by Gail Haris
“Well, I better go to bed. I’m excited we’re going to be neighbors,” Natalia says as she stands up from the couch.
“Me too, dear, me too.” Lolly gently squeezes Natalia’s hand and kisses it. I watch as Natalia walks toward the hallway. I look back over at Lolly who is staring me right in the eye with her arms crossed shaking her head.
Lolly stands up. “Do you know how hard it was talking you up while you’re creeping around?”
“You knew I was listening?”
“Those big feet clomping around? I’m old, not deaf. Not yet, anyway. She probably heard you too. My dream of playing with great grandchildren is slowly going out the window, along with my sanity.”
“Your sanity left a long time ago, Lolly.”
“Ah, well, nobody’s perfect.” I follow Lolly as she makes her way to the kitchen. “I guess you heard that Natalia is moving across the street. Seth Bohnert is renting to her, and I think he’s going to try and make a pass. If he hasn’t already. She’s taking a liking to him.”
I huff. “She’s a smart woman. I’m sure she’ll see through him soon enough. We don’t need to go meddling in her life.”
“She is smart. Apparently smart enough to not waste her time on you.”
I flinch and grit my teeth. “Good for her.”
Lolly walks over to me and smacks me on the side of the head. “Enough is enough. I love you, Carter Chace Collins, and I refuse to stand by and let you waste your life away. Fight for her! Fight yourself for her. No other man would stand a chance against you. You have it all. You’re a good man, good worker, and loyal to a fault. Face your demons and be brave enough to love again.”
I look into Lolly’s glistening eyes. When I try to speak, nothing comes out. Lolly shakes her head and leaves the room. Natalia is worth fighting for, no doubt, but am I worth it?
Natalia was gone all day yesterday. I didn’t even see her when she went in her bedroom. Not that I was looking. Shit, Lolly was right. I’ve turned into a creeper. The next day I notice a moving truck across the street, along with Seth’s sporty little car. I don’t even realize I’m walking across the street until I hear a car honking its horn. Natalia looks over at me with alarm.
“Are you okay? You were almost roadkill.”
“Yeah.”
Her dark eyebrows pull together and I give my head a little shake. “Sorry, yeah, I haven’t had my coffee and clearly not awake yet. You’re getting moved in, I see. Need an extra set of hands?”
“I won’t turn down help. Especially since you have such strong arms.” Her eyes widen and color tints her cheeks. “I mean…you know. You’re a big guy.”
“That, I am.” I wink.
She bites her lips to fight the smile that spreads anyway.
“Carter Collins! Hey, man.” I turn to Seth as he pats me on the shoulder. “You know, Nat?”
I frown and look to Natalia. “I do know…Nat?” I shake his hand over my shoulder. He always was a little creepy squirt. Why would Natalia even humor him? I move to stand next to Natalia. “She was staying with Lolly.”
“That’s right!” Seth says.
“Carter also saved me when my apartment burned down.” My heart swells at her bringing it up.
Seth’s eyes turn hard as he looks at me. “He is quite the hero. Glad you made it…”
He lets it hang, and I know what he’s implying. This time. Glad you made it…this time. Natalia doesn’t know that Seth and I were always competing in school. Sports and girls. He did get my girl after my parents died. They didn’t last, obviously. Besides, now we’re both adults. While he went with the comfortable office job and goes around taking people’s homes as soon as they can’t afford their payments, I go around getting dirty and trying to save their homes, or what I can, from the fire.
Basically, we hate each other.
I hate him even more than ever before now that he’s set his eyes on Natalia. He must really like her if he’s here helping her move in. Natalia had gone to a furniture store yesterday and ordered some new furniture. The truck arrived and we all began unloading it, with the help of a few other men. I throw my shirt off and I don’t miss how Natalia’s eyes watch me. I also don’t miss the glare from Seth.
Seth nods toward the door, “You know, Collins, if you have things to do, I can call some more guys to come help.”
“Nope.” I smile.
“I didn’t know if there’s a cat in a tree or something you need to tend to.” Saving a cat up a tree? Really, man…that’s so freaking original. He decides to up his game by trying to impress Natalia by moving a recliner on his own. When he begins to lose his footing, I rush over and take it from him.
“Thanks,” he grumbles.
“Don’t worry, man. Saving pussies is all part of the job, right?”
Natalia snickers and lets out an adorable little snort. I carry the recliner, by myself, into the living room. When I turn around, Seth is glaring daggers at me. I wink at Natalia and shoot him a smile as I go to move more of the furniture.
The next few days I still catch myself looking out the bedroom window. I’m surprised with how much I miss her being there. Lolly hasn’t moved back in her bedroom. She said she’s keeping it open just in case Natalia needs to move back in. She misses her too. I try to catch her across the street, but she’s usually gone, already inside, and I’m too much of a coward to go over there and knock. Running in burning buildings is easier than coming up with an excuse to go say hello.
“If you want to see her so bad,” I turn to the sound of Lolly walking across the lawn. “Just come over in the morning for coffee.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You know exactly what I’m talking about. You’re sitting on that porch like a lost dog, waiting for his owner to return. You want her to pet ya, go over there and let her scratch your itch.”
I shake my head. “What? I don’t want her to pet me.” Narrowing my eyes on her, “And don’t compare me to a dog.” I turn back to staring at Natalia’s house, “And don’t ever suggest I go ask someone to scratch my itch. That’s disturbing.”
She shrugs and turns back toward her yard. Lolly calls over her shoulder, “But tomorrow she’s coming over for coffee. See you at six.”
After being called out for a wreck at two in the morning and not getting into bed until four, waking up at six was surprisingly easy. I refuse to think it was the anticipation to visit with Natalia. Hearing her sweet laughter, my hand pauses on the doorknob. My heart beats a little faster, and I take a deep breath to steady my nerves. Why am I nervous? I’m going to have coffee with Lolly. That’s it. Maybe a gorgeous woman with a kind soul will be sitting there, but that doesn’t matter. This is just coffee. Just my normal caffeine fix.
I open the door and enter the kitchen. The room goes quiet and I stand there feeling self-conscious. “Good morning,” I mumble and make my way to the coffee pot.
“Well, good morning, Carter.” Lolly gives me a knowing smile. “I’m surprised to see you up so early.”
“You were the one to invite me over for coffee, I didn’t want to be rude.” I pour a cup and take a seat at the round table between Lolly and Natalia. She’s in her scrubs and her dark, thick hair is piled in a bun on top of her head. “Good morning,” I mumble to her before I take a sip of coffee.
“Good morning.” She mimics me and takes a sip from her cup as well. “I still need to thank you for helping me get moved in. How about I cook supper for both of you? I’m off work tomorrow.”
Lolly makes a noise in her throat when I don’t respond. “That would be nice,” I fumble out. “You don’t have to, but I won’t turn down a meal.”
“Since I didn’t do anything, you don’t have to trouble yourself. Just cook enough for the two of you.”
“Nonsense, Lolly. You let me stay here.”
“You helped around the house too. Don’t act like you didn’t. You earned your keep. You two have a nice meal together.”
N
either Natalia nor I seem to know how to respond to Lolly. She’s clearly trying to make this sound like a date. Does Natalia consider this a date? I don’t. Maybe I should make that clear? But for whatever reason, I don’t speak up. Instead, I stand up and take my cup to the sink.
“I forgot about something I need to do before work.”
Lolly hurries and asks, “What time tomorrow, Natalia?”
“Would five work?”
Lolly smiles brightly at me, once again, waiting for me to respond. She makes that weird noise again with her throat, so I clear my own and force out, “Five is fine.”
I hurry out the door and across the yard as the reality of what just happened sets in. It’s been two years since I’ve had dinner with a woman other than Lolly. My breathing becomes erratic. Instead of going into the house, I take off in a hard jog. I run and run until my mind is numb, and I can only focus on the soreness of my body.
This is a mistake.
A huge mistake.
Natalia
After my shift at the hospital, I run by the store to grab a few ingredients. I hurry home and get out of my scrubs. I throw on a simple, casual dress and begin prepping the meal. I’m a little nervous to eat alone with Carter. Estoy tostá, I’m crazy, though. I mean, we’ve seen each other naked multiple times. He’s obviously not interested in anything more between us, and neither am I. I’m absolutely not in any way, under any circumstance, one-hundred percent a hard no way interested in Carter Collins. This is two neighbors getting together for dinner, as a favor to the other one for all they’ve done. And that’s it.
My phone rings as I’m chopping a green bell pepper. I put it on speaker and go back to dicing. “Hello?”
“Natalia,” Seth says. “I haven’t heard from you in a few days. I was a little worried I might have blown my shot.”
Seth had asked me to go out for dinner to celebrate closing the deal on the rental. Then he offered to help me move in. We haven’t really spoken much since, and it’s not because I don’t like him. Life gets busy.
“No. I’ve been busy.”
“Ouch. That sounds a lot like blowing me off. I sold you on the house, and now I need to sell you on me, huh?”
“I’m interested.” I lift my cutting board and dump the chopped bell peppers into a bowl. I grab an onion and start the same process.
“What are you doing tonight?”
“Tonight? I’m cooking.”
“And she cooks. Be still my heart. Mind if I join you, I can bring a bottle of wine?”
I pause. What do I say? Something about him coming feels wrong. It’s not like this is a date with Collins, I just told myself it wasn’t. I may have told myself, but I’m still not even convinced. Seth sighs through the phone and says, “You’re eating with someone else?”
“Yes. No. I was just cooking for Lolly and Collins.” Even though Lolly isn’t coming. Why is this suddenly feeling complicated and I’m lying?
“So, it’s not a date?”
“It’s not a date. But it is a dinner for us all to share to thank them for being so nice to me.”
“If there’s room for one more, I can bring the wine to thank them as well?”
He’s being pushy, and immediately I feel my defenses going up. This is the kind of thing Randy would do. But maybe my past experience with Randy is making me judge too quickly. “Sure, be here a little after five.”
“I get off work at five, but I will be there as soon as I can.”
“Great!”
“Thank you, see you tonight.”
I end the call and try to focus on dicing vegetables. I slam the knife down and bow my head. Why is this bothering me? I don’t even know Carter, we don’t have any kind of a relationship. Yet here I am blowing off what might be a really nice attractive man and feeling guilty for including him to a dinner at my house that I’m cooking. This is ridiculous. I’m ridiculous. I’m being absolutely ridiculous right now. Why do I keep thinking the word ridiculous? Besides, I was originally nervous about eating alone with him…now we won’t be alone. We’re all eating as friends and that’s that. I’m not in a relationship with anyone, and this is a simple dinner among friends.
I turn my music up and continue preparing tonight’s dinner. As I’m giving the concert of a lifetime, I spin around as I grab the bowl of salsa criolla to place on the table. That’s when I see a figure standing in the doorway.
Before I realize that it’s Carter, I scream and my arms jerk up, sending the salsa flying everywhere. “¡Carájo, me da un ataque al corazón!” I take a moment to catch my breath as salsa drips down my hair.
“Whoa! Hey, you okay?”
“You about gave me a heart attack,” I gasp.
“I knocked, but I guess you couldn’t hear me over the singing…or attempt at singing. I’m not really sure what that was.”
I grab a towel and wipe the salsa from my face. “No, I didn’t hear you.”
“The door was unlocked. Then, after I came in here, well, I couldn’t interrupt.” He laughs as I give him the stink eye.
“I’m going to go clean up real quick. Make yourself at home.”
Carter laughs harder as I leave the room. Despite being covered in and wasting perfectly good salsa, it was nice to hear him genuinely laugh—not a chuckle, but a full belly laugh. I go to the bathroom and quickly wash off as much as I can with a soapy cloth. Then I pull my hair up in a messy bun. After I change into a clean dress, I hurry back to the kitchen to find Seth there. Carter’s jaw is tense, but other than that he appears fine.
Seth walks over and hugs me. As he takes me in his arms, he whispers, “He told me Lolly wasn’t coming. Good thing I came, huh?” I’m not so sure.
I give him a short smile, but don’t respond with anything else. I don’t really know how I feel. There are moments where I think Carter might be opening up to me, and I don’t know exactly what that means. I just know I love it when he does, but I don’t want to get my hopes up. And do I even want a relationship with him? Do I even want one with Seth? I’m not sure where I stand after my last relationship. I still need time to adjust to my new life.
“Let’s sit,” I say, easing out of his embrace.
I find the salsa has been cleaned up from the floor and chairs. As I place the pastelón in the center of the table, I whisper a thank you to Carter.
Seth is watching us closely. He clears his throat, “This smells delicious. What is it?”
“Pastelón. It’s like lasagna.”
“I’m sure it’ll taste as good as it smells.”
“It’s my grandmother’s recipe. What can I get you to drink?” I look at Carter and smile, “I have whiskey.”
Carter gives me a small smile, while Seth practically chokes, “Whiskey?”
“I have wine, too.”
He grimaces. “Water is fine. Maybe later I’ll have a glass of wine.”
Carter’s lip curls a little but then he says, “Whiskey on the rocks, please.”
The rest of the meal goes about the same. Seth looks uncomfortable. Carter’s jaw ticks and I’m concerned he’s going to crack a tooth. And I’m sitting there awkwardly trying to fill the silence. When we finally finish eating, Carter doesn’t stay for dessert. He politely excuses himself and leaves. Seth sits there for a moment and then says, “Can I be honest?”
“Of course.”
“I like you. A lot. But if this goes somewhere, which I hope it does, I wouldn’t be okay with him coming over here.”
Every hair on my body stands at attention and red flags are waving maniacally. “He’s a friend.”
“You’d be okay with women having dinner and drinks with me?”
I lick my lips and try to choose my words carefully. “If I’m with you, then I’m hoping that means I can trust you.”
“What if I trust you, but not him?”
I take my glass of wine, and before I take a drink, I say, “Good thing it’s not a problem you have now, isn’t it?”
Seth�
��s eyes turn hard. “I guess this relationship isn’t going anywhere, then?”
I raise my chin and stare him straight in the eyes. “I think it’s for the best.”
“Thank you for a lovely meal.”
Seth stands up and sees himself out the same way Carter did. I decide I need a glass of whiskey on the rocks.
The next day I walk across the street to Lolly’s for our morning coffee. When I walk in the kitchen, Carter is already there. They’re both standing close together, and Lolly has a large brown envelope in her hand.
“Macy dropped these off. She was in a hurry, but said they’re photographs for you.”
My heart plummets. Before I can get the words out, Lolly is opening the envelope. Carter takes a sip of his coffee but then spews it back in his cup as Lolly pulls out the photographs.
“Is that my firegear?” he asks.
“Lolly! Why are you opening mail that’s for me?” I try to rush across the room to snatch the photos from her, but I end up tripping over my own feet and going splat on the floor. Carter rushes over and helps me up. There’s definite heat in his eyes, and his skin against mine sends electric tingles all through my body.
Lolly whistles. “She didn’t say they were photos of you. Just for you. I was curious.” She continues looking at each photo. “Oh, I remember when mine were that perky.”
“Lolly! Please stop looking at my photos.”
“I’m a meddling old woman, remember? I can’t help it. I’m just so curious to see what the next one will be.”
Carter walks over and takes the photos from her. Poor man tries his hardest not to look down at the photo that’s staring back at him, but I catch the quick glance he takes. “You know,” he whispers to me, “considering that you’re in my gear without permission, it would only seem fair that I get to sneak a peak of how the photos turned out.”
“But life’s not fair, is it?”
A shadow casts over his face, and his eyes are void of all humor. I immediately regret my words. I was only joking, but if anyone would know about life not being fair, it’s Carter Collins. There was a flicker of light inside of him, but I’ve effectively snuffed it out with my poor choice of words.