The Tied Man

by McGowan, Tabitha

  My track pants and sweater were folded neatly in the corner; I wouldn’t risk stepping out of the bathroom until I was fully dressed and ready for any eventuality. I hadn’t seen Coyle since our encounter in the kitchen nine days previously and I was more than happy to maintain the distance between us.

  I hadn’t had any real contact with anyone since that morning. Blaine still felt that I was still unworthy of her presence, and Henry simply placed a beautifully arranged tray of food outside my bedroom or the studio and ran before he had to make eye contact with me, leaving only self-loathing in his wake.

  And Finn... Picking at the remains of the stitches in my forehead caused less discomfort than thinking of him. Everywhere I looked, I saw him. Even in his absence he filled every corner of my shrunken world: when I ran I saw him in the gardens; he sat hunched and surly at the kitchen table if I called there to make myself a coffee; he curled into the chair in my studio as I began to add the last details of Blaine’s portrait.

  And when I lay in bed I could still feel his arms holding me close.

  No matter how much I reminded myself that my obeying the rules was the only thing that kept him alive, it didn’t alter the fact that it had been nine long days since I had last seen Finn, and I missed him like a lost limb.

  Finn

  I attempted to set my coffee cup down in one of the two saucers that I could see in front of me, and managed to clip the real one so that the porcelain cracked and the spoon clattered to the floor. ‘Shit. Sorry,’ I mumbled.

  They all must have known I was absolutely loaded, but whatever the hell was going on, my ability to appear human didn’t seem to be essential to my clients’ needs. Chester continued to beam at me like he’d just picked me up at his high school prize giving, and Ellis hadn’t taken his eyes off me all night; the naked greed in his expression told me loud and clear that he wasn’t going to settle for a straight fuck and a kiss goodnight.

  It started with a simple ‘Um,’ from Chester as he helped himself to a brandy. Ellis placed his mineral water down in the centre of his place setting, and it was obvious that the pair of them were building up to some big proclamation or other.

  ‘The detail we were discussing – I take it that it’s still okay?’ Chester asked.

  ‘Of course,’ Blaine graciously concurred. I reckoned she was passing herself off as first cousin to the Queen for this one. Yanks went for that kind of shit.

  The big man didn’t seem entirely convinced. ‘Only it’s not the kind of thing most guys’d go along with...’

  Blaine took his hand across the table. ‘Yes, but we’re hardly ‘most guys’ here, are we, Chester?’

  ‘Well, no time like the present, huh?’ Chester pushed his chair back. ‘Ellis? You want to get the gear?’

  This was the cue his partner had been waiting for. He positively sprang to his feet to collect a black jacket from the high-backed chair by the fire. He took something from the breast pocket and returned to the table.

  ‘This will only take a moment, Finn.’ Chester gave me a kindly, almost avuncular smile.

  ‘What will?’

  ‘Well, Ellis and I, we need you kinda... relaxed tonight. So this is just a little something to make things a little easier for you, really...’

  That was when I saw Ellis open the pack that held two ampoules and a syringe and, too late, I tried to bolt. ‘Jesus no Blaine for fuck’s sake no, please no...’ I garbled as I shoved myself away from the table. As if I had anywhere left to run.

  Blaine was at my side in a second, turning her back on her guests so she could address me in private. Her fingernails dug into my wrist. ‘Yes, Finn. That’s the word you’re looking for.’

  Chester looked on, concerned. ‘Everything okay?’

  ‘I’m afraid Finn is a little silly about needles,’ Blaine explained.

  ‘It won’t be a problem, will it?’ Chester asked, and the slightest frown broke through the botox to crease Ellis’ symmetrical face.

  ‘No, not at all,’ Blaine reassured. ‘Although you might want to keep him still?’

  ‘Oh. Sure.’ Chester came to stand behind me. ‘Why don’t we just take a seat here, Finn?’ he cajoled, and that certainly wasn’t a question, because he pushed me back into the chair and wrapped one great arm around my chest and placed the other hand on my forehead, pulling my head back so that it was trapped against his chest.

  ‘There,’ Blaine said. ‘Now, if you gentlemen will excuse me, I’ll think I’ll retire and leave you to enjoy the rest of your evening.’

  ‘G’night, ma’am, and thank you,’ Ellis called politely without looking up from his work. I watched him carefully mix distilled water with white powder before drawing up the solution into the syringe. He dispassionately tapped the plastic to displace the air bubbles, and joined his lover at my side.

  Dread filled every fibre of me as Ellis patted the vein in the crook of my left arm to raise it, and the more I struggled the more I could feel their excitement rising. My fear was a powerful aphrodisiac.

  ‘Shh, there now, pretty thing, it’s fine, everything’s going to be okay,’ Chester soothed, and increased his grip on my head and chest. ‘There’s a good boy – just a little scratch, and that’s the last you’ll know about it.’

  As the needle pierced my skin, I remembered. Remembered where I’d been the first time this had happened, what had been done, why I had been terrified ever since.

  Then as Ellis depressed the plunger, all of it ceased to matter. My last lucid thought was that I might just get the exit from Albermarle that I had so often craved, then the drug finished its circuit around my overloaded system and I stopped being able to think at all. Bereft, defeated and utterly exhausted, I had reached the end of a long, hard road. I stopped fighting, and let myself fall.

  Chapter Twenty Four

  Lilith

  I sat in bed with the quilt tucked up to my chest and a blanket draped over my shoulders and attempted to sketch the marketplace in Santa Marita from memory. The early darkness meant that I couldn’t work on Blaine’s portrait much after four o’clock but I needed to keep myself busy until I became exhausted enough to sleep. Adding a second run to the end of my day helped a little, but my head still raced until the very moment sleep overcame me.

  I was just considering a trip to the kitchen to warm some milk, carving knife tucked into the waistband of my pants, when there was a distinctive rap at the door.

  I pulled the chair away from the door and prepared to face Blaine for the first time since she’d politely requested that Coyle break my fingers. I took a deep breath, rested a trembling hand on the door handle, and prepared to give my employer a demonstration of the new, improved Lilith.

  I opened the door, and there she was, dressed in cream satin nightdress and dressing gown.

  ‘That really isn’t necessary, Lilith.’ Blaine glanced at the displaced chair. ‘Your behaviour’s been exemplary since our last meeting. As long as it continues that way, you’ve absolutely nothing to worry about.’

  ‘Thank you.’ I managed a good balance of ‘subdued’ and ‘sincere’. Only two words, but so far, so good.

  ‘May I come in?’

  I stepped aside. ‘What can I do for you?’ I could see her examining my face for the first sign of guile or mockery, but I knew she would find none.

  She perched daintily on the end of my bed. ‘I feel I’ve been a little remiss. I know we’ve had our differences lately, but if I’m honest I’ve rather missed your company.’

  I kept quiet. I was trying to prove that I’d learned my lesson, but echoing that sentiment would be pushing it.

  ‘Anyway, I’ve found myself with a free evening, so I wondered if you’d care to join me for a drink? Informal – no need to get changed.’

  I paused long enough to suggest I was actually thinking about it properly, but not long enough to look like I was formulating a refusal. ‘That would be... nice,’

  ‘Wonderful. Oh, and don’t forget your inh
aler,’ Blaine advised as I wrapped my dressing gown around my shoulders.

  *****

  Blaine pushed the door of the viewing chamber open and ushered me in. I shut my eyes in readiness for whatever horror awaited on the other side of the glass.

  Nothing. The room beyond was in darkness. Only the chamber was lit, and a bottle of Pouilly Fuissé and two glasses stood waiting for us.

  ‘It’s been a while since I’ve opened a bottle of this.’ Blaine handed me a glass. ‘I thought I should serve your favourite – a small ‘welcome back’ present.’

  I took a sip of a wine I used to adore and knew I would never be able to stomach a single drop of the stuff for the rest of my life.

  We sat, she on the chaise longue and I on a bank of cushions at her feet like an obedient lapdog, and I thought that this might be all that was required of me.

  But Blaine was nothing if not thorough. As far as she was concerned, I still had a final lesson to learn. ‘Here we are.’ The door to the room before us silently opened. ‘My latest guests: Chester Hemingford and Ellis Simonette. Chester’s the elder of the two,’ she explained, as if I my enjoyment might be hampered by not knowing every detail.

  A tall, thick-set man held the door open so that his shorter, younger companion could step inside. He had his arm firmly around the waist of a third man whose face was masked in shadows.

  In the days since I had last seen him, Finn had lost at least a stone. A pair of beltless jeans hung off his hips, revealing the sharp ‘V’ of his pubis, and his collar bones jutted through the thin fabric of the t-shirt I had bought him in London. He had been drugged to oblivion with something that had rendered him unable to stand unaided, and his left leg buckled under him with each step. His eyes were dull and unblinking, as though a part of him was already dead. Something was terribly wrong.

  ‘What have they given him?’ I managed to ask.

  ‘I’m not entirely sure. Ellis injected him with some sedative or other.’

  ‘Oh no, Blaine, he’s so scared of needles -’

  ‘That’s all part of the experience, if you recall.’

  Ellis half-carried Finn to the edge of the bed and sat him down, then paused to kiss his partner before disappearing into the bathroom. When he re-emerged, he was carrying a small bowl of steaming water and a handtowel. Chester opened out a roll of fabric onto the bed, before reverentially picking up a cutthroat razor.

  As Ellis cradled Finn’s lolling head, Chester began to shave him with a barber’s skill, covering his stubbled face with foam before removing it with long deft strokes.

  Once every trace of shaving foam had been wiped away, Ellis pulled the t-shirt over Finn’s head and yanked the jeans down over his skeletal hips without needing to unfasten them. Then, with the same meticulous care, Chester used the razor to remove every last trace of hair from Finn’s emaciated body.

  Finally, Ellis handed over a small pot of hair gel. Chester used the contents to slick their toy’s hair away from his gaunt face and stepped back to admire his handiwork. Finn could have passed for fifteen again, and that was when I knew who these men were and what they wanted.

  ‘Oh please, no,’ I whispered.

  ‘A little slower than usual, Lilith,’ Blaine observed. ‘I’d expected you to work it out the moment you saw them.’

  ‘Please don’t make me watch this.’ This time the humility in my voice was entirely genuine. Royce Garvey had scared me, but these two men were in an entirely different league. Royce had been a drunken amateur; these men were sober, professional sadists.

  Blaine stroked my hair maternally. ‘It’s for your own good, darling. You need to understand that you can’t stop this. There’ll always be a demand, and I will always be able to find someone to cater for whatever request I receive. If you’d just let things be, this could have been some anonymous little juvenile delinquent, hundreds of miles away, instead of the man you appear to love. That’s why I need you to watch.’

  As regretful as she sounded, there was no doubt that this was how it had to be. I sat obediently and observed as, having created their perfect boy, the two men proceeded to destroy him.

  *****

  As Ellis slumped in a chair and watched, an erection already obvious through his black jeans, Chester sat next to Finn and cupped that fragile, beautiful face in his hands, turning his head so that it was in profile and kissing him hard, grabbing at his hair and forcing his tongue through unwilling lips. As if in slow motion, Finn began to respond and returned the kiss with automatic, desperate passion.

  Blaine turned to me. ‘Look at that. He’s virtually comatose, but he still knows all the moves. I’ve never known such a professional little slut.’

  I flinched at the words and she laughed. ‘Oh Lilith, are you still playing the Salvationist? Watch him at work and tell me – what else was he going to do? It’s not as though I abducted him from the corridors of Dublin University, or stopped him from making the final breakthrough in the fight against cancer. He was a whore when I met him. A highly accomplished one, I’ll grant you, but a whore nonetheless. All I did was provide him with a better territory.’

  Chester finally broke away from the kiss and began to undress, carefully removing and folding each garment. Ellis got an opportunity to play now, and as he stepped into the pool of light by the bed, I saw the cruelty in his designer smile. He casually drew his right arm back and hit Finn hard across the face with the back of his hand and the man who had once happily fought three of Coyle’s thugs at the same time collapsed back onto the bed, the first blood of the night leaking from the corner of his mouth in a thin trickle. He didn’t even raise a hand to wipe it away.

  Blaine wore an expression that suggested equal parts arousal and triumph. She clearly found my disgust amusing. ‘It’s time you faced an unpleasant truth, Lilith. I don’t think you can deny that there’s something in this scenario that fulfils Finn in a way you never will.’ She returned to running her fingers through my hair. ‘You might just be trying to rescue someone who really doesn’t want to be saved.’

  Ellis wrapped his hands around Finn’s neck, thumbs resting on his windpipe, and began to squeeze; softly at first, almost a caress. As the grip tightened Finn’s first instinct was to reach out and rest his fingers on Ellis’ cheek in hopeless entreaty. Even through the silencing glass, I could understand the mouthed ‘No’.

  ‘Blaine, they’re going to kill him,’ I whispered.

  ‘Don’t be ridiculous. It’s just air play,’ Blaine corrected me. ‘If you deprive a man of oxygen for long enough, then restore the supply, it produces a far more impressive erection. Although in Finn’s case any erection at all would be impressive.’

  As I watched, impotent and sickened behind our barrier, Chester grinned in delight and stroked his hard-on, and Finn began to convulse. His back arched and his hands thrashed against the sheets, flailing uselessly as Ellis continued to choke him. The second the hold was released the seizure stopped and Finn’s chest heaved, but this was the only movement he made, much to his tormentor’s annoyance. Ellis had expected some sign of arousal, but Finn wasn’t even capable of consciousness now.

  ‘Oh come on, Finn,’ Blaine hissed. ‘Give them something, for heaven’s sake.’

  If she was concerned that her latest customers might ask for a refund, she needn’t have worried. Despite Ellis’ initial irritation at Finn’s inconsiderate lapse, they were both more than happy to continue playing. As Ellis began to unbutton his shirt, Chester hauled Finn over so that he was now lying face-down on the quilt, then returned to the discreet leather holdall that held their toys. He extracted a tiny brown glass bottle – amyl, I guessed – and an unopened tube of lubricant. He threw the lube to Ellis but kept the bottle for himself.

  Chester unscrewed the bottle, lifted it to his nose and inhaled deeply, before holding it for Ellis so that he could do the same. Finally he masked Finn’s nose and mouth with his cupped hands so that he had no choice but to breathe in the fumes as Ellis
squeezed a gobbet of lube onto the back of his right hand and smeared it across his fingers so that they gleamed in the candlelight. I looked away, but Blaine caught hold of my chin and turned my face back towards the window. ‘Consequences, Lilith.’

  Finn’s face contorted in agony as a clenched hand was shoved deep into him, and when Ellis pulled his fingers away blood and shit glistened across his knuckles. He must have deemed him ready, because without any further ceremony he began to fuck Finn with lethal savagery.

  From there on in, the two men simply took it in turns to rip their prey apart as Blaine and I looked on. She calmly sipped her wine, alternating her approving gaze between the assault and my reaction to it.

  Chester was the first to roll away from Finn’s battered body, spent and happy, as Ellis brought himself to one last heaving climax above their plaything’s bowed and insensible head. He grinned with obscene joy as he came, leaving viscous strings of semen to drip over Finn’s hair and shoulders.

  When it was all over, Chester and Ellis lay back on the opulent bed with its bank of cushions and pillows and opened a bottle of champagne, giggling as bubbles cascaded from the bottle and over their naked thighs and flaccid cocks. I watched in silence as they embraced and raised their glasses to each other, congratulating themselves on living out their sordid fantasy.

  They left Finn slumped across the foot of the bed; he had fulfilled his use. His head was tilted back and turned towards the two-way mirror, and his glazed eyes were open, the left one stained crimson from a burst blood vessel, staring straight at me in blank despair. His arms were outstretched as if in supplication and his fingers twitched against the sheets.