me.
"So I shouldn't take it personally that you can't see me."
"Right."
We talked for a few more minutes before she said, "I'm sorry. I have to go. Remember -- no posting follow ups to that Facebook post you found."
"How did you know it was a Facebook post?"
"I am very good at my job, Zoe. I know exactly what picture you found."
"Oh, of course. Will you get another break?"
"If I do, I'll call, but don't wait up."
"I miss you, Elisabeth."
* * * *
While Monday's phone call helped, I still woke up crabby Tuesday morning.
My relationship with Elisabeth, if relationship was even the right word, was based on secrets. She was keeping secrets from me, important secrets. But I was keeping some from her, too. And the longer it went on, the worse it was going to get.
I thought about destroying the evidence. I'd set up the cameras to keep track of what was going on with that eagle's nest that Lara had talked about. I'd planned on collecting information of anyone harassing the eagles -- it was illegal, after all. But instead, I'd gotten footage of Elisabeth. I'd left the cameras in place, but their batteries were long expired. I s
hould go collect them, see what was on them, then decide what to do.
But Lara said they had surveillance. The cameras were across the road; I hadn't trespassed on their property. But what if they had cameras that caught me? Before, maybe no one would notice, and they wouldn't have had any particular reason to pay attention to me. But what if Elisabeth were watching her cameras as I drove up to take my cameras down?
No. I'd leave the cameras where they were for now, or maybe send someone else to get them.
But could I do that? What if that person got caught instead? That could be even worse.
But if I could destroy all the videos and all the pictures I had taken, if I erased every single copy, then it was like it never happened, right? I never would need to tell Elisabeth I had spied on her, and maybe someday she would trust me enough to tell me about herself.
Except it had happened. I knew her secret. And after the way I'd reacted on our date in the park, I knew I would eventually screw up, letting her know I knew. And then she would want to know how.
I didn't know what to do, and I was in a foul mood because of it.
It was rare I didn't know what to do. It was even more rare I found myself facing a moral quandary.
I showered and was still in a foul mood. I remembered what she'd done to me in that shower.
I really, really wanted her to do it again.
I sent Elisabeth a text. "Thinking of you." A smiley face came back twenty minutes later.
I decided I needed to direct my frustration in a fruitful fashion. I drafted a sample letter to the editor along the lines of, "The Koch Brothers are evil and must be stopped." Oh, it was somewhat more elegant than that, but clear and simple. I checked the GreEN budget and decided I could afford a mailing.
I produced five hundred copies and then spent hours signing each one in a purple pen, leaving a personal note for those people I knew well enough. Then, while I was at it, I drafted a "Thank you" note to Lara and Michaela. I mailed everything, sending the thank you to the address from Elisabeth's business card. I figured it would get routed properly somehow.
* * * *
We didn't talk Tuesday.
Or Wednesday.
Thursday afternoon, I tried working with my photos. I was a good photographer, but good photographers weren't that uncommon, and I didn't have the brilliance of someone like Rodney Lough, nor did I have the equipment he had or the travel budget. Keeping myself fed required attention to my photographs.
But I repeatedly found myself staring at some of my images of Elisabeth.
"What am I going to do?" I finally asked aloud. "Can I walk away from you? Can I walk away from what I know?"
I got up and prowled around my little apartment.
What would she do when I told her? What if she was angry? What if she... She'd told me she was protective of their secrets. What would they do to me, if they knew I knew?
I stared out the window leaning my head against. "Would you kill me, Elisabeth?" I asked. "Should I take precautions?"
But I thought about it. And thought about it. And thought about it.
"Trust starts somewhere," I said. "And I don't want to wait."
Picked up my phone. "Please call me. We have to talk."
Secrets
The wait was agonizing, as short as it was. My phone rang.
"Elisabeth."
"Hello, Zoe. Are you all right?"
"No."
"Tell me what's wrong."
"Not over the phone," I said. "I need to see you. It can't wait. I know you're busy. I'm sorry."
"Have you done anything that can't be undone?"
I thought about it. "I might not like the solution, but no. I haven't done anything that can't be undone."
"Then we'll work it out," she said. "Calm down."
I was pacing back and forth. "I can't," I said. "I'm so afraid you're going to be angry."
"Did you post pictures of my friends on the internet?"
"What? No. Of course not. I wouldn't do something like that, at least not without permission. Well, unless I caught you dumping toxic waste into Lake Superior. You're not dumping toxic waste, are you, Elisabeth?"
She laughed, but it felt forced. "No. Do you need me to come there?"
"No," I said. "I don't think we should do this here. We're going to want more privacy. May I come there?"
"I can send someone to get you."
"Please, Elisabeth, can I just talk to you before I face anyone else?"
"All right. I'm with Lara right now, but we're at home. You can come here."
"Will it be all right? Do you have to ask her?"
"It will be fine," she said. "It's complicated getting here. I'll give you partial directions, but someone is going to need to meet you." She told me where to drive. "Do you have a hands free headset for your phone?"
"Yes."
"When you get there, call me."
"Elisabeth?"
"Yes, Zoe?"
"I-" I paused. I didn't know what to tell her. "They won't hurt me, will they?"
"Who won't hurt you?"
"Whoever you're sending."
"No, of course not. The roads here aren't marked, that's all. They'll bring you to my house."
"All right. I'm leaving now. Well, in a few minutes."
"I'll see you in forty minutes or so, then," she replied.
We hung up. I looked around my apartment for a minute, then I packed my computer in my bag. I found the photos of Elisabeth and the prints I had made, and I packed them, too.
I had another copy of the video, but I didn't want to take the time to get it.
Five minutes later, I was in my car.
* * * *
I called her.
"Hello, Zoe."
"I pulled off the highway and I'm on that dirt road you mentioned."
"Stay on that road," she said. "You're using a headset, right?"
"Yes."
"Stay calm. Two hands on the wheel. There's no need to speed."
"I'm a careful driver," I replied.
"There are a lot of deer in the area," she said. "Drive more slowly than you might normally."
I slowed down. Then ahead I saw a car approaching.
"There's someone coming the other way."
"I need you to come to a stop right where you are, Zoe."
"I'm scared, Elisabeth."
"Don't be. Just come to a stop right in the road. That's Karen and Portia. They're going to turn around behind you, then Karen is going to get in the car with you."
"Please, Elisabeth..."
"She's bringing you here, Zoe. That's all."
I came to a stop, and then the other vehicle slowed down. It was an SUV, and I saw two people in it. As it drew closer, I recognized Portia behind the wheel and Karen in the passenger seat. They came to a stop next to me, and Portia lowered her window. I looked at her, and she made a cranking gesture, so I lowered my window.
"Hello, Zoe," she said.
"Hi." I was scared out of my mind. I knew I was looking at a werewolf. I just knew it.
"Everything is going to be fine," Portia said. "But maybe you should let Karen drive. You look awfully upset."
In my ear, I heard Elisabeth say, "It's going to be fine, Zoe. Let Karen drive."
"All right," I said.
Karen got out of the car and came to the side of mine. "Put it in park," she said.
I hit the Park button, and then Karen opened my door. Before I could move, she reached in and unbuckled my seat then backed out but held out her hand. I climbed slowly from the car.
She was so big, so big.
She took my arm and gently pulled me around to the other side, then opened the passenger door and held it for me as I climbed in. Once I was seated, she leaned in and buckled me in, treating me like a small child.
Then she walked back to her side, slid the seat back, and climbed in.
"I'm going to hang up now," Elisabeth said to me. "I'll see you in another ten minutes or so."
"All right, Elisabeth." I paused. "You need to hear what I have to tell you."
"Of course. We'll have a nice, long talk. I've already got the teakettle going. I'm sorry, but I don't have any food here you're likely to want to eat."
"That's fine." I felt a tear crawl down my cheek. "I'll see you soon."
She hung up, and when I looked at Karen, I saw that Portia was gone. I turned around, and she was behind us.
"Are you breaking up with her?" Karen asked.
"I hope not."
"Is she going to be angry?"
"I don't know. Probably."
"If you haven't betrayed her, she'll forgive you."
"Really?"
"Yes. Have you betrayed her?"
"No."
"Then everything will be fine." She paused. "We're a tight clan. But they let me in. And Portia."
"But you're both from another clan, aren't you?"
She paused before answering. "Yes. But Scarlett's father isn't."
"Really?"
"Really."
"Thank you for telling me. Do you know how to drive this car?"
She smiled. "Yes." She put it in gear.
* * * *
We pulled up in front of a house. It was a nice house, but it was just a house. I didn't know what I had expected. There were other houses, and I saw several other, bigger buildings.
"What is this place?"
"This is Elisabeth's house," Karen said. Then she pointed. "That's our gym. There's a swimming pool, a couple of racquetball courts, and a whole lot of weight machines."
"Is the school where Michaela teaches here, too?"
"It's that way," she said. "But you can't see it from here."
Then Portia was at my car door, and she opened it. Like Karen had earlier, she leaned in and unbuckled my belt for me, then she waited.
I looked at the belt and over at Portia, then over to Karen. "Why do you do that?"
"Do what?"
"Unbuckle my seat belt."
"Your hands are shaking, and if you fumbled with it, you would probably get more worked up."
I looked at my hands. They were a little blurry.
"Come on out," Portia said. "Do you need help?"
"No." I climbed out, and she immediately took my arm. Karen climbed out the other side.
"My computer bag," I said. "I need it."