Toothy was being tackled by Khalilah when her dentures fell out of her pocket and bounced off the ball. Khalilah took one look at the set of teeth sitting in their own puddle ofsaliva before squealing and running away. The older woman scooped up the offending item with a gappy grin and shunted the ball to Goldilocks, who headed the ball to the General with a grimace. While Goldilocks readjusted her hair, the General dribbled the ball toward Chuckles who was holding her sides from laughing at Goldilock’s “hair” which had come off. She laughed even harder at Alana’s attempts to tackle. Alana tried to elbow forward to gain some leverage but Chuckles shut her down with an inside-cut and swerved away, flipping the ball onto her knee in a move that was clearly just for show, before spinning around and kicking it away with her heel - backward.
“Congratulations, Lucy,” James said to the General after forty minutes. “You’ve still got your magic! Thanks for coming in today, ladies. I know the girls learned a lot.”
The Gibson Gibbons left after sheepishly shaking hands with the soccer matriarchs. There was a new respect in the girls’ eyes and they slunk off the field with heads bowed, jerseys drooping around their shoulders to commiserate over the humiliating defeat. It was an emphatic lesson no one would forget in a hurry.
“Have they gone?” asked Lucy the General to Hearing-Aid. She stood ramrod straight, teeth chewing the end of her cigar with resolute ferocity.
“Are we on?” Hearing-Aid said.
“No! HAVE THEY GONE?” Lucy shouted.
“Who? The girls?” Chuckles asked, putting on her bifocals before checking behind the General’s shoulder. “Yeah, they’re gone.”
“And James?”
“Yep.”
The General crumpled at the announcement. She leant on Chuckles’ arm as she massaged her hip. “I think I put my hip out again, darn it.”
“Ooh, my knees!” Toothy groaned.
“That’s the last time I’m listening to one of your crackpot ideas,” complained Goldilocks, “hair” still askew.
“What?” said Hearing-Aid.
“I said, ‘Never again,’” said Goldilocks loudly in Hearing-Aid’s ear.
“Ohhh! Enjoy Phnom Penh!” Hearing-Aid nodded, shouting back. “But I don’t think I’ll be going anywhere.” She stretched painfully. “I think I did my back in.”
Goldilocks patted Hearing-Aid on the shoulder with a wry smile.
Then the Falcons limped offthe field, fantasizing about bath salts and massages and being forty years younger.
CHAPTER 25
Still dead
It is time to look at the body again. You know you want to. It's only natural. To be curious. They say curiosity killed the cat but we both know that's not true. It was a python.
The first thing you'll notice about the body is that it has been turned over. Like a slice of meat that needs searing on both sides. It is such a little thing, this change in position, but it is a critical turning point - pardon the pun - because the first thing that hits you about the body is not its wide hips, or slight curve to the shoulders which suggest a stoop, but its hairstyle.
A bun.
Note, I said bun, not buns, so you can move your eyes up now.
The bun is white. It is as big and as round as an apple, now that it is no longer squashed against the coffee table surface. Like a Christmas ornament covered completely in snow.
Who is this person?
Well, she ain't no Sleeping Beauty, that's for sure.
CHAPTER 26
Pretty little lies
Soccer practice improved dramatically after their crushing defeat against the Falcons. The same, unfortunately, could not be said of Alana and Flynn’s friendship which, according to Maddie, had reached subzero.
“Brrrr, it’s not even winter yet, but I feel a definite cold snap,” said Sofia, eyeing Flynn and Alana as they pointedly ignored each other during their free period. Flynn headed for the reference section, face averted, while Alana picked a random book on the table and pretended a sudden interest in sedimentary rocks.
“Yeah,” agreed Khalilah through her raspberry specs, “I think it’s what you call a microclimate.’”
“Well, she sure is cute and little,” Maddie agreed with a smirk, patting Alana’s head which was now considerably lower than her own. Alana growled.
“Uh-oh,” Sofia said, placing a warning hand on Maddie’s arm, “I’m sensing a storm front.”
Alana pointedly ignored her friends as she read the paragraph on “lithification” for the third time. She wondered what Flynn was doing here, and whether he was still mad at her. Around the corner from where Alana sat, Flynn was looking blankly at a book on entomology ... written in Spanish.
“G’day, Mate! Or should I say, hola amigo?” Jefri said to Flynn after a quick glance at the heavy volume in Flynn’s hands.
“Oh, hey, Jefri,” Flynn said glumly, replacing the reference book on the shelf.
“Call me wacko but you don’t look like a happy little Vegemite,” Jefri said. “What’s up, Possum?”
Flynn looked at Jefri’s gentle face and felt an inexplicable urge to confide in him. Half the time he had no idea what Jefri was talking about, but Flynn knew the boy’s heart was in the right place.
“I just don’t get some people, y’know? One day they act like they’re your friend and then maybe even more than a friend, and then you find out they think you’re completely lame, and it’s... I dunno...” Flynn’s eyes were drawn to where Alana sat reading as he trailed off.
Jefri followed his gaze and a look of understanding entered his eyes. Khalilah had told him of the on-again, off-again relationship between her two friends. “Leave it with me, Possum,” and before Flynn could do or say anything to stop him, Jefri walked over to his sister and her friends.
“Hey Alana,” he whispered loudly, “Flynn was thinking of chucking a sickie and wanted to know if you were up for it.”
“Who, Alana? Ditch class? Are you crazy?” Khalilah asked, shaking her head in disbelief.
“I’m being fair dinkum, completely true blue,” Jefri held his hand up like a scout.
“This is Alana we’re talking about, the scholarship student and don’t-touch-my-books-because-they’re-in-alphabetical-order-psycho-chick,” Maddie explained to Jefri patiently.
But Alana was already gathering her things. Maybe Flynn had forgiven her, or was at least willing to listen to an apology. Either way, she wasn’t going to miss this opportunity. Sofia was quick to pick up on her friend’s feelings. She’d always suspected there was the possibility of romance for Alana and Flynn and now here was a chance. Alice may have created a wedge between them, but Sofia was confident Alana and Flynn could get back on track. Which is why, she explained later, she kicked Alana’s chair from under her.
“What th-?!” Alana spluttered from the library floor.
“You can thank me later,” Sofia said in Alana’s ear as she helped her sit up.
Jefri was already dragging Flynn to the scene. “Holy dooley, Flynn! You have to take Alana to see Nurse Cathy! It looks like she’s come a cropper!”
Alana gave a start. Skipping class so she could explain herself to Flynn was one thing. Voluntarily visiting the clinic was something else. “It’s not that bad, I’m fine. Oww!” she yelled, glaring at Sofia.
Sofia removed her foot from Alana’s fingers. “Stop being so proud, Alana,” she admonished. Sofia looked at Flynn with a roll of her eyes that said: She is so stubborn.
Flynn looked around the table.
“Sorry, I can’t take her.” Maddie said, finally cottoning on. “I’ve got violin.”
“Don’t look at me,” said Sofia, “Miller and I are working on the Fibonacci sequence. Woohoo! #Fibonacci totes epic! Right, Miller?” she called out to Miller across the room with a pump of her arm. Miller looked both confused and excited.
Flynn looked at Khalilah who shook her head with regret. “I’m sorry Flynn. I’ve got Malay.”
Flynn’s eyes
narrowed. “Huh? I thought you were Malay?”
Jefri cut in. “She means we have Malay tutoring.” When Flynn looked unconvinced, Jefri shrugged.
“What can I say? We’re a pair of dags.”
“Hey, speak for yourself.” Khalilah exclaimed.
“Quickly! You’s better nick off before someone catches you bludging,” Jefri warned, and it was no idle threat. Already the librarian could be heard stomping in their direction.
As soon as the pair had gone, Jefri’s face slipped into an easy grin. “My oath, but I’m good!”
Khalilah shook her head as she exchanged incredulous glances with Maddie and Sofia. “My brother a matchmaker? Now I’ve seen everything!”
CHAPTER 27
A change of heart
Alana refused to go to the clinic so she convinced Flynn they could wait it out until their next class, in one of the inner gardens. Alana knew she had to explain what had happened with Alice but she didn’t know where to start. At least not without having to also explain why.
“Coltrane isn’t too bad,” Alana offered to the silence that had settled between them.
Flynn raised an eyebrow. “Not too bad?”
“Okay, he’s pretty amazing,” she conceded.
Flynn gestured with his hand to draw higher praise from Alana, praise that he knew had to come.
“Alright, alright, Coltrane is incredible,” Alana sighed, as if the admission was akin to a tooth extraction.
Flynn nudged her shoulder. “Yeah, he is.”
The strident sound of the bell signaled the start of their next class. Even though Flynn and Alana made their way to the Police Boys’ Club slowly, they were still the first ones to arrive. Alana felt tongue-tied and awkward. Although she couldn’t stand ballroom dancing, Alana was almost looking forward to Will’s icy touch. Perhaps it could cool Alana’s cheeks which she knew were blazing brighter than a bushfire. But even that hope was dashed when Mrs. Cronenberg announced a change of partners.
“You and you,” she said, pushing two students together, “and you and you,” she continued. On and on down the line until only Alana, Khalilah, Miller, and Flynn were left. “Hmmm,” Mrs. Cronenberg said thoughtfully. A mental eenie, meenie, minie, mo made her eyes flick from one to the other. Alana stared at her feet. Flynn stared at Alana, while Khalilah stared at Mrs. Cronenberg’s towering headpiece. Today it was a mountain of brightly colored fruit, donuts, and iced confections. Mrs. Cronenberg shot Khalilah a nervous glance before pairing Alana with Miller. Alana breathed a silent prayer of thanks a minute too soon. “No, no. On second thought...” With a satisfied nod, she replaced Alana’s trembling hand within Flynn’s instead.
Mrs. Cronenberg’s voluminous skirts swept away and the familiar strains of the waltz began. Alana crushed Flynn’s foot under a heavy black boot with her first step.
“Sorry,” she mumbled.
“No, my fault,” Flynn said, a hint of a smile in his voice, “I was too slow.”
They began again, this time Flynn deftly slipping his feet from under Alana’s before she had time to squash them. It was not the waltz. It looked more like a game of Snap played with feet where neither opponent wanted to win.
“Relax,” Flynn urged, shaking Alana’s hand lightly in his.
But relaxing wasn’t something Alana could do. Her mouth felt like the Sahara Desert and all her body fluids seemed to have migrated to her underarms. How did Mrs. Cronenberg expect Alana to count time, move gracefully, remember the steps, and not throw up on everyone’s shoes?
Alana looked around the room wildly. Khalilah and Miller were stepping neatly, if not a bit woodenly, in a square. Maddie and Jefri had given up on the waltz and were doing a bush dance whenever Mrs. Cronenberg wasn’t looking, and Sofia and Will were dancing cheek-to-cheek. Alana saw a flash of white. Was that a fang emerging from Will’s mouth? She stumbled forward in a panic and smashed into Sofia and Will who were jolted apart.
“Are you okay, Alana?” Flynn asked, concerned.
Alana craned her neck to check on Sofia. Both she and Will had resumed dancing, this time a respectable distance apart. Alana breathed a sigh of relief. “Je suis tres bien,” she said automatically, lapsing into French as they had done over the summer. I’m fine. Alana looked Flynn in the eye. “Je suis désolé.” I’m sorry. Somehow saying sorry in French was so much easier than saying it in English. “For all that stuff I said to Alice, before. None of it was true.”
Flynn pulled her out of the way as Maddie and Jefri do-si-doed past, bringing their bodies even closer. “So if John Coltrane is incredible, what does that make me?” he asked.
“Conceited,” Alana shot back, a twinkle in her eye.
Flynn squeezed her hand and held it, even after the music had stopped and it was time to go. The pair of them grinned goofily at each other, and then Alana smiled into her chest. Maybe everything was going to be okay.
Khalilah’s head appeared between Flynn and Alana’s. “Call me a ding bat, but I reckon we’re in for a heatwave.” Khalilah fanned Alana’s flushed face with her hand and beamed.
“You see,” protested Jefri, “you do talk like that, here,” to which Khalilah left the amused pair to chase her brother.
“They’re just movies! None of it is real!”
CHAPTER 28
A night to remember
Alana and her friends decided to celebrate the end-of-first-term break with a trip to the movies. In light of Dr. Olivier’s English and drama class, everybody was keen to go to the Pan-Asian Short Film Festival at the local arthaus theater, The Dendy, especially as this year’s theme was horror. At least everybody started out keen, until one by one, they bailed.
“Mom says we’re completely booked out. She said I can go, but I know they’ll find it hard to do it without me...” Sofia moaned.
Alana gave her friend a hug. “I’ll help, too,” she offered.
“No,” Sofia protested. “It’s okay. Miller’s already coming. Plus, I need you to tell me what happens.” Alana shook her head in dismay. Sofia routinely read the ending of books first and sought out “spoiler alerts.”
Khalilah and Jefri were the next to cancel. Alana could barely recognize her friend’s voice on the phone. “Jefri hath pathed on hith thtupid cold,” Khalilah croaked down the line, congested. “Perfect timing for the holidayth!” She sounded bitterly disappointed. Horror movies were her favorite. Especially the ones filmed in Thailand, which were so over the top, they were really comedies.
“Shall I drop over? Do you need anything? Cough drops? Chicken soup?” Alana said, concerned. The sound of violent hacking in the background muffled Khalilah’s reply.
“Arghh! Thtop coughing on me! You’re thpreading your germth everywhere,” Alana heard Khalilah scold. “Don’t come over! Thethe germth are lethal,” Khalilah warned. “Muuum! Abang, ith thtealing my cream bun!” Khalilah yelled. “Thorry, Lana, gotta go,” and after a wet splutter in Alana’s ear, she was gone.
Alana was already waiting outside the cinema when Maddie’s text message came through.
“Babysittg. Rainchk. 4giv me?”
“Yeah, right,” Alana muttered. Maddie was most likely practicing for the orchestra auditions which were coming up soon. If she’d really wanted to come tonight, there were any number of aunts, uncles and cousins she could have called on for help.
Which just left...
“Flynn! Hi!” Alana’s stomach performed a familiar triple somersault at the sight of him. Jeans hugged his lanky frame and a plain black T-shirt, once baggy, now clung to his form - Flynn had filled out considerably over the summer. He smiled a greeting and ran impatient fingers through his unruly mop of hair. Alana’s hands itched to pull it back from his face so she could see his eyes. She wondered what kind of gray they were tonight. Stormy, with a hint of purple? Or slate with a tinge of blue? She remembered, vaguely, a time when she thought Flynn was nothing but an unkempt slob. Alana dropped her eyes. Things seemed very different now. Alana rubb
ed her hands down the leg of her own jeans and plucked nervously at her favorite Jimi Hendrix T-shirt — a birthday present from her friends, last year. “It looks like it’s just you and me,” she apologized in a rush. “Sofia and Miller are working at Brothers, Khalilah and Jefri are down with a cold, and ...”
Bloodsuckers and Blunders Page 8