“Anytime.” He held on to me for another couple of minutes before letting me go. When he did, he put his big hands on my shoulders and dipped down to look into my eyes. “You good?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.” I managed to offer him a small smile, at which point he must have decided that I wasn’t going to try to slit my wrists with the spoon in my mug and let me go.
When he went back to the cabinet he’d been busy with, I lifted my mug and watched steam rising from the surface. “Tell me about your family. What was it like growing up on a farm?”
“It was heaven and hell, all wrapped up in one sweaty package.” He grinned. “Being a kid on a farm is the absolute best. You get to be outside all day, it’s expected that you’re going to get dirty, and you even get praised for it. We had a lot of chores from a young age, but that taught us about working hard and responsibility.”
“That does actually sound pretty cool.” I took a sip of my coffee once it seemed like it wasn’t going to burn my mouth off anymore. “You said we?”
“My brother, Riley, and I. He’s two years older, which was both a good thing and a bad thing.”
“Where’s he now?”
“Still on the farm,” Taydom grunted, and though I didn’t know him very well, I could tell we were nearing territory he didn’t want to venture into. “What about you? You’re an only child, right? What was that like?”
“Well, I’m not as maladjusted as people claim only children will be, so I guess that’s a good thing,” I joked to lighten the mood. I told him all sorts of stories about growing up and my mother.
After he finished fixing up the cabinets, we had another cup of coffee or four together. We just talked and got to know each other better.
When he eventually stood up and told me he needed to get to work, we were both jittery but smiling. As we said our goodbyes at my front door, Taydom took me into his arms again.
I remembered thinking on the day that he showed me this place that I wanted him as a friend, and it felt like we were getting there. The only problem was that we’d already done so much more together than friends should.
“I’m sorry if I ruined anything by what happened between us yesterday.”
His chest vibrated as he laughed and I felt his head shaking above my own. “You didn’t ruin anything. Get out of your own head. You just have too big of a brain.”
I couldn’t help but smile at that. “Message received. I need to stop overthinking it.”
“Exactly.” He released me but dropped a kiss on my forehead before stepping away. “Good luck at school tomorrow.”
“Thanks. Have a good week.”
He smirked. “I always do. I’ll see you around, Elsie. Let me know if there’s anything else you need.”
Chapter 20
Taydom
The week was in full swing and it wasn’t even nine on Monday morning. Clutching my phone to my ear as I tried to hear over the cacophony of horns, people, and life in general downtown, I pushed open the door to my favorite diner.
“Yeah, I’ll be there at four on Wednesday and I remember about dinner tomorrow night.” Scott kept droning on about my engagements for this week while I pointed to the items on the menu I wanted for breakfast.
The waitress nodded and filled my waiting coffee cup, giving me a smile before she left to put in my order. Scott eventually told me that he’d enter all my new appointments in my calendar and double-checked a few details before hanging up.
My phone had barely hit the table when it rang again. This time, the name that came up on the screen surprised me.
“Riley?” I asked, not used to receiving calls from my brother. “Is everything okay there?”
His low, familiar laughter met my ears. “Everything’s fine. Don’t worry, little brother. I’m not calling because the apocalypse is happening.”
“Good to know,” I said, a smile tugging at the corners of my lips. Riley was a mix between my mother and father. We used to be close, but we had grown apart over the years since I moved to Texas. “How are you?”
“Fine,” he answered after a brief pause. “We’re holding up.”
My insides went cold. Riley and I might not be as close as we once had been but I still knew him well enough to know that he was blowing smoke up my ass. “How bad is it?”
“It’s not your problem anymore, Tay,” he said, and I swore he sounded exactly like my father at that moment. “I’m not calling about us or what’s going on here anyway.”
“Yeah?” I asked as I took a sip of the strong but lukewarm coffee the waitress had poured for me. “Why are you calling then?”
“Mom told me you called. She said you were bringing a woman home.”
“What about it?” Damn it.
I hadn’t brought up the subject about helping me out with that to Elsie yet. Listening to my brother now, though, I knew I should have. Riley had a sixth sense for when I was lying, and at least if I’d spoken to her about it, it might not have been a flat-out lie any longer.
“What about it?” He snorted. “Be serious, Taydom. You’ve never brought a woman home before. It seems suspicious that you’d suddenly want to bring someone now with everything that’s going on.”
“What can I say? It’s not my fault I found someone I’m serious about now.” Fuck. I was suddenly lying left, right, and fucking center. It wasn’t how I was raised and I sure as fuck never imagined it would come this easily.
Guilt settled like a giant monkey on my back, but I shook it off. If lying got me a chance at saving the farm, then so be it. Greater good and all.
“You’re serious about this woman?” Suspicion practically dripped from my brother’s tone. “Mom’s really excited about this, so it better be true.”
“What else would it be?” There was something wrong with me. Every word I said was a shovel, digging myself in deeper and deeper.
“A ploy to come home so you can give Mom and Dad money,” Riley said, cutting through all my bullshit as usual. “If that’s what it is, I’m going to be fucking upset. Just so you know. Mom hasn’t been this happy for months, so if you—”
“It’s not a ploy,” I insisted. At this point, sticking to my guns was the only choice I had. “It’s real, Riley. I’ve met someone that makes me happy, and I want her to meet you all.”
Okay, so finally there was some truth in what I was saying. Elsie did make me happy. Spending time with her was fun, and considering she was the only person, except for Andrew, who knew anything real about my past or my family, I didn’t mind introducing her to them.
Maybe it was a gross exaggeration that she was my girlfriend, but she was a girl, and she was becoming my friend.
Riley didn’t respond immediately. My brother could be as broody as my father, though. He didn’t mince his words, and he didn’t waste them.
“Well, okay then,” he said finally, his relief clear as a bell. “I’m happy to hear that you’ve found someone. God knows it’s taken you long enough.”
“Says Woodstock’s most dedicated bachelor.” Riley was known around my hometown as being unobtainable. He’d always been that way.
I didn’t know why or when he’d made the decision not to date and to give his life to the farm instead of a woman, but he’d never wavered from it. Last I had heard, he had “some acquaintances he blew off some steam with from time to time,” in his words, but nothing more than that.
He laughed again. It was one way in which he took after my mother. Riley laughed loudly and often with those he trusted the most. To the rest of the world, he could come across as a closed-off bastard, but nothing could be further from the truth.
I supposed I was the same, not that I ever really thought too much about it. We simply were the way we were.
“The difference between us, little brother, is that Mom hasn’t given up on you finding love. I played her game, went out on the dates she set me up on, and when nothing took, she yelled that I was impossible and hasn’t bothered me about it since
.”
Damn. Once this little charade of mine was over, I’d have to see what I could do to follow his example and get her off my back once and for all.
“How’s Dad?” I asked. Inevitably, talking about one of our parents led to talking about the other. I figured I might as well ask.
Chances of getting an honest answer from Riley when it was about our Dad were slim to none, but I had to give it a try. He surprised me today, though.
Letting out a heavy breath, he hesitated before giving me more than he had in years. “To be honest, that’s why I thought you were working some angle with Mom. I thought she’d told you how upset he’s been.”
“She didn’t,” I confessed. “Wouldn’t talk about him at all actually. Just said he was fine.”
“Yeah, well, he’s not.” His voice suddenly sounded strained. Tired. “It’s getting worse as the season goes on. He’s getting more and more upset. Stress hangs over his head like a fucking thunder cloud, but he refuses to talk about it.”
I whistled under my breath and shook my head. “That’s nothing new. He’s as stubborn as a mule, that man.”
“Especially when it comes to you, Taydom. You left us, and I get why you did it, but don’t expect him to be happy about it.”
“I don’t expect him to be happy. I don’t even expect him to be proud of everything I’ve accomplished, but I do expect him to shove his pride someplace where the sun doesn’t shine if it’s about the survival of the farm.”
“We’re not quite there yet,” Riley said, but it didn’t sound like he even believed himself.
“Sure, bro. I’m sure you’re not.”
Silence fell between us. I let my head fall back against the cushioning of the booth and listened to the ever-present hum of the diner.
On his end of the line was nothing but absolute silence. It wasn’t surprising, but it did make me wonder how he was really doing up there by himself, on the farm with only our parents and the occasional “friend” for company.
Before I could ask him about it, he told me he had to go and ended the call. A few seconds later, the waitress brought over my breakfast in a brown paper bag and smiled when I added a hefty tip to my check.
Once I was back at my office, I was still thinking about my family. I scrubbed my hands over my face and unwrapped my sticky buns, even though my appetite had vanished.
As I thought back over the conversation I’d had with my brother, my mind snagged on the part when we’d discussed Elsie. I hadn’t known her for a very long time, but I’d developed something of a soft spot for her.
My tenant and neighbor had already become part of my life in such a way that it was difficult to remember what it had been like without her. Glancing down at my watch, I wondered if she’d be in class yet and decided to send her a quick text.
Me: Hope you have a great first day at school. Thinking about you.
I briefly debated adding kisses, realized it would be a terrible idea, and hit send before I could come up with any other stupid ideas.
Her reply came through a few minutes later and made me frown at my screen.
Elsie: Who is this???
Just a few seconds after that, I received another text from her and discovered that even over a few simple words on a text, she could make me laugh.
Elsie: Just kidding, Taydom. Thanks. Thinking about you, too.
Something jolted in my heart as I read her words, causing my laughter to stop abruptly as I rubbed the spot.
Jesus. Fuck. What the hell was that?
Chapter 21
Elsie
Getting back into the routine of being a full-time student wasn’t easy. Contrary to what most people believed about older students, we didn’t imagine we were still kids and were acutely aware of the differences in age between others on campus and us.
Students who looked like children surged all around me, laughing and chatting in a carefree way. It made me simultaneously jealous of them and grateful that the worst possible thing that could happen to me had already happened.
The only thing I felt a sense of jealousy about was when I watched the couples walking past me. They strolled along hand in hand, looking at each other with these dopey looks on their faces that I envied.
I didn’t know them, I didn’t know how long they’d been together, or whether they would last, but seeing them reminded me that I’d never had that one true love. I didn’t know if I ever would.
After the first few weeks, though, I barely noticed them anymore. I lost track of time during the day as I got absorbed with lectures and schoolwork and collapsed into my bed exhausted every night.
Taydom and I had coffee together many mornings, grabbed dinner together occasionally, and had spent one or two weekends working in the entertainment area of his backyard together. We texted back and forth, but while we had started touching casually more often, we hadn’t hooked up again.
Our relationship had developed into an easy yet flirtatious friendship, and I’d have been lying if I said I hadn’t wanted it to become something more. Friends with benefits sounded like a good label to me, but I hadn’t brought it up with him yet.
I’d caught him looking at me with heat in his eyes on more than one occasion, but he hadn’t made a move on me. I suspected that it was because I’d told him how much it meant to me to do well in my classes and that I felt like I had some catching up to do.
I was all caught up now, though. In the majority of my classes, I’d even gotten ahead, which was something I was immensely proud of.
As my last class of the day let out a little bit early, I decided to head over to the food truck. I hadn’t spent much time with Beth since my classes had started back up and I missed my friend something terrible.
We’d seen each other so much in the couple of months after my mother’s passing, not seeing her for weeks now made me feel like I was missing a limb. She had moved her truck again and was now trying out a location near my campus at lunchtime. Apparently, it was the best spot she’d found so far.
Since it was hours after the lunch rush, the truck was quiet when I arrived. A wide grin spread on Beth’s face when she saw me and she waved like a crazy person.
“Oh my God, stranger! It’s so good to see you.” She hopped out of the back of the truck and came over to envelop me in a hug. “How have you been?”
“I’m good.” I returned her hug, then waited while she grabbed us a drink each before sitting down at a small plastic table she had placed outside. “How’s business?”
“Girl, I should have looked into the college crowd years ago. I have a steady stream of customers starting mid-morning that only runs dry by about three. It picks up again after five and keeps going until about six-thirty before all the students are gone. It’s wonderful.”
“I’m glad.” I cracked the top off the bottle of soda she passed me and took a long drink. “At least you found out about it now and not never.”
“That’s what I’ve been telling myself.” The smile finally started fading from her face as she took me in. “What about you? How’s school going?”
“The workload was killing me, but now that I’ve gotten back into the swing of things, it’s all good.”
“How is it being back on a campus full time?” She winked. “There are a lot of potential boy toys around here that I’ve seen.”
I laughed and shook my head at her. “It’s been interesting to say the least. I mean, I’m glad I’m doing this thing for myself, but it’s hard to see the social side of things. Everyone on campus is so much younger and so… free.”
The corners of her mouth turned down and her brow furrowed in sympathy. “I can see how that could be depressing. Try to look on the bright side, though. You’ve got the benefit of having real-life experience. We were bright eyed and bushy tailed once, too. Now we know better.”
“True,” I said, flashing her a weak smile. “Anyway, let’s change the topic. I don’t feel like being depressed right now. We haven’t seen each
other in way too long to spend our time that way. What else is new with you?”
She pursed her lips and moved them from side to side before shrugging. “Not too much. I went on a couple of dates, but they were all duds. What about you? How’s the new house?”
“It’s great.” I released a contented sigh as my smile grew stronger. “I can’t think of a better or more perfect place for me. Honestly, it’s like going home to a sanctuary every night.”
“And Taydom?” she asked with a coy grin spreading on her lips. “How’s he been since you moved in?”
I had known the conversation would eventually move on to him and I was ready for it. Having not wanted to tell Beth what had happened between us over the phone, I was bursting at the seams to fill my best friend in.
“We slept together,” I blurted out without any tact whatsoever. “On my first night there, no less.”
Her eyes widened. “Are you serious?”
“Yes.” I knocked my shoulder into hers. “I was worried about it just after it happened, but things haven’t been awkward between us, and oh my God, Beth, it was so great.”
She still seemed to be processing what I had said. “You slept with Taydom Gaines?”
“Yes.” I reached out to poke her in the ribs when her expression remained vacant. “Hello? Beth? Are you there?”
She swatted my hand away and laughed. “I’m here, I’m here. I’m just… shocked. I already knew you were attracted to him and that he was attracted to you. I just didn’t think either of you was going to give in so fast.”
“It was pretty damn fast, all right.” I giggled as I covered my face with my hands and shook my head. “All my stuff wasn’t even in the house yet.”
“Elsie,” she exclaimed and threw her arms around me in a side hug. “That’s awesome. I’m so proud of you.”
“You’re proud of me for sleeping with someone?” I asked, my voice muffled by her arm.
“Yes.” She nodded firmly before releasing me. “But not because you slept with him really. I’m proud of you for going after what you wanted and for not feeling guilty about it.”
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