by Codi Gary
He climbed into his car with a laugh.
Screw that. If he met the right girl, it wouldn’t matter who his best friend was.
Except if things were really platonic, then why did I nearly round third base wrestling with her the other day?
It was the question that had been plaguing him for days. Sure, he’d gotten a boner before, but never like that. He’d almost slid his hands from around Kelly’s waist and gripped her hips, pulling her body harder against him. Placed kisses along the soft skin of her throat and whispered dirty things in her ear. The whole fantasy had lasted only a moment, but it had lingered. He could still remember the sweet scent of her lotion; he knew it was lotion because Kelly didn’t wear perfume. The hitch in her breath…
He’d pulled away, afraid she’d freak if she knew what he’d been thinking. He’d gotten the hell out of there and now, he had no idea how to pretend he hadn’t thought about taking things to the next level with her.
Just like after that New Year’s Eve party in high school.
He’d played it off like he hadn’t meant what he’d said about kissing her, but he had. He’d wanted to kiss Kelly so bad it had hurt. He’d avoided her and Ray for weeks after, trying to push down the disappointment and frustration and eventually, it had worked and they’d gone back to being friends.
Now here he was, screwing everything up again.
Maybe taking a step back from Kelly was the best thing he could do right now. And in a week, he’d call Rachel and ask her on a date.
The drive back to Sweetheart was a two-lane curvy road, with tall pines on either side that would open briefly to grassy hills. The sun was still setting, and turned the sky the color of a ripe peach. He did love the area, and preferred the simple sounds of crickets and wildlife to the horn honking bustle of the city.
Chris turned down his driveway twenty-five minutes later, and tore down the gravel road. Once he parked inside his garage, he climbed out of his truck and went inside.
He passed through the small, simple kitchen and breakfast nook without bothering to flip on the light. Chris was pretty clean and organized, so he didn’t worry about stepping on anything on the floor he might have forgotten about. The living room was barely a blip on his consciousness as he headed down the hallway to his bedroom.
Normally, he’d stay up and watch something on TV until he fell asleep, but he just wanted to go to bed. To clear his mind and not dwell on women or Kelly or why in the hell he was single.
Before he got ready for bed, he shot off a text to Kelly.
Hey, sorry, wasn’t ignoring you. Just had a rough day. Not up for talking. Off to bed. Will text tomorrow. Night.
Chris put his phone on vibrate and stripped down to nothing. He downed some ZZZQuil to aid the sleeping process. Then, he crawled under the covers and took a deep breath, trying not to think of anything heavy. His brain grew fuzzy and before long, he was drifting off to sleep.
Chris found himself in the middle of a crowded dance floor, surrounded by couples swaying to a slow country song. All of it was eerily familiar and he realized as he pushed through the wall of bodies that he was at his senior prom in the Sacramento Hilton Ballroom. Streamers, twinkling lights, and giant silver stars decorated the dark ceiling. It was supposed to create the illusion of a “Starry Night,” which was the theme they’d voted on three months earlier.
He looked for his date, Zoe, but she was too busy making out with her ex-boyfriend in the corner.
Fan-freaking-tastic.
Even in his dreams, he still didn’t get the girl.
Chris headed over to the separate room with linen-covered tables to sit. When he walked through the archway, he realized the room was now completely empty except for Ray. Even the cheesy love song had evaporated, leaving an almost chilly silence.
Ray sat facing him on the other side of a white table covered in half-eaten chicken and steak dinners and a beautiful flower centerpiece with silver stars poking up between the white roses. Ray looked just as he had that night. He’d had his mom braid his afro, creating clean even rows on his scalp. He was decked out in a white tux, his top hat sitting on the chair next to him. It was funny that before high school, Ray had been the shy one, and Chris the extrovert. Not anymore.
Ray nodded at him. “Hey, man, where’s your date?”
Chris sat down next to the hat chair and sighed, forgetting for a minute this had all happened before. “Getting back together with her ex, apparently.”
“That sucks. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. I knew that they had just broken up and I was an idiot to ask her.” He looked around, noticing several men in the corner breathing fire. Another was doing back hand springs from table to table, drawing nearer and nearer.
Chris frowned when a couple of clowns raced by on mini bikes. “Where’s Kelly? And I thought our theme was Starry Night? Why are those guys tossing torches at each other?”
Ray ignored his question about the performers and lifted a water glass in his hand. “Kelly is most likely at home. Probably sleeping.”
Chris was surprised by how casual Ray was about it. “What? Kelly wouldn’t ditch you.”
Ray shook his head. “I ditched her, remember?”
Chris frowned. Ray had never deserted Kelly on a date. Besides his one crisis of adolescence their sophomore year, Ray had been the perfect boyfriend. At least, according to Kelly.
With a wry smile, Ray opened his white jacket and four red circles formed on the white dress shirt beneath. Blood ran down from the holes, turning his suit crimson.
“Are you up to speed now?” Ray asked.
Chris stared at him, horror flashing through his body as rationality broke through fantasy. “You’re dead.”
“That I am.” Ray pulled his jacket closed, then brought the water glass he’d been holding to his lips. “But forget about my problems. Your love life sucks, right? How can I help fix it?”
Chris wasn’t about to tell his dead best friend that all his relationships seemed to fail because of his friendship with Ray’s former fiancée.
Or that he’d recently been fantasizing about her naked.
Ray set his glass down and waved his hand casually. “If you’re worried I’m going to get mad about you using Kelly to chase girls off, don’t be. If you two want to live in a lonely little bubble for the rest of your lives, more power to you. I just think you aren’t being fair to each other.”
“What do you mean?”
Ray sat back in his chair, pushing the front legs off the ground. “I mean that neither one of you are moving on with your lives. You have your careers and each other, but where is the love? The happiness? What else do you have?”
Ray’s observations hit too close to the points Trevor and Maria had been trying to make.
“I had a girlfriend.”
His friend scoffed. “Who dumped you. I knew that was going to happen, but not you. You actually thought she was going to share her dessert with you?” Ray laughed uproariously before ending his mirth with a sigh of, “Dumbass.”
Chris’s hackles rose in defense. “So, I missed the signs. It happens.”
“Not if you’re actually taking an interest in another person, but let’s move on.”
“No, wait, did you just call me selfish?” Chris asked.
“Oblivious, actually, but let’s forget that for a moment. Anything else you want to share? Something that’s got you down?”
He hesitated, but figured if Ray already knew that Chris was failing as a boyfriend, he probably had caught the rest of their little dramas.
“Kelly said she’s going to start dating.”
Ray nodded. “I know. I’ve been waiting for her to move on for years.”
“Does it hurt?”
He seemed confused. “I don’t really feel pain here. I mean, consciously, I know that
means she’s going to fall in love again, but all I feel is…content. What about you? You can’t rely on Kelly to be your stand-in any longer.”
“She’s not my stand-in! We’re just friends and sometimes, I prefer her company to anyone else’s.”
“You ever thought about the deeper reason why that is?”
A clown stood alongside them, blowing up long, sausage-style balloons and tying them together. Chris shrank away. If this was a dream that included clowns, he waited for it to turn into a nightmare. For the white-faced creature to attack him.
The high-pitched shriek of the latex rubbing against each other was like nails on a chalkboard. The clown handed Chris a colorful array in the shape of a heart and blew a kiss before skipping off.
Chris showed the heart to Ray, who held up his hands. “I don’t know what the hell it means. We’re in your brain, not mine. Now, how about you stop avoiding my question and give me a straight answer?”
“A deeper reason for why I prefer Kelly’s company? Because I am comfortable with her?” Ray rolled his eyes and Chris stiffened. “Look, I’ve already decided to give Kelly some distance and I’m going to ask someone out. I’ve got it handled and you don’t have to worry about us.”
Ray frowned. “I’ll always worry about you guys. You’re my people. I just want you to know that I’m watching, and you need to figure out what you want before it’s too late. Remember, tomorrow isn’t promised.” Ray stood up with the lapels of his jacket clutched in his hands, showing off the bullet wounds as he spun around with flourish. “I’m proof of that.”
Chris woke up with a start, staring up at his white ceiling as his chest heaved.
What in the hell was that? He’d had dreams of Ray before, but never like that. It was vivid and weird.
Remember, tomorrow isn’t promised.
Chris covered his eyes with his arm, trying to calm his racing heart.
There was no way he was getting back to sleep now.
Chapter 9
It was Friday night and Kelly sat next to Hank at the bar in Bow Ties Italian Restaurant. She’d suggested the dim, calm atmosphere rather than the bustle of Shotguns. The area had several booths lined up against the walls of the restaurant, with a few round tables in the middle. In another dining area closest to the kitchen, rectangle tables and booths filled the well-lit area designated for families. In the dark barroom, couples sat on the same side of the table, snuggled up and gazing at each other over wine and garlic bread.
Kelly had opted to sit at the bar because Hank was less likely to try to get cozy on the uncomfortable bar stools.
Another reason she’d chosen Bow Ties was because she was less likely to bump into Chris here, a plus since she was so agitated with him. The bar area was thinning out now that it was getting closer to nine o’clock, as people headed to more lively activities.
Kelly glanced at her phone again, but there was still no answer from Chris. Besides a few “Sorry, just really busy” texts, it had been radio silence. He always had his phone on him, so he had to be avoiding her. The bastard. She was going to kick his ass until he told her what the hell his problem was.
Maybe he sensed my lustful thoughts and is scared I’ll jump him.
Which was ridiculous. She wouldn’t jump Chris and ruin what they had. She had self-control. She was a freaking adult, unlike some people!
“Everything all right?” Hank asked.
Kelly set her phone on the bar face down and smiled, pushing away her turbulent thoughts.
“Yeah, just making sure there are no crises I’m missing.”
Hank leaned an elbow on the counter, his gray eyes luminous in the low lights. “Ah, for a minute there, I thought you might be waiting for a rescue.”
“Come again?” she asked.
He flashed a grin at her. Tonight, he was wearing a blue button-down and jeans, looking relaxed and stylish all at once. “You know. Women have their girlfriend call and say there’s an emergency, so they can escape a horrible date.”
Kelly picked up her glass of Merlot and took a sip. “I have no reason to do that.”
“Because you’re enjoying my company so much?”
“No, because this isn’t a date,” she countered.
Hank chuckled. “A few more nights out with me, and I’ll change your mind.”
“You’re bordering on cocky, sir.” Kelly crossed her legs as she sat on the barstool, noticing the way Hank’s gaze drifted down to admire her limbs. She’d broken out her black dress with the loose skirt. She loved the way it swished around her legs when she walked, and the simple spaghetti straps showed off her neck and shoulders.
Not because she was trying to entice Hank. She just wanted to feel pretty. To enjoy the attentions of a handsome man.
There was nothing wrong with that.
Except her hand itched to check her phone again.
I need to stop thinking about Chris. If he wants to be a dumbass over a little body malfunction, that’s on him.
“I prefer the term charming to cocky,” Hank said,
Concentrating on the dimple in his cheek, she smirked. “I’m sure you do.”
“I like that you’re quick witted.”
“As opposed to just laughing at everything you say?” she asked.
“Actually, yes. I don’t get very many women who tell me no.”
“Shocker.”
“I didn’t mean that I’m a man whore.”
Kelly laughed. “This conversation is swiftly going south.”
He took her hand in both of his, startling her as he met her gaze eagerly. “Then tell me more about you, Kelly.”
His hands were warm and soft around hers, but besides feeling a little nervous, his touch didn’t make her heart race. “Um, not much to tell. I’m always working. Something Borrowed is my life.”
“Ever been married?” he asked.
“No. I was engaged once.” Damn, why did I open that can of worms?
“What happened?”
Kelly swallowed hard. “He died.”
He sat back, his eyebrows nearly touching his hairline over his wide eyes. “Bloody hell, I’m sorry.”
That was everyone’s response. They were sorry for her loss, sorry for her pain. What else could they say?
Still, she found it annoying, because it made her think about the past. About what could have been, and it still hurt. She wanted to be over it and never feel that sharp twinge in her chest again, but although it had faded, it still existed.
“It wasn’t your fault. It happened eleven years ago.”
“And you haven’t been serious about anyone since?”
“No.”
An awkward silence stretched between them. He probably thought she was some weird, obsessed woman forever pining for her lost love.
Rather than try to explain or assure him, she decided it was safer to change the subject. Kelly took a sip of wine before asking, “What about you? The tabloids said you were married once. What happened?”
“You’ve read enough Hollywood love stories in the tabloids. It’s the same as the rest… We got together when we were first starting out in the business. My career took off and hers didn’t. It put a strain on our marriage. Didn’t make it past five years before she took me for half. Thank God we never had kids.”
Hank spoke of it so matter of fact, but Kelly could tell the memory still stung by the tightening at the corners of his stormy gray eyes. “That really sucks.”
He shrugged. “It’s life. Sometimes you get lucky and other times, you come out with nothing.”
She pulled her hand away from his and took another drink of her wine. Even though she’d lost Ray, she didn’t feel as though she had nothing in her life. “I’ve been lucky in other aspects, if not in love. I’ve got a great business. Good friends. Chris.”
“Chris, your lawyer?” he asked.
“Yeah, and best friend. We’ve known each other since we were thirteen.”
He quirked one eyebrow. “Never dated?”
“Not once. It’s always been platonic.” At least, it used to be.
“No such thing.”
Her eyes narrowed in irritation. “Excuse me?”
“I’m just saying that men and women cannot be friends. Eventually, someone is going to confess their feelings and when the other person rejects them, it will ruin the illusion of friendship forever.”
“The illusion of…good God, you’re a pessimist.”
Hank clucked his tongue, his expression scolding. “I’m a realist. Either you are holding a candle for him or he’s got a big old shine for you. Either way, you’re fooked.”
She bit her lip to keep from laughing at the way he said fucked. It almost completely dissolved her annoyance with him, it was that cute.
Of course, almost didn’t count. Especially when she was already sensitive where Chris was concerned. “We aren’t. Chris was best friends with my fiancée, Ray. Believe me, he feels nothing more than brotherly toward me.”
Hank leaned forward, bringing his face closer to hers. “It’s you then, is it? You got a thing for your fancy lawyer friend?”
She moved a little closer, teasing him. “Nope.”
Hank cocked his head to the side and scoffed. “I don’t believe it, but there’s one true test to be sure.”
“And what’s that?”
“Get naked in front of each other.”
Kelly nearly blew wine out of her nose. “What?”
“Ye heard me. Parade around him in nothing but your birthday suit. If he doesn’t jump your bones he’s either not interested or gay. Same goes for you.”
Kelly coughed, trying to disguise her laughter. “You’re a terrible man.”
“Not what you’d be saying if you stripped for me, love.”
Kelly’s cheeks flushed with embarrassment and she finished the rest of her wine with an unladylike gulp. She set her glass on the bar with a clink and stood. “I should probably get home.”