Indulgence

by Liz Crowe

  Walking over, I hook an arm through Cam’s as we walk through the doors. “Well, where to?” I ask since I know she grew up here.

  “Down the street is a great store where we can get you in some leather and something that will show off that tatt! You’re not coverin’ that up. Landon needs to see that shit!”

  “I can’t just walk in there like I am perfect after everything that happened Cam!” I shriek.

  She stops on the sidewalk staring at me like I am crazy. “Oh yes, you damn well will. I told you men are visual. If he sees that you don’t give two fucks that he flaunted shit in your face like he did then that’s only going to fuel him. But… If you flaunt your shit, show the world you’re Grayson’s now, because, honey, you are,” she says with a wink. “Then that’ll show him what he lost out on, because fuck him for being so damn stupid to give you up so easily. What did Landon expect you to do? You have this explosive chemistry with Gray that could start wildfires. You two are so damn hot together, I swear they’ll be fining you for contributing to Global Warming. Landon pretty much did nothing but push you right to Gray; he has no right to complain. Even if you walked right on stage and stuck your tongue down his throat; which I’d never do, but hey if it turns you on go for it.”

  “Speaking of which, what’s the deal with you the last couple days?” I ask.

  Cam immediately tenses. “What?”

  “You know what I mean. I watch while you freak out over thinking you’re gonna strip at a club if we had lost that bet; then you nearly beat a bitch at the club for talking shit, which I do get. I totally would’ve fucked her up if she’d touched Gray. You tell me all about your relationship with Aiden, while saying you’re bolting on him. I get that you don’t want the limelight, but, shit Cam, you have to take what you want. You want Aiden.”

  “I do want Aiden,” she says, jerking my arm, pulling me with her as she walks. “I love him. I want him so badly that I fuckin’ ache in my goddamn bones at the thought of leaving him. That’s why I have to, Daisy. He cares about me but he doesn’t love me like that. He’s my Dom, or whatever label you want to slap on our pretty little box; he has to protect me, cherish me, and see to my needs.” Stopping at the edge of the road, she throws her hands up in the air. “That doesn’t mean that he loves me and that most definitely doesn’t make me the woman that can take being flaunted in front of everyone as his girl, while everyone falls all over him. They lust over him all the while whispering how unworthy of him I am. I can’t take that, Daisy. It makes me crazy to be here with him but never wholly have him. I won’t, because he isn’t ready to settle down. Fuck, I wouldn’t believe him if he said he was.”

  “Well, for now, I’ll let you have this, Cam; but when you and Aiden are screaming your undying love for one another from the rooftops…” I say with a shrug. “I’m sayin’ I told ya so,” I add, nudging her with my hip. “Now, when are you plannin’ the great escape?”

  “I don’t know. It was supposed to be a full month but shit is getting’ heavy. It gets harder to leave him every day,” she chokes trying to hold back the sobs in her throat.

  “Alright,” I huff, knowing I have to let the subject go for now. “Let’s go get some hot shit to wear. We have a Shaft concert to rock!” She relaxes then bumps my fist.

  “Come on, Daisy, you have a fuckin’ red leather mini in your future, maybe even some thigh high black boots. Gray is in so much trouble when I’m done with you,” Cam says with a huge smile then drags me into the store.

  She isn’t wrong either. Here I am standing at the mirror in a red leather mini that barely covers my ass with a black tank top that my tits nearly jump out of, because it’s cut so damn low. Of course, Cam finds the hottest damn black boots ever. They go all the way up to my thigh and have a four inch heel. “Gray is going to die…after he comes in his pants!” she says, walking out in a cheetah print halter dress. Cam nearly falls over as she hops from foot to foot putting on five inch silver stilettos.

  “The guys are so screwed. We’re goin’ to rock this shit so hard!” I say, sliding on my leather jacket while the cashier runs my credit card. Once she has our stuff bagged up, we hurry back to the hotel to get ready for tonight.

  After primping for, possibly, an hour too long, top it off with having a dumbass for a taxi driver, we finally arrive at the small arena that the guys are playing at tonight. We really wanted to be there in time to be with them in the staging room, but Vegas traffic is crazy as hell after the sun starts going down.

  Henry waves us in with a wink, showing us the way down the hall to the staging area. “You ladies look beautiful,” he says, opening the door for us.

  “Thank you, Henry,” we both say in unison.

  All of the air is sucked out of the room when I meet Gray’s eyes from where he is sitting on the couch. His gaze starts at my toes then moves seductively up to my face. He spins his fingers in a circle so I turn for him, making him growl in approval. I watch as he stands to his feet, taking him in. He’s wearing his tight black jeans with a plain white t-shirt. The sexy tattoos that I love so much are flirting with me through the thin fabric, as I make my way over to him.

  “You look so fuckin’ edible it should be a crime.” His voice oozes sex with every word, making me stumble as I reach him.

  “Why, Sex and Sin, you don’t look so bad yourself,” I tease, sliding my hands up his arms.

  “Sex and Sin, huh?” Hunter asks, from the couch looking Gray over carefully. “You’ve obviously never had real sex or sin if that’s what you call him.”

  My eyes meet his over Gray’s shoulder. “So, Cunter, how’d it go after we left last night?”

  His eyes light up. “I made four hundred bucks. Then I blew every damned cent on a hotel room, some good booze and a red-headed bitch named Chase. That crazy bitch stole my fuckin’ balls when she left me sleepin’ in the bed.”

  “You paid her?” I ask biting my lip to keep from laughing.

  Hunter laughs, “Fuck no. I paid to get her drunk then I fucked that pussy so hard I think we broke some records. I told her to call Guinness but she passed out after she came on my face.”

  Gray turns us so that he can look at Hunter, “What the hell?”

  “Bitch will never forget my name. I’d bet anything. Too bad I’ll never see her again,” he says, scratching his chin.

  Gray nuzzles my neck. The feel of his stubble, all rough and scratchy against my skin makes my legs wobble. Aiden and Cam are lost in their own little world in the corner. Aiden’s forgotten chicken wings sitting on the table in front of them while he mauls her face.

  “Hunter…” I mumble. “If we ever run into Chase again, I’ll bet you she’d say you weren’t that memorable,” I say taunting him. “I bet you she won’t even remember you.”

  “Oh, you got a bet, baby. Name your terms,” he says, standing to his feet tossing a beer bottle into the trash can.

  I wink at Gray, “Alright then. Hunter, if I win this you have to wear a dress the next time we go to a diner.”

  Hunter doubles over in laughter, “Okay, babe. If you win, you can even put makeup on me if that gets you off.” Straightening, he meets my eyes, his face completely serious. “If I win I get a kiss.”

  Gray’s eyes snap to his, “The fuck if you do. That mouth is not goin’ anywhere near yours, asshole.”

  Hunter grin spreads wickedly, “Who said anything about kissin’ her mouth?”

  “Fuck you!” Gray roars, making Hunter jump back and hold up his hands in surrender.

  “Just playin’, dude. Chill the fuck out.”

  “Hunter, if you win I will stock the bus with a week’s worth of bacon. That I will cook for you,” I blurt.

  Hunter’s eyes go wide, “As much as I can eat?” he asks. I just nod. He jumps up and down like a little kid with a huge smile. “I never tell bitches I love them, but I fuckin’ love you.” Grabbing me from Gray, he swings me in his arms. “Go buy that pig, Daisy. I have a Tiger Lily to find.”
r />   “Not now you don’t, dickhead,” Aiden says as his phone dings. “We have to go give Vegas the Shaft.”

  As usual, Henry escorts Cam and I to left stage, where we take our places on our stools. I haven’t heard anything from Landon, which makes me think that he is going to dodge me. I glance out onto the stage as I listen to the crowd chant for Shaft. This is the biggest venue they have played, but they aren’t nervous at all. I watch as the three guys charge the stage as if they owned it; although in this moment they do. Hunter’s voice surrounds us all as he sings. The crowd goes absolutely wild when Aiden throws his shirt then dives into a drum solo.

  “Aiden motherfuckin’ Chesterfield thumpin’ the skins for you Las Vegas!” Hunter yells into the mic. “Now bend over and grab your knees, babe, you’re about to get Shafted!”

  We scream along with the audience as they rock the hell out of the show, song after song. Grayson is flawless with every chord. Every time his eyes meet mine he winks at me, grinding against his guitar. Memories from the first night I watched him play flood my mind. I mean, it’s only been almost two weeks! So much has happened since then that I almost don’t feel like the same person. I feel my old life slipping away, almost like I am escaping into this new life I could have. I feel like I can almost grab either one. I can go back to the safe, secure life I had before. I could go home right now but what would I be leaving behind? Do I want to go back to that or do I want the crazy, fast paced life that I can have with Gray? My feelings for him are growing into things that I never expected. I keep pushing it out of my head but it keeps creeping back up on me more powerful each time.

  I watch as Gray steps up to the mic. This time, Hunter and Aiden stay where they are instead of leaving him alone to perform. “Alright, here’s a special treat just for you Vegas,” Gray purrs into the mic. His voice curls around me as if he were speaking only to me. The audience is going absolutely nuts, loving the special attention they are getting. “Now, usually I play alone when I do a cover but the guys want to help me out tonight.”

  Gray shreds into an intro as Aiden thumps the beat, his leg slamming the pedal so hard I worry it will go through the floor. Gray’s voice comes in just as Hunter carries the bass line. The words to ‘Lifeline by Papa Roach’ hitting me head on, as I sit on the stool pinned by Gray’s eyes as he sings. The emotion pouring from his voice about how he pushed out the ones he loved never letting anyone in. How I got to him when he didn’t expect it, shattering all his defenses.

  Cam grabs my hand, “He’s singing to you!” she says, jumping to her feet, pulling me along with her.

  Letting go, I scream along with her and the thousands of fans in the audience as they end the song. “Thank you Vegas, you fuckin’ rock! Now that we have you all primed ‘n ready how about you give it up for No Approval!”

  Walking over, Aiden grabs his shirt then throws it along with his sticks into the crowd. Cam leaps onto Aiden making him wobble back into the wall as she kisses him hard. My phone vibrates in my boot as Gray wraps his arms around me from behind. Leaning down, I rub against him as I slip it from the zipper.

  30 minutes

  @ hotel

  Room 6732

  Gray reads the text over my shoulder as he rolls his hips against me. “You ready then?” he asks, grabbing my hand. “The sooner this shit is talked out…the sooner we get back to my plan for the week.” Of course I know that he is right. I need closure but the fact that Landon and I will be face to face for the first time in days has my stomach churning. I wasn’t very nice to him the last time we were together. I mean, yeah, he deserved it but I threw my ring at him, hugged him then told him that he wasn’t welcome in my bed. I can only hope he plans to be civil with me like I hope to be with him.

  Gray and I are silent the entire ride back to the hotel. Henry talks with Hunter about plans for later while Cam and Aiden are attacking each other in the backseat. After we part ways in the lobby, Gray takes the elevator with me to the thirteenth floor where according to the front desk room 6732 is located. Is it a coincidence that it’s the same floor as our room? “She said it’s down at the end of the hall on the left,” Gray says, entwining our fingers as we walk.

  At the end of the hall there is an enormous window overlooking the strip with a bench. “Go have a seat. This shouldn’t take long,” I say kissing his cheek.

  He eyes the room where the door stands cracked. “Are you sure you wanna do this alone, baby? I’ll go in with you. I won’t say a word.”

  I shake my head. “No. I can do this. I’ll leave the door open too.”

  He slumps to the bench as I walk over and tap on the door. I hear a noise, Landon left the door open for me; so I walk in. “Landon?” I call out from the living room of the suite. I hear a groan from the other side of the door which must be the bedroom. Is Landon drunk? I hear something slam to the floor jarring me to action. I fling open the door to my own personal naked clusterfuck nightmare.

  Landon is tied to the bed as some blonde is riding him like the damn rodeo clown her makeup suggests that she is. I watch in horror as Tad’s eyes meet mine. His smile meets his eyes as he thrusts into her ass making her scream. “See Landon, Daisy can’t give you what I can. She doesn’t want anything to do with our relationship does she? She couldn’t be a part of this.”

  “No I can’t,” I shout from the door making everyone jump except Tad. “Landon you bastard! Why did you even ask me to come here?” I scream. “Haven’t you proven your point? Luckily, my heart can’t be broken by you.”

  Landon’s eyes fly open in shock as he sees me. The woman’s hands are running along his chest as he stares at me. “Daisy! No. This isn’t what you think?” he shouts, yanking at his restraints, the headboard rattles as he tries to get free from underneath them. Tad doesn’t stop, he just slams into her again. She loses her balance falling into Landon’s face. “Fuck! Let me up, damn it! Tad!”

  “Go straight to hell, Landon. I never want to see you again,” I shout forcing myself not to be sick at the sight of yet another betrayal. I slam the door behind me as Landon screams for me to stop. Running up the hall my rage blurring my vision. I just need to get away from here. Away from them. I don’t even see Grayson when I crash into his chest so hard that I nearly fall.

  “What the fuck did he say to you? I’ll kill that son of a bitch,” Gray roars sounding murderous.

  “Get me out of here,” I manage to stutter through my tears just as the woman screams out Landon’s name.

  Gray’s eyes blaze as he eyes the door. The blonde is bringing it home matched by male grunts. Gray releases me once I am steady then starts down the hall toward the bedroom. There is no doubt in my mind what he plans to do. I yank his hand, pulling him back to me. “Please Gray. Take me out of here. I don’t want a fight. It’s over. It didn’t take a conversation with him to get my closure.” I tuck into his side as Gray walks me out of the suite.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Exploits of the Drunk and Shameless

  I go into complete robotic mode. In the elevator I nod when he asks if I am okay; nodding again when he asks if I want to go eat. I walk into the restaurant downstairs on a mission. I slide into the booth immediately ordering a screwdriver. “Make it a double,” I shout as the waitress walks away.

  “Do you want to talk about it?” Gray asks sliding in next to me.

  The silence is deafening. Gray sits there holding my hand waiting for me to speak. “Nope. I do not want to talk about walking in on my ex tied to a bed with some goddamn whore on his dick. I also do not want to talk about the fact that while she is riding my ex, Tad was fuckin’ her in the ass,” I say just as the waitress sits my drink in front of me. I grab the glass, sucking down half of it in one swallow. “Go ahead and bring me another one of these please,” I huff as the liquor heats my entire body.

  “Why the fuck would he ask you to come speak to him just to have you walk in on that?” Gray asks furiously. I watch his face contort, his mouth a hard line, his
eyes hard and angry. He clenches his fist in his lap. I know he wants to rip him apart, so do I; but what good would that do? Besides make me feel better for a minute but I’d rather beat Tad’s ass instead. The thought of this all going on behind my back, all this time, is making me a complete wreck. I am pissed off. Disgusted at the fact that he wants to keep flaunting it in my face; but, surprisingly, I’m relieved that I know it is over. I was worried he would beg me to come back. Something that I didn’t know how to answer because I couldn’t have lived the way Tad and Landon wanted. I also know that I can’t just walk away from Gray either. It never would have worked with Landon. I can’t be what he needs me to be. I won’t be that woman.

  “To try to hurt me I guess. I told him he couldn’t break my heart. Said he couldn’t hurt me… Maybe it’s his way of showing me that I’ll never be enough for him? I honestly don’t know, Gray. I also just decided that I don’t fucking care,” I mutter into my glass, then down the last of it.

  “They’re both fired. Aiden drafted up letters of dismissal this afternoon. Henry delivered them while we were practicing. It’s done.”

  I nod, waving my hand in the air vaguely acknowledging him. The waitress exchanges my empty glass with a filled one. I smile, promising her a huge tip if she keeps a full glass in my hand. She nods then winks at Gray. Of course this shit makes me see red. “Bitch, I hope it’s worth it because I’ll fuck you up if you even try,” I bite out not even meeting her eyes.

  Gray laughs, “Don’t take offense she’s had a rough night,” he says, handing her a few bills. Pulling me to my feet he walks me out to the street. “We need to get your mind off of Landon and back where it belongs. That shit’s over. New plan, new list remember? Tell me, what do you want to do right now? Anything you want Wildflower you name it.”

  Turning, I pull him against me in the middle of the crowded sidewalk. People are shoving around us as I stare into his eyes, my lips just brushing his as I tell him exactly what I want. “Gray, all I want is to get drunk and fuck you until we can’t walk. It’s a good thing that you have three days until your next show. You’ll spend it recovering.”