by Obert Skye
Bouncer looked bothered, and his eyes were squintier than ever.
As the tram clicked along the track, I felt more and more uncomfortable. The mist brushed past like it had fingers. The windows clotted with moisture.
The tram eased into a big, abandoned tram station and shuddered to a stop near a large wooden platform. I made a move to get out, but the tram door was locked.
“No,” Bouncer said firmly. “We won’t be getting out.”
“Why?”
“It’s not wise.”
I rubbed the water off the window and peered out through the circle I’d made. I could see that the station was completely dilapidated. The platform was splintered and falling apart. The ticket booth looked like someone had taken a hammer to all its windows. The stairs that led down were weed-covered and rickety looking.
“Can we just look around a little?” Zeke asked. “I promise we won’t touch anything.”
“No!” Bouncer was serious. “I’m not worried about you touching things. Let’s just say that ever since the sanctuary closed, the rabbits in here have taken on a passive-aggressive nature. Emphasis on aggressive. They don’t come out unless they are bothered or hungry. Sometimes they tolerate humans; sometimes they don’t. It’s best to leave them be.”
“Should we even be here?” Juliet asked.
“Who’s to say?” Bouncer said. “Of course, Lady Beatrice wouldn’t have had me bring you out if it were truly dangerous. Besides, I have a net gun on board. If any rabbits get out of hand, I can corral them with that.”
“A net gun?” I said excitedly. “Admiral Uli’s sister, Julie, has a wet blanket gun. She can shoot it on anything to ruin the fun.”
Bouncer stared at me for a long moment before he continued talking.
“Anyway, Lady Beatrice just thought it would be a treat for you all to see this old place. It’s a spot most people will never see. Furassic Park now belongs to the rabbits. We should return to the house. Dinner should be ready shortly.”
“I remember it being much nicer,” Zeke said. “It was so alive before; now it seems dead.”
“Oh, I assure you it very much isn’t.”
Bouncer turned the tram back on and then pulled the lever back so we would move in the reverse direction we had come. When the cart didn’t move, he wiggled the lever back and forth a few times. When that did nothing, he cursed and then turned the engine off.
“Please excuse my language and the delay,” he apologized. “If you’ll all just remain seated.”
Bouncer got up and opened the door.
“Should you bring your net gun?” I asked.
“That won’t be necessary,” he replied.
Bouncer stepped out of the tram cart and walked to the front of it, where he opened up a large panel and began to tinker with something.
“This is weird, right?” Juliet asked.
“I think so,” I answered her. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say Bouncer was a Newt.”
“I don’t think you know any better,” Rain pointed out. “He’s just a weird butler who has hair growing out of his ears.”
“It wasn’t that long ago when you were half bunny and had hairy ears growing out of your head,” I reminded Rain.
Rain touched the top of his head and didn’t say anything.
“I do wish he’d let us walk around.” Zeke was busy looking out the windows as he spoke. “I’d love to explore it now. It looks so different from the last time I saw it.”
“It reminds me of the sharktuary,” I said. “The one in the special-edition Ocean Blasterzoids: Humpback of No Return. What was that whale’s name?”
“Humpty Wumpty,” Zeke said.
Rain shook his head. “You two should get out more.”
“I’m going to see if Bouncer needs help,” my uncle said as he opened the door and stepped out.
“I’m coming with you,” I said, hurrying out after him.
I thought Juliet and Rain would follow me, but they didn’t. I stood next to my uncle as he stood next to Bouncer as Bouncer messed with some wires on the front of the tram.
“Can you see the problem?” Zeke asked.
I thought my uncle was making a joke about how squinty Bouncer’s eyes were, but if he was, Bouncer didn’t get it.
“I do see the problem,” he said. “Occasionally, bunnies get into the wiring and chew through things. I’ll have it fixed in a second. You two should get back inside.”
“It seems safe enough out here,” I pointed out.
“Things aren’t always what they seem.” Bouncer twisted two wires together. “Now, if you’ll get back inside, I’m almost—”
Bouncer stopped talking, and I could hear the faint sound of something clicking.
“Is that the tram?” I asked.
“No,” Bouncer said. “Get inside the cart—quickly.”
The clicking grew louder, and it was now followed by the sound of something pounding.
It was Zeke’s turn to ask a question. “What is that?”
I turned to look and I couldn’t believe my eyes. At the edge of the wooden platform were thousands of bunnies. They were beating their feet against the ground and clicking their teeth.
“Get in!” Bouncer insisted.
Juliet pulled open the door and all three of us pushed in. Rain was standing in the tram looking out at the rabbits.
“There’s so many,” he said.
“That’s true. And since they rarely see people, they can be a bit overly affectionate.” Bouncer moved to the controls and started the tram. It came to life, but when he pulled the lever back nothing happened. “Whiskers,” he cursed. “We need to give it a push start. A few good shoves should kick it into action and get the cables pulling us back home.”
“I’ll do it,” Zeke volunteered.
“It’ll take all four of you,” Bouncer said with authority. “I’d help, but I have a bad back. Hurry.”
As he spoke, I saw him smile ever so slightly.
Before I could say anything, we all piled out of the tram as quickly as we could, leaving Bouncer inside with the door open. The four of us jumped onto the tracks at the front of the tram and tried to push it in the direction we had come. But it was too heavy. We couldn’t get it to move.
“Harder!” Zeke said.
We groaned and pushed again.
“The rabbits!” Juliet yelled.
I looked away from the tram and saw the mass of rabbits drawing closer, their chattering and thumping growing louder and louder by the moment.
“Push!” I hollered.
The tram lurched forward and began to move down the tracks inch by inch, but the engine still wouldn’t start.
We moaned and struggled and pushed with all our might.
The thumping and chattering were now joined by the sound of chirping. I’ve never known rabbits to chirp, but that’s what they were doing. They were staring at us with their thousands of adorable, angry faces, and chirping.
We pushed again as hard as we could.
The rabbits stopped thumping then and began to slowly jump toward us.
“It’s rolling,” Zeke said. “Get in!”
We all stopped pushing and ran for the door. Rain, Juliet, and Uncle Zeke made it in without a problem, but I tripped and fell to the ground, landing on my face in the gravel next to the track.
“Perry!” Juliet screamed.
I pulled myself up and ran as fast as I could. The rabbits’ thumping became thunderous. The tram engine finally kicked in, and the cart started moving away quickly.
“Faster!” Zeke commanded as he held his arm out of the open door for me to grab.
“I’m not a good runner!” I yelled back.
“Just take my hand!”
I grabbed for my uncle’s hand and missed. I stumbled and fell to the ground again. The rabbits were now right behind me. Zeke jumped out of the tram and ran back to help me. He picked me up and pushed me forward.
“Run, Perry! Run!
”
The tram had seemed to be so slow-moving when we had come, but now it seemed like a rocket. Zeke pushed me as he ran behind. When it became clear that we weren’t going to make it, he picked me up and ran with me under his arm like I was a football. He heaved me in through the open door and jumped in behind me a split second later. Juliet slid the tram cart door shut mere moments before the bunnies smashed against it. Wave after wave of rabbits finally reached us and crashed up over the cart and against the sides. The glass was too slippery for them to hold on to, so the bunnies would hit and then slide slowly to the ground as we made our getaway.
I fell onto the floor of the tram between the seats, exhausted and well aware that things like this never happened to me back in Ohio.
“I thought we were going to be smothered,” Zeke said.
“You really aren’t a strong runner, are you, Perry?” Rain observed.
“I’m better at skipping, remember?” I answered honestly. “What’s up with those rabbits?”
“I’m not the one to ask,” Zeke said.
We all turned our heads to look at Bouncer.
“They are uneasy these days,” he said. “I suppose being studied and experimented on for years has made them a bit hoppy. Who knows how they will act from one day to the next?”
The tram rolled over the moat and out through the gates. I was happy to leave Furassic Park behind us, but my tentacles were tingling. Something about the experience seemed odd and almost set up.
“Why did you take us there?” I asked Bouncer. “We almost got killed!”
“Beatrice asked me to. It’s not my fault the tram stopped working. Most of her visitors love seeing the place. And besides, those rabbits wouldn’t have killed you,” Bouncer said, trying to calm me down. “They might have scratched and bitten, but unless they somehow decided to all work together to suffocate you, you would have been fine. Now, let’s get you all to the house. Dinner should be just about ready.”
Bouncer made me uneasy. Like an honest newt, or a clever salamander, something about him did not seem right.
CHAPTER SIX
DISGUSTING IS SERVED
When we got back to the house, Bouncer led us to a large dining room with a remarkable stained glass window of a rabbit on one end, pink bunny wallpaper on the other walls, and purple carpeting. It hurt my eyes just to be in the room. In the center of the space, there was an enormous table with plates and glasses on it. Bouncer pulled out a chair for Juliet to sit down. I waited for him to help me, but it never happened. So I pulled out my own seat and sat down next to Juliet and Rain. Zeke sat across the table so that all three of us were staring at him.
“Lady Beatrice will be with you shortly,” Bouncer burped.
As soon as he was out of the room, we all began to talk and chatter about how strange the Furassic Park sanctuary had been and how much Bouncer creeped us out.
“I think he wanted us to get attacked,” I whispered. “I saw him smile. He was just pretending the tram didn’t work so we’d get outside of it.”
“I don’t think that’s true,” Zeke said. “I don’t think he’s capable of smiling. Besides, he wanted us to stay in the tram at first.”
It wasn’t like my uncle to not be suspicious. I stared at him, wondering if he was okay.
“What?” he said. “I think Bouncer’s okay.”
“I don’t think the bunnies would have hurt us anyway,” Juliet added. “They weren’t mutant like the ones we dealt with last time.”
“Still . . .” I started to say.
“Still, I bet you’re going to make a big deal out of it,” Rain said nicely. “You always do. Maybe it was some crab or turtle thing you like.”
“I like squids.”
“Whatever,” Rain added.
“Let’s just have a nice dinner and be honored that we were invited,” Zeke suggested.
“Dinners can be deadly,” I insisted. “This meal invitation reminds me of the time when Admiral Uli was invited to dinner at the Halibut House and then nearly got steamed by a knot of naughty newts.”
“See, you’re good at making a big deal of things,” Rain pointed out. “And talking junk.”
“What if she serves us bunny?” I asked.
I gasped at my own words. I hadn’t thought about the fact that Beatrice Hatch would be feeding us anything until right at that moment. Not all food was my friend. In fact, if it wasn’t covered in sugar and fried, I didn’t spend much time with it. Looking around at the stuffy, overgrown house, I could only imagine the old and disgusting things she might make me eat. Creamed liver? Boiled brain? Salads?
I shivered.
“She’s not going to serve bunny.” Juliet scoffed at me. “She likes rabbits, remember? Plus, she’s rich, so the food will probably be good.”
“But . . .” Rain sniffed. “If that smell is coming from whatever she’s cooking, I can tell it’s not going to be good.”
A door opened on the far side of the dining room and Bouncer came out, followed by an old woman. He stopped and motioned toward her with his hands.
“Lady Beatrice Hatch,” he announced.
It sounded like he wanted us to clap, so I did. We all stood up, but nobody else clapped, so I stopped. Rain politely laughed at me, and Juliet looked embarrassed.
“Sorry,” I whispered.
Lady Beatrice stepped all the way into the dining room. She had on a heavy yellow dress that made her look like a large cob of lumpy corn. She had stringy, orange hair and a nose so big that it would make a porpoise jealous. She walked to a chair a few spots away from Zeke, and Bouncer pulled her seat out.
I don’t know how else to say it, but when she sat down, she farted.
Juliet looked at me and I looked at her. We both looked at Rain and then glanced at Zeke, wondering what to do. I wanted to laugh, but I was pretty sure that wasn’t proper etiquette. I know that breaking wind is a part of life; I just have a difficult time not cracking up about it. Admiral Uli also has a weak spot for bathroom humor. Of course, in Ocean Blasterzoids they call it bubbling, not farting.
Bouncer helped Lady Beatrice scoot in and she bubbled again.
We all kept standing because that seemed like good manners even though Mrs. Beatrice herself had just double bubbled. I put my hand over my mouth to keep from laughing.
“Hello, Lady Beatrice,” Zeke said respectfully. “It’s been a long time, but you look lovely.”
I had never heard my uncle lie before.
“Mr. Owens,” she replied. “It has been a while. Please have a seat.”
Zeke sat down, and I kept standing with my friends.
She turned her head and hair to look at me and my friends. “And you are?”
“I’m Juliet.”
“I’m Rain.”
“And I’m Perry.”
“Yes, the three children who saved the day.”
We all just stood there looking as uncomfortable as fish in a hot pan.
“Such bravery.” Another bubble. “Taking on Mayor Lapin like that. You’ve brought a lot of attention to this island. Some good, some bad.”
“Sorry about the bad parts,” I apologized.
“Me, too. You may be seated,” she told us.
We all sat down as she continued to talk.
“Perry, when I heard you were returning to the island I knew I needed to meet you—immediately. I didn’t get the chance to meet you kids when you were here before. I was away on business. And I certainly didn’t want to miss the opportunity this time. I needed to take a long look at you all.” She stared at all of us slowly, her eyes finally resting on me. “You’re here to attend this ugly Carrot Convention?”
Something didn’t feel right. Lady Beatrice was giving me the shrimps. I looked at Zeke to see if maybe he wanted to just make a run for it with me. Beatrice seemed horrible, and she was a bubbler, and the way she talked reminded me of Clam-ity Jane, the first female villain Uli ever tangled with. She was a rich, stubborn clam who had tricked
Uli into giving away the location of his hideout by making him take a pearlygraph test. I didn’t like the way Beatrice looked, and her voice made my squid skin shiver.
“You’re here for the convention?” she asked again, still waiting for my answer. “What’s the matter, Perry? Bunny got your tail?”
I cleared my throat. “Yes, I came for Carrot Con. We’re doing a panel on the last day. I also came early to spend time with my friends first.”
“Ah, friendship, such a lovely thing.” She turned her attention to Rain. “Rain, I believe I know your mother, Flower.”
“I think you do.”
“I know I do. I was just being polite. She runs that little juice shack that helped serve all those smoothies.”
Rain nodded.
“And Juliet, I think your father works at one of my hotels in town.”
“He does.”
“Again, just being polite. No need for you to reply. And Zeke, you haven’t been out to see me in ages.”
“I didn’t think I was welcome anymore.”
“Perhaps you aren’t, but I’m curious about what I hear. You were a bunny for a spell. How envious I am.”
Lady Beatrice bubbled.
“It wasn’t a good thing,” my uncle informed her.
“Well, I’m not sure I agree. I think I’d rather enjoy being a bunny. Such wonderful creatures. Wouldn’t you agree, Perry?”
I wasn’t sure why she was asking me, but I nodded.
“You all saw the sanctuary?”
“A little of it,” Zeke said.
“Well, it is quite vast. I’m glad you got a peek. There are miles of tunnels and hutches. Such a beautiful place. Such a pity it had to close. You can’t keep funding something nobody visits. But enough about sad things. Let’s eat.”
Beatrice picked up a small golden bell that was sitting on the table near her right hand and rang it loudly. All of us plugged our ears.
A door on the other side of the dining room opened and maids came out of the kitchen carrying gold trays with silver domes on them. They set the trays on the far end of the table and began to serve us all. The plates they put in front of us had silver domes over them so that we couldn’t see what they were.
I pulled off the silver dome and almost passed out. It was just as I feared: there, sitting in front of me, was a salad. Not a Jell-O salad, or pudding salad, or even potato salad. It was a pile of leaves and twigs and some carrot shavings. I looked across the table at Zeke and pleaded with my eyes for him to somehow put a stop to this nonsense. He just looked back at me helplessly.