“No matter the cost,” Monica said.
“Okay.” Starr swallowed hard. “I will agree that I've made some bad choices. But your problems are not all my fault.”
“No, Ma,” Monica responded, “they're not all your fault. We are grown now, but you damn sure laid the foundation for us not being able to tell the difference between one bad ex and the next.”
“Now look, I will take responsibility for what I've created, but don't blame all of your broken hearts on me. We are women and we have to accept the past and move on. I know that I have had plenty of men, some of them I regret and some of them I don't. The truth is that every time I was with one of your fathers, I loved him. Period. There is no analyzing why, when, and how much, just know that I did. But when I left them it was because it was no longer working. That's what I was taught: if the shit doesn't work leave it alone.”
“But did you think about us?” Celeste asked.
“No.” Starr bit her bottom lip. “I didn't. I never thought of you as being a part of your fathers. I always thought of you, each of you, as being mine. And where I went you went and if your fathers didn't follow then so be it. And maybe that was wrong, or maybe I was running from something, I don't know. But now that I'm married and have been in the same relationship for six years I've learned that love starts with me loving me. And it's not dictated by how big my man's dick is, how great he can lick and stick, if he takes me home to meet his mother, or even how well he treats my children.”
“Ma—” Celeste said.
“Let me finish. This pains me because you are my children and I see the emptiness that used to be me inside of each of you, and that's not what I want for you. I want you to know that love is not abuse, it's not cheating or having to settle. Love is unselfish, understanding, and compromising. It doesn't beat your ass because you want something different. It doesn't come to you because the one it's married to can't screw like you, and it doesn't turn away from you because you've gained a pound or two.
“Love doesn't hurt; it's what we do and the craziness we accept in the name of love that causes us pain. Now.” Starr cleared her throat. “I want every woman in this room to take her past and put it in perspective. Don't let it run your life. It's a lesson in everything. So you need to figure out what your lesson is, apply it, and keep it movin'.”
“That's something we may try, Ma. It may not happen all at once.” Celeste glanced at Monica. “But somehow we don't have a choice.”
Starr did everything she could not to cry. She sniffed and poured herself another glass of wine. She handed the bottle to Imani, who poured herself a glass, with everyone else following suit. After filling their glasses, they each held them in the air. “Here's to the abundance of shit ex-factors left us to deal with.”
“Amen.” They all laughed. “Amen.”
“Look, I don't mean to break up ya moment,” Mama Byrd said, “but speakin' of shit, anybody seen my portable toilet?”
READING GROUP QUESTIONS AND TOPICS FOR DISCUSSION
1. Do you think it would have made a difference to Celeste's, Monica's, and Imani's stories if the three sisters' fathers had been involved in their daughters' lives, or if the sisters had had the same father? How does the presence or absence of a father affect a woman's life?
2. Each sister had her father's last name. Do you think it was wise for Starr to give her daughters different last names? What part, if any, do you think that played in their family dynamics? If a mother has children by more than one man, whose last name should they have?
3. What responsibility, if any, do you think the sisters should take for the state of their lives? Did you have sympathy for them? How much of a factor is our parenting in terms of the adults we become?
4. Celeste and Sharief did not have a happy marriage. Would Celeste have forgiven Sharief for cheating if he had been having an affair with someone other than her sister? Is cheating ever acceptable?
5. Monica thought she couldn't have children, but then found out she was pregnant by Sharief. What are your feelings about Monica's pregnancy? What would you have done in a similar circumstance?
6. Should Starr have been more involved once she found out about Monica's affair with Sharief? How involved should a mother be in her adult children's lives?
7. Do you agree with Celeste's leaving her children with Monica and Sharief ? Was this an act of revenge, or did she need to leave her children for her sanity? If you were the “other woman,” would you have taken the children in?
8. Why do you think Imani kept going back to Walik? Are there reasons, other than love, for staying in a relationship?
9. Which of the characters had the greatest impact upon you?
10. Which character made the biggest change by the end of the novel?
11. Starr, Imani, Monica, and Celeste all had their ups and downs involving the men in their lives. Do you think that any of the characters in the novel were truly in love? Did anyone in the novel know or understand love? How would you define a loving relationship?
About the Author
Award-winning author TU-SHONDA L. WHITAKER has emerged on the fiction literary scene with her highly acclaimed novels Flip Side of the Game and Game Over and has contributed to the short-story collections Cream and Kiss the Year Goodbye. She received the Ella Baker and W.E.B. Du Bois International Award for Fiction Writing while serving as the editor in chief of Kean University's literary magazine. She is a social worker and lives in New Jersey with her husband and two daughters. Visit her website at www.tushonda.com.
The Ex Factor is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 2007 by Tu-Shonda L. Whitaker Reading Group Guide copyright © 2007 by Random House, Inc.
All rights reserved.
Published in the United States by One World Books, an imprint of The Random House Publishing Group, a division of Random House, Inc., New York.
ONE WORLD is a registered trademark and the One World colophon is a trademark of Random House, Inc.
READER'S CIRCLE and colophon are trademarks of Random House, Inc.
LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA
Whitaker, Tu-Shonda L.
The ex-factor : a novel / by Tu-Shonda Whitaker.
p. cm.
eISBN: 978-0-307-49535-8
1. Sisters—Fiction. 2. African American women—Fiction. 3. Domestic fiction. I. Title.
PS3623.H563E9 2007
813′.54—dc22
2006048267
www.oneworldbooks.net
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