by Connie Mason
Meg thought about it a moment and decided that if she could believe any man it would be Jess. If only he wasn't such a ass about her and Zach. She didn't believe Jess would knowingly hurt her but he was a man. Arlo had been full of promises, too, but he'd hurt her terribly and would have continued to do so if she hadn't had the gumption to do something about it.
"I believe you wouldn't knowingly hurt me, Jess, but that doesn't change things."
"Are you denying you want me? Or are you worried about betraying Zach?"
Meg flushed and looked away. Never had she experienced the kind of unfulfilled longing that Jess's kisses roused in her. She'd had so little experience with men that those feelings frightened her.
"I'm not sure what I want, Jess. And for your information, since Zach and I aren't lovers, I wouldn't be betraying him."
Apparently Jess perceived her answer as permission to proceed, for he swept her off her feet and into his arms.
Her voice rose on a note of panic. "What are you doing?"
"Taking you someplace where we can both have what we want. You're contrary as all get out, Meg, but that only makes you more desirable in my eyes."
He strode to her room and shoved open the door with his shoulder. Then he let her slide slowly down his body. She felt his arousal and fear shuddered through her. She couldn't let him do this.
He kissed her again, and Meg's wits flew out the window. A moment later her foggy brain registered a new feeling, one that made the breath catch in her throat. His hands, his large capable hands, were everywhere, touching, caressing, arousing. When he cupped her between her legs, panic rose thick and hard inside her, and she pushed against his chest.
"Stop! This is going too fast. I'm not sure this is..."
Jess's hands fell to his sides. "You're right. I'm too damn eager and I should know better. We'll do this your way, love. Slow and easy."
"That's not what I mean."
"I know what you mean," he said as he tangled his hand in her hair, easing her head back.
Meg shuddered as he kissed the tender flesh beneath her ear, the wildly thudding pulse at the base of her throat. She murmured something incoherent and clung to him. He found her breasts, kneading them gently through the material of her bodice. Her fingers dug into his shoulders and she stifled a moan.
He plucked impatiently at the offending garment. "This will have to go."
He released the buttons holding the bodice together and stripped it down her arms, taking her chemise with it. Meg's hands flew up to shield her breasts. Jess pulled them down to her sides.
She held her breath as he studied the puckered scar above her right breast, touching it gently with his fingertip. Was it so ugly?
"The scar detracts nothing from your breasts. This isn't the first time I've seen them, you know. They're beautiful. I couldn't tell you that as a doctor, but as a man, I can say all the things I've been thinking since the first time I undressed you.
"Your body is perfect. Strong, athletic, yet soft and feminine and alluring." He rubbed her nipples with his thumbs. "I want to touch you all over."
Meg stared into the torrid depths of his glittering eyes and felt her heart pounding violently against her chest. She wanted him. The unexpected truth came to her in a blinding flash when she looked into his eyes and recognized hunger, the same kind of hunger she was experiencing.
How could it be? Hunger was the last thing she wanted to feel for a man. She feared the ravening desire Jess had roused in her. Feared what Jess would do to her. She'd thought Arlo was s kind man until her wedding night, when he'd torn into her like a rapacious beast, laughing at her pitiful cries of pain.
He'd told her she should get use to it, for he intended to use her youth and innocence to help him step up in the world, stressing that not all men were gentle lovers like himself. She'd nearly laughed in his face. She thought he'd merely been trying to frighten her into submission, until he offered her as collateral in a poker game, her innocence had been shattered for all time.
Her thoughts were still focused inward when she suddenly became aware that Jess had pushed her dress and chemise down past her hips, taking her drawers with them. They fell in a puddle around her feet and he lifted her out of them. His face was stark with need, his muscles tense as he tumbled her onto the bed and stared down at her. Meg's first inclination was to pull the covers over her nakedness, but the look on Jess's face told her it would do her no good. He was determined to have her.
His gaze held her suspended as he slowly began to undress. She wanted to look away but was unable to move or direct her gaze elsewhere. His shirt hit the floor. She stared at his chest and shoulders. Rippling tendons and long muscles jerked in response to her intense perusal. Meg thought him magnificent and she hadn't even seen all of him.
When Jess whipped off his belt and opened his trousers, Meg's fear returned. A small cry of alarm slipped past her lips when she saw his eyelids drift half closed, concealing the intense gleam of his eyes. Her heartbeat skittered. With fear? Anticipation? Probably a mixture of both. Could he tell how frightened she was?
Jess's trousers and drawers dropped to the floor and he stepped out of them. Meg tried not to stare, but it was impossible not to. It was full daylight; sunshine streamed through the window. Every impressive detail of Jess's hard body was blatantly displayed. Not an ounce of fat resided anywhere on his magnificent form. Her gaze flitted down his broad chest, over a washboard stomach, slim hips, and musclular legs, then returned again to that rigid muscle standing upright between his thighs.
He was huge. His fully aroused sex rose regally against his stomach, its purple head moist and throbbing. Meg gulped back a scream. To a woman who'd only known pain from her brief sexual encounters, it was an alarming sight.
Jess was thoroughly puzzled by Meg's apparent fright. Did she think he would hurt her? He couldn't imagine Zach engaging in rough sex, but nothing was impossible. He eased down on the bed beside Meg and took her into his arms.
"Fear has no place in this bed, love. I promised you pleasure and you shall have it."
"Pleasure? Is that possible?"
Meg's question startled Jess. "You've never experienced pleasure from lovemaking with...anyone?"
Meg shook her head. "I don't believe it exists. Please, Jess, can't you see this is a mistake?"
A thought suddenly occurred to Jess. What if Meg had been telling the truth about Zach. Maybe they weren't lovers.
"Are you a virgin, Meg?"
Meg looked unflinchingly into his eyes and shook her head. "I'm not a virgin."
A sense of disappointment tugged at Jess. He'd been willing to give her the benefit of the doubt about Zach, but her words had dashed even that remote possibility from his mind. How many others had there been before Zach? Why hadn't any of her previous lovers given her pleasure?
Jess eased down on the bed beside her. "I'm going to give you pleasure, Meg, never doubt it. Forget your other lovers, they don't count. Concentrate on me. I'm going to make your body sing."
He bracketed her face in his hands and took her mouth. When his tongue filled her mouth she forget her fear. Blood pounded through her veins so hard she imagined she could hear it. He brought her beneath him, trapping her. Then he gave her his passion, his fire, the sweet memorable taste of him.
It was frightening. It was heady and intoxicating.
She squirmed beneath him, and heard him groan. The sound returned her scattered wits and she pushed against his chest.
"I don't want this, Jess."
"We both want this," Jess panted into her ear. "Don't worry about Zach, he's probably enjoying himself with his lady friend."
He filled his hands with her breasts, kneading their fullness, teasing her nipples with his long, talented fingers. His weight shifted and his hand slipped down between their bodies, his fingers finding a sensitive spot that caused her to jerk in response. Her head fell back, and a soft mewling sound tore from her throat.
Jess raised u
p on his elbow and smiled down at her. "See, I told you there'd be pleasure."
Before she could draw a calming breath he molded his mouth to hers, forcing her lips open in a raw, violent invasion of his tongue. She felt his finger pierce her from below, then move in imitation of his tongue. She felt overwhelmed, possessed. She could think of nothing except the moist heat of his mouth and the wicked pressure of his finger.
Then his mouth left hers with an abruptness that startled her. Her entire body felt shaken, her lips swollen and bruised. Her blood rushed through her veins, pounding against her temples and that place where Jess's finger tantalized her. Was this passion? Or was it simple pleasure making her body melt into a boneless lump? Was there a difference?
She splayed her hands against his chest, trying to put some distance between them so she could think.
Jess must have read her mind. "No, love, don't think. Just feel. Experience all the wonderful emotions and feelings; let your body respond. Lovemaking can be powerfully rewarding, if you let it."
"It can also be painful and degrading," Meg whispered shakily.
"Not with me."
Meg wanted to believe him. More than anything she wanted to forget the painful coupling Arlo had forced on her. She wanted beautiful dreams to fill her nights instead of the frightening ones that usually plagued her. Could Jess's lovemaking be the miracle she'd been praying for? Until Jess she'd never encountered a man with whom she wanted to explore her sensual nature, if indeed she had one.
"Stop thinking, Meg," Jess chided, as if aware of her thoughts.
His pressed his finger deeper inside her. She gasped and arched against him. "You don't play fair."
A chuckle rumbled in his chest. "Neither do you. Why do you pretend you're not enjoying what I'm doing to you? Your face is flushed with excitement and your body is taut as a bowstring. You're hot and damp and slick as sweet cream. I'll bet you taste delicious."
His words appalled Meg. But what he did next left her gasping with shock. His took her with his mouth. At first she hadn't known what he intended as his mouth slid downward, between her breasts, over her quivering stomach, lower, to where his fingers were producing all those wonderful sensations.
Her head tilted back. A soundless cry vibrated in her throat. Tension pulled her legs rigid. She nearly jumped off the bed as a trembling ecstasy built inside her. Then the rough pad of his tongue moved over her, inside her, soothing the slick, swollen flesh that suddenly felt feverish and taut.
Meg buried her face in the pillow to stifle the moans of pleasure building in her throat. She'd never known sensations she was experiencing were possible, much less existed.
Fiery ripples began deep in her belly, at the very center of her being, and spread in ever widening waves until they consumed her utterly. Her body stiffened, held captive in an exquisite state of violent emotional upheaval. Then everything seemed to culminate in a blinding flash of raw sensation. Then she melted.
"Now it's my turn," Jess said, raising himself above her. "I need to be inside you."
Slowly he sank down on her body. He kissed her open mouth, exulting in her soft panting breaths. He moved his arm beneath her, lifting her buttocks toward him as he penetrating her with a single deep thrust. He heard her cry out but was too far gone in lust to give meaning to it. There was no maidenhead to impede him, but she was so damn tight she might as well have been untouched. She surrounded him so snugly he could feel vibrations when she took a deep breath.
He nearly lost it when she moved her body to better accommodate him. "Don't move," he said through clenched teeth.
She inhaled slowly. A curse ripped from Jess's throat. "Damn! It's too late."
After a fractured moment he began to move. He sank into her and felt her quiver. He withdrew and sank into her again, savoring the slick, scalding heat of her. He held her steady and planted himself as far as he could go, nudging her legs wider.
"You're so damn tight," he groaned into her ear. "Like a velvet glove made just for me."
Jess felt as if he had never possessed a woman as completely as he now possessed Meg. All the women who had gone before her were nothing. The intense pleasure searing his mind and body was centered on the female beneath him, on his possession of her, on the slick heat of her tight sheath. Suddenly he was desperate, frenzied, like a volcano about to explode. Tucking her buttocks more firmly against his hips, he moved forcefully inside her, thrusting deeply, powerfully.
"I can't wait, love. Hurry," he grated hoarsely against her lips. "Come with me."
Meg lifted her hips to meet his strokes, stunned by the powerful sensations racing rampant through her. Pleasure, relentless, fervent, held her in its grip. She was close to frantic now, and then he released her in one powerful stroke that sent her soaring to oblivion. On the edge of her awareness she heard Jess cry out her name, felt him collapse against her.
Long moments later Meg opened her eyes and looked up into Jess's glittering gaze. A look of confusion wrinkled his brow.
"What is it?" Meg asked.
He pulled out of her and rolled over on his back. "You're a puzzle, Meg Lincoln. "I can't quite figure you out."
"What do you mean?"
Jess turned on his side and raised up on one elbow. He lifted his hand to idly draw a finger down her throat to the swell of her breast, then over her belly.
"When I first started making love to you, you acted like a scared rabbit. As if you feared I would hurt you. Why is that, Meg? Who was the brutal lover in your life. Is it Zach?"
"No!" Meg denied hotly.
Jess's voice hardened. "Keep Zach out of your bed from no on. Maybe what you feel for Zach isn't love. Could it be pity?"
"Zach wouldn't stand for my pity," Meg scoffed.
Jess's finger paused in the soft thatch between her legs. "What now, Meg? Where do we go from here?"
"What we did just now changes nothing."
Jess went still. "It changes everything. I don't want you living here with Zach any longer."
Meg surged upright, her expression fierce. "You have no right to tell me what to do. This is my home. Zach needs me. He's not a well man."
"He looked fine to me today."
"Zach finally admitted to me that he has a bad heart. The medicine you gave him helps but we both know his condition will worsen."
Jess didn't know why he was making demands on Meg when he had no right to demand anything of her. He was a wanted man. The law could catch up to him today, tomorrow, or never. He could offer her nothing except an uncertain future. Meg was a bounty hunter, how could he expect her to feel anything for him but revulsion when she learned he was a wanted man?
"I can rent a room for you at the boarding house," Jess offered. "I'm making enough money to pay for your keep."
"What will I be, your whore? The townspeople already hold me in contempt for choosing a profession not suited to my sex. No thanks, I'll stay here where I belong."
"Dammit, Meg, my life is complicated right now. I can't give you anything beyond what I just offered. I want us to be together. I don't want you to stay here with Zach."
"If you think I want an offer of marriage from you, you're dead wrong," Meg said stiffly. Marriage is not in my future. I'm perfectly happy the way I am, with what I'm doing."
Jess arose abruptly and began pulling on his clothing. "Does placing your life in danger make you happy?"
Meg nodded emphatically. "Why not? It pays well and puts food on the table."
Jess buttoned his shirt and slammed on his hat. "I won't have it, Meg. You're not going chasing after criminals again and that's all final."
Meg's chin notched upward. "You and who else is going to stop me?"
"I'll have another talk with Zach. If your lover can't stop you, I will."
Meg reared up out of bed, apparently unconcerned about her nudity as she faced Jess squarely, hands on hips, jaw jutting pugnaciously.
"Zach is the father I wanted all my life but never had until he found
me half dead on the prairie and nursed me back to health. He was a rough, hard living bounty hunter when we first met, but he showed me a softness no one else had ever seen. I became the daughter he lost years ago. When he took the bullet that ended his career, I decided to become what he had been. I owe him my life."
Perhaps for the first time, Jess honesty considered what Meg had been telling him for weeks. Could it be true? Her explanation seemed logical enough but the fact remained that Meg hadn't been a virgin.
"You weren't a virgin," Jess reminded her. "Who was the man in your life if not Zach?" His eyes narrowed. "Or were there more than one? Why were you slonr on the prairie? What happened to you?"
"My past is my own business," Meg defended. "You have no right to judge me."
"I wasn't judging you. I'm merely curious. Lord knows I'm no saint."
"Maybe someday I'll tell you, after you tell me your secret. Are you wanted by the law, Jess?"
Jess's gaze settled on her breasts and he felt himself grow hard and thicken. He directed his gaze elsewhere so he could think. Making love to Meg had definitely complicated matters. What was he going to do about her? Should he tell her about himself?
Meg had finally convinced him that her relationship with Zach was purely platonic, but what about his own feelings for Meg?
Jess hadn't had a woman in a very long time, and he didn't want to confuse lust with deeper emotions until he'd had time to sort them out. Especially since he wasn't presently free to nurture emotional ties. Besides being wanted by the law, he carried an abundance of guilt for not accepting responsibility for Delia Wingate's pregnancy.
"Jess, are you gong to answer my question?"
"I have no secrets," Jess lied. "None that I care to divulge."
Meg yanked the sheet from the bed and pulled it around her. "You'd better leave, Jess. Please don't come back. A relationship between us will only complicate matters. I don't want marriage and neither do you. Satisfy yourself with whores, for I'm not about to become one. My life is here with Zach."
"Promise me one thing."
"I know what you're going to ask and the answer is no."