And she wanted him back.
Now and forever.
She just needed a little help admitting it.
21
“THERE’S A WORD FOR THIS, you know,” Sabrina said nearly a week after Billy’s declaration, when she opened her motel room door to find him standing on her doorstep. Again.
The devil danced in his eyes as he grinned. “Dating?”
She ignored the thumping of her heart and glared. “Harassment. You’ve shown up every night this week.” Every night at exactly the same time. So punctual she could have set her clock by him.
As if his presence, so tall and sexy and reliable, wasn’t bad enough, he’d come bearing gifts. Monday he’d shown up with a dozen pink roses. Tuesday, he’d brought a box of chocolate-covered strawberries. Wednesday had been cupcakes from Sarah’s bakery. Today?
She eyed the starched Wranglers and pressed Western shirt. He’d traded the frayed straw cowboy hat for a sleek black one, his boots shiny and polished. He handed her a clear florist’s box with a wrist corsage nestled inside.
“What’s this for?”
“The Elks are having their monthly dinner and dance. While most of the guys are married, there are a dozen or so who are widowers. They gather in the back once the band kicks up to play dominoes and shoot the shit.” He shrugged. “I thought you might find a few prospects for Ethel.”
“That’s a great tip. I’ll head over later on—”
“You can’t get in without a ticket.”
“I’ll buy one.”
“It’s members only. Eli’s taking Melba to a movie tonight, so he slipped me his.” He waved the slips of paper. “If you want to go, you have to go with me.”
“You could be a nice guy and give me one of your tickets.”
“And sit home all by my lonesome while you have all the fun?” He shook his head. “Not happening.”
She thought of her plans for that night—sitting in her usual booth at the diner, hoping and praying for a new face to come in for the dinner special. She’d met all of two single senior men over the past few days, and both had been spoken for. They’d been picking up dinner for their intended, which meant she needed a new plan.
“Okay, but this isn’t a date. That means no funny business.”
He arched an eyebrow, his sensual mouth hinting at a grin. “Define what you mean by funny?”
“I mean it, Billy. No funny business. No thinking about any funny business.” He didn’t look convinced, so she added, “You stay on your side of the truck and I stay on mine. Tonight we’re just two friends accompanying one another to a dinner dance.”
His grin widened. “Whatever you say.”
“Promise me.” Her heart pounded for several long seconds as she held his gaze. “Please,” she finally added.
As if he sensed her desperation, his expression faded and he nodded. “Just friends.”
* * *
“THIS IS MY FRIEND, Sabrina Collins.” Billy introduced Sabrina for the umpteenth time to one of the elderly couples standing near the punch table and she did her best not to frown.
They were just friends, she reminded herself.
Which meant it shouldn’t bother her when he said the word. Or left her sitting alone to dance with Mrs. Meyers, the chairperson for the event. Or Mrs. Davenport, wife of the head Elk. Or Mrs. Carlisle, newly widowed and president of the senior ladies’ crochet circle.
She watched Billy lead the small, round woman around the dance floor. Her silver hair piled high on top of her head in a monstrous beehive. Bright orange lipstick matched the blinding shades of her flower print dress and her white patent leather shoes gleamed in the dim lighting. With every turn, Sabrina glimpsed the top edge of her knee-high panty hose just below her hemline. On top of that, the woman was three times his age.
It’s not like Sabrina had anything to be jealous of if they had been more than friends.
Which they weren’t.
“Where’s the domino group?” she asked the minute he walked back to their table. “The band’s playing so they should be out back by now, right?” She pushed to her feet. “Lead the way.”
“I promised Miss Earline I’d dance with her first.”
“Then point me in the right direction and then go dance with Miss Earline.”
He eyed her for a long moment and a light twinkled in the depths of his eyes. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you’re jealous. But then that would mean that you actually do care and you’ve made it clear that you don’t.”
“I’m not jealous, I’m anxious. I’ve got a lot of work waiting for me back in L.A. I need to get this done and get out of here.”
He eyed her for a long moment before he seemed to come to some conclusion. “Follow me.”
A few minutes later, she found herself smack-dab in the middle of man heaven. Senior man heaven, that is. There were two dozen widowers in Lost Gun. All eager to find the next Mrs. Right. Provided she could cook as good as Shirley, or clean as well as Bernice, or rub a pair of feet as well as Corrine—God rest her soul. Every single man gathered in the domino room wanted to find a woman, and while a few of them weren’t too jazzed about that woman being Ethel, more than half were willing to give her a try.
Two hours later, Sabrina stood on the doorstep of her motel room, profiles in hand, and stared at the man who’d walked her to her room.
“Thanks for tonight.” She stuck out her hand to shake his, desperate to keep the distance between them and end the evening before she surrendered to the waves of emotion inside her and plant one on his lips. “I wouldn’t have even known about the dinner dance if it wasn’t for you and I want you to know that I really appreciate everything.”
He stared at her, into her. “I don’t want your thanks.”
Her hand fell away. “Please, Billy. Don’t—”
“I want you.”
“It could never work. You live here and I don’t. I could never be happy in a place like this.” Even if she had grown sort of fond of all the senior ladies that she’d met, and the strong black coffee they served up at the diner and even the chicken fried steak. “I don’t belong here.”
And then she turned and walked away from him, because after years of clinging to her newfound city ways and keeping her distance from the small-town girl she’d once been, she didn’t know if she had the strength or the courage to let go.
Not that she wanted to. She was happy just the way she was.
Wasn’t she?
* * *
SHE WAS HAPPY.
That’s what she told herself the next day as she narrowed down her newfound prospects to the three most perfect matches for Ethel and tried to forget Billy and the way he’d made love to her so furiously at the river. The way he’d tried his best to woo her the past few days. The way he’d stayed close to her at the dinner, his hand at the small of her back, possessive yet comforting at the same time. The way he’d said “I want you” last night.
Distance, she told herself. Out of sight, out of mind.
Which was why she did her best to look the other way when he showed up at the Bingo Hall on Friday night.
With a date.
She eyed the plain young woman wearing a pair of jeans and a Western shirt. She wasn’t at all what Sabrina would have pictured, but then she never would have expected him to show up with another woman in the first place.
Proof that she was just as poor a judge of character as her mother. As weak. As gullible.
Really? You told him there was no chance and now you want to throw a pity party because he finally got the message and is now getting on with his life?
She watched him steer the young woman to a nearby table and pure longing shot through her.
Because she wanted to be that woman.
She wanted Billy beside her, smiling at her, loving her.
And he wanted someone else.
Walk away. That’s what she should have done. What she’d wanted her own mother to do. But the woman had never had the strength. The balls.
But it wasn’t about that, she realized as she stood there, her heart pounding in her chest. Billy had been right. Her mother hadn’t stayed because she’d been weak. She’d stayed because she’d been too strong to walk away, to give up her chance at happiness. She’d wanted to fight for it.
Just as Sabrina wanted to fight right now.
And while it hadn’t worked out for her mother any more than it might work out for her, she knew that she would never forgive herself if she didn’t at least try.
Panic bolted through her and she was on her feet before she could stop herself. She crossed the room in a few heartbeats and grabbed his arm.
“You can’t do this,” she blurted as her gaze collided with his. “Please. You can’t. Not yet.” She paused to drink in a frantic breath. “Not until you hear what I have to say. I love you,” she rushed on before she lost her courage. “I always have, I just didn’t want to tell you because I was afraid that it would put me at a disadvantage because I’ve always seen love as a weak emotion. But it’s not. It takes courage to love. To admit love. To be in love. My mother had that courage, but my father was the one who didn’t. He was the weak one. That’s why he left. I know that now. I also know you’re not him. You could never be him. That’s why you can’t do this.”
“I have to.”
The words tightened a vise around her heart and tears burned her eyes. “You can’t. You can’t date someone else, because I want to date you. I want to marry you.”
He arched an eyebrow at her. “Is that a proposal?”
“Yes. So don’t do this. Don’t give up on me and start dating someone else.”
“He’s not on a date.” The woman sitting nearby gave her a horrified look. “Hells bells, I wouldn’t date the likes of Billy Chisholm. He’s just dropping me off on account of my granddaddy’s here and he can’t see well enough to read his own bingo cards.”
“I was doing some work out at her granddaddy’s place and she needed a ride. Since you mentioned that you were coming tonight, I figured I would show up, too.”
Her gaze swiveled back to Billy as realization hit. “You mean I rushed over here and made a fool of myself for nothing?”
“You rushed over here and made a fool of yourself because you love me and I love you. I do, you know. I have since the first moment I saw you standing at that bar.” His grin faded and a serious light gleamed in his eyes. She saw the sincerity in his gaze, and felt it in her heart, and she knew. She gave in to the longing inside and threw herself into his embrace. Strong arms wrapped around her and held her tight.
“I love you so much,” he murmured into her hair. “I love everything about you. I love the clothes you wear and the way you look curled up in my bed and the way your eyes glitter when you’re mad. Everything. And that’s never going to change. No matter how much you try to piss me off or push me away.”
She pulled back and stared up at him, tears streaming down her face, happiness overflowing her heart. “You’re stubborn, you know that?”
He grinned. “I learned from the best.”
Warmth coursed through her and she smiled. “You really think I’m the best?”
“Most of the time. The rest of the time, I think I want to kill you, but I still love you regardless.” A serious light touched his gaze. “I meant what I said. I want you. I want marriage and babies and a future, and I want it all with you. Only you. I don’t care where we live. If you hate it here, we can move.”
“I can’t do that.”
He stiffened. “Are you saying that you don’t want to marry me?”
“I’m saying that I can’t move away from here. I actually like it here.”
“What about the website?”
“FindMeACowboy.com is Livi’s brainchild, and now she’s got the funding to make it a reality. I wrote the business proposal and worded all of the profile requirements, but now my work is done. Kat’s doing the website and we’re well past the idea phase. They don’t need me anymore. Besides, I’ve got an idea of my own I’d like to work on.”
“A job at the newspaper?”
“I was thinking more along the lines of a matchmaking service for seniors right here in Lost Gun. I could start with a storefront and then branch out on the web.”
“So you’re staying?”
“Only if you make an honest woman of me.”
He grinned and drew her close. “You’ve got yourself a deal.”
Epilogue
“THIS IS A WASTE of time,” Billy Chisholm announced to his two brothers as he tossed a shovel full of dirt to the side and stared at the pastureland rutted with holes in all directions. “We’ve been digging for over four weeks now and we haven’t found anything.”
“It’s here,” Jesse said, but he didn’t sound nearly as confident as he once had. “It has to be.”
“Unless Big Earl is wrong,” Cole pointed out. “The man’s ancient. Maybe he hallucinated the connection to Silas.”
Jesse shook his head. “Casey confirmed his confession.”
“Yeah, but she’s got nothing to go on except his word. That brings me back to my first theory—Big Earl could be wrong.”
He was wrong.
That was the conclusion that Billy had come to weeks ago. Big Earl was wrong and this was just a waste and it was high time the Chisholm brothers admitted defeat and went back to their lives.
A pretty great life, at least in Billy’s opinion.
He had one now thanks to the woman waiting back at his cabin. Sabrina had moved in just over a week ago after giving up her apartment in L.A. and moving to Lost Gun for good. They’d announced their engagement just a few days ago and were now planning a wedding to follow on the heels of the PBR finals in November.
Billy hadn’t wanted to wait, but Sabrina had been determined to keep him focused on his first championship. Thanks to the Lost Gun win, and the Houston Live Stock Show and Rodeo win right on its heels, Billy was a leading contender. He still had a long way to go, but if he kept performing the way he’d been, he was a shoo-in for the buckle.
“You’re going to win,” Sabrina had told him. “And then we’ll get married. I don’t want you worried about anything.”
But he wasn’t worried. For the first time in his life, Billy felt relaxed and confident and anxious. He wanted to say “I do” even more than he wanted a PBR championship.
But he also wanted to make Sabrina happy and so he’d agreed to wait. But only if she promised to let him help her with the wedding details. Because when it came to Sabrina, he had no problem making up his mind. She was his world. His future.
Which was why he was more than ready to give up this wild goose chase and get home. He’d come clean to Sabrina about the possibility that the money still existed and she’d been nothing but encouraging. There’d been no probing questions, no pushing for information, nothing to indicate that she was a journalist at heart. Because she wasn’t. She’d found happiness in her matchmaking business, just as he’d found happiness in his bull-riding.
Still, she’d urged him to look, to help his brothers and lay the past to rest.
At the same time, Billy had already done that. He’d made peace and it was time to let sleeping dogs lie.
“The money’s not here,” Billy said again. Still, he rammed his shovel into the ground anyway, hard, eager to scoop up as much loose dirt as possible and prove a point.
And that’s when he felt it.
The budge of resistance as the hard metal edge met something a few inches below the surface. He signaled Jesse and Cole
and the three of them went to work on the spot.
A few breathless moments later, Billy retrieved a nearby lantern and held it up to reveal a large metal box.
His heart pounded in his chest as he broke the lock and pushed open the lid, and then the truth crystallized.
They’d done it. They’d really and truly done it.
After all these years and a world of heartache, they’d finally found the missing money.
* * * * *
Be sure to look for Kimberly Raye’s last book in her trilogy about the sexy Chisholm brothers—
TEXAS OUTLAWS: COLE!
Available from Harlequin Blaze in March 2014.
Keep reading for an excerpt from GAME ON by Nancy Warren.
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1
“HEY, DYLAN, GRAB the fire hose,” Max Varo joked as the homemade chocolate cake laden with thirty-five burning candles made its way into the Shawnigan family rec room. The cake wobbled slightly in June Shawnigan’s hands as she broke into a soprano rendition of “Happy Birthday to You.” The fifty or so people singing along were assorted friends and family of Adam Shawnigan, June’s baby, thirty-five today.
She suspected his surprise party hadn’t been a surprise for more than a nanosecond—he was a detective, after all—but he was putting on a good face for the celebration.
Texas Outlaws: Billy Page 16