by Lucy Eden
“We have fifteen minutes to get out of here. Are you almost done?”
“Give me five minutes.”
Back at the apartment we ordered room service and spent the night making love. It was going to be our last night together and it was bitter sweet. I kept wondering if every time would be the last time, then she’d reach for me again. I wondered if every laugh was the last laugh, every kiss the last kiss, or every private joke would be the last one we shared. I was missing her and she was still in my arms. I was in the middle of Frank Lloyd Wright’s autobiography and I read aloud to her until she drifted off on my chest. I tried to stay up as long as I could watching her sleep but my eyes grew heavy and soon I joined her.
I woke up and reached for Kimberly, but she was gone. I assumed she’d gotten up to make herself a cup of tea, but when she didn’t come back after a few minutes I decided to go find her. I expected to her to be curled up on the couch with her tablet, doing a crossword puzzle or reading a book, but the apartment was dark and quiet. When I called her name, she didn’t answer. Her bedroom, the guest bedroom, both balconies and the roof deck were empty. She was gone.
I went back to her bedroom and sat on the bed, trying not to panic. Maybe, she decided to go for a walk in the middle of the night, without telling me or leaving a note or taking her phone.
Her phone was on her nightstand charging. Kimberly definitely wouldn’t leave without her phone. I jumped up to go get dressed and look for her when I heard a noise coming from her bathroom. The door was shut and the light was off.
“Kimberly?”
She answered with a retching sound, followed by a splash and a series of small coughs.
“Kimberly.” I grabbed the handle and tugged. It was locked. “Let me in.” I tried to temper the panic in my voice. “Please.” No answer. I was preparing to break down the door when I heard her small voice choked with sobs.
“Go back to bed, Adam.” She sniffled. “I’m fine.”
She threw up again.
“Unlock the door.” A feeling of helplessness had joined my fear. “Please, I just want to know if you’re okay. Let me help.”
“No, I don’t want you to see me like this.” She sobbed even harder then threw up again. That was it. I had to break the door down. Adrenaline flooded my system as I took a few steps back from the door preparing to charge it, shoulder first.
Then I stopped.
I sat down on the floor and rested my forehead on the wood panel. I thought about how easily the door would splinter with just the smallest amount of force, how I could wrap Kimberly in my arms, take her back to our bed, and fix whatever was wrong. But I couldn’t do that. She was the only one who could fix whatever was wrong. I could help. I wanted to help but only if she wanted my help.
“Kimberly?” I tried to keep my voice as calm as possible. “What if I came in, but I didn’t turn on the light? Then I wouldn’t see you.” No response, but a series of small sobs.
“It smells really bad in here.”
“Well, according to you, it can’t be worse than my morning breath.” Her laugh from the other side of the door made my shoulders relax. “Come on, Princess. Let me in.” The Guinness Book of World Records holder for the longest minute in history passed before I heard the lock click.
The door creaked as I slowly pushed it open and crawled in. The scent of Kimberly’s lotion was overwhelmed by what smelled like rotten fruit or a night club at four in the morning. I crawled around on the cold tile floor until I found Kimberly’s small foot and felt my way up her body until my hand was resting on her back, where I rubbed gently in a circle.
“Hey,” I whispered.
“Hey,” she replied and sniffled.
I reached over her, feeling in the dark for the handle of the toilet and flushed. Within seconds the smell of rotten fruit almost disappeared telling me that even when Kimberly was sick she was incapable of making a mess.
“Why didn’t I think of that?” she asked with a weak laugh.
“That’s why they pay me the big bucks.” I rubbed her back with both hands. “I think you were a little preoccupied or you definitely would have.”
She chuckled again and retched with no result, followed by more coughs. I rubbed harder until her coughing stopped.
“I’m gonna get you some water. Stay put.” Silence. “Okay?”
“Okay.”
After I felt my way out of the bathroom, I walked into the kitchen, grabbed the phone and ordered some food just in case Kimberly got hungry. She was at the point of dry heaving so she must have thrown up everything in her stomach. I wet two dishtowels: one with warm water and one with cold, and filled a glass with room temperature water. I also started the kettle on low, just in case.
When I got back to the bathroom she was in the exact same spot. She had stopped heaving and sobbing, just sniffling occasionally.
“Hey, I’m here.” I put the cool towel across the back of her neck and wiped her face with the warm one.
“Thank you,” she whispered. She took the glass of water from my hand. I could hear her swishing before she spit the mouthful of water into the toilet. She drank the rest and I heard a faint clinking noise as she set glass down on the tiled floor. “I don’t think I can do this.”
“What do you mean?” I was wondering if I somehow caused this. Maybe today was too overwhelming, not to mention I almost fucked everything up by not reading an email correctly.
“I don’t know what made me think I could handle this. I’m only twenty-four. I’m the youngest person in my department. I didn’t even apply for this job. I was a summer intern. My boss convinced me to work for her and put off applying to law schools. I should’ve focused on law school. I don’t belong here. I’m going fuck this up somehow. I know it.” She started sobbing again. I wrapped my arms around her and kissed the top of her head. It killed me to hear her in so much pain and not realizing that none of what she was saying was true. I also felt like an asshole because I was relieved she wasn’t talking about me.
“Kimberly…” I hesitated. I wanted to tell her she was wrong. I wanted to convince her how amazing and perfect she was, but instead I said, “What else?”
She sniffled and said, “What?”
“What else are you worried about? Talk to me about it.” I felt her searching for my hand in the darkness. I found hers and interlocked our fingers. I placed my other hand on her back and rubbed gently.
Kimberly started talking and I listened. She listed a few more reasons why she was nervous about the meeting. She talked about her career goals and never feeling talented enough, smart enough or prepared enough. She talked about feeling like she always had to prove that she belonged, despite never being able to convince herself that she did. I got the feeling Kimberly told me a lot of things she’d never told anyone else.
I couldn’t imagine a room where she wasn’t the smartest person. Seeing her in action today convinced me that she had exactly what it took to manage a huge construction project or anything else she wanted. If she was half as amazing as she was at tracking down that model today at tomorrow’s meeting, WP would walk away with that contract, no question. I also knew that even without anxiety disorder, Kimberly had to deal with a lot of shit that I would never understand or experience. Seeing her like this made me feel sad, angry and helpless. How the fuck did she handle it? She was so strong. What the hell did my brother say about Abby the other day?
“I’m lucky to have someone so patient and strong. A lot of people might not be.”
I held Kimberly tighter. A crazy part of me was hoping that if I squeezed hard enough some of her pain would transfer to me and I could help her bear the weight.
By the time Kimberly stopped talking she was sitting in my lap with her head on my chest. We sat in the dark for what felt like an eternity in complete silence except for the occasional sniffle. They weren’t all hers and I was grateful she couldn’t see me. The kettle whistled loudly making us jump.
“Do you w
ant some tea?” I felt her nod against my chest. “Do you want me to bring it in here or do you want to go back to bed?”
“Bed, please.”
“Do you want to stay in your room or go back to mine?”
“Yours is bigger,” she said. I chuckled and was hit with an immediate pang of sadness, wondering if I’d ever laugh again after she left tomorrow.
fourteen
Adam
“You do know I can walk, right?”
“Yup. I love watching you do it.”
“Then why are you carrying me?” Her arms were wrapped around my neck and her head was resting on my shoulder.
“Macho bullshit, Princess.” I smiled and kissed the top of her head. “Part of the package.
“Well, in that case…” She hugged me tighter and nuzzled into my neck, tickling me with her warm breath.
We made a pit stop in the kitchen where I turned off the kettle and she told me which flavor tea she wanted. In my room, I tucked her into bed and she let me kiss her after I brought her mouthwash. While I made her tea the food arrived. I pushed the cart in the room and rolled it to a stop on her side of the bed.
“Adam! What the hell? I can’t even think about eating now.”
I ignored her and started uncovering the dishes.
“Here’s some dry toast: white, wheat, multigrain, rye & sunflower. We have three kinds of soup: Chicken, Tomato bisque and corn chowder. Three flavors of Gatorade, three flavors of Vitamin Water, and two fruit and cheese plates with crackers.”
“Is that it or is there another cart coming?”
“Please try to eat something.”
“I’m not going to win this am I?”
I shook my head.
“Fine. I’ll start with the sunflower toast. Then, maybe I’ll have some chicken soup.”
I put a couple of triangles of toast on her plate and placed it on her lap.
“You know tomorrow’s going to be great, right?” I put my hand on her knee and squeezed. She smiled at me but it didn’t light up her face the way her smiles usually did. “What’s up, Princess?”
“I just feel like I’m ruining our last night together.”
“You haven’t ruined anything and technically our last night together ended three hours ago. You were in my arms and we were asleep, just the way I wanted it.” I reached out and stroked her soft cheek.
“This would be so much easier if you weren’t so nice.”
“Maybe if you got to know me, you wouldn’t feel that way.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” She reached out and scratched my beard.
I took her wrist and kissed her palm. “Eat.” She eyed me for a moment then finally took a bite of her toast. I rubbed her shin over the blanket. “Movie?”
“Okay. You pick.”
“You’re going to love this one. It’s about a guy who’s a big rig truck driver and professional arm wrestler. He has to win a big tournament in Vegas so he can have enough money to get custody of his son from his rich asshole father-in-law because his wife is dying of cancer.”
“There is no way that’s the plot of a real movie.”
“Sylvester Stallone plays the dad.”
“I’m in.”
Kimberly was still fast asleep in my arms when I woke up. A lock of glossy chestnut hair had escaped from her scarf and I tucked it back in with a sweep of my finger. At some point between the time I woke up yesterday with her in my arms on that couch and the time we fell asleep watching Sly win the championship, I had fallen in completely love with Kimberly. Was it making love to her, the way she saved our presentation or the way my heart swelled when she unlocked the door to that dark bathroom? It could have been the way her eyes lit up when she saw my model or hearing her giggle as I twirled her around the conference room. Whatever it was, my heart, despite my brain’s many warnings, decided exactly what it wanted. It wanted Kimberly, but she was leaving in less than twelve hours.
“Hey,” I whispered to no response. “I’ve never said this to anyone before, which is probably why I’m saying it while you’re asleep, but this week with you has changed me in ways I didn’t think were possible. For the first time in my life I’ve been thinking about my future, maybe one with wedding rings and babies that look like wrinkled potatoes. And I see them with you because…” I took a deep breath and continued in a lower whisper, “I’m pretty sure I’m falling in love with you. And I know I should wake you up and tell you this, but I also know this isn’t what you want. It’s not what I wanted either, but it happened. And you know that restraint is not my thing, so…if I didn’t say this out loud, I’d probably explode. So, there it is.”
Kimberly’s alarm went off at eight. I wrapped my arms around her and squeezed before she had a chance to leave the bed.
“Good morning, Princess. How are you feeling?”
“Good actually,” she said in her sexy sleepy whisper that I was already missing. “Thank you for earlier.”
“Thank you for yesterday.”
“Which part of yesterday?”
“All of it. It might have been the best day of my life.”
“Stop.” She laughed. She thought I was kidding but I was serious.
“What time do we have to be at Wolfe?”
“Eleven-thirty. I got us the slot right before lunch.”
“Sweet.”
“I know. They’re doing all the meetings today because of the storm. This slot is perfect because, it’s not going to run over time and hopefully they’ll be talking about your design during the break. I’ll have to cut my PowerPoint presentation, though…” Her adorable mouth twisted in disappointment.
“And, we have a few hours before we have to leave this apartment.” I raised a mischievous eyebrow at her.
Her face brightened. “You have a problem. You might be an addict.” She reached into the night table drawer grinning.
“Two days. Naked. Every surface.” I put the plastic wrapper between my teeth and ripped.
When I could finally tear myself away from her, I jumped in the shower, lathered up my face and shaved in the mirror. I was having trouble wrapping my head around the fact that she was really leaving so I decided to focus on the meeting. It had to go perfectly. I wanted to win, but more than I usually did. My caveman wanted to make Kimberly proud.
I went to the closet to grab my suit and was surprised to find that Kimberly had sent it out to be pressed. It was hanging in one of The Sterling’s garment bags and not in the dry cleaner’s plastic sheeting I had brought from New York. She’d even had my shoes shined. What kind of a jackass lets a woman like her get on a plane and disappear from his life? I was going to find out in eight hours.
I made a cup of tea with some toast and went to her room to give it to her. Kimberly was in her bathroom putting the finishing touches on her makeup and, fuck, she looked good. She was wearing a short-sleeve, belted yellow dress that was clearly tailored to fit her. It wasn’t skin tight but it hugged her curves. Her hair flowed down her back in waves like it did on the plane. I was so used to seeing her bare faced with her hair up in braids, buns and ponytails, dressed in pajamas, yoga pants and t-shirts that I was a little taken aback. Kimberly’s corporate alter-ego was sexy but intimidating.
Stepping behind her, I crept one arm around her waist, used the other to pull her hair to the side and planted a kiss on my favorite spot. She smiled at me before her eyes went wide and she whipped around to face me.
“It’s all gone.” She was a running hand over my bare cheek. I grinned down at her. “Did you always have these?” She was running her fingertips over my dimples.
“As long as I can remember.”
“They’re very cute.” She kissed me. She was wearing four-inch heels so we were almost eye to eye.
I hugged her and we gazed at our reflection in the bathroom mirror.
“We look really good together,” I whispered.
“We do clean up nicely, don’t we?” She laughed. “We look like
the couple that comes with the picture frame.”
“Should we take a selfie?” I pulled my phone out of my pocket. We pressed our faces together and smiled.
“Now a silly one,” she said. She stuck out her tongue and I crossed my eyes. “Send me those.”
“You’d have to give me your phone number first.”
“We still haven’t done that?” She snatched my phone and sent herself the photos. “There. You have successfully gotten my number.”
“And it only took a week.”
“Was it worth the wait?” She turned to face me, and I was hypnotized by those chestnut brown eyes again.
“Every fucking second.” I pressed our lips together. I smoothed my hands down the fabric of her dress and started to tug the skirt up her longs legs. She put her hands over mine to stop me. “It’s fine, Princess. We have plenty of time.”
“No, it’s not that.” Her lips grazed mine as she spoke. “You’re going to wrinkle my dress. The zipper is in the back.” She pulled her hair to the side and turned around to face the mirror again. The zipper pull slid down her back between my fingers and I pulled the dress down over her shoulders revealing a matching black lace bra and panties. I didn’t think it was possible for my dick to get harder than it was a second ago, but it did. I pressed my lips onto her shoulder as she stepped out of her dress so I could hang it on the door.
“Keep the heels on.”
I was out of my pants and into a condom in seconds. I peeled her out of her panties and clutched them in my fist as I positioned one of her knees on the bathroom sink.
I entered her from behind and she felt like home. Kimberly pressed her delicate palms on the bathroom mirror, closed her eyes and elicited those familiar, soft moans that drove me crazy. I looked at our reflection and thought about how much she looked like the Kimberly Simmons I first laid eyes on as she passed me on that flight. I imagined having her like this then, but I was only attracted to that Kimberly Simmons—drawn to her and curious about her. The woman I held in my arms was brilliant, funny, generous, strong, kind and so many other things I was discovering every moment I spent with her.