by L. P. Maxa
His big grin filled the screen. “Do you remember?”
She nodded. “I do. That was the first song you ever sang only to me. On the tour bus, the first night we met.”
“I also got Halen’s birthday tatted on the inside of my right wrist.”
I started cracking up when Luke knocked his shoulder into Dash, sending him flying to the side. “Where’s Pix?”
I waved. “I’m right here, kid.” I shook my head. “Having a good time?”
He nodded, big and exaggerated. “Yes.”
I winced. “Did you get a tattoo too?”
“Of course I did. It was a band activity, we all had to. We made a promise.” He held his forearm up to the screen.
I never thought a drunk tattoo would make me smile so big, but when I saw the word Neverland on his skin, I melted. “It’s perfect.”
He was beaming, and swaying instead of standing up straight. “Because that’s where Tinker Bell lives. And she’s a crazy little fairy that makes pixie dust.” He winked at me.
Chapter Fifteen
Smith
I sat up and immediately regretted my decision. I put my hands on my head, groaning. “What the fuck happened last night?”
“Why are you talking so loud?” Luke grabbed a pillow and placed it over his head.
I rolled out of bed and headed into the bathroom. I dug around in my bag until I found the large bottle of ibuprofen. I took three. Two years ago? I would have reached for an upper and some hair of the dog. Today? I just wanted a hot shower and some greasy food. I pulled the curtain back and jumped in surprise. “Jacks. What the hell, man?” He was curled up in a ball, naked.
He winced. “Stop yelling.”
“I’m not yelling. Why are you naked in the bathtub?”
He stretched his limbs slowly, putting his massive cock on display. “I threw up all over my clothes and I didn’t want to stand up again. So I just trashed them and crawled in here. It’s really cold.”
I reached in, grinning, and turned on the hot water. He screamed like a little girl and did some kind of army crawl/barrel roll out of the tub onto the rug. “I thought you were cold, Jacky Boy.”
“You’re a dick.” He crawled on his hands and knees out of the bathroom, his dick hanging down like he was a fucking donkey.
I got undressed and stepped under the hot water, my muscles immediately relaxing. I closed my eyes and leaned my head against the cool tile. I missed Dylan so much. I wanted nothing more than to get into the car and head back to Texas. But we’d come this far. Me and my band. My brothers. They’d all left their families to help me. Come hell or high water, I was going to my hometown today. For the first time in a real long time. I was going to find my mom’s ring, my grandmother’s ring, and then I was going to get the fuck out of there.
I opened my eyes when I felt something stinging on my ribs. Fuck. I forgot. I got a tattoo? My girls, my world. Aw, that was awfully sweet of me. I couldn’t wait to show Dylan.
After we loaded up the car, which took a long time since we were all hungover as fuck, we drove the short distance to a crappy diner and ate a breakfast that would make the mother of my child cringe. Then we were back on the road to Meraux. The closer we got, the more anxious I became. “Hey, you guys want to stop for lunch in New Orleans?”
Dash glanced to the side, and then back to the road. “We’ll be there in less than an hour, and I’m still stuffed from breakfast. You hungry already?”
I shook my head. I wasn’t hungry. I was just putting off the inevitable.
***
Meraux, Louisiana. My hometown. As soon as we drove past the welcome sign, I had the urge to vomit all over the car. I closed my eyes and leaned my head against the seat. I didn’t want to see this place, this town. There was a bad memory everywhere I looked. I gave Dash directions to my family’s place; I knew every twist and turn by heart. It all came flooding back, like I’d never left.
“We’re here, man.” Dash’s words were quiet.
I took a couple deep breaths and slowly opened my eyes, taking in the scene before me. I thought things might look different since the hurricane had hit this town pretty hard. But it was like the water lifted everything up, and then put it right back down where it originally sat. Even Katrina was too afraid to disturb this graveyard.
My childhood home was built on stilts, which had nothing to do with weather and everything to do with the fact that it sat on the bayou. The paint used to be white, but was now more of a washed-out gray and was peeling off in sheets. The screen door was falling off its hinges, and the moss from the trees swept against the roof in the breeze. John boats were tied up where they always were, just waiting for my old man’s drunk ass to stumble out and go night fishing.
When I was younger, I’d pray that he would drown. Fall off his pirogue and disappear in the black water. It never happened. There was what appeared to be a Rottweiler puppy chained to a decrepit doghouse. And at least half a dozen cars, in various states of rust, parked around the yard.
Jacks sat forward, his hands on my shoulders. “We’re right here with you, man. Right by your side.”
Dash turned the car off and looked at me. “It’s us against the world, bro.”
Luke cleared his throat. “Do you have any idea where your mom might have hidden the ring?”
I nodded, wiping my sweating hands on my jeans. “In my room, in my closet. There was a loose floorboard that we never told my old man about. We’d hide things in there.” I closed my eyes again, the memory of my mom winking at me every time we got away with it. “Money we came across, my favorite action figures, food, her jewelry.” I shook my head. “I should have taken it with me when I left. I should have never left those treasures behind. But after my mom died, I stopped caring. I stopped hiding things, I stopped having buried treasure. It wasn’t fun when she was gone. It was heartbreaking. It was just another reminder that I was all alone.”
I hadn’t intended to pour out some of my soul for them to see, but being here, staring at the house in front of me… It was all becoming too much. I opened the car door, slamming it with more force than necessary. I needed to get my mom’s stuff and get out of here. This place was starting to consume me.
The guys all climbed out and Dash rested his hands on the hood of the car. “You think anyone’s home? Could he be at work?”
I gestured to the rust bucket Ford pickup. “That’s his truck.”
Luke walked over to the puppy and unchained it. It looked hungry, and it was shaking even though it was warm outside. “Lo is going to kill me.” He opened the car door and put the puppy inside before shutting it again. “But no one deserves to live like that.”
I put my hands on my hips, looking up at the house. “My old man does. This is the hell he deserves, the one he created for himself.” I took one step toward the stairs. “My mom died in that prison, but her legacy isn’t going to.” I took another step, this one bolder. “Let’s go get that ring.” I headed up the steps leading to the front door. I could hear my brothers behind me the whole way.
I walked in without knocking.
“What in the flying fuck are you doing here, you little shit?”
I let out a humorless laugh. Little shit? I towered over his old ass. My dad was sitting on the couch, the coffee table in front of him piled with baggies of meth. So he was working, just not in the way my friends would probably expect. “Hey, old man.” I grinned. “How’s the foot?” My girl shooting my dad had been one of the highlights of my life thus far.
“Get the hell out of here.” He stood up, his beer belly hanging over his jeans and his wifebeater stained and dingy. “Don’t make me hurt you, boy.”
Dash cocked his head to the side and crossed his arms over his chest. “Hurt him? Really? It’s four against one. You think you can take us? You got some backwoods army stashed in this shithole?”
Luke stepped up next to me. “You could always call the cops on us. I bet they’d just love to see what
you’re up to in here.” He gestured to the drugs on the table.
“I’m going to go grab what I need. You guys keep an eye on him.” I bent down and reached under the coffee table, grabbing the Glock I knew he’d have duct-taped under there. “Here.” I handed the gun to Dash. “If he moves, use this,” I called on my way down the hall. “If you kill him, we’ll just feed his fat ass to the gators.”
I heard Jacks chuckle. “Oh that’d be fun. Please move, old man. Please.”
Hanging a right, I walked into my childhood room and stopped short, taking in my surroundings. There were broken toys on the floor and faded sheets on my twin bed. But sheets that never belonged to me.
I opened the folding doors to my closet to see a few child-size t-shirts hanging from the rod and one pair of tattered tennis shoes on the ground. Who else was living here with my dad? Who the fuck would choose him, choose this life?
Quickly, I pried up the floorboard. Sitting right where she’d left it was my mom’s ring and a necklace that her father had given her on her sixteenth birthday. Beside it was my He-Man action figure and something else I’d never seen before. It was a shiny red Iron Man figurine. I closed my eyes and let out a sigh as I said a silent prayer for whoever the woman was who’d decided to shack up with my old man and bring her kid along for the ride. Then I shoved my mom’s things in my pocket and took off back in the direction of the living room.
Dash and Luke were still standing where I had left them, Dash with the gun trained on my old man. I looked around. “Where the hell is Jacks?”
Chapter Sixteen
Jacks
I couldn’t tell you what made me go back outside, or what made me go down the stairs. I just got this chill, this feeling in my spine that I needed to move. I’d become somewhat claustrophobic, which had never happened to me before. I walked under the house, toward the water, toward the green metal boats bobbing along straining against their ropes.
And that’s when I heard it, that’s when I heard the crying. I followed the sound to the right, to the second boat. Lying inside was a kid. A little boy who couldn’t have been older than three or four. He had dark hair and light eyes, and he was rail thin. He reminded me of Landry when I’d first laid eyes on her. Only he was covered in dried blood and bruises.
“Hey, buddy, are you okay?” My heart was in my throat. It was obvious that he wasn’t okay. Not even in the realm of okay.
He jumped at the sound of my voice, rocking the small boat and letting out a little yelp. But he opened one eye and looked at me.
His cheekbone was cut. I clenched my fists to keep from reacting to how bad he looked. “Do you live here?”
He nodded, curling in tighter on himself.
“With your mom and dad?”
He shook his head.
“Where are your parents, buddy?” I crouched down, getting closer to his level, something that had always seemed to make Landry more at ease in the beginning. “Can I come sit in there with you?”
He nodded, and then closed his eyes again.
I climbed in slowly, careful not to rock the boat too much or jostle his tiny bruised little body. “Where is your mom?”
His voice was strong and clear, heavily accented. “She died when I was a baby.”
I swallowed past the lump in my throat. “And your dad?”
“Prison.”
I closed my eyes, shaking my head. Jared. His father had to be Smith’s cousin Jared. Who else in their right mind would leave a kid in this hellhole? “Did your dad play the drums?” I couldn’t make myself say that piece of shit’s name out loud. I was seeing-red angry, so pissed off that Jared had neglected his kid. That he’d left him here to be starved and beaten. Fuckin’ hell. Jared grew up with Smith, knew exactly the life he’d had. Had seen the beatings he’d endured by his dad.
The boy nodded his head again. “Yeah.”
“Who hit you?”
“My uncle. But it was my fault, he told me to stay in my room while he was working. I got hungry and came out before it was time.” He sat up slowly; I could tell his body was sore. “I won’t do it again.”
I looked around at the water, the cypress trees, the low-hanging moss. “It’s pretty out here, huh?”
He shrugged. “I guess.”
“Is that your puppy out there, the one chained to the doghouse?”
He shook his head sadly. “No. That’s my uncle’s dog. He trains them to fight, so I’m not allowed to play with them. If I’m nice to them, they’ll never get tough. That’s what he says.”
I bit my lip, bile rising in my throat. Apparently his philosophy on parenting came from how he trained his dogs. I held my hand out. “My name is Jacks. I was a friend of your dad’s when we were younger.”
He put his small hand in mine, looking me in the eye for the first time. “Are you here to get me?”
I cocked my head to the side. “Get you?”
“Yeah. My dad said that one day, someone would probably come take me from here and make me live somewhere else.” Jared had basically told his son that CPS would eventually come take him away? Why the hell had he left him here to begin with?
The little boy’s eyes held hope, and mine filled with tears.
Chapter Seventeen
Dylan
3 Months Later
“Babe?”
“Yeah, cher?”
I started to laugh, I couldn’t help it. “You have spit-up in your hair.”
He started to gag. After all this time, vomit still made him want to puke.
“Evie projectile vomited when you were in the shower. I thought I got it all.” He handed me our six-week-old daughter and ran toward the bathroom, gagging every few steps.
Smith was an amazing father and Evie was a dream baby. She was so calm, she rarely cried. As long as she had people around, she was more than happy. My doctors had weened me off my meds after two weeks of bed rest and immediately I’d gone back into labor. Evangeline Lawson James was born seven hours later weighing in at six pounds eight ounces.
I took my tiny baby and laid her down on the bed. “It’s time to get you dressed for Aunt Lexi and Uncle Dash’s wedding, angel baby.” My little girl was already a jet-setter. We’d flown in two days ago for Dash and Lexi’s wedding, which they’d postponed for us. We took the label’s private jet, avoiding all the germs that came with airports and commercial flying.
I took her out of her onesie and put her in the miniature flower girl dress. It matched Landry’s.
“I’ve got to head on down to the beach. Are you girls going to be okay?” Smith came in the room, lying down gently beside his daughter.
“Say, yep we’re good, Daddy.” I rolled her on her side, buttoning the little baby pink sundress. I grabbed Smith’s watch, checking the time. “You’re going to be late, babe.” I lifted Evie into my arms, putting her soft elastic headband in place. “We are perfectly capable of walking down the stairs to Lexi’s room without your help.” We’d rented the house in Florida that we had lived in after the tour. Smith and I were staying in our old room on the third floor. Those stairs were a workout.
“Okay. I’ll see y’all down there.” He kissed Evie’s cheek and then my lips. “You look gorgeous, cher.” He ran his hands down my sides, feeling the soft material of the blush-colored bridesmaid dress.
When he pulled away to leave, I reached out with one hand, grabbing his collar and pulling him back to me. I pressed my lips to his, kissing him deeper and involuntarily moaning into his mouth. “You look pretty good yourself, fiancé.”
His face lit up at my words. “Two more weeks, cher. And then that ass is mine.”
“Counting down?” I chuckled.
“You know it. Dash even gave me a calendar.” He winked and then headed down the stairs.
When Smith and the rest of the band had gotten home from their little road trip, he’d walked right in the door and gotten down on one knee. He poured his heart out, tears spilling down his face as he asked me to
marry him. I was so surprised, and I couldn’t say yes fast enough.
When he’d left, he had told me that he left some heirlooms behind, things that had belonged to his mom. I never asked what they were. I was just glad that he was going back, going to face his past. Knowing the real reason he’d returned to Louisiana made his proposal that much sweeter.
I looked down at the ring he’d given me where it rested on my left hand. The hand that was currently patting my tiny infant on her back, soothing her to sleep.
My engagement ring had belonged to first his grandmother and then his mom. It was so special. So perfect. It was a round diamond in a hexagon setting, tons of fine details. It was better than anything I could have dreamed up for myself. And it had belonged to his mom.
This was his last remaining piece of her. That made it invaluable in my book.
“Come on, angel baby. Let’s go find the rest of the girls.”
Chapter Eighteen
Dash
Today was my wedding day. Today I was marrying the girl of my dreams, the mother of my child. The mother of all my future children. Children she’d promised to give me, just not for another couple years or so. And that was just fine by me. I had Lexi, and I had Halen. I fell asleep at night counting my blessings.
I put my sunglasses in place and walked out toward the ocean, toward the altar on the shore. It was covered in flowers with a lace curtain backdrop. The breeze was blowing and the sun was warm. It was the perfect day to get married.
A guitarist with a portable amp played “Sea of Love” as my three best men and I made our way through the sand. I had asked Lexi to marry me on this beach right in the exact spot I stood. And now, she finally was.
“Hey, Dash?”
I leaned back and whispered out the side of my mouth, “What?”
“I don’t have Lexi’s ring, man.”
I smiled at the panic in Smith’s voice. “I gave it to Luke to hold. He’s her best friend.”