“Sammie, I am so sorry that I hurt you. I have been so messed up this past week. I wish I could take back my very bad behavior but I can’t. All I can do is promise that it will never happen again. I do not want our marriage to end,” Dominic pleads with me and while it appears heartfelt I am skeptical.
“What makes you think your word means anything Dominic? You destroyed this family with your anger. None of our feelings mattered last night.”
“Samantha, I have made so many mistakes this week. I am so sorry for my stupid behavior.” Dominic tries to move towards me but I take a few steps back. The look of horror on his face almost brings a demonic smile to my face. “You really do not want me to touch you?”
“No Dominic, I do not. You made it very clear how important I was to your life yesterday when you spent the night God only knows where. Contrary to popular opinion I am not that desperate. I will not let you walk all over me for the sake of saying I have a husband.”
“I was not with anyone else Sammie. I slept in my car that’s the truth. I went to the pool to practice and that’s when I ran into Mackenzie. I shouldn’t have talked to her about what was happening here but I needed someone who understood the anger I was feeling. This was her second attempt at the Olympics. She didn’t make it the first time. She will swim in three events in Beijing.”
“Oh! I’m sorry you assumed I was remotely interest in Mackenzie’s back story. Well let me tell you I am not. At the first sign of trouble at home you went gallivanting to the enemy. How would I ever be able to trust you? You confided in another woman forsaking the vows we took. But then those vows didn’t mean anything to you because your waiting for this to end remember?”
Shifting uncomfortably Dominic took a seat on the bed dropping his head into his hands.
“I am sorry Sammie. I am sorry that I hurt the people who mean the most to me. I want to make this right. I was all talk Sammie. I am never leaving you or giving you a divorce.”
Damn these tears I can’t stop them. “Dominic you hurt me. You promised me, my kids, and my family that you would never hurt me. We have been married less than a month and look where we are. How could I ever trust you with my heart?”
“Have I left your heart?” Dominic’s face crumbles as if I have already answered.
“Of course not. I am not some heartless monster that throws a week long tantrum because things didn’t go my way.” Dominic visibly flinches under my words.
“Sammie, I am a failure,” he said softly. “I am a bum who let his wife spend several thousand dollars to watch me fail.”
“Dominic you are not a bum. Okay you were a bum last night but before that you were not a bum. You did an amazing job we truly are proud of you. I know you wanted to go further but it didn’t work out.”
“Sammie you have carried this family since your parents died. I just wanted once to be able to give something back to you. Instead you took money out of your savings so that my family could be there to cheer me on. I failed that’s all I keep hearing in my head. It was my chance to make you proud of me for good reason. Now I have to wait four years to try again.”
“Dominic this was something that you wanted, admit that first. Second I know you wanted to make us proud you keep telling yourself that you didn’t. You have punished us for the last week. Bryce is not talking to anyone right now his feelings are so hurt.”
I take a seat on my office chair away from the bed. I want to remain angry at Dominic’s behavior but he looks so defeated I start feeling sorry for him again. Then my mind remembers that he confided in Mackenzie and I resume my tears.
“Sammie please do not cry. I am so fucking sorry baby please. I swear nothing happened with Mackenzie we just talked. I pretended I was going home and slept in my car. I figured I didn’t deserve a warm bed. How can I teach my sons to be great men when I am such a failure?”
I stand up throwing my arms in the air completely exasperated.
“You don’t get to do this Dominic. You can’t apologize to me via your pity party. Suck it up dammit. You didn’t make the Olympic team and your right I do not know how that felt. What I do know is how you made all of us feel around this apartment like we were the reason you didn’t make the team. We supported you in everyway we knew how. We band together when the going gets tough. How can I trust you as my husband now? When things got bad so did you.”
“I was greedy Sammie. For the first time in my life I had everything I ever wanted. I have my own family, a beautiful wife, and an education. Making the Olympic team was going to be the icing on the cake. Not making the Olympic team was just devastating. But nothing is more devastating to me right now than my appalling behavior. Sammie please find a way to forgive me. I do not care how long it takes. I love you so much.”
Before I can respond Dominic is on me kissing me. I try to push him away but I do not have the strength. This man standing before me is the man I married. He is the man that I love so very much. How can I push him away now?
The kiss intensifies as it moves from my lips to my neck.
“Dominic, please wait,” I moaned as his hands find my breasts.
“I need you Sammie please.” His breath is hot on my neck as he speaks.
“I am still very mad at you.”
Dominic connects with my lips once more and my words are drowned out with my anger. I do not remember taking off my clothes or Dominic taking off his clothes. We are naked in the bed and he is inside me slowly making love to me. The passion is here, the love is here, and more importantly my real husband is here.
“Tell me what I want to hear Sammie. Tell me what I need to hear baby,” Dominic demands. I am lost in the sensation of our lovemaking. Any level headed thinking has left the building as I try to keep up with his rhythm and his demands.
“Dominic ah baby,” I groaned quietly. Somehow I am still conscious that the kids are just beyond our bedroom door.
“Tell me Sammie please.”
Dominic’s pace increases and I fight to catch my breath.
“I love you so much.” I whispered this as he brings me around home plate and I slide into a fantastic mind bending orgasm. My mouth is open and it wants to scream but only a few incoherent sounds escape.
“That’s it come for your husband. Sammie, I will never leave you. You are the only woman for me.” He rolls us over without breaking our wonderful connection. I am still recovering from my orgasm as he moves beneath me.
“Don’t ever hurt me again,” I sigh as I sit up. The tears that never fully left roll down my cheeks. Dominic wipes at the tears as I begin to move on top of him. The more I move the more I still cry.
“Sammie do not cry,” Dominic speaks in a low voice. He too is conscious that the kids are right beyond the door. Sitting up Dominic presses his lips to mine as he slips his arms around my hips, which are still moving up and down.
“Stand up for me Sammie.”
I give him a strange look then does what he asked. When he pulls me back down he wraps my legs around his waist so that I am sitting on his lap.
“I need you inside me.” I hate the need in my voice as Dominic pushes himself back inside me. I wrap my arms around his neck as he puts his around my waist. Face to face we start to move in a slow rhythm rocking back and forth. In hushed whispers we talk to each other.
“I love you Sammie.”
“I love you too Dominic.”
“I will never hurt you again baby.”
“Please don’t. I need you.”
“I cannot lose you Sammie.”
“Ah Dominic, baby.” I moan as the physical closeness of our bodies generates contact with my special spot. Dominic grasps my hips moving me faster as he kisses me. My arms are around his neck holding his head firmly in place as we kiss. At once our bodies let go as Dominic’s recognizable growling sounds fill my ears. We are moving fast. Our bodies become awash with delightful vibrations. The sensations go on for what feel like forever. Our tongues unite in a passionate kiss.
“I do love you Dominic. I will always love you baby.” I bury my head in the crook of his neck as our bodies quiver with aftershocks of pleasure. We slip beneath the bed sheet wrapped in each other.
“I am still mad at you,” I said between kisses.
“I know I will make it up to you. I promise.”
The kissing continues until sleep commands us both to shut our eyes.
An odd combination of both my need for the bathroom and thirst finally wake me in the middle of the night. Dominic is snoring softly against the back of my neck. I slip from his embrace to use the bathroom careful not to wake him. After using the bathroom I see that he is still sleeping peacefully. I open the bedroom door to find our combined living space empty. Venturing to the kitchen I pour myself a glass of orange juice then sit at the dining room table.
“Hey mom, are you okay?” Morgan asked scaring me. I really need to get a handle on both my emotions and my irrational fears. I scare and cry too easily.
“Yes Morg I am fine. Just thirsty that’s all.” I replied back taking a sip of the cold juice.
“So is everything okay between you and Dominic?” She takes the chair across from me sitting down.
“Uh no, not quite. We talked but we still have to work through some things.” I look away from her embarrassed that I fell so easily in bed with him given his behavior.
“Judging by your robe you two had sex. So what does that mean?” I stare at Morgan shocked at her choice of words. I absent-mindedly grip the lapels of my robe in my hand.
“I uh,” I stutter initially then regained my composure, “Yes we did have sex but it’s complicated.”
“No it’s not mom. You love him no matter what. I can see that much.”
“You guys are my first priority Morgan. With Dominic, he isn’t just some guy. He is my husband, so I can’t just go throwing him out on the street.”
“Mom, I am not asking you to choose. I just want to know that you are okay that’s all.”
“I am still very angry he knows this is not something he can just apologize and we are all one big happy family. He messed up big time Morgan. He was being a complete and utter jackass. I think we will have to work on his coping skills.”
“I never want to be that kind of sore loser Mom. No offense.”
I look at my beautiful daughter slash sister and my heart fills with gratitude. “None taken. You are absolutely right. He demonstrated all the signs of a sore loser in addition to his extreme lack of sportsmanship. Don’t be afraid tomorrow to tell him how you feel. I worry Morgan that you are holding in so much. Say what’s on your mind within reason of course.”
I smile at her reaching for her hand. Morgan takes my hand in hers smiling back at the possibility of her words for Dominic.
“I knew things changed when the arguing stopped. I heard you crying and I wanted to come in there but I knew I had to let you two work it out. Don’t just fall into bed mom; really work this out with him. He needs to know that this type of behavior is unacceptable.”
“When did you get so wise? I told him that we still have a lot to work out regarding his behavior. Do you think you could ever forgive him?”
Morgan takes some time to think her answer through before responding.
“I think I can forgive him only because I know how it feels losing something this important to an athlete’s career. However he went too far so we will have to rebuild trust.”
“You make me so proud Morgan. I love you so much with your wise self. I hope you know that I love all of you so very much. You’re my reason for breathing,” I replied as tears fall once more. Damn it! Morgan gets out of her chair as I extend my arms to her for a hug. We hug for a while I hear the soft sobs on my shoulder.
“I love you too mom so much. I do not know what would have happened to us if you didn’t take us in.”
“There was no alternative. There was no way I was going to let someone else raise you. I know I am not the best parent but I really try Morgan. I am trying to make all this work.”
“You are a great parent. Never ever said that again. You do an amazing job around here stop being so hard on yourself.”
“Please stop being so hard on yourself,” Dominic added interrupting us. “Sorry I didn’t mean to eavesdrop on your conversation.”
Morgan and I separate and she eyes him suspiciously.
“Good night mom,” Morgan said softly. Dominic walks over to the table standing next to me.
“Morgan, wait please.” Dominic pulled out an empty chair taking a seat as Morgan turns around to face him. “I owe you and the boys an apology. Not just with words either but with actions. You were right I was behaving like a sore loser and I hurt the ones I love. Morgan I am so sorry for my behavior. I wish I could have handled the situation better.”
“I wish you had handled it better. You broke promises to all of us Dominic. I don’t know if I can ever truly trust you again.”
“I will have to earn your trust again. I am prepared to do the work it will take. I am ashamed of myself for being a bad husband and dad. I hope that you will be able to see me in those roles again in the future.”
“Do you want those roles? Not just right now either I mean permanently.” Morgan cocks her head as she studies Dominic waiting for her answer.
“I do want those roles. They are more important to me than any Olympic games.”
“We need you Dominic and when the going gets tough we still need you. You have to trust us when we said we are proud of you. You have to be a backbone for mom. She shouldn’t have to handle everything. I am not talking about money either. I am talking about whatever comes our way you have her back.”
“I am with Sammie, when did you get so wise Morgan. Everything you’re saying is exactly as it should be. I want the chance to support my wife both emotionally, physically, and one day soon financially. I let my stupid pride and ego hurt the people who mean the most to me in this world. I will never break faith with you or Charlie or Bryce or Sammie again.”
Morgan walked over to Dominic and gives him a big hug. I can see her tears are back and it brings tears to my eyes to watch this scene unfold.
“We need you Dominic. We always have, so keep it together please,” she cries harder. I see that Dominic has tears streaming down his cheeks as he holds Morgan. Dominic pulls away from her wiping her tears away.
“I will I promise Morgan. I love you very much. I want to be a good dad. This is still new to me. When I am not being a good dad please call me on it. Can you do that for me?”
Morgan nods her head up and down then gives Dominic a quick peck to the cheek.
“We love you dad,” she whispered before walking to her room. I see Dominic’s hand clutch his chest in the same fashion he did on our wedding day. Morgan has literally touched his heart.
“I love you too,” he said in an emotionally charged voice. I reach over and take one of his hands in mine giving it a quick squeeze. Once Morgan shuts her bedroom door I slide the remaining glass of juice in Dominic’s direction. He takes the glass in his free hand and downs the juice. Still holding my hand he gets up taking me with him to put the glass in the sink. We walk hand in hand to our bedroom. Inside he frees me of my robe and we make love several times before drifting off to sleep. Thankfully the kids do not have camp in the morning so we sleep in.
Over the next few days Dominic works hard on his apology to the family. He spends hours in talks with Charlie and Bryce to assure them of his intentions to be a good father. I think the emotional exchange between Morgan and Dominic worked to solidify their relationship. It takes a lot more work for Charlie to come around. I still have my reservations when it comes to Dominic discussing our marital discourse with Mackenzie. He understands that we are not up for discussion with his ex-girlfriends. I think that Dominic truly sees the error of his ways this past week. While the weeklong incident has provided us with an opportunity to speak o
ur minds it has also strengthened our resolve as a family. Bryce is beyond happy to have his daddy back.
“Daddy please do not hurt my feelings again. You made me really sad when you were mean to mommy,” Bryce pointed out.
“Bryce, my son, I am so sorry that I was mean to you. I was being a jerk and it will not happen again.”
“You were not being a man daddy and you know better.”
Bryce gave Dominic the biggest hug. Bryce then proceeded to make up for lost time by following Dominic wherever he went. If Dominic was going to swim practice he wanted to be right there with him, as did Charlie. Father Foster was happy to see us at Mass each week as a family unit. We set up family activities for the remainder of the summer that included bowling, movie afternoons, hiking, and bike riding. The activities were fun but more importantly they brought us closer together as a family.
“Hello,” Dominic said answering his cell phone. “What’s up Coach Anderson?”
I could not hear what the coach had to say but from the looks of Dominic’s huge brown eyes it was something extraordinary. Dominic closed the phone and dropped to his knees. I could see tears streaming down his cheeks as he began his speechless prayer.
“Baby what is it please tell me,” I begged dropping to my knees in front of him. Thankfully we just walked into the apartment from a spontaneous date in the afternoon.
“Andre Webster’s appendix ruptured causing an infection. He is going to be okay but he is not going to make it to Beijing. My scores qualified me for three events plus a potential spot on the 400 meter relay team,” he stammered. “We are going to Beijing.”
Dominic grabbed my hand forcing me to my feet. The strong embrace was almost enough to crush my ribs but I didn’t say anything. I was so happy for him but I new the next news out of my mouth would crush him.
“That’s amazing Dominic but I am not going to Beijing with you,” I stammered.
Deporting Dominic Page 27