“Don’t touch me,” I growled.
“Sorry. I really don’t want you to be uncomfortable, and I know you’ve been through an ordeal, I just don’t know how else to do this.”
“Do what?”
“Tell you who I am.”
“What?” Her words didn’t make sense. “Who are you?”
I heard my name being called over and over. It was impossible to ignore the noise when it was Beau’s voice, filled with panic, calling for me. The tremor in his voice
Without waiting for a response, I backed away from her. “I’ve got to go.”
“Wait. Please,” the woman begged as she followed my retreat.
Needing to get to Beau and calm his panic, I didn’t have time for more than a, “What?”
“Can you please just ask your dad to call me?” She slipped me a card. “Please? It’s important.”
Without taking any time to consider her words, I glanced down at the details. Veronica Hancock. The name meant nothing to me. I nodded as I slipped the card in my pocket and turned away.
I followed the sound of Beau’s voice, pushing myself as fast as my legs would carry me towards him. When I was close enough, I tumbled straight into his arms.
“Are you all right, darlin’?” he asked as he brushed the sweat-soaked strands of loose hair away from my face.
I shook off his concern. “I’m fine. Is the race over?”
“Yeah.” He took a moment to assess my expression, and must have decided that I was all right, because he added, “Y’all came second.”
Swallowing hard to fight the rising panic, I offered a small smile. “Not too shabby.”
“I was worried when I saw you were gone,” he admitted as we headed back towards the pit.
“There was a moment that I was a little worried too. But then I met someone who made me see how important it might be to be out on the track.”
“Who’s that?”
“Mary.” I ducked my head. “Apparently, I’m her role model.”
Beau squeezed my hand. “I’d say she has some good taste.”
I offered him a smile and pushed to head towards the pits.
When we passed an area that was a little less crowded, Beau directed me to one side. “I should warn ya, darlin’, your daddy is on the warpath in there at the moment.”
My throat closed over, and dread climbed my ribs like a ladder. “Because of me?”
Beau frowned as he shook his head. “Because of that damn reporter, but he’s takin’ it out on everyone ’round. He’s not mad at you, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he leaps on you the second you arrive safe ’n’ sound. I wanted ya to be prepared.”
Taking a moment to steady my breath, I nodded. “I’m ready.”
We covered the last of the ground, and I braced myself as I headed back into our pit. Thankfully, the area was largely deserted—the bulk of the people must have taken to the track to celebrate the results.
Just as Beau had warned, Dad was in front of me in an instant. Thankfully, he seemed to remember himself and didn’t drag me straight into his arms.
“Are you okay?” His gaze pierced into me.
I gave a small nod and squeezed Beau’s hand. “I just got spooked.”
“Stupid fucking arsehole reporter. He knew about the embargo, but he got greedy and wanted a scoop.”
At Dad’s outburst, a few heads turned our way. The longer I spent at the track, the more I could see this situation wasn’t going to work.
I rested my hand on Beau’s arm. “Beau, can you take Angel and find some food and drinks for us?”
There was already enough nibblies and water in the pit area that he was sure to know it was a request for privacy more than anything else. Thankfully, he took the hint.
“Can we talk?” I asked Dad as Beau headed off to do what I asked.
I led Dad back to the area of the pits he’d cordoned off for me. When I was sure we were alone, I indicated to the seats before taking one myself.
“What’s up?” he asked before glancing towards the track. It wasn’t a malicious act, in fact, I wasn’t sure he even realised he’d done it. The truth was he should have been out there celebrating with everyone else, but instead he was in here with me. Because of me.
“I won’t keep you long. I know you need to get back to the team.”
His gaze swivelled back to me. “You’re part of the team.”
“I know. That’s what I wanted to talk about. I think we need to reassess this plan.”
He fought hard to hide his disappointment, but I saw the evidence of it in the crease at the corners of his eyes and the downward turn of his lips. “What part of it?”
“I can’t be on a media embargo forever. We both know that. I don’t know how to do this.” I played with the ends of my ponytail. “I don’t know how to go back to how it was. It isn’t only you that should be out there celebrating. I should be in the middle of that crowd; up on that podium.” Even saying the words was enough to cause my heart to palpitate.
“No one expects—”
I held up my hand. “You and I both know that’s a lie. Everyone expects it. Otherwise, we wouldn’t have had that issue with the reporter today.”
“Pheebs, that—”
“Please, let me finish,” I pleaded. “You’re right in a way. No one who knows what I went through expects anything more than I can give.”
The grin that lifted the corner of his lips was almost victorious. As if he thought he’d won the argument because of my words.
“But very few people know what that is. I don’t think many others will understand the struggle simply because they don’t know how hard this is for me.”
“What are you saying?”
“I think I need to choose between my privacy and this career.” It was something I’d always had to do, but it had never been such a hard choice. “I think—” I drew a steeling breath. “I think I need to tell everyone the truth. The whole truth; or at least as much of it as I dare.”
“What?”
“How many times has Mum fielded a call from some news outlet wanting to be the one who gets the exclusive tell-all?”
He didn’t answer, but the way he screwed up his mouth did an adequate job anyway.
“Tell one of them yes. Get Mum to work her magic on the contract so we can make sure the message gets out right.” My stomach twisted, and I wanted to vomit even saying the words, but there wasn’t any way for me to take the reins of the car for the next race season if it didn’t happen. It wouldn’t stop the reporters or the fans, but knowing the truth might make them pause just long enough to give me room to breathe.
“Are you sure about this?”
I nodded. “I have to be. Or I have to say goodbye to this career.”
His hand came to my knee in a reassuring gesture. “I’ll talk to Mum and see what she thinks.”
I tipped my lips up and nodded to acknowledge what he’d said.
He patted my knee. “I better get out there.”
“Okay.” As he walked away, a flash of the stranger who’d approached me came into my mind. “Wait, Dad, who’s Veronica Hancock?”
He froze midstep and spun back to me. Even as he stared at me, the colour drained from his cheeks. “Where did you hear that name?”
“She was here and gave me her card.” I grabbed it from my pocket and held it out to him.
“Fucking bitch,” he murmured under his breath as he grabbed the card from me. “How dare she approach you.”
“Who is she?”
He tore the card in half. “She’s no one.”
Before I could press for more, he disappeared.
WITHIN A WEEK of the race, Mum’s team had a shortlist of news outlets that were champing at the bit for a chance to interview me. To ensure they couldn’t blindside me, each one had to send a proposal including how many people they expected in the room, which reporter on their team would be doing the interview, and what experience they had with similar c
ases. They also had to provide information about where they wanted to have the interview and whether they would be happy for Dr Bradshaw to be onsite.
I was lying on my stomach on my bed, midway through weighing up my options, when Beau returned from Emmanuel Racing. While Mum and Dad spent time at the hospital visiting Georgia, my newest baby sister, in the special care nursery, Beau had taken to being Dad’s eyes and ears at the office. Thankfully, there had been a few rumours of Georgia possibly coming home soon, so I hoped things would settle back to normal after that.
“Your family amazes me,” Beau said as he climbed beside me on the bed.
“Why’s that?” I asked.
He nodded towards the interview requests. “I ain’t never seen anything like that before. The respect that the media show to your mama.”
I chuckled. “I can show you a thousand articles that would dispute your claim. But where we can control the information, Mum is pretty good at checking over everything and considering the options that could go wrong. I just hope I can do an okay job in her place.”
“You’re worried because she can’t do this for you?”
“A little. Mostly I’m terrified of making things worse. Talking with you, or Angel, or even Dr Bradshaw, is one thing. Talking to a stranger, telling them”—I had to swallow to control my voice—“what they did to me. I still don’t know if I’m actually ready for it.”
Beau grabbed the piles of paper in front of me and shifted them to my dresser. “Then don’t do it.”
“I have to.” I’d already explained the way I felt to him, so I didn’t need to explain it more.
He moved back to the bed before coaxing me onto my side and into his arms. “Whichever one you choose will be the right one then. Besides, you’ll have Dr Bradshaw, me, Angel, and at least one of your parents there for you.”
I closed my eyes and relaxed into his hold. “I know.”
After lying in his embrace for a few minutes, listening to his heart beating against his chest, desire stirred inside of me. We hadn’t been together again since our weekend together down in Sandown, where we’d been truly intimate for the first time since I’d come home. It wasn’t for lack of interest on my part. The house was still in chaos because of Mum’s recovery from emergency surgery, Georgia being in the special care nursery, and the demands of one of the busiest times of the race season. As all of that pressed in on the family, alone time had been scant for all of us.
As my need to connect with Beau again grew, I lifted my lips to his and initiated a kiss. It didn’t take long for our tongues to tangle. My heart pounded at the thought of what might happen next. I wanted it, but there was still part of me that was scared. I could never be sure how my body or mind would react to the different ways Beau might touch me.
Regardless, my fingertips found the buttons on his shirt, and I started to work my way down them. Beau’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he reached for my hand, stilling my fingers.
“What is it?”
“It’s been a long day,” he said. “Can’t I jus’ hold ya?”
“Of course.” I rested my head back against his chest and breathed in time with him.
We stayed like that for ages until Angel knocked on the door. I hadn’t even realised she was there. It made sense though because I hadn’t been harassed by everyone in the family over homework and after-school snacks and the assortment of other things my siblings usually wanted.
“Your dad just called,” Angel said, “he’ll be home soon. Your mum is staying overnight in the hospital.”
I bolted upright, and Beau released me instantly as I did. “What? Is there something wrong?”
Angel shook her head. “He didn’t say, but he didn’t sound upset. In fact, he sounded happier than I’ve heard him for a while.”
I stepped off my bed and grabbed the proposals from the dresser before turning them over and fanning them out like a stack of cards.
“Pick one,” I said to Angel.
“What?”
“Just pick one. I’ve looked over them too much, and I want to make a decision before Dad gets home.” They all had so many things in common, and none of them held anything I didn’t think I could handle so any choice was going to work for me. That was what had made it so hard to choose.
“That one.” She pointed to one in the middle.
I slipped it on the top of the pile. “Decision made.”
“Darlin’—”
The warning in Beau’s voice set me on edge, so I cut him off. “Decision. Made.”
I offered Angel my hand, and we headed out to the living room to wait for Dad.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were here?” I asked as Beau moved to the couch to sit with my brother Parker and my sister Beth. Nikki was in a playpen in one corner. I figured Brock was either in his room or at a friend’s house. If it weren't for the lack of our parents, it almost would have been the picture of familial bliss. It was so different from the situation in the household just months earlier when I hid away from them all every day.
“Beau thought you might need some time alone to try to sort through your thoughts on the interview.”
“Sorted. So tell me what’s been happening for you?”
She led me into the kitchen to finish dinner while she told me about her study and her most recent visit to her mother.
When the phone rang, I let Beau get it. I was trying to get better, and I had made leaps and strides, but that didn’t mean I wanted to get caught on the end of a phone call that might set me back. Beau and Angel both seemed to recognise and accept that.
“I’m sorry, he ain’t here right now.” Beau paused. “I can’t say, but I can take a message if ya like.”
I watched his back as he spoke on the phone. As I did, I considered how damn lucky I was to have him in my life. There had been a time I’d thought I should never fall in love because I didn’t know whether I would have complications because of my kidney transplant. Then, after I’d fallen further for him than I’d thought was possible, I’d tried to push him away because of the things I’d done—and failed to do—while Xavier and his family had kept me prisoner.
Through it all, Beau had pushed back, trying to be a constant in my life. Now, I couldn’t imagine it without him. Until the weekend of the race in Sandown, I’d worried that might be a possibility—that he might need to go home to the States—but even that worry was behind us now with Dad’s sponsorship. It didn’t mean he’d be able to stay in Australia forever, but by the time that visa ended, we’d be able to prove a long-term relationship. Maybe even a de facto one if Beau had his way.
One by one, the pieces of my life were snapping together.
Beau spun around after he’d jotted down whatever message he’d taken from the person on the other end of the phone. He caught the direction of my gaze and gave me one of his beaming grins. “Sure thing. I’ll let him know ya called.”
Embarrassed at being caught in my blatant ogling, I twisted away from him and turned my attention back to Angel. Her gaze dropped from my face to the pots and frying pan in front of her.
“Hey, what’re you thinking?” I asked as her teeth sank into her bottom lip.
“Huh?” Her gaze lifted to meet mine. “Oh, nothing.” She grabbed the spatula and pushed the meat around the pan.
“Are you sure?”
She nodded.
Before I could quiz her again, Beau came up behind me. He signalled his intention and then wrapped his arms around me from behind. The feeling of his front pressed hard against my back still made my body tense and my heart race—that had been Bee’s favourite position as he tortured me—but it also reminded me of Beau’s words and actions in the bath during our first time together after everything. I hummed as his fingers traced delicate patterns over my stomach. He rested his chin on my shoulder as I leant back against him. Closing my eyes, I took a moment to just breathe.
I opened my eyes again and caught Angel leaning against the bench watching us.
“Who was on the phone?” she asked Beau as she turned back to dinner.
“Some woman looking for Mr Reede.”
“Dec,” I said, nudging his ribs. Dad wasn’t one for formal titles. Even at the office, almost everyone called him by his name unless talking to someone outside of the team. The only reason I didn’t hassle Angel to change her habits was that I knew what she’d gone through and there was no way I would make her relive her trauma over something as silly as a name. I understood that part of her more now than perhaps I ever could have before. “What was her name? Maybe I can call her back, so Dad doesn’t have to.”
“It’s over there.” He indicated towards the phone. “Veronica something.”
I tugged free of Beau’s hold and rushed to check the notepad by the phone. The name he’d written was the same one as the woman who had approached me at Sandown. After seeing Dad’s reaction to her name then, I figured he wouldn’t want to see it now. With everything else, I didn’t want to add to his stress. I tore the sheet off the pad and slipped her number into my pocket.
Beau was right behind me when I turned around. “Darlin’, what’s happening?”
“Apparently she’s been hassling Dad for almost a year now. I don’t want him to have any issues with everything else going on.”
Before we could say anything more, the door opened, and Dad stood there grinning from ear to ear. “I have good news.”
Everyone gathered around Dad.
“What is it?” I asked.
“Mum’s bringing Georgia home tomorrow. We found out a couple of days ago that it was a possibility because Georgia is thriving even though she’s no longer on oxygen, but today she breastfed for the first time, and the doctors are incredibly happy with her weight gain. Mum’s there overnight, and I’ll drive in tomorrow morning to pick them up.”
Beth, Angel, and Parker all celebrated.
My heart felt like ice at the news. Beau’s hand slipped into mine, making me jump. I should’ve been happy. Should have felt like everything was right in the world now that my littlest sister was out of the woods and coming home.
Phantom (Phoebe Reede: The Untold Story #5) Page 3