by D. D. Chant
As she stepped from the pod, the men guarding the house came to attention. They were the Elder Headman’s personal guard, and their red and gold robes distinguished them from the ordinary Una soldier’s black uniform.
They were known as the Red Guard, and Astra had a sudden vauge recollection that one of her dead brothers had desperately wanted to join their ranks the moment he qualified.
The memory shook her, taking her by surprise. She halted suddenly, the breath knocked from her body. It was so vivid, like a film playing across her eyelids.
“Are you alright?”
Kai’s voice startled her, and she looked up to find him watching her closely.
“I’m fine.” She paused, trying to regain her composure. “Why are they wearing different coloured sashes?”
He frowned, obviously suspicious, but answered her question.
“Una soldiers wear a coloured sash to proclaim which House they hail from. Rem’s men wear a white sash, the colour of the House of Singh. Mine wear the royal blue colour of the House of Sen.”
“I see, thank you.”
They continued on into the Elder Headman’s palace. Astra was very conscious of the attention they received from the Red Guard and the officials present. At first she thought they were looking at her, but then she realised that it was Apprentice Headman Sen that held their interest.
She shivered under their gaze, and was relieved when they left the main rooms. Finally they stood outside Elder Headman Amajit’s private study.
Astra felt panic well up within her, but strove to ignore it. There was no going back, no choice. There had never been an alternative and it was no different now.
She took a quick look up at her companion, and surprised a strange expression on his face. It wasn’t exactly fearful, but most certainly apprehensive.
It was the first time Astra had ever seen him display any hesitation. He always seemed so in control and sure that his will would be obeyed. It was as though he planned everything, expecting people to do all the things they did and said.
It scared Astra. It gave her a feeling of helplessness that, despite everything, she had never felt with Councillor Ladron.
Corbani Va Dic Ladron had always forced everyone to go along with his plans. She’d been able to defy him in small ways, and that had alleviated the sensation of being trapped.
However, Kai was different. He seemed to pre-empt every action his opponent made, and construct his schemes around what he knew they would do. His plans didn't force her to do things his way, but manipulated the course that he knew she wanted to take, to suit his own ends.
It was infinitely more chilling. Astra was still trying to erect some kind of counter defence against him. She found he scared her simply because she could not tell what his purpose was, what he was capable of, what he planned.
“You will not shame me today, Aya.” Kai’s voice broke in on her musings. “You will be loyal to me, to my family, and to the Una nation. I will allow you your own opinions only if you keep them to yourself.”
He took a step toward her, and Astra had to fight against the impulse to retreat from him.
“However if you express a thought that I have not given you leave to voice, I will forbid even that.”
His tone was authoritative, but instead of cowing Astra it pricked her temper. She found herself struggling against an ardent desire to rebel. However, rebellion would only lead to punishment, and Astra had an uncomfortable suspicion that Kai would severely punish anyone that went against him.
She couldn’t really blame him for wishing to silence her. All she had said and done on her last encounter with Elder Headman Amajit would be weighing heavily on Apprentice Headman Sen’s mind.
“Do you understand me, Aya?”
She nodded, but Kai took her hand and forced his dagger into her palm. Astra didn’t struggle, but allowed him to wrap her fingers around the hilt. When he held both her hand and the dagger in his own he spoke again.
“I will have your oath on this, Aya.”
Astra tried to ignore the firm grip of his hand on hers, she knew she couldn’t free herself unless he released her.
“I promise.”
He let her go and made to slide the dagger back into its sheath.
“Why do you believe me when I have sworn on your dagger? Is it just your idea of vindictive justice: that if I'm lying at least you have the satisfaction of knowing that my soul is blacker due to my falsely sworn oaths?”
Kai looked at her in surprise, his movements arrested, and gazed down at the knife he still clasped.
“This can work out well, Aya. All you need to do is be honest with me. I will protect you if you are loyal to me.”
“And if I am not loyal to you?”
No flicker of emotion crossed his face.
“Then I will see to it that you never have the opportunity to be disloyal to me ever again.”
Astra nodded, at least now she knew where she stood. She had the power to keep herself and her family safe. She watched as Kai slid the dagger back in to its sheath, noticing the sapphire encrusted hilt that was the twin of the dagger she wore on her thigh. She smiled softly. Distaste or reticence had made Kai’s search of her somewhat less than thorough.
Kai knocked on the door and ushered Astra into the Elder Headman’s study. Her first impression was of books.
Real books.
Hundreds, maybe even thousands of them. Their worn jackets covered every surface and lined the walls. Her second impression was of light. Looking up she saw that, in this section of the palace, the wood of the roof had been replaced with glass. It filled the room with sunshine, and made Astra feel as though she were outside.
“She looks better cleaned up, Kai.”
Astra blinked trying to find the owner of the voice. The room, so far as she could tell, was empty but for her and Kai. She felt Apprentice Headman Sen’s hand on her shoulder propelling her forward and further into the room.
A wrinkled old man sat in an armchair by the fire. He had been hidden from her vision by a particularly tall pile of books. Kai went down on one knee before the man and, after only a moment’s hesitation, Astra sank down beside him.
Elder Headman Amajit smiled.
“She looks regal enough to be a daughter of the House of Sen.”
Kai stood and helped Astra up after him.
“It is as you say, Elder Headman,” he returned.
“The House of Sen is known for being haughty and disagreeable, did you know, my dear?” asked Elder Headman Amajit. “His mother’s family are just as bad: known for their tempers and their inability to forgive. I probably don’t need to tell you that Kai displays a strong tendency toward both heritages.”
“I do not!”
Elder Headman Amajit produced his cane from nowhere, and struck Kai’s leg with more strength than Astra had thought he could summon.
“I didn’t deserve that.”
“Yes, you did,” returned Elder Headman Amajit. “How many times have I told you not to question my actions?”
He turned back to Astra, patting the seat beside him.
“Come, my dear, sit down. You have a strong look of your mother about you. Mae was always my favourite.”
“You knew my mother?”
Elder Headman Amajit patted her hand.
“But of course I did; she was full of fun and mischief and had the most delightful sense of humour that I have ever come across in a woman.”
“As I recall, you said her levity made her an unsuitable choice for a Headman’s wife,” interposed Kai.
Elder Headman Amajit’s fingers flexed around his cane, but Kai had retreated behind a chair, mindfully placing himself out of reach.
“I said that she was an unusual choice, not an unsuitable one, Kai,” corrected Elder Headman Amajit. He turned back to Astra. “How have you been, my dear?”
Astra faltered, aware of the warm hands that held hers so gently, and the kind light that shone from the old
man’s eyes.
“Well thank you, Elderman.”
“You are sure about this?”
Astra paused, slightly bewildered.
“About whether I am well?”
Elder Headman Amajit smiled.
“I was referring to your acceptance of Kai as your Bonded mate.”
Out of the corner of her eye Astra saw Kai stiffen in outrage.
“I was not aware Aya had a choice, Elderman.”
“One should always have the choice to opt out of foolish decisions, Kai,” returned the old man, smiling down at Astra.
Astra looked from one to the other of them in disbelief. She had never thought to hear anyone speak to the coldly proud man opposite her in such a way. Nor had she expected Kai’s icy façade to crumble so completely before the onslaught.
Her bonded mate seemed suddenly much more human. The horribly indifferent aloofness that characterised him had disappeared, leaving flesh and blood behind.
Astra found herself relaxing. The flesh and blood man before her was not nearly so terrifying as the one carved from ice had been.
“I am sure, Elderman. Even if I were not, there could be no going back now. We have already spoken the Bonding vows before a witness.”
Elder Headman Amajit’s snowy eyebrows rose in surprise, and he glanced swiftly toward Apprentice Headman Sen.
“Is this true, Kai?”
Kai bowed respectfully.
“Forgive us, Elderman, for our hastiness in this matter, for not waiting for your blessing and the ceremony before the Headmen.”
Elder Headman Amajit chuckled.
“Of all things, Kai, I would not describe your Bonding as hasty.”
Astra was surprised to see Kai smile a little.
“Thank you for your understanding, Elderman.”
“Now that you have my blessing, it would be best to arrange that the final Bonding ceremony take place soon.” Elder Headman Amajit’s manner became brisk. “Do you have a date in mind?”
Kai bowed again.
“We are ready to take your direction in this matter, Elderman.”
Astra saw a warm light of approval enter the older man’s eyes.
“Then I would suggest the Saturday eight days from now.”
“As you wish, Elderman.”
Astra felt Elder Headman Amaijt’s warm hand cover hers.
“I’m sorry for the rush my dear, but I’m afraid it is unavoidable.”
“Both my brother and Apprentice Headman Sen have explained matters to me. I understand what must be done.”
Kai signalled to her and Astra rose from the chair, bowing gracefully to Elder Headman Amajit.
“Thank you for accepting our Bonding, Elderman.”
------
Elder Headman Amajit was thoughtful when they had gone. Had he done the right thing all those years ago?
Had he been right to place the future of the Una nation on such young shoulders?
At the time he had thought the solution brilliant, but now…
Now he wondered if he had not sacrificed all he believed in to achieve an impossible goal. How could he have foreseen the circumstances that had occurred to make the rift between the Head Families wider?
He sighed. Jae Shin had entrusted the future of the Head Families to him, yet he felt that with every move he disappointed Jae Shin’s trust in him. Somehow he felt that despite his every effort he had not succeeded in realising Jae Shin’s dream. He’d begun to wonder if he ever would.
Was this it?
Would Jae Shin’s vision die, and there be nothing left to show that he had ever walked the earth?
Elder Headman Amajit shook his head.
“Why did you do that?”
He wasn’t startled by Shin’s voice, but looked up to see the young soldier leaning against the jamb of the interconnecting door.
“Do what?”
“Why did you embarrass Kai before Dam’sel Aya?”
Elder Headman Amajit leaned back into his chair.
“Ring the bell for tea, Shin.”
Shin obediently crossed to the bell pull on the other side of the room, and then returned to the Elder Headman’s side.
“Why did you do it?”
“Because I didn’t want Aya to be afraid of him.”
“Afraid?” Shin looked surprised. “Dam’sel Aya does not seem to be the sort of person who is frightened easily.”
“Sometimes, Shin, you are very blind,” observed the Elder Headman. “Aya is afraid of Kai in a way you cannot fully comprehend. As a man, you have never been completely in the power of someone else. Yes, there are people to whom you answer, but that is not the same thing. Aya must put herself under the direction of a man who she doesn’t know, and he has the right to do whatever he pleases to her and her Tula family. Imagine how you would feel in her place. Kai could use his power to harm and humiliate her, and Rem is the only one who could stop him. She already realises how close Rem and Kai are, so she knows that it is unlikely that he will interfere.”
“Kai would never hurt her.”
Elder Headman Amajit chuckled.
“Well, I know that and you know it; but how could Aya possibly believe that it is the truth?”
“So you belittled him before her?”
“I showed her that beneath his forbidding exterior Kai is not very scary after all.”
Shin continued to look disapproving, and the old man laughed.
“The experience will not have harmed Kai at all, Shin, and it may have done much good.”
“Do you really think it will be enough to keep them together after the truth comes out?” Shin shifted forward a little in his seat. “Rem grows restless of his ignorance, Elderman. Kai says that he will continue to accept our refusal to tell him the truth, but I am not so sure.”
“What makes you think that Rem will insist?”
Shin paused hesitantly.
“He has always fallen in with Kai’s wishes before, but Dam’sel Aya’s return has changed Rem. He is so desperate to keep her safe and shield her from hurt. He’s no longer content to be passive, but becomes increasingly bold.”
“You mean that he is no longer willing to trust that things are in hand, but wishes to ascertain for himself that everything is taken care of?” Elder Headman Amajit smiled a little. “He will make a fine Headman.”
“I just think that if we were to tell him now…”
He shook his head.
“No, Shin, Rem must not find out yet.”
“But, Elderman…”
“He must not find out.”
Shin passed a hand over his face tiredly.
“That is what Kai says.”
“But you have misgivings?”
The soldier gazed silently into the fire.
“It’s just that I know what it is to be lied to. I know how confused and hurt Rem will feel when he is told.” Shin shrugged sadly. “Maybe it cannot be avoided, but I just wish that there was some way to spare him. Rem has been through enough.”
Elder Headman Amajit looked the young man before him over with a certain amount of regret.
“Do you wish that I had told you sooner?” he asked softly.
Shin looked away.
“I understand why you waited as you did, it would have been hard to accept the truth at any time.”
“Shin, there was no way I could have told you any earlier.”
Shin looked up finally, meeting his eyes. The older man saw a raw mix of torment and sadness in their depths. Once again he cursed the ill fortune that had damaged so much, the pain that was still being felt now.
In a way he worried more for Shin than for Kai. Kai might have been forced to bear the shame that Aya had brought to him, but he had been sustained by the flame of his anger. Shin had nothing to combat his shame with, he had only sadness.
“Shin, would you really have had me place such a heavy burden on your shoulders as a child? Should I have told you the truth when there was nothing you c
ould do?”
Shin gripped his hands together until his knuckles showed white.
“I just felt as though everything had been a lie, and it hurt to know that you had kept it from me.” Shin sighed. “I can see that you had no option with me, but Rem is no child. He is a Headman and it is time he knew the truth.”
Elder Headman Amajit shook his head.
“Kai knows what to do for the best. He understands Rem better than either of us, and I trust his judgment.”
“You are not worried at all?” asked Shin carefully.
“No. I have faith in Kai, and no matter if your opinions differ, you should have faith in him too.”
Shin was thoughtful for a moment before inclining his head in tentative agreement.
“I am sorry to trouble you with my foolish fears, Elderman Di Ye.”
“Your fears are not foolish, Shin. You show a great concern and understanding of your fellow men.”
“Understanding? When my worries are forever proven groundless?” Shin stood, moving to the fireplace and prodding a log in the grate with his boot. “It seems I misjudge everything.”
Elder Headman Amajit’s eyes followed the young man sorrowfully.
“No, Shin, you have not misjudged. Rem will indeed be hurt and confused, and as much as I wish that might be otherwise, it doesn’t mean that keeping the truth from him at this time is wrong.”
Shin looked bewildered.
“I don’t understand.”
“I know you don’t. This is where you and Kai differ. You see the hurt this action will cost Rem, and you wish to lessen the pain by any means possible. Kai sees the pain it will cause, but knows that when everything is taken into account it is the only way to keep peace.”
Elder Headman Amajit rose and placed a gentle hand on Shin’s shoulder.
“You think as a man; a good man who wishes to spare his friends any difficulty, a man who will give his all to help them. Kai reasons as a Headman who must think not only of his friends, but also of his people, and the fragile peace which allows us to survive as a nation. He knows that difficult decisions must be made, decisions that will hurt some, just as this choice will hurt Rem. A good Headman will not flinch from making a judgment that will benefit the many over the few.”