by Nichols, TJ
In the middle of the yard, he rolled up a ball, as though all he wanted in the world was a snowman. The snow wasn’t thick enough, and it would be a pathetic snowman, but he didn’t care. The man followed them outside but remained on the porch, still on his phone.
“Stay close,” Angus murmured. Then he brought up a circle that wouldn’t stop a fly from crossing, but it would contain sound. He hoped he’d done it right. It had the right feel, and it was the right color in his mind. “Smile like I’m amazing or something.”
“You’re amazing and… what happened to your eyes?”
Angus studied the snow as heat colored his cheeks. “Demonside started draining me.” One good sleep hadn’t been enough to return the color.
“Shit.”
“Yeah. I’m fine.” He reached out a damp glove to touch Terrance on the shoulder. “And you?”
“I’m training with a team. Aside from the dampener, it’s all good.” But he didn’t sound entirely sure that everything was good, and he glanced back at the house with worry in his eyes.
“No one can hear you. The house is full of dampeners and surveillance. I can only do stuff out here.”
Terrance was quiet for a moment. “I want to play, or I thought I did, but it seems so stupid now. I know how bad things are. I’ve seen what’s happening in other countries. I can help the underground, but they won’t let me. My only value is to keep you in line.” He glanced at Angus. “Not that they’ve said that. The underground has changed from when I first joined. Maybe I didn’t want to see it.” He patted the ball he’d been making, and it fell apart.
Angus put his hand over Terrance’s. The guard was still watching them, so they had to act as though they were just rekindling. That would actually be nice, but he didn’t want to do that under the watchful gaze of a man who hated him. “Too many warlocks?”
“We’re both warlocks.” Terrance smiled the way he remembered from when they first got together in a heady rush of lust. For a moment Angus was weightless. Terrance had the power to make him feel as though he were the sun and bursting with life. He was dazzled and willing to slip into the fantasy that someone could like him for being who he was and nothing more. Then the smile dimmed. “But yeah, too many senior warlocks. The guy in charge goes by the name Risely. I doubt it’s his real name.” He sighed. “It gets worse. While you were gone, new security measures were put in place. No one can see external news.”
“What?” He hadn’t heard that, but he hadn’t tried to access it either.
Terrance held his hand. “Don’t try. There have been some arrests. I don’t want to believe it, but I think someone in the underground reported it to the college.”
“They couldn’t bring the underground down, so they corrupt it from the inside.” It was bitter news to hear his suspicions confirmed. “Others must feel the same? What about other wizards?”
“He’s looking at us. I’m going to kiss you. Maybe that’s what he’s waiting for.”
“Is it what you’re waiting for?” It was what Angus wanted but had been too scared to take.
Terrance didn’t reply. His lips brushed Angus’s as though he’d planned only a gentle kiss, but something changed the moment their lips connected. A hunger that was clean of magic and filled only with need broke free. Angus gripped the collar of Terrance’s coat and drew him closer. He overbalanced, and they fell back into the snow. Terrance came with him, and his body pinned Angus to the ground, his lips still there, still offering that taste of perfection.
“This new arrangement is going to make it really hard to see you.”
Maybe that was the point. “Your life would be safer, better, without me.”
“Nah. I don’t believe that. I was already walking into trouble before you crossed my path.”
The cold seeped into Angus’s pants. The backs of his legs were wet, but he didn’t want to throw Terrance off. He liked the way he felt, heavier and more solid than Saka, though the demon was far stronger. He also liked the way Terrance stared down at him as though he wanted so much more.
He toyed with a strand of Angus’s hair, and his lips parted as though he were going to speak, but instead Terrance took another kiss. “We’ll find a way. I’ll make sure of it.”
“I want that.” Angus wanted many things, but most of them were out of reach. He wanted to ask why Terrance would still be interested in him after everything that had happened. But the words wouldn’t form. For once he didn’t want to understand. He just wanted to feel. “So what now?”
Terrance nuzzled into Angus’s neck as his hips pressed closer. His body demonstrated how much he wanted Angus. “Now I get to wish that we weren’t wearing all these clothes.”
“It’s a bit cold to strip.” And there was the audience.
“Next time, we’ll get to be alone.”
“Yeah.” Alone, but not free.
The smile left Terrance’s face. “For the moment we just stay alive. The underground has been attacking the college. Several wizards have died. They haven’t asked me to go on any runs yet. I doubt they will, but they might get your group to go.”
“In the hope we die?”
Terrance inclined his head. “Why did the demons attack?”
“I don’t know. But Guda and Ellis are dead.” He’d have to ask Saka about the demon attack. “How do you know about the attack?”
“Because they came to the place I was staying. I thought… I hoped that they were going to free me and take me with them. But I wasn’t sure. They killed two of the guards before they were stopped.”
The cold wasn’t just on his skin. It was in his bones and in his blood. It wasn’t an attack. It was a failed rescue. He’d told Saka about Terrance being held captive, and the mages had taken action—action that had resulted in Guda’s death. Why had Saka not told him?
“Would you have gone with them? Do you want to be rescued? If you leave, then you’ll be a rogue. A criminal.” And everything Terrance wanted would be gone. He’d never get to play rugby. At the moment he could still reclaim the life he’d wanted before he went to Warlock College and before he tangled with the underground. Angus understood why the underground was being nice to Terrance. They wanted him to have a good life so he wouldn’t muck it up, so he’d have something to lose if Angus fucked up.
So Angus would know he was ruining lives.
Terrance pressed his lips together. Grim and ready to fight. “If I refuse to do anything they want, that’s the stick they threaten me with. They won’t be content to threaten me forever, Angus.”
Chapter Seventeen
Saka walked around the blue pool in ever widening circles as he looked for suitable stones. Angus had three in his bag already. He tended to go for the pretty ones, but they didn’t always make the most functional telestones. He needed to know if Angus could make and use a telestone. As far as he knew, no human had even been taught. Maybe it wasn’t possible. Their minds, or magic, might not be up to the task.
They were on the farthest edge from the camp. The bells around Angus’s ankle chimed with every step. Not all demons wore them. But some did as they were meant to ward off riverwyrms. They were among the gifts Angus had been given to tempt his soul into staying. Saka’s tent had been too quiet when Angus was across the void, though he’d returned with bright blue eyes which lifted Saka’s heart.
“May I ask what Miniti wanted to know?” Saka had taken Angus to see her as soon as he arrived, so she could see that he wasn’t interfering with her orders.
He’d already contacted a few trusted mage friends to see if they knew about other demons. So far the news was not encouraging, but they agreed to set up a network of telestones in the hope of contacting demons elsewhere in Demonside. Another demon had made the suggestion, and that had saved Saka from breaking Miniti’s edict.
“She wanted an update on the college and the underground.” Angus lifted his gaze from the sand and the tough, flowering grasses that grew around the crystalline pool. “I didn
’t mention that I no longer trust the underground.”
Saka nodded. “That was wise. I do not want the leaders to revoke the agreement that I fought for. War will not help us.”
“Agreed. But in my world, it is coming. Vinland is preparing. Sanctions are already hitting food supplies. It’s not looking good.” He pressed his lips together and shook his head. “I don’t understand why.”
“Some people love power at any cost. It eats at them that other people might also enjoy the benefits. Will they use their magic as a weapon?”
Angus shrugged. “I don’t know if there is a weapon or if they’re just hoarding magic.” He took his hat off and pushed his hair back. The red strands were dark with sweat. Saka knew the salty taste of Angus’s skin too well. “You were there,” Angus continued. “What did you wring out from my father’s blood?”
There was only the slightest hint of bitterness. Given that Angus’s father had tried to kill Angus, Saka expected more anger or rage, but Angus had returned from Humanside with his eyes blue and his heart shut up tight. He had only been back for a day, so Saka hadn’t pressed. He let Angus think on it, alone and untouched on his side of the bed.
Saka was wary of rebalancing or even having sex for fun. He’d forgotten what that was like, but maybe it should stay forgotten. Then Demonside wouldn’t take another part of Angus.
But he wanted Angus, and Angus needed to learn how to hold on to what he had and refuse to rebalance. Saka craved Angus’s embrace and hungered for his kiss, but he hated that need. He couldn’t indulge it until Angus knew how to separate himself from the magic of Demonside.
“I wasn’t there. I was with you. But I was told your father was not forthcoming with his answers.” Angus’s father had screamed at the demons before finally begging for his life.
“He couldn’t even do the right thing when on the end of a blade and at the end of his life.” Angus put his bag down and used his shirt to wipe his face. His belly was pale, and the scar was no longer an angry red, but a soft pink. When he lowered his shirt, his face was set.
Saka put his bag down. They probably had enough stones to sort through. Some would be useless, but some would resonate with magic. He planned to teach all the trainees how to transform them. He needed to disguise his actions as lessons to avoid displeasing Miniti. The prickle of the deception clawed beneath his skin, even though he knew he was doing the right thing by seeking out other demons.
“Why didn’t you tell me you tried to rescue Terrance?” Angus rubbed at his forearm as though to relieve a tired muscle.
Saka didn’t expect the question and didn’t know how to answer. He hadn’t tried to rescue Terrance. That was why he’d said nothing about it. Not helping was a stain that would mark his conscience for as long he lived.
“I told the mages what had happened to Terrance and the effect on you. Some wanted to spill warlock blood. They wanted to strike against the humans.” He swallowed. “I didn’t agree. The plan was rash and rushed because it was our last night as a whole.”
Angus didn’t say anything, but he watched Saka as though he were searching for a lie in his words.
Saka forced himself to hold Angus’s gaze. “I voted against the plan. I didn’t go with them to find Terrance. I should’ve. Then maybe Guda would be alive.”
Angus stood frozen, and Saka fully expected him to turn and walk back to the camp. But Angus only nodded.
Finally he spoke. “It was rash. They should’ve waited until there was more information about where Terrance was being held. But I appreciate the effort.” Saka couldn’t discern the look in his eyes. Then a smile turned the corner of Angus’s lips. “That wasn’t the reason you voted against, though. You wouldn’t be jealous at all? You being a mage who’s told me often enough that mages shouldn’t have commitments or affections for others, lest it be a distraction from their duty to the greater tribe.”
Saka stepped back. He could deny, but lying always came back and caused greater injury. Sometimes it was worth that risk, but this was not one of those times. “You are correct.”
How petty he was. He was trying to teach when he couldn’t control his own feelings, couldn’t put them aside to best serve the tribe. Maybe Miniti was right, and he should focus on his little area of Demonside, not the whole world. But if Angus’s world was affected, then Demonside would be as well. His responsibility was to the greater tribe. Not just his little corner of the desert.
Angus’s smile became a grin. Then he nodded and picked up his bag. “You could’ve told me all that before.” He stopped and toed at a rock in front of him. It was darker than the blue-tinged rocks around them and glittered in the sun even before Angus dusted it off with his shirt. “This is the one I want.”
Saka sighed. Humans and their attraction to shiny things. “Bring the others anyway. That one may not work.”
“You just want me to lug rocks around the desert.” But he slung the bag over his shoulder and added his new rock to it.
“There is always a reason I make you do things. You are better at choosing rocks for the trainees than I am, because you are human.”
“And the reason you’re jealous?”
“Was jealous.” He wasn’t anymore. Angus would be forever his in a way that Angus would never be Terrance’s. It was better that Angus had someone back home. He would never truly be a demon mage, but he could be a strong ally and a voice for Demonside. “I like you.”
Angus gave him a sideways glance. “It’s not that hard to say ‘I love you.’”
But Saka had never said those words to anyone. Angus was the first person he’d ever loved.
The mages and their trainees made themselves comfortable in Saka’s tent, and it went from spacious to cramped. Until Angus, he had all the space to himself. Now it was too big when he was on his own. He risked a glance at Angus, who finally knew how Saka felt about him. How was Saka supposed to teach impartially when he wanted to protect Angus from error? Sometimes the best way to learn was to fail and try again.
“Do you think it’s wise to teach them how to make telestones? They may not even be able to use them.” Usi’s voice was low enough to be private but loud enough that everyone could hear if they were paying attention—which they were.
He shouldn’t have to defend himself to her. He was head mage. How he taught was up to him. Neither of the other mages had been bold enough to raise any concerns. Did they secretly agree with Usi that he was going too far? They’d all been happy enough to accept his offer to teach.
“True. They may not be able to use telestones at all. They may not be able to use the ones that we have made, as our minds are different. Magic is of our world, not theirs. So why not start at the beginning and see if they can even make one?” Saka spoke at the same controlled volume as she had.
While many mages taught use before creation, he’d been taught the other way around, and that was how he taught. It also made more sense for humans. If they couldn’t make it, they probably couldn’t use it.
Usi’s eyes narrowed. She didn’t have a response, but she didn’t leave either. Instead she took a seat. How much of what was said and done would she report to Miniti or the other mages who’d voted against teaching humans anything?
For the moment he couldn’t worry about it. There were humans to teach, and they had already picked up and examined the palm-sized rocks that Angus and he had gathered that day.
Communicating via telestone wasn’t complicated magic, but Saka did hold doubts that humans could maintain the focus required. The stone held magic and became attuned to the user. It was the tuning of one’s thoughts that required time and patience to learn. A telestone was a focal point and an amplifier, but concentration had to be precise and unwavering.
Angus hadn’t given up his glittery rock. It was pretty when it was clean—like sunlight on the blue pool. And like any good mage, he handled the tool he intended to use to get a feel for it.
He glanced up and then put the rock in front of hi
m, the way everyone had—even Usi.
Saka brought up a circle and blew out a breath. It would be interesting, if nothing else. He hoped that Angus was able to work without drawing magic from himself. While it might be okay for Angus to do across the void, it could be fatal in Demonside.
It was dark when Saka called the session to a halt. The humans hadn’t managed to turn a rock into a telestone. Angus scratched at his arm, his scowl fixed in place.
Saka put his hand over Angus’s. “Enough for today.”
He’d watched Angus try and fail, without reaching to the magic within him. Angus probably could’ve made the telestone, or at least gotten close if he had, but the cost would have been too high.
Something writhed in Saka’s mind—an image as though from a telestone. His arm itched, and he pulled his hand away, breaking the contact. The image faded.
“What?” Angus’s concentration broke, and he looked up.
“You’re close.” Closer than Saka had thought. He studied Angus’s eyes and looked for a fade, but there was none. But there was something wrong with Angus’s arm.
“Close but unsuccessful.” Usi smiled. “Perhaps humans don’t have the mental capacity.”
Saka flicked her a sharp glare. A mage shouldn’t demean students. Not everyone learned at the same rate or had the same gifts. He’d heard of demons who took days even to learn to use a telestone. But once the skill was gained, it became easier.
Lizzie turned to Usi. “Perhaps it would help if you weren’t heckling in the background. What exactly do you have to lose if we learn?”
The air in the tent stilled.
Usi stood. “I will not be insulted by a trainee of a guest mage.”