Lonely Heart

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by M.J. Kane

I laughed. “Well, it’s not like I can tell, I’m a mixed drink kinda gal.”

  “None of that here. Take this…” Antonio filled a plastic cup with ice, then topped if off with soda.

  I accepted with a sheepish grin. “This isn’t gonna get me kicked out, is it? After all, I’m the only white girl here.”

  Laugher erupted from his family as they toasted me with beer bottles.

  As soon as dinner ended, several party hosts appeared to remove the empty plates and collect the aluminum cans. I glanced around the room, astonished by the amount of cans littering the surrounding tables. It seemed every man in the room was in a drinking competition.

  Antonio crushed his fourth can.

  “Are you gonna be able to drive?” I asked, in a whisper.

  He kissed my cheek. “Don’t worry, mi vida, I’ll not only be able to drive, I’ll be able to get it up.” He winked.

  My cheeks grew hot as my body temperature shot sky high. Thank God he whispered.

  “Okay, this is what happens next…” Adrianna gave a crash course of the next portion of tonight’s festivities. Then Antonio, Adrianna, and their father left to fulfill family duties, leaving me at the table with his grandmother, nephew, Fernando, and his mother, Mrs. Alverez.

  The music changed into a more somber style as lights dimmed and our focus was directed to the dance floor.

  Mr. Rodriguez, Antonio’s father, appeared, escorting one of his daughters, her hand resting in the crook of his arm. Antonio followed with the other. My mouth fell open along with everyone else’s as we ooh’d and ahh’d.

  Since our arrival, I had only spied the twins from a distance at the head table they shared with their friends during dinner. Carmen and Catalina epitomized twin fairy tale princesses.

  Both wore elegant taffeta and chiffon gowns. A beautiful shade of sage with a shimmering overlay of translucent purple, pink, and blue that glowed elegantly in the spotlight. The dresses were strapless with fitted bodices decorated with tiny gems repeated over the soft overlay. Both girls wore their hair up with floral hairpieces of different colors to represent their individuality.

  Even though we met months ago, it was still hard to tell them apart.

  Half way through the song, the girls changed dance partners, allowing each one time to spend with their father. And, as Adrianna explained, Antonio stepped up to help their father raise them all. In their eyes, he was their second father.

  The next dance, a waltz, was performed by the twins and their male court made up of cousins. Fourteen young men dressed in handsome white tuxedos formed a box, made up of seven each, around the young ladies, assisting them as they twirled between them to the song, Dreaming of You, by Selena.

  Antonio stood next to his father on the sideline, his hand resting on his shoulder in what appeared to be emotional support. Adrianna stood on the other side doing the same. Behind them sat a large table full of birthday gifts brought by guests. An easel beside it held an enlarged version of the photograph from Mrs. Alvarez’s living room, the one of Antonio’s mother when she was pregnant.

  Not only was today a celebration of fifteen years of life, it was also the day they lost a wife and mother.

  More tears came as I realized the significance of Antonio inviting me to share this day with his family.

  Next came the most anticipated part of the event, the official welcome to womanhood. Both girls sat in the middle of the dance floor in chairs decorated with balloons and ribbons. Carmen and Catalina held hands in a mixture of excitement and fifteen years of anticipation.

  Their grandmother started the ceremony by removing the floral hair combs, replacing each with tiaras just as unique. Next she handed them each a scepter. Both items symbolized the ability to face the challenges of adulthood and responsibility of their lives. She kissed them both on the cheek.

  Next, their ballet flats were removed and replaced with their first pair of high heels. Though traditionally done by the mother, Adrianna bore the responsibility with tears. The twins cried as well.

  Antonio’s mother had chosen the earrings, necklaces, rings, and bracelets when she learned she was giving birth to twin daughters. Their father held on to them especially for this day. It was the aunts’ job to place them on the twins.

  Antonio followed, whispering private words, which made each of them smile as he pulled two envelopes from the breast pocket of his suit. The smile on each of their faces grew so wide I thought they would split in half. He pulled the envelopes back in mock disappointment. They quickly sat straighter and composed themselves as the young women they’d become. He laughed, then handed them the coveted envelopes.

  More family members approached bearing gifts and words of encouragement for all to hear. I stopped paying attention as Antonio joined me at the family table. He appeared happy yet sad at the same time. The entire experience was an emotional roller coaster. Lord knows I smiled, laughed, and shed a few tears during the ceremony.

  I reached for his hands and squeezed. “Are you okay?”

  He watched his sisters. The myriad emotions washed over his face. “You know what? I am. For the last few days I thought it would be impossible to see this day through. The part I feared most is over. I’m good, I’m really good. Thank you for coming tonight, it means more than you know.”

  “I’m here whenever you need me, you know that, right?”

  Antonio kissed my hand. “Sí, mi vida.”

  At that moment, the announcer spoke in rapid fire Spanish as the music changed. Gone were the instrumental sounds that set the tone of the ceremony. In its place was a Salsa band.

  Trumpets blared, guitars strummed, bells chimed, and hidden behind the wall of musicians, congas played. The party took on a new life. All around us, couples left the tables and headed for the dance floor.

  Antonio stood, held his hand out to me, and smiled. “Let’s dance.”

  Chapter 28

  “Dance to what?”

  Once again Kaitlyn made me laugh without trying. “The music.”

  “Um…,” her eyes shot to the dancers moving in time to the Salsa band. “That is a different style of dancin’. I’m goin’ to look crazy.”

  “Ebony and Yasmine are your roommates. Didn’t they teach you anything?” I teased.

  “Hip Hop dancin’ is totally different. This rhythm is…fast. I may not be able to keep up.”

  I reached for the can of beer sitting on the table. “Finish this, it will help you loosen up. Believe me, it’s not about how you move, just move.” I searched the crowd for the perfect example. My cousin, Hugo, flailed his arms around doing some weird dance all his own. And as usual, women surrounded him, laughing, but not mimicking the movements. “See the guy in the orange shirt?” She nodded. “Will you look like that?”

  Kaitlyn burst out laughing. “Hell no!”

  I pulled her on her feet. “Then you’ll be fine.” I took a moment to remember exactly how she looked right now because by the end of the night, it would be sweated out. Her hair was pin curled on top of her head, spiral strands rested on each cheek, her make-up flawless; nothing about her said “mommy” at all. The strapless yellow dress was the perfect complement to her creamy skin, green eyes, and sun-kissed golden hair. The stacked open-toe black heels made those sexy legs of hers give me a flashback of having them over my shoulders. My mind went blank momentarily at the image of having them around me again tonight. “You’re going to want to take off your shoes.”

  “Uh…no. Do you know how much I paid for these?”

  “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

  Kaitlyn gulped the remaining beer and made a face. “Don’t blame me when people ask about the white girl.”

  I chuckled.

  On the dance floor, we merged into the middle of the crowd. It was awkward at first, but she gave it her all. Before long she laughed and twirled in circles. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d seen her this happy other than the day Chloe
was born. The more I thought about it, I realized the answer was never.

  And this time, I put the smile on those lips.

  Five songs later, Kaitlyn gripped my arm. “Oh my God, my feet are killin’ me!”

  “I warned you. Come on, let sit down.”

  We made our way through the sea of bodies just as another round of beers was delivered. I accepted two cans. “She doesn’t like beer. Do you have water?” I asked, reaching for a napkin to wipe sweat from my brow.

  “Don’t worry about it; I’m so thirsty right now I don’t care what it is as long as it’s cold!” She reached for one of the beers, popped the top, then drank every last drop.

  My father slapped the table with his fist while laughing. “We’ll make her fit in!” He toasted her with his can and she repeated the gesture.

  When done, Kaitlyn leaned down to remove her shoes.

  “I got it.” I patted my leg, encouraging her to rest her feet on my thigh. I un-hooked the straps and slipped off the heels. She wiggled her manicured toes. I caught her ankle, pulled it in my lap, and massaged. “It’s my fault. I should have told you to bring comfortable shoes for dancing.”

  “It’s alright. I’m havin’ a good time. It’s worth it.” Her genuine smile made it impossible to ignore her lips. What I wouldn’t do for a kiss.

  I forced myself to remember we were in public and my hands couldn’t travel past her ankle. She must have felt the same way because after a moment of gazing into each other’s eyes, she broke the spell and turned her attention back to the room.

  We watched the dance floor as song after song played. When I finished massaging her feet, Kaitlyn made no move to pull away. I enjoyed having them in my lap.

  The music transitioned from fast to slow, giving dancers time to sit down and recuperate. A few couples stayed on the floor while older ones who refused to get lost in the fray of the young ones took advantage of the available space.

  Kaitlyn studied the dancers, fascination on her face at the close body contact and smooth precision of the foot changes as the couples, locked together in an embrace, moved as one.

  “That is beautiful,” she whispered.

  “I’ll teach you.”

  She shook her head, blond curls swaying. “I don’t know, Antonio…”

  I set her feet on the ground, then stood, holding my hand out. Kaitlyn accepted my silent invitation. My arm around her waist, I whispered in her ear, “You know how to make love, right?”

  She bowed her head, no doubt blushing. “Yes.”

  “Then make love to me on the dance floor.” Linking our fingers behind my back, I led my beautiful, bare foot date into the middle of the crowd. She watched the couples around us. “It’s easy, watch my feet and let me guide you.” One of her hands went to my shoulder while the other rested in my hand. My free hand slipped down to her waist. I left enough space between our bodies so she could follow my lead. “Relax, baby, loosen up…move your hips. Look at me.”

  Those green eyes met mine. The sudden blood loss in my brain meant only one thing. I pulled her close and her eyes widened. She could feel me through the ruffled layers of her dress.

  “Remember, you’re making love to me. Close your eyes and…,” Kaitlyn got the message. She pressed her body against me; my hand slid lower on her waist. I guided her hips in a smooth one, two, three, step, ball change move. The friction of her breasts, stomach, and hips made me groan. The memory of Kaitlyn on top of me and the untamed movement of her body had me lost. Soon, we would be alone and everything I imagined doing since that night spent in her bed would come to fruition. I dipped my head down to the top of her hair and inhaled.

  The seductive fragrance of her perfume mixed with the natural scent of her skin proved more intoxicating than the beers I consumed. I never wanted anyone as much as I wanted her. Kaitlyn was a fresh breeze, a promise of perpetual sunshine in my life. I couldn’t imagine going a day without her laugh, her smile, or the way she made me feel as if I were the only man that could make her happy.

  Chloe was icing on the cake.

  A tap on my shoulder brought me out of my thoughts.

  “Perdon,” my father said, “Could I have this dance?”

  Kaitlyn appeared as flustered as I was. “Um…sure.” She smiled, pulled away from me, and stepped into my father’s outstretched arms.

  “He doesn’t know what he’s doing. Let me show you how real men dance with beautiful ladies.” He laughed and whisked Kaitlyn away.

  It was impossible not to scowl as I walked back to the table where my family sat.

  “Sit down,” Fernando said.

  “What?” My attention was on the dance floor, making sure there was space between Kaitlyn and my father.

  “¡Siéntese por favor!” he spat, tugging my arm until my butt hit the seat.

  Across the table, Adrianna shook her head, laughed, and continued to rock my nephew to sleep.

  “What?” I asked again, unable to hide my irritation.

  Fernando leaned in. “You were about to get X-rated out there. Your papi came to save you.” He chuckled. “The next time you get up, put your jacket back on.” He added, pointing to his crotch.

  I looked down at the tent in my pants. “Que mierda.”

  His laugh turned into a cough. “Dios mio. Don’t look now, but here comes Gina.”

  “Gina?” If things weren’t awkward enough.

  He nodded.

  “Antonio, long time, no see. ¿Que pasa?”

  And just like that, the tent deflated. I forced a cordial smile. “Hello, Gina. How are you?”

  She rested sharply manicured nails on her hip. “You’d know if you bothered to call. It’s been months, Antonio.”

  Five to be exact. “I know.”

  “You never called back.” Her stare felt like shooting daggers. I could see Fernando in my peripheral scoot his chair away.

  “Gina,” Adrianna tried to get her best friend’s attention; it didn’t work.

  I looked around, hoping the people at the surrounding tables were unable to hear us, but the odds of that happening were impossible. Gina always made sure her presence was known, even in loud places. “Now isn’t the time or place for this conversation.”

  “Excuse me?” A thin eyebrow lifted, a telltale sign something unpleasant was about to come from her mouth. “The wrong time and place? Let me tell you─”

  I jumped up from the table, grabbed her elbow, and escorted my ex-girlfriend out of the community center to the parking lot. Gina was beyond feisty when mad. She was not about to ruin my sisters’ party with a temper tantrum.

  “Let me go!” she ripped her arm from my grip the minute we hit the parking lot.

  “Gina, calm down.” As soon as the words left my mouth, I knew it was a bad decision.

  “Calm down? Are you kidding me? We dated for two years then you suddenly stop calling. No warning…nada. Now months later you’re with some white puta and you tell me I need to calm down?” She stormed around, expletives shooting from her mouth.

  Jealousy never looked good on her.

  “If memory serves me correct, you were the one who said not to call until I made up my mind about seeing you again.” I shrugged. “Do you expect me to believe you’ve been sitting at home alone all this time?”

  I saw the fire in her eyes a split second before her hand connected with the side of my face. Man, did she have an arm.

  She swung again; I caught her arm and held firm. “You only get one freebie. You’re right; I should have called and said it was over. I’m sorry.”

  “Two years, Antonio…dos años and you leave me for that─”

  “Antonio?”

  Kaitlyn walked out of the building with Adrianna and Fernando on her heels.

  “…puta!” Gina spun around to face Kaitlyn, a bull seeing red. She ran past me in her direction.

  I grabbed her waist, pulling her back. “Whoa, no, you are not about to d
o something stupid.”

  Kaitlyn stopped in her tracks, looking back and forth between us.

  Gina was a ball of rage, every nasty thing she could say in Spanish came from her painted mouth. I lifted her, kicking and screaming, putting distance and myself between them.

  “I may not understand everythin’ she’s sayin’, but I understand ‘bitch’ and the body language. If she tries to lay a finger on me, she’s gonna regret it.”

  I looked over my shoulder as Kaitlyn removed the dangling earrings she wore and placed them in my sister’s bewildered hands.

  This was a side of her I’d never seen before. Though she stood her ground, it was apparent she’d take Gina on if necessary.

  When Gina realized Kaitlyn would not stoop to her level, she stopped struggling and demanded to be free. She cursed me out once again in Spanish, then stormed off, heading back inside. Adrianna shook her head at me in disappointment, before going after her.

  Fernando looked around and realized he was the only one left. He pointed to the building. “I’m just going to go…”

  I nodded, waiting for him to get some distance before turning my attention back to my date.

  Kaitlyn stared at me, her expression unreadable.

  “I’m sorry, let me explain.” I walked towards her, but stopped when she held up a hand.

  “It’s time to go.” She went inside and left me standing alone.

  I ran a hand over my face.

  Tonight went from one full of promise to a nightmare in less than sixty seconds.

  Chapter 29

  Antonio stared out the windshield, his key in hand. “Kaity, please, let me explain.”

  I squeezed my eyes shut, willing the irritation away. Seeing a woman with feelings for him ignited a flame of jealousy I didn’t know existed.

  It wasn’t because he talked to another woman. After the way he held me while we danced made it obvious he wanted me.

  God knows I wanted him.

  The problem was another woman wanted him, too. The pain in her eyes and voice made it obvious the two of them shared history. The question was whether or not they were truly done.

 

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