‘I made something for Sarah’s birthday,’ she’d said, rummaging in her bags for the large sketch pad. Folded carefully between its pages had been the birthday banner. Close up it was even more impressive, with fat orange roses and tiny yellow sparrows mosaicked around the edges. ‘Don’t tell Sarah,’ she’d said.
‘Never.’ Rachel had promised to keep the secret.
Of course, Sarah knew something was up. Sissy was about as subtle as a hand grenade. ‘Don’t worry, I’m not coming up,’ she said. ‘I just wondered if you’re hungry. I’ve got the sausage rolls out of the oven.’
‘Let’s have sausage rolls,’ Sissy said to Rachel. ‘But don’t tell.’
Rachel crossed her heart.
Sarah would have found an excuse to deflect the attention if they’d admitted that the party was for her birthday. So over the past few weeks it had been branded variously as a celebration of Rachel’s work coup, an anti-Valentine’s Day party and, when they ran low on excuses, a baby shower for Magda.
The house was already heaving with their friends when Sarah’s brother came through the door with an elegant blonde wearing a simple black fitted dress. Behind them stood a hot-looking guy that Rachel didn’t recognise.
She smoothed down the front of her blue and green tartan dress and hurried over to play hostess. She still wasn’t completely sure about the outfit. She felt like a cross between the Disney princess in Brave and a throw cushion. It did set off her auburn hair nicely though.
‘Hi Robin, welcome!’ She kissed his cheek. ‘Sarah’s just in the kitchen, I think.’
‘No, I’m here,’ she said, coming up behind them.
‘Happy birthday, old girl,’ said Robin, kissing his sister. ‘How’s it feel to be twenty-nine? Ancient I bet. And look who wanted to come along.’
‘Hi Sebastian, hi Lucy,’ Sarah said.
Sebastian, Sebastian. How did Rachel know that name? Ah, of course. Sarah’s ex, Robin’s best friend and destroyer of confidence. He had some nerve turning up.
‘Robin!’ Sissy bellowed as she lunged.
‘Whoa, Sissy, easy there.’ He laughed. ‘You remember Lucy?’
‘Yeah, whatever,’ she said, holding her hand up.
Sarah’s face went as red as the tea dress she was wearing. ‘Sissy! Don’t be rude. I’m so sorry, Lucy.’
‘Sissy …’ Robin’s tone of voice warned.
‘Hello Lucy,’ she said glumly, before perking up. ‘I made the banner for Sarah.’
‘It’s gorgeous,’ Lucy said, obviously eager to get into Sissy’s good books. ‘You are really talented.’
‘Thanks, I know.’
‘Where should we put the bottles, Sarah?’ she asked.
‘Down in the kitchen please, in the ice buckets if they’ll fit. If not, then you can just put them on the side, thanks.’
Lucy grabbed Robin’s hand as they made their way through the crowd toward the kitchen.
That left Sarah and Sebastian staring at each other.
Was Sarah uncomfortable with her ex there? They hadn’t talked since she convinced him to sign up for RecycLove.com. Maybe for good reason. Rachel felt protective of her friend.
‘So, Sebastian, how are you finding the website?’ she asked. May as well talk about it.
‘It’s awesome! That’s the other reason I wanted to stop by, Sarah, to thank you.’
‘Oh really? That’s very kind. You’ve met some nice women then?’
His smirk told Rachel that he wasn’t looking for nice women.
‘What about you?’ he asked Sarah. ‘I bet you’re popular.’
He kept staring at her as if he wanted to say more.
Of course she’s popular, you buffoon, Rachel wanted to scoff. Not only is she one of the nicest people on the planet, but she’s also gorgeous. Just look at her. Her dress gave her curves and the matching red lipstick accentuated the sexy pout of a silver-screen film star. She even had the hang of Rachel’s liquid eyeliner flick.
But Sarah was typically modest. ‘I’ve had a few dates with one guy,’ she said. ‘He seems okay.’
‘He’s not here, is he?’ He waited for her to shake her head. ‘Good, then I can flirt with you.’
‘Oh, well, yes, I suppose,’ she said. ‘But I should go say hello to my boss. He’s just arrived.’
With that she left Sebastian standing there. Rachel stifled a laugh. She was sure Sarah hadn’t meant to leave her ex high and dry, but he looked like someone just took away his chocolate cake after the first mouthful.
Scattiness had its advantages.
Rachel was just about to tell him off for slating Sarah on the assessment when she saw James come in. She excused herself and went to the door.
‘Wow, you don’t usually make such an effort,’ she said, kissing him on the cheek.
He stared at his suit self-consciously, adjusting his white shirt collar. ‘Too much? I didn’t wear the tie.’
The grey suit was just woolly enough to look trendy instead of dorky. ‘No, no. Suits you.’ She rolled her eyes at her own unoriginality. ‘Why the fancy dress though?’
‘Can’t a girl just want to look pretty?’ He handed her two decent bottles of red.
‘And you’ve upgraded from Tesco’s own brand,’ she said. ‘Sarah will be impressed.’
That had driven her mad when they’d dated. Just because he drank ales he thought all alcohol should cost less than four quid. He treated his wallet like a time capsule, to be opened every fifty years.
‘Speaking of girls looking pretty, you’re looking divine tonight, Ms Lambert. New dress?’
‘Why thank you, it is. Not too Braveheart though?’
‘Aye lass, you’d give King Edward a run. I wouldn’t cross you. Where’s your housemate?’
Rachel caught a flash of red on the other side of the crowded sitting room. ‘She’s over there. Doesn’t she look fantastic?’
He stared at Sarah, smiling. ‘Seriously stunning. I know you think I’m just full of shit, but I don’t remember her looking that good.’
‘That’s because she didn’t look that good before I made her over.’ She wasn’t sure why she said that. She didn’t own Sarah.
‘Crafting her in your own image?’ he said.
‘Don’t be ridiculous.’
‘But look at her, Rachel. She’s you, only blonde with longer legs.’
Was he right? Rachel watched Sarah for signs of Rachelness.
Oh God, she realised, he might be right. There she was in the cut of her dress and chunky black leather boots and her freshly tonged wavy hair, her own statement lipstick and signature eyeliner flick.
How had she not seen what she was doing?
‘Wow, what a narcissist I am,’ she said to James. ‘This is really bad.’
‘It isn’t the worst thing in the world to have another Rachel around. You’ll come with me to say happy birthday, right?’
She was about to make a crack but he looked rather shy so she bit her tongue.
When Sarah saw James she hugged him like they were long-lost friends. She was definitely a bit squiffy already.
‘I take it you remember James then?’
‘Of course! We all went to see that film with Sigourney Weaver and the lizards.’
James looked confused. ‘Alien? I don’t remem—’
‘She means Avatar.’
‘Ah, that’s right. I’d forgotten that. I was thinking about Hyde Park that time during the Christmas market.’
‘When you spilled mulled wine down Rachel’s back,’ Sarah said, looking guilty. ‘That was my fault. I shouldn’t have asked James for a sip.’
‘No,’ Rachel said. ‘It was James’s fault for bringing a drink on a roller coaster. Who does that?’ She’d been furious with him for the rest of that night. It was just the kind of thing that she’d hated about going out with him. Everybody else thought he was great fun, but she was the one who had to live with the consequences. She never did get the red wine out of her coat.
‘Oh, I almost forgot,’ James said shyly. ‘This is for you.’ He handed Sarah a small envelope.
Rachel recognised the Caffè Nero logo.
‘It’s nothing, really. I just thought you could treat yourself to coffee.’
Rachel stared at him.
‘What?’ he demanded. ‘Aren’t you supposed to give presents at a birthday party?’
‘Yes, of course you are,’ she said. ‘It’s just, well, a little out of character for you, if I’m honest. It’s nice though. Really nice!’
‘Well, maybe I’m a new man.’
He and Sarah grinned at each other like idiots until Sissy turned up and started tapping her sister insistently on the shoulder. ‘I want to change clothes, please.’
‘Why? You look so pretty.’
‘I know. I have another outfit. I have wardrobe changes.’
‘Oh well then, let’s go. Excuse me, will you? I’m on wardrobe duty.’
She let Sissy lead her away by the hand.
‘Excuse me too,’ said James. ‘Need the loo.’
It was much later when Rachel saw Sarah and James with their heads together again, intent on their conversation. She hesitated for just a second before going over. But that was ridiculous. They were both her friends.
As soon as they noticed her though, they stopped whatever they’d been talking about.
‘What’s going on?’ She tried to keep her question breezy. La la la, I don’t really care about the answer.
‘Oh nothing,’ Sarah said. ‘Ace turnout, isn’t it?’
James scanned the room, intent on the guests. Whatever they’d been talking about didn’t include Rachel.
‘I’m getting some more wine,’ she finally said, sensing that they wanted to be alone. ‘Want some?’
‘No thanks,’ they both said.
‘Suit yourselves.’ She went towards the kitchen, feeling left out.
Chapter Thirty
Sarah
Sarah went looking for Kelly when she dropped Sissy off at Whispering Sands the next morning. Even though her head felt like a tombola after their party, she had to find out if there was any more news about the facility’s funding.
After she and Robin saw Ms Bunny, they had looked for more options. But most were old age homes, leaving just a handful that specialised in Down’s syndrome and other learning disabilities. It was seriously depressing.
They hadn’t known how lucky they were to find Whispering Sands.
She caught a flash of sleek black ponytail as she rounded the corner towards the nurses’ desk. ‘Hi Kelly.’
‘Sarah, hello.’ She looked both ways. ‘Have you got a minute?’
Sarah’s tummy churned, wondering if this was going to be another outside conversation.
Kelly grabbed her coat and led her to the courtyard.
Bad news then.
‘I’m sorry,’ she said. ‘There’s to be one final meeting, but it looks like the facility is closing down. The staff have all been told to expect it.’
‘Oh bollocks!’ What about all the nice people who looked after their loved ones? How would they find jobs? They might have to leave the area even though they had family and friends there. Some were in their fifties and sixties. They might never find work again. ‘Are you going to be okay?’
She nodded. ‘I imagine so. I’ve been looking around. Listen. We’re not supposed to be telling the clients or their families so please don’t mention it to anyone. We’re still hoping for a miracle donor to fund us but if that doesn’t happen … they’ve told us they can’t guarantee our pay beyond the end of next month. Have you had any luck with other facilities?’
‘We looked at a few but they weren’t right for Sissy.’
Kelly nodded. She understood. ‘Keep looking.’
Two of the lilac-clad staff came into the courtyard to smoke, glancing curiously in Kelly’s direction.
‘EastEnders, you say?’ Sarah said loudly. ‘Thanks for telling me. I’ll ask Sissy about it.’
As they went back inside, Sarah asked the question that had been nagging her. ‘Kelly, do you think she should live with me?’
‘That’s a big decision that only you can make,’ Kelly said. ‘What I will say is that since she’s finished school her opportunities to socialise are narrower than they were, and this is where the other residents are a real benefit. I know you work from home and she’d love to spend all her time with you, but she’s got a social life here, and structured activities. She does enjoy being around a lot of people.’
Sarah smiled, thinking about the party last night. Sissy knew more of the guests by the end than Sarah did. ‘I know she loves being here, but what about the next home?’
‘Keep looking,’ Kelly said again.
She got James’s text just as she was getting on the train back to London. Her heart sped as she read it.
It was great to see you last night and I’m going to make you keep your promise! How are you fixed next week? James xo
Great to see you too. Hope you don’t feel too rough today. I’m free most days. Sarah x
Tuesday? Xo
It’s a date. Sarah x
She could still hardly believe it. He was as fun and nice as she remembered and she could easily have talked to him all night if they weren’t at her party. Which, by the way, she’d known all along was for her. She wasn’t that dim – Catherine was hardly going to throw a baby shower for Magda, was she?
This was a mad, mad, probably very bad idea, but she’d said yes. Yes, yes, yes. It was her mantra now.
She giggled to herself. Look at her! A text from one guy and going to meet another later. That would never have happened before RecycLove.
It had seemed like a grand idea when Jeremy suggested dinner and dancing the night after the party. And it would have been if Sarah hadn’t felt like she was walking through treacle. She popped two more paracetamol and checked her reflection. There were definitely dark circles under her eyes. Hopefully the bright red lipstick balanced things out.
She glanced at the clock on her bedside table. She felt guilty but she didn’t really have time for Sissy’s nightly call. It would have to be fast to get to the restaurant on time.
She clenched the ringing phone between her cheek and shoulder as she flipped off her heels and dug around in the closet for a different pair.
‘Hi Sissy, it’s me. How’s your day been?’ As her sister answered, she made herself sit on the bed to listen. Sissy deserved her full attention and, besides, Jeremy didn’t care if she was five minutes late. His whole life seemed to be twenty-four-hour non-stop action.
Sarah thought he was joking when he said their reservation was for ten p.m. She was usually in her pyjamas by then. But must not be boring, she reminded herself. Normal people did go out that late.
She’d forgo her slippers to be a normal person. If she did it long enough it might even be true.
‘Sarah!’ Jeremy called from behind her just as she pushed through the doors at The Wolseley. ‘Sorry, I wanted to get here before you. Damn Tube.’ He kissed her cheeks and gave his name to the maître d’, who took their coats and showed them to a booth at the side of the room.
‘You look nice,’ he said as they sat.
‘Thanks. So do you.’ He wore a collared black shirt with his slim jeans. He was getting Eurotrashier with each date but she didn’t really mind as long as he didn’t start wearing a white silk scarf round his neck or tucking his sunglasses into the top of his shirt.
‘I have a question,’ she said as they looked over their menus. ‘What’s your favourite body part?’
Jeremy looked confused.
‘I mean your own favourite body part, not mine!’ Talk about fishing for compliments with a trawler’s net.
‘I’ll say this much, Sarah, you always have interesting questions. I’m still deciding which live insects I’d want to eat on a desert island, from when you asked me last time.’ He laughed. ‘The answer is ants, I think, as long a
s they’re not too big. And I guess my legs are okay.’
Sarah nodded, approving of both his answers. ‘And which part do you hate? Bear with me, there is a point here.’
While she was in the shower getting ready, between shampooing and conditioning, just as she was loofah-ing her elbows, she’d come up with the best card idea. The. Best. Idea. She had to tell someone.
‘That’s easy,’ he said. ‘I hate my nose. My nostrils are too big.’
She tried not to look up his nostrils which, as he’d mentioned it, were sizeable. ‘I do think they suit your nose, though, and your nose suits your face. So what if your wife-to-be gave you a wedding card saying how much she loved your nose? Wouldn’t that make you feel good to know that she loves even that? I’m thinking about pitching a body parts wedding card line at work. If someone loves the part of you that you’re most sensitive about then they must really, really love you, don’t you think?’
Sarah fantasised about that man, the one who found all of her quirks endearing. He’d let her know in every possible way that he thought she was perfect, and he’d love to bake as much as she did. Her Prince Charming in a pavlova.
Jeremy didn’t look too sure about her idea, but then he wasn’t in the wedding card business. He sold computer storage solutions so she forgave his lack of whimsy. Besides, he made a perfectly lovely dinner date.
‘So we’ve got two options for clubs tonight,’ he said later as he poured the last of the wine into Sarah’s glass. ‘There’s a DJ I like at Groove Train and a house club night at Ministry. Groove Train’s a lot smaller and Ministry is a superclub, so it depends on what you want to do?’
She really just wanted to lie down and have a long sleep. But then she remembered her new mantra. ‘The superclub, I guess?’
It was past midnight by the time they got into Ministry of Sound but between the wine and the thumping house music Sarah found herself spinning with the energy inside. And Jeremy was right, the club was super. The enormous room heaved with dancing bodies everywhere. Jeremy bought them drinks and they joined the throng.
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