[Measure of Devotion 01.0] Measure of Devotion

by Caethes Faron

  “First of all, you’re not a fool. You love freely, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Second of all, it’s not really fair to compare Renee to Eric. Renee was wonderful and easy to like. You couldn’t have known it’d end like this. She never seemed to have a problem with me before.”

  “And what about Eric?” Jason’s voice was muffled against Kale’s chest.

  “Well, Eric wasn’t one of your better moments.” Jason chuckled and ended up choking back a sob as he hiccuped. “Still, Eric was a master manipulator. He would have trapped anyone.”

  “But he didn’t. He trapped me. Why is it that everyone I love ends up hurting me? Everyone except you, of course.”

  “I don’t know.” Kale smiled at Jason’s faith in him.

  “I would have given anything for her, done anything.”

  “I know.” Kale kept stroking his hair. It was true; when Jason got it in his head to love someone, he gave himself over wholeheartedly. It’s why he kept getting hurt. He didn’t understand the concept of holding himself back, building a wall to guard against pain. Not the way Kale did.

  “Why did she ask me to do the one thing I couldn’t? How would she even be able to love me if I turned my back on you? I could never love someone who would do that.”

  “I guess she just expected you’d do it. To her it’s probably not turning your back on me, it’s turning toward her.”

  “I would have loved her, you know. Just because I loved you first doesn’t mean I wouldn’t have loved her.”

  Kale lifted Jason’s chin so he was staring down into his face. “You are so incredible, you know that? Frankly, you’re too much. No one could ever live up to this idealized vision you have. You don’t even understand how amazing you are. I know you would have loved her; I know you did. Don’t you understand that people can’t comprehend someone being able to love that much?” Jason’s eyes looked up at him, so full of hurt and hope that it pricked at something in his heart. Not able to look at him anymore, Kale simply leaned down and kissed him.

  Jason clung to Kale as if he could make everything better. Kale didn’t know what they were going to do, but he knew what he could do now. Wrapping his arms around Jason, he maneuvered him so that Jason was under him. Once he was situated, he broke the kiss and looked down into Jason’s eyes. Kale shook his head. Everything about Jason amazed him, and it was painful to see him swimming in self-doubt. “No one is worthy of you, least of all me. But you have me; I’m yours. I may not be rich or an intellectual, but I see you for who you are.” Not waiting for a response, Kale descended on him, kissing up the last of the tears on Jason’s cheeks.

  Moving down to kiss his neck, Kale began to unbutton Jason’s waistcoat. Once that was done, he began to undo the buttons on Jason’s shirt, slipping his hands underneath. The first touch of his hands sent tremors through Jason’s flesh and caused Kale to smile. Getting up on his knees, Kale tugged at Jason’s shirt until he rose up just enough for Kale to dispose of the clothing. Kale followed Jason as he lay back down and began kissing his chest. This wasn’t about passion. It was about showing Jason what he thought of him. He covered Jason’s body with slow kisses that could only be described as worshipful. When he reached Jason’s bottom rib, Kale felt a shudder as he suckled it, followed by a sniffle. Looking up, he saw tears coming from Jason’s eyes.

  “What’s wrong?” Kale went back up to his face and stroked Jason’s brow.

  “Nothing, they’re happy tears. I was just wondering how she could ever expect me to give this up.”

  “Well, don’t think about her anymore. I’m here.”

  “Yes, you are.” Jason smiled and lifted his head up for a kiss. Kale was happy to oblige. Moving his hand to the crook of Jason’s neck, Kale deepened the kiss. When he began to feel Jason’s erection against his leg, he broke away. Tonight he wanted to prolong things. He finished undressing Jason and then removed his own clothes. Going back to Jason’s ribs, he picked up where he’d left off. Slowly his lips and hands explored every inch of Jason’s body, paying homage to the man who had given up everything for him. The only place that was left untouched was his cock. That would wait.

  Kale sat up on his knees and gazed down at Jason, marveling at how perfect he looked, pale skin against the dark green of the comforter. If things were different, Kale would have taken him, rough and passionate, but as much as Kale wanted to, he couldn’t. He was the slave and Jason was the master, but more importantly, Jason needed to feel in control right now, empowered. More than anything, Jason needed to know that he had Kale and wasn’t going to lose him.

  Kale reached across the bed and got the oil from the bedside table. Slowly, he prepared himself, locking eyes with Jason and seeing the lust building in them, a lust he knew was mirrored in his own eyes. When he was done, he moved on all fours to Jason’s side and leaned down to whisper in his ear. “I’m ready for you, Master. I’m yours, and I’ll never turn you away.” When he pulled back, he saw a flash of possessiveness in Jason’s eyes before he got up and ran a hand down Kale’s side as he positioned himself behind him.

  “Yes, you’re mine, and I’m never giving you up.” Jason entered him in one long thrust, groaning as Kale gasped. It wasn’t harsh, but it was firm and exactly what both of them needed. For a moment, Jason was still inside Kale, letting him adjust while he rubbed his hands up and down his back murmuring, “Mine.” Then he started thrusting, quickly finding a rhythm. Kale bucked his hips back, meeting each stroke and groaning at the pleasure he felt. Gods, he hoped Jason wouldn’t take long. His body was already thrumming with the effort to hold back. There was no way he was going to allow himself to come first.

  Kale began to grip Jason each time he entered, showing his eagerness and urging him to lose control. Just when Kale thought Jason was close, Jason leaned over him to speak in his ear. “Eager, are we? I don’t know why. You won’t be coming tonight until I say.”

  Kale groaned and buried his head in the bed. At least Jason was back in control where, whether Kale liked it or not, he needed him to be. How had he gotten to the point where this man commanded him so completely? The thought was fleeting; at the moment he didn’t care. All he cared about was completing Jason and then hoping his master would let him come.

  Thankfully, Jason began to pick up the pace. Only trouble now was that the faster pace meant it took all of Kale’s concentration to not come. “You’re mine, Kale; I chose you. Whether you like it or not, you’re the one I’m going to be with.” He liked it all right, he liked it too much. Jason’s hands moved from Kale’s back to grasp his hips painfully. The pain cut through Kale’s need and centered him, giving him something to focus on to keep his orgasm at bay. A few more harsh thrusts and Jason stilled, crying out as he came.

  Spent, Jason fell on Kale and rolled over, bringing him with him so they were spooning. Jason’s hand crept over Kale’s hip and lightly stroked his erection, eliciting a whimper from Kale. “You’re going to have to hold this for me for a while if you want release tonight.” Kale’s only answer was to desperately thrust forward into Jason’s hand. “Are you disobeying me, Kale?”

  Immediately, Kale stilled. “No. Yes. No, Master.”

  “Hmm. Now roll over and take care of me. The sooner you get me ready to go again, the sooner you can come.”

  Kale rolled over and glared at Jason, relaxing boneless and sated with that pleasant post coital glow. Jason laughed. “You really need to learn to control that temper of yours. Patience is a virtue.”

  “One you don’t seem to have.” Kale plopped next to Jason and began to rub his chest.

  Jason laughed and covered Kale’s hand with his own. “True, but I never did claim to be virtuous. You’re the only one who seems to think I’m perfect.”

  “And you’re the only person who seems to think I’m worth anything. I guess we’re cut out for each other.”

  Jason sobered immediately and grabbed Kale by the hair, forcing him to meet his eyes. “Don’t speak like that. Y
ou really think I’d own a worthless slave? That I’d take a worthless man to my bed? Just because you had to settle for me because I was lucky enough to get you doesn’t mean anyone thinks you’re worthless. And anyone who says otherwise can come tell me to my face.”

  Kale marveled at the sincerity in Jason’s voice. He really believed Kale was worthwhile, and he would fight any man who challenged that. He’d lose, but he’d fight them just the same. Jason held Kale’s head firmly in his grip until Kale nodded his understanding. After he was released, Kale got up and fetched a washcloth to clean Jason. By the time he was done, Jason was already beginning to harden again. Wanting his own release, Kale reached down and began to stroke Jason’s shaft back to a full erection. Jason relaxed into the bed and closed his eyes, enjoying the sensation. Looking down on Jason, Kale was so absorbed in studying his face that he was surprised when he felt Jason’s warm hand curl around his own, halting his movement.

  “That’s enough. I have other plans.”

  Kale grabbed the oil, readying to be taken again. Jason reached out and took hold of his wrist. “Give it to me.” Puzzled, Kale handed over the container and watched wide-eyed as Jason poured some out and began to finger himself. Kale froze, not wanting to believe his luck.

  Jason chuckled. “Kale, I know what you need tonight, what you’ve wanted since I came home. I might not have succeeded tonight, but I’m still going to take care of you.”

  Kale’s mouth had gone dry. “I don’t need to; you can take me again.”

  Jason got up on his knees and came flush against Kale. “Yes, you do need it. And even if you didn’t, I do. I need to know you love me, that you want me as much as I want you. Tonight, I need to feel that I’m yours.”

  Kale closed his eyes and shuddered. How well Jason knew him. When he opened his eyes, he saw Jason looking so vulnerable that it was hard to believe he was the same man who had just taken him so forcefully. Leaning forward, he kissed him and felt Jason’s body melt against his. Snaking his hands up his back, he gently lowered him to the bed. Once they were situated, Kale looked down at Jason. “Are you sure?”

  “More sure than I’ve ever been of anything.”

  Kale simply nodded and inserted a finger. He wasn’t going to risk hurting him or worse. After he had carefully stretched Jason out and slathered himself with oil, he lined up his cock and slowly slipped in, groaning as the heat of Jason’s body enveloped his own. Once inside, he settled, letting Jason become accustomed to him. This felt so good, so good to be surrounded by Jason, to feel his heat on his cock, so good to be allowed to do this because Jason sensed it was important and cared enough to let him. He opened his eyes and looked down on Jason who had a look of sheer contentment on his face that made Kale wonder how he’d gotten this lucky.

  “You may come whenever you’re ready, Kale.” Jason clamped down on him to emphasize his point.

  Kale leaned down and kissed Jason on the lips, grasping his head between his hands, as he slowly began to thrust, savoring the moment. When he pulled away, he kept his eyes on Jason’s face, wanting to see all of his reactions. The looks of pure bliss that erupted on Jason’s face gave Kale a feeling of pride at being the one to deliver such pleasure. Kale felt more than ever that he belonged to this man, but he also acknowledged for the first time that Jason belonged to him as well.

  The sheer emotion of the moment was overwhelming. He couldn’t control himself anymore. Quickening the pace, he dropped his head to Jason’s chest and wrapped one arm around him. With his other hand, he reached between their bodies and grabbed Jason’s cock. Even though his head had succumbed to a haze of feeling, he knew that he wanted Jason to come with him. There was no way that he would answer Jason’s generosity with selfishness. It was sloppy work as his pleasure mounted, but he managed to stroke Jason in time with his thrusts.

  Jason’s hands came to Kale’s head, holding him tight and running his fingers through his hair as he moaned in pleasure. Pressed up against Jason’s body, Kale became intoxicated by the heady scent of sweat. Darting his tongue out, he tasted the salt on Jason’s skin, and it made him hungry for more. Groping with lips and tongue, he found Jason’s nipple and began to play with it. The sounds coming from Jason were now more urgent, and Kale felt his hands tighten in his hair. Kale increased the rhythm of his thrusts and stroking until Jason’s grip turned to a vice and he came with a loud growl. Kale released the nipple and shouted out his relief as he came too.

  Once the last wave of pleasure had receded, he rolled off Jason, only to be pulled into a deep kiss. When Jason broke away, he rested on Kale’s chest. The weight felt comfortable and right, and when Kale began to stroke Jason’s back, he felt the most possessive urge he’d ever experienced.

  Jason nuzzled against Kale, and goose bumps began to break out on their skin as the cooling air hit the sheen of sweat that covered them both. “I’m so lucky to have you.”

  “What, you don’t think Demetri would have been as good in the sack? No, I’m the lucky one. I never thought I’d have a master like you.”

  Jason’s voice was heavy with sleep. After two orgasms, he was struggling to stay awake. “Demetri’s an ass, and I was stupid for wanting him. Wouldn’t trade you for the world.”

  “Or a woman.”

  Jason laughed, and Kale thought it was the sweetest sound he had ever heard. “Or a woman.”

  A few minutes later, Jason went limp and heavy on Kale’s chest. The look on his face was so pure and unguarded that it took Kale’s breath away. Yes, Jason was his, he knew that now. Tightening his grip around the other man, Kale also knew that he would do whatever he had to in order to take care of what was his.

  Forty

  Twenty-three. That’s how many pages Kale had turned in his novel, and Jason still hadn’t turned one in his philosophy text. From his position on the sofa, Kale had a clear view of his master sitting at his desk, pretending to study. Not only was Jason not turning the pages in his book, he also wasn’t taking any notes. After an hour of this, Kale set his novel down.

  “Let’s go out.”

  “Hmm?” Jason looked back at Kale as if he had been unaware of his presence. “Oh, no thanks.”

  Five minutes later, Kale got up and put his hands on Jason’s shoulders. “Come on. Your philosophy homework can wait.”

  “No, Kale, it can’t.” This time he didn’t even honor Kale with a glance.

  Kale sighed and tightened his grip on Jason’s shoulders. “Master, this isn’t healthy. You’re not getting any studying done, we both know that. Let’s take a break, and when you come back, you’ll be fresh.”

  This time Jason did look up at him, and Kale immediately wished he hadn’t. The face he saw was of a man desperately trying to keep himself together. “Please, Kale, just give me this. Let me be.”

  How could he not? Setting his lips in a grim line, he nodded, and Jason turned back to his book. Just as Kale was about to pull away, Jason’s hand darted up and patted Kale’s where it rested on his shoulder. Kale felt comfort in the gesture, but not enough to put him at ease. He gave one last squeeze and went back to the sofa, not even bothering to use his novel as cover for his worried glances at Jason. Last night, it appeared, had only been a temporary fix. It had been foolish to think that Kale could make everything better, but he had thought they would weather this together. How could he help if Jason wouldn’t let him?

  The melancholy was palpable, and Kale itched to get away, but he didn’t dare leave Jason when he was like this. The last thing Jason needed was to be alone. The look on his face disturbed Kale. The whole situation was disturbing. Jason was clearly unhappy, and like it or not, Kale was the cause. If he wasn’t in the picture, then none of this would be an issue. Jason had found the perfect woman for him in every way, and he had cavalierly thrown her to the wind in favor of Kale, a slave. How did those words even belong together? A master giving up his own happiness for a slave; it was unsettling.

  Why would Jason do this for him? Kal
e knew that his relationship with his master was special, but he was under no illusions about his status. He wasn’t a lover, he was a slave. A beloved slave, most definitely, but still a slave. Jason made his life comfortable because he was a caring and giving man, far too indulgent, but he was still the master, and it was Kale’s job to make his life easier, not harder.

  What made him worth this kind of sacrifice? What was so special about Kale that he was worthy of this kind of devotion? All he had done was try his best to make Jason happy; any other slave would have done the same. Now Kale’s very presence had taken away any chance of Jason’s happiness. That cut him deep, and he didn’t want to stop and examine why; it was too uncomfortable. All he knew was that it was wrong and every fiber of his being rebelled against letting Jason make himself this miserable. Of course, that was silly and futile. Kale didn’t let Jason do anything. Whatever Jason wanted to do was his prerogative. All Kale could do was sit by and watch.

  Right at the stroke of one o’clock, Kale made his second attempt at getting through to Jason.

  “It’s time for lunch, Master. I’ll go get something from the kitchen and bring it up.” For a moment, Kale thought Jason hadn’t heard him, but when he opened the door to leave, Jason spoke.

  “You’ve wanted to get out of here all day, and it’s not fair to keep you cooped up. Just bring up enough for me. You may take your lunch downstairs.”

  Kale opened his mouth to protest, but thought better of it. Maybe it would be best to have a little break. It was clear that Jason didn’t want him around. A few minutes later, he didn’t even look up when Kale brought him his lunch.

  “Where is everyone, Marge?” Kale ladled out some stew for himself.

  “Oh,” Marge looked up from kneading bread dough, “Simon and Jacob are out with their masters, no doubt getting into trouble, and Charlie is off running some errands.”

  He had been hoping that Simon or Jacob would be around to distract him. Sitting down at the large wooden table, he only lasted one bite before Marge caught on to his mood.