by Zelie Bullen
And for those of you who tell me you don’t know what to do with your life, I’ll repeat to you what a lovely man, Alex Kuzelicki, once said to me: ‘If you do what you love for long enough, you will be successful.’
If I can offer anyone advice at all, it is to stop and smell the roses, to self-assess and invest time into developing your own personal dreams. To follow your passion, to believe in yourself, to have faith in a very simple fact, that ‘like attracts like’. When you feel good, you attract good.
Enjoy!
Zelie’s acknowledgements
As I have already mentioned in this book, I believe everyone is largely responsible for the world they create around themselves. Having said that, I have a strong desire to express my gratitude for all of the influences that have obviously been out of my control. I am mostly referring to having been lucky enough to have been born in Australia and into the family that became known as mine. Regardless of whether I have drawn them into my life or not, I also acknowledge the countless opportunities that have come my way and the innumerable doors that have swung open for me in the last forty-two years. More importantly for me at this point in time, is a great feeling of relief at being able to thank all of the people I want to in this segment of the book, including several people who were written into the first draft and who were taken out by our lovely publishers and editors for various reasons. Sometimes the reasons were as simple as needing to cut down our final word count or educating me as a writer when I was told that a ‘roll call’ of names becomes confusing to the reader. I have found writing these acknowledgements overwhelming. It has been an emotional process thinking about so many loved ones from so many walks of my life and remembering all they have done for me throughout the years. It has been difficult to simplify it all, to put all of my gratitude into only a couple of pages, but here goes.
Thank you to my husband Craig and to my son Colt for sharing this world with me, for providing me with more stability than I have ever had, and for allowing me to feel love at a level that I was sure I had banned myself from. I feel such childlike safety when I’m with you both. Your efforts, achievements, good days and bad days are an honour to share. Craig, you are my best friend; I can no longer imagine a life without you. Colt, I am often fascinated by how my mind revolves around what is best for you and how everything else takes second place in priority to firstly creating happiness for you. I joke now that you will always be my little boy, but I can already feel you becoming the man I know you will one day be. I am proud of both of you and consider myself the luckiest person alive because you are my family.
Thank you to Mum for the happiness, the variety of experiences and the learning you provided through my wonderful childhood. Thanks for the intense, endless love that you have for your three children and our families, for always giving your best to us and for the sacrifices you have made for us along the way. I am thankful that you join us around the world to share parts of our lives and I always feel that words are not enough to express the immense gratitude I have that Colt has you as a grandmother.
Although over the years I have already thanked one person more than any other in my life, I feel a strong desire to acknowledge her again now. My big sister, Julianna Esme Thompson, you were my rock, my mentor and my friend. Julie acted as my second mother and I still find it difficult to believe that I have lived longer in this life without her physical presence by my side. Over the years I have pined and mourned for her; the intensity has come and gone in waves but the longing ache I have for her increased dramatically six years ago when Colt was born. How I craved her being here to share him with us.
Thank you to Bertie, Hayley, Charlotte and Sam Nicholls, as well as Adrian, Hannah and Liam Mondy for all of your love, fun and support and for being so selfless and understanding through so many of the times in my life when I have taken up your wives’ and mothers’ time. Thanks to Nelson and Columbia for being such great kids and for being beautiful siblings to Colt.
I would like to thank my stepmother Jan and my two younger sisters Cloud and Kate for being such a massive part of my world, particularly in the last twenty-one years. Sometimes I struggle amid our busy lives to think of ways to show you three ladies just how important you are to me.
Thanks to all of the people from my childhood, especially my maternal grandma and grandpa for the stability they provided ‘in the background’ and to my uncles and aunties and cousins who continue to offer support and friendship. Thanks to all of the Bullens and to each of the Trasks, to Kenny Rodgers, Inese Dzenis, Donna Wilson and Mandy Grey for your involvement in our lives and for your heartfelt support over the years as our relatives.
To the families who, at some point in time, were an extension of my own little family in my mind. Thanks to the Hollands, the Hubers, the Gardners, the Wearmouths, the Lloyds, the Goughs, the Lemanns and Hendersons, the Bushes and Lenkeits, the Stanleys and the Van Nuses.
Thank you, Lance Holt, for your incentive, energy and ability that developed the wonderful alternative schools which were loving learning environments for us kids.
Thanks to Warwick Newton and Naomi Howell for my first lessons in friendship. Thanks to Vanessa (Ness) Holland for being like a sister to Julie and I. Thanks to Peter Holland, Bobby Juniper, Henry Hall and Phillip Lloyd for being what I considered father figures to me. Thanks to my childhood horse-riding buddies, namely Anne Gardner, Jean Wearmouth, Felicity Lloyd and Melody Semmler; you guys were my best friends. A special thanks to you, Mel; despite our long-distance relationship, the love and support continue into my present life. Thanks to Elena Jenson for years of love and fun and for teaching me much about life, the power of the mind and about courage and determination from a young age. Thanks to Danny Murray for your sensitivity. Thanks to Paul Stanley for being my first true love and for taking such good care of me for so long. Thanks to Paul Pernechele for continuing to be my friend. Thanks for the memories to so many of my schoolfriends and ‘Hills’ friends and also to many of Julie’s close mates, who looked out for me and treated me like their very own little sister, particularly when we lost Jules. Thanks to Collette Howard for your love, our laughs and for helping me through some difficult days.
My time at Warner Brothers Movie World was a monumental stepping stone for my soul, my personal development and also for my career. Thank you to everyone who was a part of that and of my younger stunt-training days; I have so many fond memories and so much gratitude for that time in my life. Thank you, Grahame O’Connell; you remain in my heart.
Thank you to Heidi Mackey, Lydia Emery, Brit Sooby, Wayne Glennie, Mark Eady, and, of course, Tamzin Mondy and my beautiful sister Freda Nicholls. You are the people I’ve turned to the most. Each of you gives me strength in different ways and I treasure all of you and your families.
Thanks to Tanya, Chris, Audrey, Lulu and Minni Bangay, Corrina Duke, Mark Bonner, Alan and Val Morris, Julia Burey and Maggie Ashley for coming into our lives and for being the type of neighbours and friends of whom one can only dream.
I am extremely grateful for the teachers of my career, namely Tad Griffith, Sled Reynolds, Bobby Lovgren and Bill Lawrence. I have learnt that to have knowledge passed on to you is an honour not a right and it is something that I hold very close to my heart. A sincere thankyou to each of you.
I have met a massive amount of wonderful and talented people in both the film industry and the live show industry, many of whom I am lucky enough to call friends. There are too many to list but I would like to say a thankyou to each of you for your involvement in, and impact on, my life.
I want to thank all of my friends and acquaintances in the circus industry for welcoming me, a ‘josser’, an outsider, into your wonderful world. I knew nothing of your world or your lifestyle when I met the Bullen family, nor of your culture, your history, devotion and pride and yet I have been warmly welcomed by some of the world’s most incredible people.
I want to thank Silvana Stockley for your insight into my life and for inspiring
me in several ways, specifically in being as direct as I’ve always wanted to be. Jim Stockley, how do I thank you for everything? For your extensive knowledge and experience, your much-appreciated advice, your direct approach combined with your finely developed skill in managing my emotions, for your wit, for continuing to be my sounding board, but mostly I want to thank you for your time and effort that has resulted in the unique friendship we share.
I would like to thank Richard Walsh at Allen & Unwin for his persuasive techniques in getting me to agree to having a biography written in the hope that it may help and inspire other people. Thanks for your sensitivity and at times brutal honesty; it has been great to completely trust you with my stories. A big thankyou to your caring team of professionals at Allen & Unwin.
If I have left anyone out of these acknowledgements, it is due to a busy schedule and an ever-changing lifestyle; it has not been done out of disrespect.
Lastly, I am not sure how to thank my big sister Freda enough, for all she has done for me in my life, for her completely committed love and support and for often making me wonder if I am truly worthy of her admiration! Together we have laughed and cried our way through this book. I had completely underestimated how difficult and time-consuming the biographical process would be and if it weren’t for Freda’s skilled and experienced way of dealing with my time management amid both of our busy lives it would never have been finished, of that I have no doubt! For that reason and due to her deep understanding of many of the emotional issues, I know that she is the only author who could have created this book to be the finished product it has become. Congratulations and thank you, Freda Marnie Nicholls, xxx.
Freda’s acknowledgements
What a journey! When Zelie first asked me to write her story, I must admit, I felt a little daunted. I had written plenty of articles, but I knew a book would be different, in size if nothing else.
There is an array of people I need to thank and acknowledge, and I will start with Maggie Hamilton, for the early encouragement as we embarked on this project; to Jim Stockley for providing such sage advice at the perfect time; Eloise Hogan, who took the beautiful cover photos of Zelie and her family; Professor John Webster for allowing us to use his quote; Leanne Owen for her input in the animal education and welfare section of the book; and a very big thankyou to my dear friend Nikki Miller, who read my first draft and offered such heartfelt feedback. To my mum, my stepmother, my beautiful sisters Cloud and Kate, and to all of my extended family and beautiful friends, thank you for being there. To Craig and Colt for letting me take Zelie away to work on the book, whether it be on the phone, computer or in person, thank you boys.
Extra thanks to one important person who came into my life because of this book: Richard Walsh, thank you for all of your understanding, advice and sharing of boundless experience. Your edit of the first draft was truly considerate and educational. I continue to feel humbled by your feedback and lucky to be able to consider you a friend.
Publishing is a remarkable process, carried out by an array of dedicated people, who ultimately provide us with wonderful books to savour. I would like to thank all of the staff at Allen & Unwin, especially our senior editor Siobhán Cantrill and publisher Claire Kingston, both of whom have helped in so many ways, and are an absolute delight to work with. A huge thankyou to the beautiful Clara Finlay, who did a stupendous job at copy-editing; both Zelie and I loved how you polished the story until it shone. Thank you ladies, and thank you everyone who played a part, no matter how big or small, in getting this book published.
My sister Zelie, I thought I already knew your life; it was an amazing experience to see it entirely through your eyes. Thank you for that privilege and for telling me about your life with such raw emotion. You remind me to look at my glass as being half full not half empty, thank you.
To my kids, Hayley, Charlotte and Sam, thank you for bringing such joy into my life. To my hard-working husband Bert, thank you for asking me to share your life with you all those years ago; you have made my life whole. I love you, ‘mountains even’.
And thank YOU for reading Zelie’s remarkable story. If you have ever considered writing a family memoir, I thoroughly recommend it. It is a wonderful record of a life and an amazing opportunity to talk and listen that we rarely give each other. Everyone has a story, and I hope you have truly enjoyed Zelie’s.