by Cara North
"What did you say?” Emmy Johnson was on the verge of tears.
"I said I love you. Just like I loved my daddy. And I love my family. Even Buck, God help me.” Heath tightened his hold on her hand. She prayed someone said it back to the man. He was pouring his heart out for the world to see.
"Damn man,” Buck said quietly. “That's deep. Almost as deep as the buckshot Rafe dug out of my ass."
Heath snickered. Rafe nodded. “Yeah brother. That's my role in this family. I'm the melodramatic one."
"Who are you, Jack, the diva?” Bethany asked her husband, and Jack blushed.
"Woman,” he warned. “I am the wild child not a damned diva."
Jack pulled Bethany into his lap and bit the tip of her nose. She gave him a yeah right look and smiled. “We love you too, Heath."
Jack nodded. “I agree."
Jan sniffed. “You know you're my hero."
Buck gave her a sideways look, and she shrugged. “You, too, honey."
"I got shot for you,” Buck protested.
"Well,” Emmy said through tears. “I had no idea."
"Momma, how could you not know we loved you? We're your children for crying out loud.” Rafe shook his head then went to their mother.
"Well, of course, I knew that. I just didn't know you knew so much about me and your father.” She wiped her tears. “We made some mistakes. I have my regrets. I'm sure you all will, too, but I also have you boys, and I have my little girl to remind me that even after a long hard winter, there will be a spring."
Chapter 5
Lying there in the dark with Chance, Heath couldn't fall asleep. His mind had been turning over and over the possibilities. “Are you on birth control?"
"Yes.” She rolled over to face him. “You can't sleep, huh?"
"Why are you on birth control?” he blurted.
"I was in California on my own. I had to walk to school sometimes. I didn't want to get mugged and raped and...” she began.
Yikes! She really thought about the worst case scenario, but she always dealt with the worst situations. His heart ached for her. His kids would never have to face life on their own.
"Well, you didn't have anything with you when I picked you up from jail. Is Shelby sending them with your stuff?” He knew she called her roommate and told her she wasn't coming back. Chance said the woman was relieved since she was basically squatting there till she started her job.
"I forgot about that.” She withdrew her hand from his arm.
Didn't she want kids? Wasn't that what they talked about earlier?
"Why are you pulling away from me? Don't you want babies?” He wasn't going to let her withdraw from him ever again. Now, he knew she was prone to do so; he needed to stay on alert for it.
"Yes. But, I wasn't sure. I mean what if you change your mind about me?” her voice was a whisper.
"I tried for a year to change my mind about you, and you're lying here beside me now, right?” He pulled her into his chest and stroked her soft hair. “I love you. I don't know what it would take to change that, and I don't ever want to find out."
She climbed on top of him and straddled his hips. “Me either."
"So, how long does it take for that stuff to wear off?” He pulled her down on him, and she tucked her head between his chin and shoulder. Her nose was chilly pressed into his neck. “You cold?"
"No,” she answered the last question first, sighed, and then took a deep breath. “I don't know. You're not supposed to miss a day, and I've been here what three now?"
"Good.” He ran his hands along her back. She was naked, so was he. They never used to sleep naked, but since that first night, they did. His dick began to stir. It was late, and he was going to leave early in the morning to go wrangle cows. A job he hoped only took a few days. He wanted his Saturday camping trip. “So, let's make a baby. I don't want Jack to be a daddy before me."
"Actually, I think Rafe beat you both.” She nuzzled his neck. The cool nose sent little chills of pleasure all over him.
"Hmmm. Never thought about it like that.” He slid his hands farther down her body and grabbed both of her ass cheeks. He rocked his hips forward so that his erection slid against her pussy lips. The soft hair became damper with each stroke.
"That's nice.” She was on top, but he was doing all the work. She let him guide her body up and down the length of his erection. He could feel her clitoris stiffen along his shaft. He desperately wanted to dip inside her, but he wanted to make sure she was wet and ready first.
"What's nice, Sweetheart?” She began to tremble; her breath hitched, and the warmth of her body heated her head to toe. Even her nose was now warm against his neck. She laid there on top of him, loose and compliant, letting him work them both up.
"Yes,” she said.
"Yes what?” He liked she was so turned on she was lost to conversation. Her thighs stiffened, and he wondered if he waited a few more strokes if she would come.
"Yes. Yes,” she said as her hips moved against him on their own volition creating her own rhythm. Her arms caged in his chest. Her entire body began to tighten. “Right there, yes."
"Mmmm. Yes indeed.” Heath enjoyed her abandon. She writhed against him, lost in her own climb to Mount Ecstasy. Her tongue swept out and licked his neck. Her lips pulled and then sucked. He hadn't had a hickey since he was fifteen. Her teeth scraped along his skin. For a second he thought she might draw blood.
"Heath!” she cried out as he felt her undulating against the length of his dick. Her clitoris slid along his shaft over and over as the sweet smell of her wafted on the air. Moisture surged onto his cock, and he was sure she was ready for him now. As she slid up his shaft, he pulled her higher, lifted his hips so that the head of his dick pressed into her warm, wet, sheath. “Oh, Heath!"
"Yes, Baby.” He pressed into her steady and deep. She sat up and took him completely inside her. He gripped her hips, his fingers pressing into her ass cheeks. She felt amazing. Like she was made for him. “Yeah, baby, ride me. God Chance, that feels good!"
"Yes. Yes,” she said and began lifting and lowering, twisting and bucking. Hell, she looked like she was riding a bull in a rodeo. Lucky him! She lifted her arms and threw back her head. He wished he had two more sets of hands, so he could stroke her nipples, but he needed to hold onto her hips. One wrong turn and she would hurt him. She was far beyond giving up the ride to reposition now.
"Stroke your nipples. I can't. Do it for me,” he asked, and she did. Her fingers moved to her nipples and tweaked and twisted the already beaded buds. Watching her touch herself was like adding fuel to a forest fire. “Oh man, I don't want this to end."
His balls were tight. He was on the cliff's edge, but he was fighting the jump with all he was worth. He wanted, no he needed, to feel her come again. “Chance, baby, stroke your clit. Come one more time for me. Please."
"Yes.” She nodded. Sweat rolled down between her breasts. He wanted to follow that bead with his tongue, but he needed to stay focused. He fought to hold back. One eye closed as she dipped her fingers into her folds. He struggled to keep the other eye open. He could feel her fingertips stroke his base as she circled her nub. “Oh, yes."
She ground down on his shaft, and he swore if she pushed any farther he'd be at her tonsils. The head of his dick was pressed against the back of her wall as far as it would go. “Now, Chance, please!"
Her walls constricted impossibly tighter around him and pulsed only once before he exploded. Thirty seconds of pure unadulterated, mind blowing bliss. All senses began and ended inside her at that point. He was home.
She panted as she collapsed on top of him. He panted like a wet dog himself. “Damn woman!"
"I can't believe that just happened.” She was boneless on top of him. Her sweat-drenched skin against his, sticking them together like a grilled cheese sandwich.
Hmmm. Grilled cheese. A sandwich sounded real good at the moment.
"Whew.” He smiled. “I'm starving now
. You want something to eat?"
"Eat?” She was already making herself comfortable to sleep right where she was.
He chuckled. “Guess not."
"Mmmm,” she mumbled back at him and nuzzled her nose in his neck.
They were still joined in the most intimate way. Her breathing slowed, her muscles twitched, and she softly started snoring. Resigned to the fact he was not getting a sandwich at this point, he closed his eyes. He stroked her hair until he couldn't think to move his hand anymore.
* * * *
"Are you going to sleep all day?” Jan asked.
Chance rolled to face the woman. Heath was gone. It was daylight, and she was still sleeping. The fact he left without waking her really ticked her off. The fact that he left the door unlocked and his little sister was now in their bedroom where she remained in the buff under the covers really irked her.
"How did you get in here?” she said with a groggy voice as she sat up.
"Still have a key.” Jan crossed her arms and stared expectantly. “Well?"
"Well what?” She yawned.
"Heath said you would help me. Are you going to get up and help me or sleep all day?” Jan laughed. “You act like you have no idea what I'm talking about."
As she said it, she realized it was true. Chance laughed. “Bingo."
"Oh my ... I am going to kick his ass. I asked if you would go shopping with me. I haven't gone in forever. Bethany is going into the doctor's today, my mom and Jack are with her, and..."
"I'm your last resort?” She lay back down. If she was the last resort, forget it!
"No, I just wanted you to know it would just be us. That way you couldn't say you needed to be somewhere else. I know where everyone else is already.” Jan laughed. “So get up, get dressed."
"I have to shower first.” She sighed with a light laugh. “Will you start a pot of coffee?"
"Yes!” Jan was way too excited about shopping. Chance had the feeling there was more to it than met the eye, but she was still waking up and couldn't process it all right now. “Awe, look, you got a love note."
"What?” That woke her up. “Where?"
"Uh, right there. Be careful..."
"Shit!” She watched the note slip between the headboard and to the floor.
"I'll start coffee. You fish out your letter and get a shower.” Jan laughed and headed out of the room, closing the door behind her.
Chance scrambled out of the bed and reached under it to grab the note. Dust bunnies attacked her as she crawled halfway under to reach the paper with her fingertips. Good thing she was taking a shower. She sneezed and coughed as she sat back with her prize in hand. A letter. Wow. It made the realization that she needed to do some spring cleaning in the house easier to take.
Another sneeze and she was on her feet, wiping her now irritated nose. She blew the dust off the paper and unfolded it. Her heart thumped as she read silently the handwritten words to her.
Sweetheart, Couldn't wake you. Seriously. I tried. See you in a couple days. Think of me. Love, Heath.
Like she would think of anything else!
A pleasant feeling spread over her from head to toe. Then she sneezed. Damn dust bunnies!
* * * *
"Now, I see why you wanted me to come with you.” Chance laughed as Jan blushed.
"Shh.” Jan practically covered her entire face with her hands. “People will look at us. Just discretely tell me what you think."
She mumbled. Jan took her hands off her mouth as she said, “What?"
"I said we are in a sex shop. Why are you so embarrassed?” Chance was embarrassed, too, but she wasn't going to show it. Jan put her hands on her hips.
"I'm not. I just ... whisper okay?” Jan's face was a bright red. Her hair, long and dark auburn, looked brown compared to the blush on her face. Chance laughed.
"Well, who's it for? You or him?” Having mercy on Jan, she whispered the question.
"Me, of course, I like to be tied up.” Jan shrugged and then admitted, “I like playing damsel in distress, and he comes to rescue me. He's a fabulous hero."
"Okay, now we are getting in the TMI department.” Chance gulped. Heath would be a fabulous hero, running in to a woman's rescue, just pants on. Now, her face felt warm.
"You don't play games?” Jan asked and picked up the silk ties adding them to her little basket of goodies.
"Doesn't it creep you out to think of me and your brother, you know?” She knew Jan thought of her as wild and experienced, but in this department it was far from true.
"Not really, and besides, I'm not asking about you and Heath specifically. I mean in general. Don't you like to play?” Jan picked up a bottle of warming lubricant. “This is nice for massages. It warms as it touches the skin."
"Can't say I ever played any games in the bedroom.” She tried to laugh it off. Jan stopped, turned, and looked her up and down. Her sudden scrutiny felt a little embarrassing.
"Well then, we will get you set up.” Jan headed back down the aisle and picked up a bottle of warming massage oil, a pair of lovers dice, a blindfold, and a personal massager.
"Uh.” She stared at the little basket Jan handed her. “I thought we were supposed to be clothes shopping?"
"I see where you're going. You almost had me there.” Jan smiled. “I could use a new outfit or two myself. Buck loves the silky ones."
Chance blinked at the young woman's back as she passed her and headed to another part of the shop. Little Jan Johnson had grown into a full fledged sex kitten. Very much like her big brothers, she was secure and adventurous. Chance, on the other hand, had just been pretending all that time. She must have done a good job because Jan believed her to be more comfortable in this shop than she was.
"You need some streetwalker shoes,” Jan whispered.
"I think I have that covered already,” Chance lied. It worked. Jan nodded and pointed to a silky blue number. “No, you need that one."
"And you?” Jan asked as she picked up an emerald green gown.
"This one.” Bold as neon lighting Chance held up the red gown.
"No way. The pink one.” Jan laughed. “Hooker shoes, yes, hooker clothes, no."
They laughed and relaxed as the shopping continued. She decided since Heath would be gone a couple days it wouldn't hurt to school herself a bit. When Jan wasn't looking, she slipped a video in the basket. Hopefully, it would be informative.
* * * *
"I'm a little jealous,” Jan admitted as she took another bite of her ice cream.
"Me, too,” Chance agreed. “I hope she is pregnant. Jack seems happy."
"He is, and Bethany is a sweetheart. Unlike Layla and you,” Jan teased. “But seriously, I like Bethany and you."
"But not Layla?” She took a bite of the homemade chocolate ice cream and savored the taste on her tongue. They had shopped and shopped. Bags sat in Jan's truck almost covering the window. Chance hoped that Bethany planned on putting her on payroll soon. Her credit card, once empty, was now full.
"She's weird,” Jan said and nodded. “It's like Rafe is good enough to practically father her children but not good enough to date. I mean that. She won't go out with him. She rarely comes by for dinner or other events. If she walked down that street right now, she would barely acknowledge we exist."
"She's a snob, then?” She tried to figure out what it was about Layla Jan didn't like.
"Bitch is more like it,” Jan clarified. “She's going to break his heart. I just know it. Rafe isn't like Heath or Jack. When they would be mean to me, he would always come back and apologize later."
"Heath was never mean to you,” she reminded her.
"Are you kidding me? They never let me go anywhere. They would stuff me in the closet then run out of the house, so I couldn't see what direction they headed.” Jan shrugged. “Like I could find them when I was seven."
"They were in their twenties, Jan. Would you bring a seven-year-old out on a trip like this one?” She savored the las
t bite of ice cream.
Jan sighed. “Still. They should have taken me somewhere."
"They took you camping and taught you how to fish,” she defended the brothers. Jan was spoiled; those boys made her rotten!
"I guess,” Jan conceded. “Anyways it doesn't change the fact that Rafe would always at least bring me something back from a date, and he always apologized for locking me in the closet. Heath and Jack would tell me to get faster, move quick. I have to say that all of their sneaking off from me was how I was able to sneak off with Buck all the time. They taught me well."
"I won't tell your brother that.” She laughed. “Maybe she has issues. You know?"
"Rumor has it she came here from Georgia. Just showed up one day with two kids. Started working at the women's shelter and has been there ever since.” Jan nodded and finished the last of her ice cream.
"Hmmm. Maybe she ran away from someone?” she wondered.
"Bethany ran away from someone, and she's not a bitch. Layla acts like everyone is out to get her. Even Rafe, yet she lets him take care of her kids.” Jan shrugged as she stood. “She was reluctant about that, but when he showed up to fill in for Dana, Layla had no choice. From that day on, he has been watching them whenever Dana can't, and that is more often than not."
"What happened to him and Dana?"
"Personally, I think he met Layla and those kids and fell face first, but Dana said it's because she wanted to be with Bubba.” Jan headed to the truck, and Chance followed.
"Is she with Bubba?"
"Hell no. She messed up letting Rafe go. She knows that, but now it's too late. It's like a sick triangle. Dana wants Rafe. Rafe wants Layla, and Layla wants, well, no one knows what the woman wants.” Jan got in the truck.
* * * *
Cleaning the entire house didn't take the edge off one bit!
Chance let out an exhausted breath. She rolled over once more. Slowly and deliberately she inhaled the scent of Heath's pillow. Her body instantly got gooseflesh, and her senses tingled. Letting out the long breath, she gave up. Sleep was not on the roster tonight.
She sat up then looked at the clock. It was almost midnight. She was supposed to meet Bethany in the morning at Momma's Kitchen.