Keeping Secrets & Telling Lies

by Trice Hickman

  Victoria looked at Denise with questioning eyes. She knew that her friend had never liked Parker, and once he showed his ass by getting caught cheating in the act, Denise had been through. “I know you have an opinion, so give it to me,” she said.

  Denise crossed her plump thighs and leaned back in her chair. “Well, you avoided him like the plague when you saw him last Saturday, and you could barely look him in the eye when you saw him again today. I think that says it all.”

  “Yeah, that I can’t stand to be in the same room with him.”

  Denise rolled her eyes. “Please don’t front.You know who you’re talkin’ to, don’t you?”

  Victoria looked away. Her hidden desires were finally bubbling to the surface. She let out a slow sigh. “Denise, this isn’t good. I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

  “Girlfriend, you act like you screwed the man.”

  Victoria flinched, because in her mind she already had.

  “I agree with the advice that you said Tyler gave you,” Denise continued. “You need to let Ted know about Parker. It already looks suspicious that you haven’t told him before now.”

  “Yes, I know. I just have to find the right time.”

  “Girlfriend, the time ain’t gonna get no righter than the present.”

  Victoria knew that just like Tyler, Denise was on the money. She knew that she couldn’t continue to avoid the issue, because the longer she waited, the more difficult it would be to explain to Ted why she hadn’t mentioned running into Parker right away. Plus, she was drowning in the thoughts that had been dancing through her mind about the man she’d once loved. She hoped she would be able to keep those emotions in check while she delivered the news to Ted. “I feel so out of sorts,” she finally said.

  “About what? Nothing has happened ... at least not yet,” Denise responded, taking a small sip of her coffee as she eyed Victoria.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “You know exactly what it means.”

  “No, no, no. I have a wonderful husband.”

  “Who’s arguing that? Me, you, and everybody else knows that Ted’s a rare gem. He’s a genuinely good man. And that’s hard to find, just like my Vernon,” Denise said about her husband of over twenty years. “What I’m talking about is the reality of your situation. People slip all the time.”

  Victoria shook her head. “I would never cheat on Ted.”

  Denise was quiet for a second, carefully measuring her next words. “Just make sure you’re being honest with yourself. Don’t try to pretend that things are one way when you know they really aren’t ... ’cause that’s when you can get caught in your own web.”

  The two sat in silence for a moment. Victoria hated that Denise had made that statement, but more important, she hated that it was true.

  Honey,What’s Up? ...

  Later that afternoon,Victoria sat at her desk, polishing off the last truffle in her box of Godiva chocolates. She looked at Parker’s business card. PARKER E. BRIGHTWOOD,M.D., EMORY UNIVERSITY HOSPITAL, CHIEF OF CARDIOTHORACIC SURGERY, his title read. She smiled to herself, knowing this was what Parker had always wanted to achieve. He was ambitious, yet another quality she had admired about him.When they dated, Parker had been just as driven about his career as she’d been about her own. It was one of the many reasons why she thought they’d end up together.

  She twiddled the card between her fingers and noticed that he’d written his home and cell phone numbers on the back. A quick rush went through her body. It was the same charge she’d felt when they were standing in the hallway at the school. She was temporarily drawn from her thoughts at the sound of Denise’s voice.

  “Okay, girlfriend, I’m heading home.”

  Victoria slipped the business card back into her handbag. “Enjoy your evening, and, Denise, I’m sorry again about today. I really am glad you’re back.”

  “I’m glad to be back, too.” Denise winked before waving good-bye.

  As Victoria sat alone, surrounded by the quiet of her office, she thought about the immediate dilemma in front of her. She didn’t know how to break the news to Ted that not only was Parker’s son in Jack and Jill with Alexandria, but that he’d also be attending the same elementary school this fall. “With my luck, PJ will end up in Alexandria’s class,” she whispered aloud.

  She knew that any kind of contact in close proximity to Parker would lead only to the worst kind of trouble. “Regardless of the consequences, I have to tell Ted,” she whispered to herself. She realized that it would eventually come out, anyway, so she might as well come clean with the truth. She decided she’d tell him right away, as soon as he walked through the door that evening.

  After another half hour of e-mails and paperwork,Victoria prepared to leave the office and pick up Alexandria from summer camp. She was about to log off her computer when her BlackBerry rang. She looked at the caller ID and saw that it was Ted. “Hey, honey.What’s up?”

  He took a deep breath before delivering his bad news.

  Ted had gotten a devastating call from his sister just an hour before. She’d told him that their mother was in the hospital, and that her condition was so grave, the doctors advised that he leave for Boston within the next twenty-four hours.

  Victoria knew that her mother-in-law’s health had been on the decline for quite some time, but she’d kept the entire family in the dark about the particulars of her condition.

  Carolyn Thornton’s secrecy about things was something that had always bothered Victoria. The woman was about as open as a pine coffin, and it was a trait she’d passed along to her son. Ted kept information close to the vest, and at times, Victoria had to ask him what was going on with work and other projects, because he rarely spoke of things that didn’t involve their immediate family.

  Initially, she thought it was great that Ted didn’t bring up ViaTech or his other business ventures after he left the office and entered their front door, but over the years she’d grown to want to know more about the various happenings in his life outside of their home. She wanted to feel connected to him in every way, but it was like pulling teeth. She’d tried over and over to get him to share other parts of himself, but he was hesitant to give her more than cursory information. And even when she was able to get small bits from him, she felt as if he gave her just enough to keep her curiosity at bay, but not enough to keep her fully dialed in.

  “Oh, honey, is there anything I can do?” Victoria asked.

  “No. According to my sister, it’s pretty much a watch-and-wait situation. I need to fly out first thing tomorrow morning. I’ll be home in an hour, and I’ll fill you in on the details when I get there.”

  Anyone else’s ear would have never been able to detect a thing in Ted’s voice other than the power of his commanding tone. But Victoria knew her husband, and she could hear the shift. “Okay, I’ll see you at home. I love you,” she said before hanging up the phone. She walked out the door, her mind heavy with worry.

  After dealing with Parker that morning and hearing Ted’s terrible news about his mother that afternoon,Victoria began to feel the weight of her long, stressful day. But her dismal mood was instantly erased when she walked into Alexandria’s classroom and saw her daughter’s smiling face.

  “Hi, Mommy!” Alexandria yelled out. “Look what I made.” She grinned and ran up to Victoria, handing her a brightly colored sheet of paper.

  Victoria looked at the picture that her daughter had drawn. It wasn’t a rendition of the stick figures that Alexandria normally drew. She’d crafted lifelike images of a father, mother, and child. There was even a dog to complete the happy family.

  “See, Mommy,” she said, smiling. “That’s Daddy and you and me and our dog!”

  “Sweetie, we don’t have a dog.”

  “I know, but can we get one? Please?”

  Victoria didn’t want a dog, and thankfully, Ted had been in agreement about not having any pets. Not even goldfish. But apparently, Alexandria had her
mind set on adding another member to their family.

  “Please, Mommy! PJ has a dog, and I want one, too!”

  Victoria blinked her eyes. Damn! “We’ll talk about it later, okay?” she said, helping Alexandria gather her things. She tried to remain calm, but right then and there she knew that Parker Brightwood was going to be a serious issue, no matter how she couched it to Ted.

  Alexandria was disappointed but didn’t drop her smile. “Okay. Can I get a Happy Meal?”

  As Victoria pulled away from the McDonald’s drive-thru window, she listened while Alexandria recapped her fun-filled day at camp, going on and on with the exuberance of someone who didn’t have a worry in the world. Her daughter’s bright spirit was the light she needed, because she knew there were going to be rough patches ahead.

  Face the Grim Situation....

  Ted’s afternoon had gone from bad to worse in the span of just a few short minutes. His meeting with the accounting department had been laborious, and his teleconference with the remote location supply-chain directors and managers that followed hadn’t been any better. But little did he know that those meetings would prove to be the highlight of his workday after hearing from his sister.

  Even though all he wanted to do was grieve after learning the news about his mother’s condition, he knew there was no time for that, at least not at the moment. He picked up the phone and instructed his assistant, Jen, to make arrangements for an early morning flight to Boston. After that task was handled, he dialed Victoria to let her know about his mother’s fatal condition. It gave him comfort when he heard the care and concern in his wife’s voice, and even though Victoria and his mother had never been close, he was thankful for the fact that they’d always been civil toward each other.

  After he finished his laundry list of phone calls and sent out a few e-mails,Ted walked over to the minibar on the other side of his large corner office. He was about to break one of his long-standing rules: drinking alcohol during business hours. He poured himself a gin and tonic, then walked back over to his desk and sank into his leather chair. He swished two ice cubes around in his mouth, letting the cold liquid drizzle down the back of his throat. The drink felt good and served as a temporary elixir from the news his sister, Lilly, had just delivered.

  He’d learned that his mother was in the hospital, and from what Lilly had told him, she wasn’t going to make it out. Ted knew that his mother had been feeling poorly for several months, but each time they’d spoken, she avoided giving him a straight answer about the full extent of her health. He had suspected that it was worse than she let on, but he also knew how private his mother was, so he’d resisted the urge to push her.

  Carolyn Thornton had always been secretive with information about herself, and anyone else, for that matter. She never gossiped, an astonishing feat for a woman of her age and social status. Carolyn was tight lipped about nearly every aspect of her life. It was an inherited trait that Ted had observed as a child and later perfected as an adult, when his first marriage fell into tiny pieces.

  It had been over a decade since his father passed away, and in those first few years Ted had watched his mother’s health slip little by little with each changing season. But when Alexandria was born, she seemed to undergo a rebirth. It was as though her youngest grandchild had given her a new reason for living. She’d oohed and aahed over her son’s firstborn child. She’d said that she saw a lot of herself in Alexandria, although all Ted could see was Victoria through and through. When he looked at Alexandria’s prominent features and thick mass of curly black hair, it was plain to see that she looked every bit like her mother. The only biological footprint of the Thornton clan that Ted had left on his child was the light, cream-colored tint of her skin.

  Ted loosened his tie as he finished the last of his drink. Finally, he rose from his desk, preparing to leave his office. Normally, he loved going home at the end of the day, because he found comfort behind the stately brick walls. Victoria had made their house a home in every sense, providing love and nurturing care. Knowing that she and Alexandria were there waiting for him always made it easy for him to leave ViaTech and all his business troubles at the front door. His home was the one place where he found peace of mind. But this evening was different, and he wished he could linger at his desk.

  As he looked out the window overlooking the city’s skyline, he suddenly understood what Victoria meant about finding comfort in being at her office. In the early days of their marriage it had bothered him that she sought solace by going there, rather than by walking through the doors of their home, as he did. “Ted, this has nothing to do with you or Alexandria. It’s about me, and my time,” she’d often said.

  Now Ted had the same feeling and understood perfectly. But he knew he had to leave and face the grim situation head-on.

  He thought about Alexandria and how his mother’s death would affect her. He’d never known any of his mother’s relatives, but he’d been fortunate enough to have his father’s parents in his life until they passed away when he was in his early teens. And he’d been blessed to grow up surrounded by the large Thornton clan, with tons of uncles, aunts, and cousins. He knew that Alexandria was too young to understand that her granny Carolyn wouldn’t be around much longer, and he dreaded having to explain it to her once he got home. He sighed heavily, thinking about the fact that his little girl had to deal with race and mortality all in the same week.

  The Last Ounce of Comfort ...

  After Victoria cleared the table of her salad and Alexandria’s chicken nuggets, she looked up to find Ted coming through the back door.

  “Hi, Daddy! Look, look!” Alexandria said, jumping out of her chair. She ran up to the refrigerator, where her picture hung, affixed to the stainless steel door by a Dora the Explorer magnet.

  Ted walked over to inspect his daughter’s artwork as he removed his suit jacket. “Wow, princess. That’s a very nice picture.”

  “See our dog, Daddy.” Alexandria smiled, pointing out the animal in the picture. She lowered her voice as she looked up at him. “We’re gonna get a dog real soon.”

  Ted looked at Victoria as if to ask a question.

  “Sweetie, I told you that’s something we’ll have to talk about later,” Victoria corrected.

  Alexandria looked from her mother to her father. “But I want a dog,” she whined almost to herself as she tugged at one of her long ponytails.

  Ted looked down at his daughter. “Listen to your mother,” he said, winking in Victoria’s direction. “This is something we’ll have to discuss later.”

  Alexandria nodded her head.

  “Sweetie, why don’t you go upstairs, pick out a book for bedtime, and get ready for your bath. I’ll be up in a few minutes.” After Victoria was sure that Alexandria was in her room, rummaging through her books and toys, she turned to Ted. She could see the stress clouding his face as she wrapped her arms around him for a gentle hug. “What exactly did your sister say?”

  Ted let out a deep breath. “My mother has inoperable cancer. It’s her pancreas. Lilly said she’s been receiving chemo for months.”

  Victoria was shocked. “Oh, my Lord. I can’t believe your mother never told anyone.”

  Ted shook his head. “Not a soul. She’s been in the hospital for nearly a week, but Lilly just found out this afternoon, when she got a call from Mother’s doctor. That’s when she called Charlie and me. They’re both at the hospital now. The doctor says she has forty-eight hours ... maybe. She’s been fading in and out of consciousness, but she asked for me specifically, so I’m leaving first thing in the morning. This is my last chance to see my mother.”

  Victoria hugged her husband even tighter. “Oh, Ted, do you want me to go with you?”

  “No. There’s really nothing anyone can do at this point. Besides, you have Gigi’s wedding this weekend, plus Debbie’s coming to town tomorrow, and I know you want to spend time with her.” He paused, already feeling a sense of incredible loss. “By the end of th
e weekend, my mother will probably be ...” Ted swallowed hard, not wanting to finish his sentence. “I’ll get Jen to make arrangements for you and Alexandria to fly out once the burial plans are finalized.”

  The devastating news was too much for Victoria to process. Despite the fact that she and her mother-in-law had never enjoyed a particularly close relationship, she felt a sentimental longing that she couldn’t explain. And seeing Ted in so much pain made her heart ache right alongside his.

  “Are you sure you don’t want me to go with you? I can call Susan. I know she won’t mind letting Alexandria stay with them for a few days. Honestly, Gigi’s wedding is nothing compared to what you’re about to go through. Denise can run things for me, and Debbie will certainly understand,” Victoria said, touching Ted’s face with the palm of her hand.

  “No, you should stay here and keep things as normal as possible for Alexandria. I need this time alone to say my good-byes.”

  “We need to prepare her,” Victoria said, darting her eyes up toward the ceiling above where they were standing.

  Ted sighed. “I know.” It was a task he didn’t feel up to taking on, but he knew it needed to be done. Long ago he and Victoria had decided that they wouldn’t sugarcoat life for their daughter, and that they’d raise her to be a strong young woman so she’d be prepared to deal with anything that life bounced her way.

  Later that night, after Ted and Victoria explained to Alexandria that her granny Carolyn would soon be at eternal rest, Ted packed his suitcase in preparation for his early morning flight. He was filled with anxiety and dread. He wanted to get to his mother’s side as quickly as he could, but he felt nearly crippled knowing it would be their last visit.

  When he spoke to his sister to get an update before heading to bed, she told him that their mother was still hanging on, vowing not to breathe her last breath until he got there. An eerie numbness overcame him. He couldn’t put his finger on the feeling, but it was something that went beyond mortality, and it unsettled him to his core.