Fugitive Wife

by Miranda Lee

LEAH'S nerves had reached unbearable proportions by the time the plane landed in Brisbane, her stomach revolving in eddies of nausea. As soon as she got off the plane she rushed to the ladies' room and into one of the cubicles, gagging as she leant over the toilet bowel.

  Nothing came except a small amount of bile. Understandable, considering she hadn't eaten a thing all day.

  Five minutes later she emerged from the cubicle, pale and shaky. She looped her overnight bag over her shoulder and struggled over to the washbasins, where a few splashes of cool water over her face and mouth made her feel marginally better. The large mirror wall above still showed dark-ringed eyes within her pasty complexion. Smothering a groan, she leant against the basin in front of her, her head drooping.

  'You all right, dear?'

  Leah's head jerked up and round to find an elderly lady looking at her with real concern in her kind eyes.

  'Yes,' she croaked. 'Yes, I'm fine.'

  'You don't look very well.'

  'I'll be all right in a minute. Just a touch of motion sickness.'

  'Well, look after yourself, dear. You're not getting straight back on a plane today, are you?'

  'No. Not till tomorrow.'

  'Then I'd take a tablet before you do, if I were you.'

  'Yes, yes, I will,' she said, thinking to herself that there wasn't a tablet to cure what ailed her. She was on her way to see Gerard, her husband, the man she'd once loved to distraction and whom she'd thought she was over, had thought she could face without any danger of breaking down, or worse...of feeling anything in any way for him at all.

  Now she wasn't so sure. Her head was whirling with so many ghastly possibilities. What if she took one look at him and felt what she used to feel? What if, with one fell swoop, her love for Gareth was smashed to pieces, if he proved to be the illusion, not Gerard?

  Common sense told her that couldn't be. She loved Gareth. She knew she did. He had the sort of qualities she respected and admired. He was a warm, caring human being, whereas his brother evoked nothing but contempt for his cold-blooded ways.

  Stop acting like a little ninny, she lectured her reflection in the mirror. Pull yourself together! Get a grip! Keep reminding yourself what he did to you. Any superficial physical attraction you might feel for him will be just that. Superficial. Think of him as nothing more than a reflection in a mirror.

  Gareth's reflection. He might look the same as Gareth, but he's nothing like him. Gerard's the illusion. Always remember that.

  Leah straightened her spine, breathing slowly and deeply. Gradually her head cleared and her eyes focused on her appearance. Too young-looking, she decided. Balancing her bag next to the basin, she rifled through to find her brush and make-up bag. A few minutes later her reflection got the nod of approval. Much better. Her hair up in a sophisticated knot. Her green eyes rimmed in black. Red lipstick on her mouth.

  She looked five years older already.

  Pity about her clothes. Blue jeans and a red T-shirt were hardly power-dressing, despite the colour. She could have done with the red linen Chanel suit hanging in her wardrobe back at Kangaroo Point. Now that would have been power-dressing at its best!

  Power...

  That was the word which worried Leah the most.

  Not love. Power. She could reason it was Gareth she loved, and not Gerard. But what of the power Gerard had once had over her, the power of his personality, his sex appeal, his ruthlessness? The very things which her mind told her she now hated had once enslaved both her senses and her will. She had been putty in his hands. No doubt about that But that was then and this is now, she reaffirmed as she moved from the ladies' out to the taxi rank. You're a different person after six months fending for yourself all over the world. You're stronger, more independent, more assertive.

  You know what you want out of life and it isn't Gerard. He was a hopeless husband and he would have been an even more hopeless father, whereas Gareth will be perfect as both! Time to seize the day, darling. Time to finish with the past and forge your own future.

  Leah's courage and resolve remained strong till she stepped out of the taxi and walked into the cavernous foyer of the glass skyscraper which housed Sunshine Enterprises on its breathtakingly imposing top floor. At that point both began to dissolve. She managed to hold onto a modicum of composure in the lift, which was just as well, for as the lift doors whooshed back on the top floor she was met by a potentially undermining situation.

  Several of Sunshine Enterprises' employees— whom she knew by sight—were standing there, waiting to take the lift down. It was, after all, just after five, departure time for most of the general office staff, only the executives and their PAs regularly working overtime. They all gawked at Leah. She wished the floor would open and swallow her up.

  Still, their gawking served to put some much needed gelatin in her knees, and steel in her spine. With a cool smile, she stepped out of the lift and strode off down the plushly carpeted corridor which led down to Gerard's suite of rooms.

  The false show of confidence had a welcome effect on Leah. She actually began lofeel more confident as she moved along with her head held high, firmness in her step. She wasn't just pretending. It was a wonderfully reassuring feeling, and it came at just the right time.

  This building—with all its elegance and grandeur—had once had an overwhelming effect on her. She'd been so impressed by Gerard's lifestyle. Awed, even. Glancing around, she now saw the trappings of success for what they were. Traps.

  Squaring her shoulders, Leah kept on walking till the deep blue carpet was finally blocked by grey double doors with a security intercom panel in the wall. Before five, these doors were always wide open and led into a huge reception area staffed by a cool blonde in her late thirties, whose job it was to keep impatient businessmen at ease while waiting for the chronically busy boss of Sunshine Enterprises to see them. Leah had always been jealous of Gloria, till she'd found out the glamorous receptionist was happily married with three sons.

  Some butterflies returned as Leah pressed the intercom button, but she controlled them fairly well.

  Enid's crisply efficient voice came through loud and clear. 'Is that you, Leah?'

  'Yes.'

  Leah heard the lock on the door click back.

  'The door's open. Come on straight through.'

  The spacious reception area was dimly lit, Gloria's wide semicircular desk starkly empty. The airconditioning felt cold. Everything was quiet. So very, very quiet. Nerve-wrackingly so.

  Gulping down the lump in her throat, Leah closed the door behind her and walked slowly towards the door which led into Enid's own spacious office. Those awful old fears crowded back during that relatively short walk, the same fears which had inspired Leah's flight in the first place.

  Please, God, don't let me look at Gerard and feel anything but contempt, she prayed. But more than anything, please, God, just let him let me go!

  Worry that he wouldn't do any such thing halted her step in front of the door, her hand seemingly in slow motion as it moved towards the knob. Suddenly the door was wrenched open, Enid's normally composed face quite flushed. 'I was beginning to worry you might have run away again,' she said agitatedly.

  Leah stiffened. 'I haven't come all this way, just to run away again,' she said with a large dollop of false bravado. 'Gerard still in his office?'

  'Yes.'

  'Oh.' No escape, then. She had to go in. 'Don't...don't leave, Enid,' she blurted out, all her bravado gone. 'Promise me. Stay right here so you can hear me if I call out to you.'

  Enid's eyes widened. 'You're not frightened of Gerard, are you?'

  'Don't you think I have reason to be? He's a ruthless man, Enid. You should appreciate that more than most. You've seen the way he operates. He's not a man to be crossed. Not a man who would forget or forgive lightly. I know that now more than ever,' she said bitterly, thinking of his relationship with his mother and brother, the way he had callously cut them both out of his life. 'He must be ve
ry angry with me. He probably hates me.'

  Enid was frowning and shaking her head. 'Gerard does not hate you, Leah. He would never harm you in any way.'

  'That's what I believed. Once. Just like I believed he loved me. But I no longer take things at face value. I look beyond the facade these days.'

  Enid sighed. 'I do hope so, my dear. I do hope so.'

  Leah picked up the strange ambivalence in Enid's reply. 'I always thought you didn't like Gerard,' she said accusingly. 'That you believed I was a silly little fool for marrying him!'

  'I have to admit I did.'

  'Then don't start defending him now,' Leah said sharply. She was sick and tired of unlikely people defending Gerard. 'He's not expecting me, is he?'

  'How could he be?'

  'You might have warned him I was coming.'

  'No. I didn't.'

  'Good. Because I want the black-hearted devil to get a damned good shock when I walk in there. I don't want him having .any time to get that devious mind of his working, thinking he can con me a second time.'

  'I don't think for one minute he thinks that, Leah,' Enid said quite sadly.

  Leah threw her an irritated look, whirled and stormed into Gerard's office before her temper cooled, along with her courage. All the wind was taken out of her sails, however, when Gerard glanced up idly from his desk at her dramatic entrance, his body language betraying nothing but the mildest of surprises. Not a trace of anger. Nothing but a wry acceptance of her sudden reappearance.

  'Well, well,' he murmured, leaning back into his black leather chair and eyeing her slowly up and down. 'If it isn't Leah. My fugitive bride. To what do I owe this change of heart? In your letter you informed me you never wanted to see me again.'

  Leah swallowed, aware that her heart was racing in her chest. And no longer just from temper. Damn the man! Why could he make her feel like this?

  One cool glance and she was trembling inside. It had to be old tapes, playing in her head, she reasoned desperately. She couldn't still be in love with him. Impossible!

  But he was impressive, sitting there behind his long shiny black desk, looking breathtakingly handsome in a superb three-piece grey suit. His crisp white shut highlighted his deeply tanned face, his wavy black hair slicked straight back with a little gel. He looked sleek and sophisticated and incredibly sexy. Leah despised the way her eyes automatically ate him up, the way her heart and stomach lurched at the sight of him.

  'I haven't changed my mind about you,' she threw at him, self-disgust putting some added sting in her voice. 'I still think you're a cold-blooded bastard. But I've grown up since leaving you, Gerard. And grownups don't run away from life's problems. Which is what you are. A problem. Or should I say...my unfortunate marriage to you is the problem. I want a divorce. And I don't want any nonsense. I intend to get myself a decent lawyer, so if you're planning on making any trouble for me, then think again!'

  'A divorce,' he repeated, arching his eyebrows before sliding forward on his chair, his eyes dropping to scan the papers on his desk. He began sorting through them, no longer looking at her. 'Very well, Leah,' he said offhandedly. 'A divorce you will have, then. And without any trouble. Is that all?' he asked, glancing up from under his dark brows, his blue eyes coldly expressionless. 'Or is there something else you want? Money, perhaps?'

  'Not from you,' she snapped. But suddenly she did want to hurt him, as much as he had hurt her. My God, she would not be dismissed without giving him something to think about. Infuriated, she strode over to the front edge of the broad black desk and leant against it, leaning over so far that she was barely inches from his startled face.

  'I've found a man who loves me. Who really, truly loves me. Who can give me all the things you could never give me, for all your damned money. He's just as good a lover as you are, Gerard. In fact, better, because when we make love it's a two-way thing, not master and slave, which was the only role you wanted me to play. Slave to your ego, your incredibly arrogant, insufferable ego. The man I'm with now is sweet and sensitive. A giver. A sharer. I love him so much I can hardly bear to be away from him for a minute. And the ironic thing is you know him, Gerard. Can you guess? Can you possibly guess? No? I'm not surprised. You really can't see beyond your classically sculptured nose, can you? Well, it's G—'

  She broke off abruptly, her own nose finally registering the unmistakable scent which was coming from her husband's body. It wasn't sandalwood. It was...

  Pine,' she choked out, her eyes flaring as wide as her nostrils.

  'What?'

  'You smell of pine. Oh, my God... Oh, no...no...'

  Leah staggered back from the desk, one hand on her throat as though to stop any nausea from rising past that point. Her devastation was cataclysmic. Total. It crashed through her like a great wave, washing away all her new hopes and dreams like so much flotsam.

  For there was no such person as Gareth! She'd been right the first time. Gerard didn't have any brother, let alone a twin. The man who'd claimed he'd fallen in love with her at first sight, the man who'd convinced her he was everything his brother was not, the man who'd inspired her to such stunning intimacies was none other than her husband, Gerard.

  The magnitude of his pretence was so great—the quality of acting so good—it was almost worthy of some admiration. But, dear heaven, the perfidy of it all.

  'That bloody smell,' he muttered darkly, and lifted a pained face to her appalled one. 'Will you listen if I explain? Will you try to understand?'

  Leah could not believe his blind stubbornness. His stupidity

  'Listen?' she managed in strangled tones, her face twisted into an anguished grimace. 'Understand? What kind of monster are you? Do you have any idea what you've done? Are you so blind to the feelings of others that you honestly think you can still find some way out of this...this fiasco?'

  He stood up and started walking around his desk towards her, his face determined. My God, she thought despairingly. He's not going to give up!

  'Panic-stricken, she retreated till the backs of her knees came up against one of the large leather chairs facing the desk. 'Stop!' she ordered him before he could close the distance between them. 'If you come any closer, I'll scream!'

  He stopped, his eyes full of a very real desperation. 'You must let me explain, Leah.'

  'I don't have to do any such thing! And I'm not going to. God, but I despise you, even more than I did before. Your arrogance takes my breath away. Your lack of sensitivity is beyond description! What you did was not only dishonest, it was cruel. You created an illusion and you made me believe in it, made me fall in love with it. But the last laugh is on you. Because Gareth finally cured me of you, Gerard. I no longer love you. It's Gareth who has my love, body and soul. Yet Gareth doesn't exist. He's a myth, a make-believe man. A...a joke!'

  'No!' Gerard blazed. 'He's not! He does exist. He's me, my better half, the man I was before my father died, the man I might have been if I hadn't closed my mind to the concept of love. I banished it from my heart, exiled it from my soul because I'd seen what it had done to Dad, and I knew how much I was like him, in looks and sensitivity.

  'Love seemed so uncontrollable, and I hated that. So I trained myself to remain emotionally distant from everyone, to make every decision with my head and not my heart. I drew up a mental blueprint for the sort of girl I wanted to marry and when I met you, you seemed to fit that blueprint perfectly.

  'You think I fooled you, Leah, but it was myself I fooled. For I did love you...from the very first moment I walked down that pier and set eyes on your sweet self. I just didn't realise it till you left me. My God, I almost went insane from missing you. And from remorse. You have to believe me, Leah. I do love you!'

  Oh, he was good, she thought bitterly. So incredibly good. A conman extraordinaire. But not good enough! If he'd loved her, he would have come cap in hand and his heart on his sleeve with honest apologies and a million means of retribution. But, no, he'd come with even more deception, more lies, mo
re manipulations.

  All Gerard believed in was having his own way. She'd always known down deep that he would not let her go easily, that he would move heaven and earth to get her back. She'd fitted his bloody blueprint perfectly and he wasn't about to let such a prize get away, not when she was so malleable, so damned gullible!

  But even she would not have guessed he would go to such ridiculous lengths. One reason she'd believed in Gareth's existence was that she could not find a logical reason why Gerard would do such a thing.

  She stared at him now and wondered what he had possibly hoped to achieve, both in Broome and here today. It seemed that his act here in this office—before she'd realised who he was—had been designed to send her back to Broome as quickly as possible, back into the arms of his alter ego. But for what purpose? How long did he think he'd have been able to sustain the act? Surely he would have had to confess in the end.

  'Why?' she groaned, clutching onto her sanity by a thread. 'Why did you do it?'

  'Good Lord, Leah, isn't it obvious?'

  'No. No, it isn't obvious. I can't imagine what you thought could be gained by such trickery. When were you going to tell me the truth? Surely you didn't think you could get away with pretending you were Gareth for ever!'

  'I did try to tell you. That night on the boat. But then you...oh, hell...' He raked his hair back from his face with frustrated hands, spinning away from her to pace angrily across the room then back again. 'I'd just dig my own grave further if I told you why I changed my mind at that point in time.'

  Leah flushed at the memory of the intimacies she'd engaged in with him that evening. All in the name of love. All without protection.

  'Oh, my God!' she gasped, an awful penny dropping. 'That's what your plan was! To get me pregnant. That's what this was all about here, earlier on. You wanted me to go back. To Gareth. You wanted me to keep sleeping with him till I conceived. And then you would have had an extra lever, because you thought I'd come back to you if I had our child growing in my womb.'

  'That wasn't my original plan,' he growled. 'It just happened that way. For pity's sake, Leah, try to look at it from my angle. You would never have listened to me if I'd come to you as myself. You would never have believed me if I said I loved you and needed you.'