Chapter 15
Carl
Fuck— fuck— fuck— Standing in my shower, I ground my knuckles against the tiled wall as memories from last night blasted through my mild hangover. Behind my shuttered lids, all I could see was Melissa in her little, black dress, her face contorted in pleasure as she rode my cock. Between my clenched teeth, all I could taste was her skin on my tongue. Her perky, C-cup breasts against my cheeks and the sound of her panting ringing in my ears.
I fucked up so bad. I slept with a patient.
Bile sloshed up my throat, and I clamped a hand over my mouth as I whipped around to dry heave into the toilet. Colorful spots assault the darkness behind my eyelids, and I gripped the edge of the toilet to arch sharply. Spitting the bare contents of my stomach, I trembled under the weight of how badly I'd messed up.
My stomach roiled dangerously as I sank to my knees, and I panted from the force of my heaves. I should've just drank at home. I slept with Melissa...
And our four minutes together was absolutely the most amazing four minutes of drunken pleasure I'd ever given a woman. I never wanted to leave my car, to lose count of the freckles on her chest— to slide out of her tight pussy and pretend it hadn't happened.
So many excuses raced through my dazed mind, blocking out the sound of the shower, and I managed a shallow breath heavy with water. We were both drunk, and she was so damned beautiful with her pale skin in that black dress. I was on my sixth beer, and she had a margarita the size of fucking Manhattan on her table. Technically, I'd already sent Sahper her referral, but she'd never made an appointment with him.
I slept with my patient. My hands shook wildly as I grabbed my phone off the vanity to call my sister, and I slumped against the toilet heavily. My gut churned with dread, and I closed my eyes and prayed Laurie would answer the phone so early in the morning.
"Hello..." Slurring thickly from sleep, Laurie's voice slithered into my ears, and I choked out an unintelligible sound. Shoving my knuckles between my teeth, I flung my head back and struggled to breathe as the line crackled overly loud. "Carl? What's wrong? Are you okay?"
"I had sex with Mel—" Blurting out those horrible five words, my mouth dried as I saw my life flash behind my eyelids. "Laurie— Laurie, I fucked up. I slept with a patient— oh, my fucking God—"
"What? Carl, you did what?" Alarm cleared Laurie's tone, and I shuddered violently as I covered my face in shame. "Carl— no... come on. You know better than to do that."
"I was on the phone with Mom, and I ducked into this bar... When I came out of the bathroom, Mel was there, and... I don't know what happened, Laurie. She's still my patient even thought I referred her out to a doctor in Providence." I couldn't blame it all on Mom, but God damn if she didn't shut the fuck up about her boyfriend...! Was this how Mel felt when her dad never asked how she was? All my mom talked about was her relationship, and as happy as I was for her happiness... she stopped asking me about how I was. Last night, she didn't even ask how my day was, just launching into a huge rant about how wonderful Augustus was, and how they were going to Vegas over the weekend. "I'm freaking the fuck out—"
"Okay— okay, so just breathe, Carl. You were both drunk, and she's not going to be your patient anymore, right? So, all you gotta do is have her make that appointment in Providence, get her to go, and it'll be chill, right?" It wasn't exactly that simple, but I found my sister vocalizing the process comforting. Basically, the gist of it was... I just had to hope somehow to run into Melissa again. "What's her number? You can't contact her, Carl. I'll text her and tell her to make the appointment as soon as she can. It's gonna be okay. We can mitigate this."
"It's not okay!"
"Carl! Damnit! Why are you so shitty at handling personal crisis! Don't make me drive five hours to come smack some sense into you!" My sister's sharp voice whipped across my brain, and I winced hard. "God, you know, you're a good doctor, and a great guy, but if you do anything anyone can perceive as remotely deviant, you think you're the worst. Really, do you honestly think anyone is gonna find out? After the false allegations against you, no one is going to be thinking you're capable of something like this, Carl.
"Seriously, you need to lower your standards. You're a human being, and sometimes, we make mistakes. At least, you have the ability to cover your ass. You referred this Melissa girl out to another doctor, right? So, you did your duty to your ethical standards. Just because she didn't make an appointment yet doesn't mean you're at fault for getting drunk and banging her."
Sourness coated my tongue and inner cheeks, and I ground my teeth as I slowly, carefully processed my sister's hard words.
"Besides— who's gonna tell anyone? Not you, and not her, and that bitch that slapped you with false allegations isn't even in the same state as you anymore. The only reason anyone will find out is if you snitch on yourself. And don't you even think about doing that!"
I forcibly kept my mouth shut as Laurie's question seeped deep into the crevices of my brain. She was right— Melissa wouldn't say anything, and I wouldn't say anything... and no one else knew about it. Some of the tension seeped out of my shoulders and down the ceramic bowl against my back, and it suddenly became a little easier to breathe.
"You are a great man, Carl, but for God's sake... you really, really need to learn to bend your back a little. You don't have to make a habit of breaking the rules, but you slipped up, and it wasn't even that bad a slip up. It's not like you screwed her in an exam room or something, stone cold sober, with no intention of trying to cover your ass. Okay, you did most of it right, and that's gonna have to be enough."
I inhaled deeply through flared nostrils, and my heart slowed its furious pace as Laurie sighed.
"You know, I think I'm the one that's supposed to call you after a bad hookup, not the other way around."
"You've always been the levelheaded one, Laurie. I... I just thought I was better than this... The Code of Ethics is a thing for a reason, and I've gone and broken one of the most important ones. You wouldn't sleep with a client, would you? No."
"I couldn't say that with certainty, Carl. I would do exactly what you did if I were in your position with a client. I'd refer him to another lawyer and just be careful not to use what privileged knowledge I have about him professionally in his personal life. You said it yourself— you didn't break any confidentiality clauses with her information. In your own words, you just keep bumping into each other, and you find yourself wanting to more and more. That's not unethical. That's simple human attraction. You're a doctor, you should know how it works, Carl."
"... I'm sorry for waking you up." The line crackled lightly, and the blood drumming in my ears died down a little. "Sometimes, I think we should've been born the other way around."
"My alarm was going to go off in ten minutes, anyway. What's Melissa's number so I can shoot her a text?" Taking my phone from my ear to thumb the screen, I exhaled a shuddering breath and wiped my eyes and face with my free hand. Laurie was ten years younger than me, but in times like this, it felt like the roles were reversed. She was so calm and cool, determinable, even. Relationships weren't something she got flustered about, and I was beyond grateful that I had called her instead of stewing in my own shitty thoughts. Giving her Mel's number, I inhaled sharply and cleared my throat of the dense lump that clogged it.
"Okay. I'll text her right now. You just... don't snitch on yourself, Carl, okay? I know you want to, and you feel like it may help ease whatever punishment you think will happen if you're truthful, but just give it a week or two for Mel to switch doctors."
"Yeah, okay. I may call out today. I don't have any appointments. I was just doing admin work." Glancing around the steamed bathroom, I climbed to my feet as Laurie grunted in acknowledgment in my ear. "I'm sorry, again, for waking you up."
"I need that extra ten minutes to grill you about Mom going to Vegas? I didn't know about that. What did she say? How long is she going? Who's paying for it? What's up with that shit?" Blastin
g me with questions, Laurie sounded increasingly frustrated. "Doesn't she see he's an asshole? Maybe she didn't tell me because I'm not as polite about disliking him as you."
"I'll call you back, okay? I'm gonna shoot my secretary a text and convince myself you're right." I hung up before Laurie could hound me for answers, and I heaved a massive breath. "Fuck... What do I do, now?"
My question had no answer other than the pounding of water on tile, and I ran my hand through my wet hair to shake my head. The obvious solution is to talk to Mel, but I couldn't until after she did her intake at Sahper's practice. Chances are, if I leave my apartment, I'll run into her by some fucked up twist of fate... so I think I'll stay in today.
Chapter 16
Melissa
Yawning as I stared blankly through the television screen, I sniffled hard through my swollen sinuses. My eyes watered constantly, and the stress of the past few weeks seemed to finally catch up to me. I hate May, and the past two weeks had been particularly miserable. All of a sudden, all the trees decided to attack me, and I hadn't been able to do anything.
Terry offered to get my groceries, for God's sake. I'd watched almost everything on my Watchlist on Netflix. I got a Hulu subscription because I ran out of stuff to watch!
I scowled as I wiped my eyes with a tissue, pulling my knees higher to dig my toes into the sofa cushion. My CPAP machine was my only saving grace, and my allergy medication wasn't helping.
"After the universe spent so much time getting Carl and I together, now it's punishing me for it." My nasally grumble made my intense migraine flare, and my scowl darkened as I reached to rub my nose between the butts of my palms. "Ugh..."
Carl's sister's call still rang in my ears, that he felt so panicked and was downright paranoid about losing his job. I'd made the appointment with the other pulmonologist in Providence as soon as she hung up, and they were able to get me in two days later.
But that didn't excuse the fact that I put him in jeopardy for a quickie I couldn't quite remember all that well. Of course, I knew he knew that I'd transferred to another doctor, but I hadn't actually seen him. Through my bleary, watering eyes, I couldn't see anything at all.
For almost two weeks, I'd contemplated texting Carl, but what could I say? Lol sorry for maybe killing your career but you dtf?
No.
My doorbell rang, snapping me out of my muddled misery, and I groaned loudly as I flung my legs over the front of the sofa. My muscles ached in protest when I stood up, and the room spun a little as I shuffled heavily. The soles of my feet never left the carpet, and I hiked up my pajama shorts with sluggish, shaky hands.
I wheezed just from the minimal effort it took to round the couch and reach the front door, and I pulled open the barrier with a jerk. My dad stood on the other side, his hair combed over and his cheeks red enough to reach past his ears.
"... I came to apologize, Mel."
Instantly, I was on guard as my dad's voice knocked around in my head painfully. Frowning when he cleared his throat, I had to squint to really see his features twist in discomfort.
"Can I come in?"
"No, you can stay right there and say what you need to say."
He tensed, my dad, like this was so hard for him, and my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth. Pointing an accusatory finger at him, my head threatened to explode as heat slithered up my neck.
"What do you want, huh? Just say it, so I can tell you to fuck off because I'm not doing anything for you. You're only apologizing because you want something— otherwise, why would you be nervous, huh? Not because you screwed me over, surely!"
I practically shouted, my lungs on fire as I stabbed my dad in the chest with my fingernail. My slow brain couldn't pinpoint what about his demeanor told me he was only apologizing to ask for something else, but even my swollen face couldn't hold back my words. In the apartment next to mine, I heard a loud, muffled thump, and my wheezing intensified as my dad rubbed his palms on his shirt.
"I got married, and I want you to meet her. I offered to have it here because my house is a mess." That irritation that gripped me vanished— sizzled from my blood as my heart and lungs seized up in shock. My dad took a half step forward, looking a little desperate, and my eyes widened when he grabbed my shoulders gently. "Please, Mel. Just do this for me, and I'll leave you alone for the rest of my life. I really need this to go well. She's got two kids and neither of them like me— her daughter's your age. After today, you never have to worry about me anymore."
For a long moment, I was silent, trying to process what my dad had revealed and what he was asking of me. He watched me with hope blossoming on his face, so clear that even I could see it beyond my thick sheen of tears. I'll leave you alone for the rest of my life. After today, you won't have to worry about me anymore.
"... After today, if you ever contact me again for any reason, I'm going to ruin your life. Understand? After today, you're not my dad anymore. You're just a pathetic, money-grubbing piece of shit I'm unfortunately related to. And I'm not gonna lie to this stupid, poor woman you're leeching off of. I'm not gonna sink to your level." Disgust engulfed my whole body when my dad perked up, and I clenched my hands into tight fists by my sides. "What time?"
"4:30. Thank you, Mel—"
"I'm not doing this for you, you pig!" My screech echoed down the hallway, and my dad jumped in shock as the urge to punch him almost overwhelmed me. "Get the fuck away from me! I can't stand to even look at you!"
Throwing my hands up— like I was some animal and looking bigger made me more intimidating— I trembled as my dad scurried toward the elevator. Did he not see how awful I looked?
No, he did. He just doesn't care. Sniffling harshly, I reached to wipe the snot dripping from my nose with my tissue as I glared at my dad's back. He was just a sperm donor, never a dad.
"Mel—" My head whipped to the side, and Terry held up his hands in surrender. "You know it's three in the afternoon, right?"
"What?" The last time I looked at the clock, it wasn't even 10 a.m., and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. My apartment was a mess, and there wasn't even time to order something and get back here. I couldn't even properly dress myself up! As if sensing where my thoughts were going, Terry walked over to grab my bicep and squeeze comfortingly. "Jason and I will help you. I don't know why you're worried about getting all dolled up, though, considering..."
"You heard him if it 'goes good', he'll leave me alone forever. I— I— what...?" Dizziness blurred Terry's concerned features, and I squeezed my eyes shut tightly to take a stabilizing breath. "I'll make this place the Met Gala if it means getting away from him."
"Then, the Met Gala you shall have." Terry's eyes blazed with determination, and I flung my arms around him to hug him with all my meager strength. I was so friggin lucky to have a friend like him, and he patted my back firmly before pulling back to cup my flaming cheeks. "You take a cold shower and sniff some curry or something. I'll get Jason onboard."
"You're amazing, Terry." He winked at me before disappearing back into his apartment, and I leaned on the door frame heavily. "... What just happened?"
Why was I going to bother getting dressed and hiding how enflamed my face was? Why was I going to waste makeup trying to disguise how red and puffy my eyes were? What was the point of stressing out about making food I didn't even want to eat to impress someone I'd never see again?
Because this time, my dad said he'd leave my life. Permanently. And he might be lying like usual to get me to do what he wanted, but I was going to hold him to it. I knew about his fudged books. I knew about his gross overcharging and hiding his money from the IRS. I knew about the employees he'd underpaid and threatened, and I knew that with one phone call, I could destroy him.
Hopefully, he realized that I would do it. It'd take a while, but I would eventually work up the courage to make that call.
"This woman has a kid my age." Does that mean I was going to have to entertain some sniveling, spoilt teenage
boy in my apartment? Misery slumped my shoulders, and I cupped my forehead as I took a shallow, wheezing breath. At least she's not my age... I guess... "This is so messed up."
Chapter 17
Carl
"I just think it's fucked that he wants to go to his kid's apartment rather than his own home, Laurie. That's all. My opinion of him couldn't get any lower, but I was wrong, apparently." My sister nodded across the center console of my car, and I flexed my grip on the wheel. "I wonder what's so important that Mom couldn't say on the phone..."
"Whatever it is, I'm sure we're not gonna like it." Pulling up on the curb, I ducked to peer up at the apartment complex warily. Smack on the edge of town, I didn't know such a nice place existed, otherwise I would've put in an inquiry. "I hope this chick's not trying to be my best friend."
"I hope she's not anything like her father." There was so much uncertainty around this 'get together', and I turned off my car to sit back and sigh heavily. "Let's get this over with. I don't want to stay forever. I have a panel meeting tomorrow that I have to prepare for."
"You're telling me. I'm not gonna make my morning class tomorrow, I don't think. But— hey, better Mom's relationship drama than your own. You're not the least bit worried about that Mel girl ghosting you?"
Frowning thinly, I shook my head as I twirled my keys against my palm. Melissa wasn't the kind of girl to ghost someone, and the air quality had tanked so hard I expected to see her in the ER at some point. My sister shrugged lightly, her thin, pale green shirt sliding off her slender shoulder out of the corner of my eye.
"I'm just sayin'— it seems kinda fishy."
"I'd bet all the money in my bank account that she's been taking the blooming season really hard."
"That's still not an excuse not to text you, but whatever."
My Forbidden Doctor: A Secret Baby Medical Romance Page 8