by Jody Morse
“I’m not sure if there’s room for both of us,” Declan replied. “I’m a lot taller now than I used to be.”
“Oh. Yeah, I guess you’re right,” Samara said, trying to hide the disappointment in her voice. “Is everything okay?”
Declan shrugged. “I guess. I just feel . . . different.”
“Different how?” Samara asked, raising an eyebrow. It didn’t look like Declan was that unhappy, but there had to be some reason why Seth believed he would hurt himself if they didn’t get there in time.
“You know how everything happens for a reason? I can’t figure out why things have been happening the way they have been lately.” Declan paused, as though he were trying to decide if he should say more. “I don’t know how to explain it, but this isn’t what I envisioned being a werewolf to be like. I never thought things would be weird with my best friend, and I never expected my first Alpha to turn out to be a crazy psycho.”
Samara sighed. “Do you think I expected things to go the way they have so far? The last thing I ever wanted was to destroy the pack that my grandfather was once on, but what choice did I have? Jason had to be taken down. And I hated not being able to speak to Seth or to you, but . . . Declan, you should be happy now.”
Declan glanced over at her. “Why should I be happy?”
“Because now we have the chance to make everything right. We don’t have to be enemies anymore. I know you’ve been having second thoughts about joining the new pack, but honestly, Dec . . . if you don’t do it, we’re going to end up being enemies again. It doesn’t matter what pack you might want to be on next, none of them are going to let you stay friends with me.”
After she said the words,Samara wasn’t sure how she really felt about them. As much as she agreed with everything she’d said, there was still a part of her that felt like her life would somehow be easier and less confusing if Declan decided that he didn’t want to be a part of the new pack. The dynamics of the pack would change, and it was going to be weird to have to refrain from kissing Luke when they were around the pack so that she didn’t upset Declan.
Declan tilted his head back and stared into the darkness of the tunnel. “It’s not that easy, Sam. I want to be friends with you, but joining this pack makes me afraid because . . .” He stopped mid-sentence.
“What are you afraid of?” Samara questioned.
“Nothing . . . Nevermind,” Declan answered, patting his dark hair. He glanced over at Samara, studying her eyes. “Is that what you want . . . for me to join the new pack? Would it make you happy?”
“It would make me happy,” Samara lied. Well, it felt like a lie, at least, since she wasn’t really sure if it was what would make her happy.
Declan stared at her for a long while. Finally, he said, “Then, I’ll do it. I’ll join the pack, since that’s what you want.”
Samara smiled. “I’m glad,” she said, knowing that if she told Declan otherwise—if she told him that she had doubts about him joining—it would crush him because he would feel like he had nowhere else to belong.
Chapter 4
“Okay, so which of the following is an organelle that is involved in energy production of a prokaryotic cell?” Brad Kelly asked from across the table that they were sitting at in the public library on Wednesday afternoon.
Samara tapped her pencil against her notebook and stared at the aisle of books on the other side of them. She wondered if the public library had any of the same books that were written about werewolves, usually by werewolf authors, that the Jackson family had in the library at their old house.
“Samara?” Brad asked impatiently.
“Huh?” She glanced over at him, realizing that she hadn’t even been paying attention to him. It was their first tutoring session since before winter break, and she just couldn’t seem to focus on any of the questions. Actually, now that school was back in progress again, she was finding it difficult to focus on anything related to academics. The only thing she could think about was Declan and what she’d told him.
Had she made the right decision? It’s not like she could go back and tell him that he couldn’t join the new pack. It would make her look heartless. And that was not even to mention that it was a decision that she was going to need to live with forever. What if she told him that it wasn’t okay—that he couldn’t be on the pack—and one day she regretted her decision?
“If you don’t feel like studying right now, we can always schedule a tutoring session at another time,” Brad suggested, obviously sensing that she wasn’t into preparing for her exam. “Unless you don’t want to do another session at all, that is. I’m willing to reimburse you. I know last time you were really reluctant to follow through with this.”
Samara sighed. She felt bad that he thought she didn’t want him to tutor her; even though she had been reluctant to let him tutor her, it had been a combination of her mom forcing her to get a tutor and Samara not wanting Luke to find out that Brad was the one who was tutoring her, since Luke had felt threatened by Brad before. He had seemed to think that Brad had a crush on her.
“It’s not that I don’t want you to tutor me,” Samara said now. “I just have a lot of other stuff on my mind right now.”
Brad hesitated. “Well, in case you’re wondering, I’m not just a great tutor and an award-winning biology student. I’m also a really good listener.”
Samara smiled. “Thanks for the offer, but I’m not sure if you would understand my problems.” She started to pack up her stuff and was about to tell him that she would text him to reschedule, when he stared back at her, willing to take on the challenge.
“Tell me that your problems don’t involve a guy,” Brad pressed.
“Well, they do, but . . . it’s a little more complicated than that.”
Brad shook his head. “No, I doubt it’s that complicated. Love is actually pretty simple when you really think about it. Sometimes, you just need to be an outsider to know the right answers. Come on, just try me. I bet I can help you figure things out.”
Samara hesitated. How much could she really tell Brad without giving everything away? The last thing she needed was someone from the human world to suspect that there was something else going on in her life.
But what if he did have the answers? Samara couldn’t go to Luke with her problems because they involved him. She couldn’t tell Colby, either, because he was Luke’s best friend and there was always a risk that what she said would get back to him. Samara also couldn’t tell Emma, she realized, because Colby might be able to hear her thoughts. And she definitely couldn’t tell Declan what was bothering her because, well, saying the wrong thing would hurt him.
She glanced over at Brad, who was staring at her from behind his questioning hazel eyes. “I’m sort of not sure how to handle a situation involving two guys,” she said quietly, glancing around to make sure no one else was listening.
“Oh, yeah?” Brad looked sort of surprised.
Samara nodded. “One of them is someone who I’ve known forever. He has feelings for me, and I think I may have had feelings for him at one point, too.” As she said the words, she wondered when the feelings she thought she had stopped—or if they stopped at all. Having those thoughts made her feel relieved when she remembered that she had blocked Luke from hearing her thoughts so he didn’t know that she was with Brad. The last thing she needed was for him to hear her thinking about whether or not she might still have any lingering feelings for Declan.
“And what about the second guy?” Brad questioned. It surprised Samara because, at one point, she had been convinced that he’d had feelings for her, too. Now, she wasn’t sure if it was because Brad really did like her, or if it was because Luke had put the idea in her head when he’d gotten so jealous that night at the restaurant.
Either way, whatever feelings Brad had must have been gone now, because he seemed genuinely interested in her situation.
“The second guy—well, you already know who the second guy is. It’s Lu
ke,” Samara blurted, mostly because she didn’t want rumors starting at school that she was involved with someone other than Luke. “I’m in a position right now where I’m going to need to spend a lot of time with both of them at the same time, and—”
“Why?” Brad interrupted her. “Why would you put yourself in a position where you have to be around both of them at the same time?”
“It’s not a choice,” Samara replied, searching her head for a reason.
“Oh, so you mean, you’re in like a sport or club together or something?”
Relieved that Brad gave her an excuse—one that wasn’t too far from the truth—Samara nodded. “Yes, exactly! Something like that. So, we’re going to need to be around each other, and I think it’s going to be weird.”
Brad tapped his finger against his squared chin. “Why don’t you just quit this club you’re in? That way, you wouldn’t need to be around the two of them at the same time.”
Samara laughed. “I wish it were that simple. I can’t quit this . . . club. It’s important for me to stay a member.”
“Oh, so you need it for your college application,” Brad pieced together.
“Yes, exactly.” Samara smiled, relieved that he had thrown another excuse into the palms of her hands again. “So, no matter what, I’ll need to be around both of them at the same time.”
“I guess you’re right. Your situation is complicated.”
Samara laughed. “Thank you, Captain Obvious.”
“I think I have it figured out, though,” Brad said slowly. “If you feel that weird around them when you’re all together at the same time, maybe it’s for a reason. Maybe it’s because neither of them is the right guy for you.”
Samara wanted to laugh at him again, but she knew that she couldn’t without telling him the whole story. There was no way his advice could be accurate when Luke was her chosen mate.
Chapter 5
Luke was waiting for Samara in the car when she left the library. There was snow on the ground from a few days earlier, and it sloshed underneath her shoes as she approached his car.
When Samara climbed into the passenger’s seat, Luke turned to her. “So, is she good?”
Samara blinked. “Is who good?”
“Your tutor,” Luke said, as though the answer should have been obvious. Samara recalled that she had told Luke that her tutor was an old woman who was a retired teacher. It was the first lie that had come to her mind at the time; she didn’t know what to tell him, but she knew that she couldn’t tell him the truth—that her tutor was Brad.
“Oh, she’s fine,” Samara replied. She hoped that he didn’t suspect that she was lying to him.
“So, are we doing our new pack’s initiation tonight?” Luke questioned, changing the subject, as he pulled out of the parking lot.
“Um, I never actually set a time for it. Why, does everyone want to do it tonight?” Samara questioned.
“Well, no one’s actually said anything, but I think they’re all waiting to see what your next move will be,” Luke replied. “The sooner we do it, the better, though, right?”
Samara hesitated. “I guess.”
Luke turned to her, studying her face. “You don’t want to initiate, do you?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“No, but you’re not really into the idea. I can sense it,” Luke said, focusing his attention on the road. “Is it because you’re afraid of what your grandfather would have thought?”
Samara shook her head. “No, I’m fine. I want to initiate. I’m ready to. You’re right. There’s no reason for us to put this off any longer. It’s better to get it done sooner than later. I guess I’ll call a pack meeting.” Opening her thoughts to the entire pack, she said: Let’s all meet at ten o’clock tonight at our usual spot. We’re going to initiate into our new pack. Don’t be late.
“Oh, I have to text my brother. And Declan,” Samara said aloud, realizing that neither of them could hear her thoughts like her original pack members could. She opened a text to send to both of them, letting them know the place where they were meeting and the time. As soon as she hit ‘send’, Samara felt her stomach sink.
Everything was about to change. She just hoped it would be for the best.
*
Samara waited in the woods behind her house for everyone to arrive. Next to her, Luke paced back and forth, anxiously.
“You’re quiet,” Samara commented, realizing that Luke hadn’t said more than two words to her since he had asked about initiation earlier in the car. She wondered what was bothering him.
Luke shrugged. “I guess.”
“Is everything okay?”
Luke turned to look at her and, just as it looked like he was about to say something, Emma skipped over to them. “Hey, guys! We’re here.”
“Hi, everyone,” Kyana said with a smile, reaching to give Samara a hug.
“You’re here!” Samara cried excitedly, surprised to see that Kyana was back in Pennsylvania. She hadn’t heard from Chris at all since he’d left for Alaska using the plane ticket she’d bought him as a Christmas gift. Samara hadn’t been expecting him to return, though; she’d given him permission as Alpha to stay in Alaska if that was what he decided to do and if Orkos agreed to let him become a Koto.
Kyana nodded. “Yeah, we just got back to Pennsylvania. Chris is just swinging by the house and dropping our bags off. He’ll be here soon. He told me to tell you he’s sorry if he’s a little later, but that he will be here in time for initiation.”
Samara nodded. “Okay, that’s fine. I’m a little confused, though. Are you joining the new pack?”
Kyana nodded. “Yes, I’m back here for good this time.”
“What about Orkos?” Samara questioned. The whole reason Kyana had left in the first place was because her father, Orkos, had threatened to disown her if she chose to remain an Ima instead of going back to the Koto pack. Orkos had also refused to let Chris join the Koto; he wanted his daughter to be with someone who came from the same type of world as her—a world where werewolves lived in caves and huts—instead of someone who lived in a modern civilization, like Chris.
“My father changed his mind. He said it was fine for me to come back here, as long as I agreed to spend summer vacations with the Koto. The Koto isn’t going to disown me. They’re still considering me an honorary pack member. Chris, too.” Kyana grinned.
“That’s great! I’m so happy for you!” Samara said, smiling. She wasn’t sure why Orkos had made the whole process of accepting Kyana’s decision to join another pack so drawn out, but she supposed it was probably because he hated the thought of losing his daughter. Orkos had probably realized that he was being unrealistic and that, whether he liked it or not, Kyana was going to choose her mate in the end.
“So, Chris told me we’re forming a new pack. Why are we doing that?” Kyana asked.
“It’s complicated,” Samara started to say, as Steve and Josh approached them. “I’ll explain it to you sometime, but . . . it’s just something that needs to be done.”
“Have we decided on an official pack name yet?” Colby asked.
Samara turned around to look at him, noticing that he was carrying a large trash bag. “No, but I have an idea. I think we’re going to take a vote before we get started.” She motioned to the bag. “What is that stuff?”
“It’s just a bunch of supplies I thought we might need. We do need to decide tonight what our initiation ritual is going to be,” Colby explained.
“Oh, that’s right,” Samara murmured. “I didn’t even think about that.”
“Can we make our initiation ritual cool, at least?” Steve pleaded. “None of this lame blood brothers shit. And no throwing hair into a fire. That’s so pathetic.”
“Which pack had to throw hair into the fire?” Kyana asked with raised eyebrows. Samara noticed that she had her eyebrow ring in again; she’d worn it when they went to the club together in Alaska, but when she’d came to Pennsylvania the fir
st time, she hadn’t worn it. Samara hoped this was a sign that Kyana was back to her old self and that she wouldn’t change her mind and want to go back to the Koto pack.
“I’m probably breaking a ton of werewolf codes of ethics considering there’s still an adult Vyka pack by telling you this,” Colby said hesitantly. “Aw, screw it. The Vyka initiation involved cutting one’s hair and throwing it into the fire.”
“That sounds like a really good initiation ritual,” Emma chimed in. “It totally grossed me out that we had to mix our blood when we initiated. Can we please not have blood as part of our initiation?”
“I agree,” Chris said, as he walked over to them. “The blood thing even grossed me out the first time I had to do it.” He glanced over at Samara and smiled.
Samara smiled back at him before turning to Emma. “There will be no blood, I promise.” She turned to Colby. “What type of supplies did you bring? Do you already have something in mind?”
Colby shook his head. “No, I don’t have any ideas, but I brought a few things that I thought might inspire us.” He reached into the trash bag and pulled the first thing out, holding it up for everyone to see.
“A pair of scissors,” Samara noted.
Colby nodded. “Yeah, I figured I would bring a pair just in case we wanted to go with something similar to the Vyka’s ritual.” He hesitated before adding in a lower voice, “I’ve also heard stories of people in other packs cutting off each other’s hair down there as a part of their ritual. That’s always an idea.”
Emma narrowed her eyes at him. “Ew, Colby! You’re not touching my hair down there, or anyone else’s, so don’t even think about it.”
Chris turned to Steve. “Dude, Colby’s got pubes.”
“We all have hair down there!” Colby insisted, red splotches blooming on his cheeks in embarrassment. “We might be werewolves, but we’re still human. If anything, our hair grows quicker now that we are werewolves.”