“Yes. We have a chance to be together now. It’s perfect. We can be happy. It was so amazing the other night until Grant interrupted us.”
“Dane, I’m really concerned about you. I think you’ve lost your mind. I’m telling you that I thought you were Grant. He and I are together and it’s serious. We love each other. And I did make love to him. It wasn’t just sex, for either of us. And what happened between you and I was a huge mistake.”
“You made love to me. Why would you do that if you really were in love with Grant? You wouldn’t.”
“That’s a good question, Dane. Why would I? Is there something else you’re not telling me?”
“I don’t know what you’re getting at.”
“Let me try and make it clearer for you. Why do you think it was that I thought you were Grant?”
“I don’t believe you did.”
“Dane, I honestly thought I was making love to Grant. I was out of it. I felt dizzy. I couldn’t focus my eyes. Something was seriously wrong. Do you want to think about it for a while and then tell me the truth?” He was losing his mind. None of this was making sense to me. I was positive he had drugged me, but he wasn’t owning up to it.
“I am telling you the truth.”
I was afraid to come right out and ask him if he had slipped me something. I think I was afraid of hearing he could actually do something like that to me. He was completely off the wall with this entire conversation. Suddenly I wished Grant had stayed. Maybe Grant being here would snap Dane back into reality. If nothing else, it would certainly make me feel more comfortable.
“I will always care for you deeply. You, Grant, and I have been together our entire lives. But I am with him now. And I can tell you, I have no plans for that to ever change. You have to accept it.”
“I think you’re fooling yourself, Lanie. Grant uses women. He always has. When have you ever seen Grant with one girl in a long relationship? Tell me? When?”
“I haven’t.” And it was true. I hadn’t ever seen Grant in a committed relationship. Only weekend flings. But I believed him when he said he loved me. He told me it had always been me, only me. Maybe he just never wanted to be with anyone else. Maybe he thought he and I would never have a shot. Maybe he just never loved anyone else until now.
“I know you’ll come around and realize what a mistake it is being with him. You’ll figure out that you love me. You already know it. You just can’t admit it.”
“Dane. It’s not going to happen. I’m sorry. I don’t want to hurt you, but there’s nothing between us and there never will be.”
“You keep on telling yourself that, Lanie, and I’ll keep loving you. And I’m not giving up on us. When Grant hurts you, and he will, I’ll be here to pick up the pieces. I love you that much. So much that I’d stand aside and let you be with him until you realize what a mistake it is.”
“We’re getting nowhere. In fact, this is getting worse. I think you should go.” This conversation was useless. Dane was in denial and nothing I said was going to change his mind. This was the most bizarre conversation I’d ever had with him. I was so mad I couldn’t stand the sight of him. He stood up and leaned over like he was going to kiss me again. “Don’t.”
“You’ll come crawling to me, and when you do, I’ll be there. Get rid of Grant. He’ll never be able to make you happy, not like I can.” He ran his fingers through my hair. It made me uncomfortable. I had never felt that way with him before and needed him to leave, and I needed Grant to be here.
“Dane, I wish you weren’t doing this. I wish everything could go back the way it was between us.”
“I’ll never forget the feel of your skin against mine. I’ll never forget the way it felt being inside you. The way I felt when we were making love.”
“Dane, please stop. I don’t want this.” I felt my stomach lurch at his words and was disgusted at the things he was saying. I felt angry and hurt that I was losing one of my best friends. I wished I could just erase everything that had happened with him that night.
“Whatever you say, Lanie. But I know you’re thinking about when we made love. I know you are. And I know you’ll want to again.”
He reached for my hand and I pulled away. I stood up and walked past him to usher him to the door. When he followed me inside, he was right on top of me. I stopped short.
“Dane.”
He pushed me up against the wall and held me there. I tried to push him off, but he was three times my size. He knew Grant could see him outside. He ambushed me. I panicked.
“Dane, I’ll scream. I’m saying no. This is not what you do to someone you say you love. When they say no, you stop.”
He pressed his body against mine. I felt even sicker. He ran a hand down my shirt and started to unbutton it. It made me instantly feel dirty. I struggled to get out from underneath him.
“Dane, stop!”
“Shhh …”
Chapter 16
Cheese Does Make Everything Better
“… you know you want this as much as I do.” And with that I gave him my best shot to his junk with my knee as hard as I could. He immediately bent in half with a loud whimper and then was rolling on the floor. I thought about kicking him while he was down.
“Get out. I don’t want you. Do you hear me? You are my friend only, and right now that’s in question. Get out, before I call Grant or the police.”
He eased himself up from the ground, still bent and holding his stuff.
“I’m not giving up on you. Someday we’ll laugh about all this playing-hard-to-get you’re doing.”
I opened the door and pointed. “Get out!” He smiled and walked out. I was furious. I honestly believe what he had just done to me out-crapped anything that Lori or Tom had done put together. I wanted to scream. I wanted to hit him with something very large and heavy, like my car or my horse. I waited until he limped home and was inside before I was out my door and running to Grant’s. I was running so fast I was tripping over my own feet. He was already at his door. His arms were open and I flung myself into them.
“Oh, Grant.” I didn’t know where to begin. I could feel the tears welling in my eyes and all I wanted was to be where I was, in Grant’s arms.
“Lanie, are you okay? Did he touch you? Did he hurt you?” His body tensed, yet his embrace was still gentle.
“No. He didn’t hurt me.” I put my head on his shoulder and took in a deep breath of his scent. I wanted his lips to erase Dane’s kiss. I kissed him. I kissed him hard. I kissed him deeply. He kissed me back, but only for a moment and then pulled us apart.
“Do you want to talk about it?” He seemed concerned, angry and something else, but I wasn’t quite sure what.
“I wouldn’t even know where to begin. He’s insane. He honestly thinks—” I immediately regretted starting my last sentence. I knew Grant would be furious. And I knew I was screwed because there was no way the rest wasn’t coming out.
“Lanie, please finish that sentence, and no sugar-coating it.” His face was blank; beautiful, but blank.
“He thinks you only had sex with me for sex. He said you only use women for sex, and you were using me.”
“And?”
“And he doesn’t believe me that I thought I was making love to you. He thinks I knew it was him the whole time.”
“And?” This was really not giving me any idea of what he was thinking and it was getting annoying.
“He said he and I, and you and Lori, should be the couples. He said he’s in love with me and he won’t ever give up on us, and that when you leave me, he’ll be there to pick up the pieces.”
“And?”
“Grant, stop it. I want to know what you’re thinking.” I was angry with Dane, and now I was getting angry at Grant’s lack of emotion. Grant smiled and cupped my chin with his hand. “Is there anything else I need to know?”
“He tried to kiss me. Twice. But I punched him the first time, and kicked him where it counts the second.” Now he was
laughing. I was starting to worry something was wrong with the water around here. First Dane, now Grant. They both were going insane in the membrane. “You find something funny about all of this?”
“Would you like to take the horses down to the beach with me?”
I just looked at him. I think my jaw hit the ground and rolled away. After everything I just told him, he wanted to go riding. “Really? That’s what you want to do right now?”
“Yes.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me to the stables. I was dumbfounded. I had spent the past hour with a psychotic friend and now my boyfriend had lost it, too. When we got to the stables, Magic and Century, Grant’s horse, were already saddled and Century carried a full cantle bag. I gave Grant a sideways glance with a half-smirk.
“I see you’ve been busy.”
“I thought maybe we might be more comfortable talking down by the ocean. It’s very calming, don’t you think?”
“I want some of what you had before I got here.” He smiled and handed me my reins. I mounted Magic, and he Century, and I followed his lead out to the trail. Once we got there, I pulled Magic up beside him.
The ocean air was crisp and clear. I inhaled deeply, tasting the salt. I was suddenly more relaxed, but maybe that had something to do with the gorgeous man beside me. Grant brought Century to a gallop and Magic matched his cadence. Soon I was lost in the ride. Everything was put into the back of my mind and all that mattered was right now, this moment. We rode through the pine forest, which opened up to the cliff. The horses slowed to navigate their way down to the dunes. Once we got past them, we were on open beach. Grant turned Century to the hitching log, dismounted, and tied him. I was so busy looking at the ocean that I didn’t realize Grant was suddenly at my side. Like the gentleman he was, he put out his hand to help me dismount. He was right. When I was by the ocean my soul was at peace. Being here with him, my soul was elated. Once I was down, he grabbed Magic and tied him to the log. He began to unpack the bag, first two large soft blankets, and then a pouch, the contents of which I was clueless. He started to comb the beach for driftwood, which he gathered for a small fire. It was beautiful; green and blue colors danced amongst the flames.
“Lanie, I know you want to talk about everything that happened with Dane, and I want to hear it. But I have limited time with you until our parents get here and we go covert, and I’m not wasting one minute of it on Dane.”
He gave me his hand and led me to sit on the blanket, which he had spread out on the sand. Then he unpacked the pouch: a bottle of wine, glasses, a plate of cheeses, little breadsticks, and a plate of veggies and meats. He had made me a picnic on the beach. I couldn’t think of anything more sweet and romantic.
“This is just an appetizer to hold you over. Tonight, I am taking you on a real date. If we’re going to tell our parents we’re together, I have to make sure I’ve done everything right.”
“Grant, you amaze me more every second I spend with you. I would be honored to go on a date with you tonight.”
“There’s this great new Italian restaurant that just opened in town. We have 6:00 reservations and Pierre is picking us up at 5:30.”
“Wow, I get picked up in a limo for our date? I feel so special,” I teased. He laughed softly and kissed the top of my head.
“Oh, but you are, love. You mean everything to me. And although I wanted to take things slow and that hasn’t actually happened, I want your father to know I’m serious and plan to treat you the way he would want you to be treated. Forever.” My heart warmed and my head swooned. I had never had someone treat me with such respect and love. This man was more than I ever could have hoped for.
“Also, consider this your birthday dinner from me. I know we’ll probably spend the actual day with our families, but I wanted to do something special on my own.”
“Well, I plan on doing something special for you tonight, too.” I winked and ran my hand across his thigh.
My birthday was on Saturday and I was not looking forward to it. I never did. But maybe now with Grant being a part of my life this way, my feelings about it and a lot of the holidays might change. I had always found the holidays to be lonely, even surrounded by family something was missing. Don’t get me wrong; I didn’t need a man to complete me. I had lived my entire life not caring about being in a relationship. I guess I never really understood love. It changed everything. Grant changed everything. Funny, he had been in my life this whole time, but one small step towards each other had changed the whole dynamic.
“Of course, you’re not getting your present tonight. You’ll have to wait till your birthday for that.”
“Oh? You got me something special, did you? You didn’t have to, you know. Woof was the best gift. And, of course, you loving me.”
“Woof was something to make you stay home.”
“And it worked. I’m never leaving again, not without you by my side.” I caressed his cheek and then fed him a piece of cheese.
“Cheese does make everything better!” he joked.
“If I didn’t think it would burn the crap out of you, I’d cover you in melted cheese.”
“Yes, I thought about that. So I opted to bring something I know works,” he said as he reached into the bag and pulled out a giant jar of chocolate hazelnut spread and a spoon.
“Oh-my-God! Are you kidding me?” I laughed and dove for the jar. He pulled it away holding out of my reach above his head.
“Oh no, this one is all for me,” he said with a sexy grin.
“Oh, it’ll be all for you all right, if you give me that jar!” I reached for it again but really only wanted to be closer to him.
“Actually, I have something to go with this.” He pulled me onto his lap and handed me the chocolaty bliss.
“Yeah!”
“Slow down there. I don’t need you on a sugar high.”
“I’m already high on you. Kiss me now, please.”
“Well, since you said please.”
His tongue traced my lips and his hands slid over my breasts. Immediately all I wanted to do was make love to him here on the beach and spend every minute with him right here like this.
“Grant, I’m so sad that we’ve wasted so much time. We could have been together for all these years. That stupid pact. Those two stupid pacts.”
“Lanie, what are you talking about? We have spent our whole lives together. We can tell our kids about all the holidays and birthdays we’ve spent together, the prom we went to together, all the summers and winters. We’ve shared it all. The intimate part—now we have that, too.”
“You want to have kids with me?” Out of everything he said, that was what I heard. It meant forever, commitment, the whole shebang.
“Lanie, we can’t very well get married and not produce grandchildren for our parents. Of course I think about having children with you. I want everything with you. I’m not moving too fast for you, am I?”
“No. I want all that too, with you. I think I always have. I know I always will.”
“I know I always have. I’ve never felt what I do for you with anyone else. It wasn’t ever even a possibility.”
“But all those women you’ve been with, all those weekends. The ones Dane mentioned …”
“They never had a chance with me. I have only ever loved you. Lanie, I didn’t think you would let this happen between us. I just could never be with anyone else for long. They weren’t you.” He ran his hands though my hair and lowered me so I was lying on the blanket. He positioned himself over me and then covered us both with the other blanket. I felt him undo the button and zipper on my jeans and I shimmed them off underneath him. He did the same. My body sunk into the sand and Grant sunk into me. We made love on the beach, the waves crashing almost in time with out love making. My soul was now certainly at peace and at one with Grant’s.
When I felt myself on the verge of bliss, I whispered into his ear, “Grant, I love you.” Finally saying the words I know he longed to hear.
“Lanie,
I love you more than life itself,” he responded.
We spent the rest of our time there, cuddled on the blanket, talking, nibbling on our picnic and sipping our wine. The atmosphere of the fire, the ocean, the picnic and being with Grant made it the most romantic moment ever on this beach for me. I would hold this moment in my heart forever.
“We need to start …
Chapter 17
Tappity Tap Tap
“… heading back. I don’t want you to feel rushed for our date,” he softly spoke into my ear.
“I think we did this date backwards,” I said as I kissed his cheek.
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