Thor Is Locked in My Garage!

by Robert J. Harris

  “So is there any way one of the treasures could help him get back to Asgard?” asked Lewis.

  “What about the shoes?” said Greg. “Could he walk there if he had them?”

  “He already gave the shoes away to Garth here,” said Susie, “so that can’t be it.”

  “Sven, is there anything else that could connect Asgard and Earth?” Lewis asked.

  “There used to be the world tree, the Yggdrasil,” said Thor. “That connected the Nine Realms of the Universe, but it was destroyed centuries ago by the frost giants.”

  “Hey!” Greg exclaimed. “Didn’t you say one of the treasures was some kind of seed?”

  Thor’s eyes grew wide. “Ja, the Yggdrasil Seed. Gotterdamerung! That’s it, guys!”

  “What is this seed, Sven?” asked Susie. “Some sort of GM crop?”

  “The seed is all that is left of the world tree after it was destroyed,” said Thor.

  “Do you suppose Loki could use it to grow a new Yggdrasil tree?” Lewis wondered.

  “You may be on to something,” Thor said. “And if he used it to reach Asgard…” His voice tailed off and his eyes became gloomy.

  “Yes, what?” Lewis prompted him.

  Thor drew a deep breath. “Then he could sit upon the throne of Odin and be master of Asgard.”

  “That doesn’t sound good,” said Susie.

  “It sure isn’t good, Susie,” said Thor. “With the power of Asgard at his command, that villain could destroy all us other gods… and the Earth as well.”

  10. People in Glass Houses

  “You mean he’d bring on Ragnarok,” Lewis gasped, “the end of the world!”

  Makepeace choked on his coffee. “End of the world? What kind of a picture are you guys cooking up?”

  “Hang on,” said Greg. “A tree takes years to grow, so this Iggy-dross world tree must take even longer.”

  “Not if it’s been genetically modified,” said Susie. “You should pay more attention to the news.”

  “These magical things don’t follow the normal rules,” said Lewis. “Remember Lokiday? And look at how fast this winter weather came on.”

  “So is Loki going to keep bouncing around town till he finds the seed?” asked Greg.

  “If that was the case, there would be no point luring us out here,” said Lewis. “He must have worked out how to get the one treasure he’s been searching for all along, and he wanted us nowhere near it.”

  Susie leaned forward over the back of the passenger seat. “How about it, Sven? Can you tell which treasure is which when you detect them?”

  “No,” answered Thor. “I just get a fix on the general area they are in.”

  “Maybe there’s a logic to it,” suggested Lewis. “Remember Loki told us he found the ring under the gravestone of a man named Bell?”

  “And the shoes were in a shoe shop, right, Mr Makepeace?” said Susie.

  “Right,” the actor agreed.

  “And the hammer was in our garage among the tools,” said Greg. “But what about the winter box? Why was that under the Swilken Bridge?”

  “Loki said the Troll King made it for him,” said Lewis, “and in the old stories, trolls live under bridges.”

  “Like in the Three Billy Goats Gruff,” said Susie. “You’re right, Lewis, there’s a pattern to it.”

  “So where would the seed be?” Greg wondered.

  Thor thumped his fist on the steering wheel in front of the actor. “Makepeace, what else did Loki say to you?”

  The actor blinked. “You mean Larry? Not much. When he left me here, he said he was going to the only place in town that’s warm all year round. I guess he was going to a sauna.”

  “A sauna?” said Greg. “That doesn’t make any sense.”

  “He wasn’t talking about a sauna,” said Lewis excitedly. “There’s another place that’s kept warm all year round. The Botanic Gardens.”

  “What’s so warm about a garden?” said Greg.

  “Oh right, you’ve never been there, have you?”

  “And why would I want to wander around looking at plants, Lewis? I’m not a farmer.”

  “They have a lot of tropical plants there,” said Susie. “They keep them in glasshouses that are always warm.”

  “It sounds like the perfect place for the Yggdrasil Seed,” said Lewis.

  “I think you’ve hit the nail on the head,” said Thor. “Where are these gardens?”

  “They’re right across town,” said Greg. “Loki made sure to lure us in the wrong direction.”

  “We can show you the way,” said Susie.

  “What are you guys up to?” said Garth Makepeace, sounding bemused. “It sounds like some kind of scavenger hunt.”

  “Mr Makepeace…” Lewis began.

  “Call me Garth.”

  “Garth, you should try to get back to your hotel.”

  “Are you kidding?” exclaimed the actor. “I was bored out of my skull back there. Why else do you think I played along with this gag of Larry’s?”

  “We are on a dangerous quest, Makepeace,” said Thor. “It is no place for a play actor.”

  “You don’t need to worry about me,” said Makepeace. “Not as long as I’ve got this.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small golden object.

  Thor squinted at it. “A cigarette lighter?”

  “It’s my lucky lighter,” said Makepeace. “Back home in Missouri my old man gave it to me when I was fifteen. ‘Son,’ he told me, ‘the discovery of fire was the beginning of human civilisation. As long as you can make fire, you’ll never be out of luck.’”

  He pressed the switch and a small flame sprang from the lighter. “I’ve been carrying it around ever since and you know what? He was right. I’ve been one lucky guy.”

  He snapped the lighter shut and slipped it back in his pocket.

  “It’s going to be easier just to let him tag along,” said Greg.

  Lewis nodded resignedly.

  “All right then,” Thor agreed. “But try to stay out of our way.”

  “You won’t even know I’m there,” Makepeace promised. “I’ll be like the Invisible Man, you know, in that old movie.”

  “We only have four pairs of skis,” Susie pointed out.

  “Makepeace can share mine,” said Thor. “I’ll have to keep an eye on him anyway.”

  As soon as they left the warmth of the car, the cold air hit them like the slap of an icy hand.

  “I sure am glad I’ve got this coat,” said Makepeace, flapping his arms to stay warm. “It’s like Ice Station Zebra out here.”

  When the others had fastened on their skis, Thor said, “You get behind me, Makepeace, with your feet on the skis. Hang on tight to my belt and don’t let go.”

  Makepeace followed the instructions with a perplexed expression. “It’ll take forever waddling all the way across town on these things.”

  “Not as long as you think,” said Greg. “Okay, Sven, fire them up.”

  Thor held Mjolnir aloft and the skis immediately started moving.

  “Yeehoo!” exclaimed Makepeace. “That’s some trick, Sven. Have these things got motors in them or what?”

  “Quiet, Makepeace, or I’ll make you walk,” Thor growled.

  “Got you,” the actor acknowledged.

  They gathered speed, racing along Lamond Drive. Even if anyone had been out in the street to spot them, they were virtually invisible amidst the snow flurries. Lewis directed Thor along Broomfaulds Avenue and down the Canongate until they pulled up at the entrance to the Botanic Gardens. There was no snow falling on the car park and the path beyond the gate had been swept clear.

  “Loki’s made it easy for himself to get around,” said Greg, “and for us, too.”

  “He thinks we’re at the other end of town sliding around his ice maze,” said Lewis. “He didn’t think we’d catch Garth Makepeace as fast as we did.”

  As everybody took off their skis, Thor said, “Carry them with you. We m
ight need them.”

  “Too true,” said Greg, recalling their battle with the ice serpent.

  With their skis under their arms, they walked past the empty wooden gatehouse and gift shop.

  “The place looks deserted,” said Susie.

  “I expect the staff headed home before they got snowed in,” said Lewis.

  As they passed the tea hut on their right, Makepeace peered through the frosted window. “Say, there’s a coffee machine in there. What do you say we stop for a hot drink?”

  “We will toast our victory later,” said Thor, striding on.

  The snow was piled in heaps on both sides of the path. The tall trees that loomed above them were draped in white, like enormous ghosts. Wooden signs poked out of the snow. Beyond the frozen waste of the Peace Garden they saw the glasshouses. There was a whole row of them linked together by a long corridor, forming a network of controlled environments for exotic plants from all around the world. The glass walls were clouded with condensation. It was impossible to tell if there was anybody inside.

  “We’re too exposed out here,” said Thor, dropping into a crouch. “We must get inside and use the plants for cover.”

  The others hunched down beside him.

  “Loki might not even be here,” said Greg. “He might already have found the seed and bolted.”

  “No,” said Thor. “If he was gone, it would be snowing here. He’s keeping the place clear until he gets what he’s after.”

  Lewis led the way to the main entrance and they stacked their skis outside the door. A sign said Temperate Corridor.

  “Stay behind me,” Thor instructed, “and keep quiet. Taking him by surprise, that is our best chance.”

  “Not much chance of that,” said Greg. “All the walls are made of glass.”

  “Just keep low,” said Thor.

  They passed quietly into a small entrance hall, then through a second door that led into the Temperate Corridor. The first stretch was marked Cool Temperate and was lined with tall green plants.

  To their right was a glass door marked Desert House. Peering in, Lewis saw a long room filled with different kinds of cactus. Some were tall and spindly with needles protruding in all directions; some were thick and squat, though their spines looked just as sharp. Others were just huge clusters of thick, spiky leaves.

  “Now this does look like an alien planet,” Susie murmured.

  “No sign of Loki, though,” said Lewis.

  The next door led to the Alpine House. This featured an aisle of sandstone paving with short, scrubby plants clustered round rocks on both sides. In contrast to the Desert House, it looked tame and domestic.

  “There’s definitely nobody in there,” said Greg. “You couldn’t hide a mouse in those shrubs.”

  Another door marked Warm Temperate led to the next section of the corridor. Here the air was warmer and the plants more lush and colourful. The signs marked out olives, oleander and acanthuss. There were two more glasshouses on the right, but there was no one in there either.

  The door leading into the last stretch of corridor was marked Tropical. Here the air was stiflingly hot and moist. This area housed coffee, banana and papaya plants. The first door on the right was marked Display House. As soon as he glanced through the glass, Lewis hissed, “There he is!”

  Everyone crouched low among the exotic foliage and watched the figure moving at the far end of the glasshouse. There was no mistake this time. It was Loki.

  Makepeace craned his neck for a better look. “Say, that’s a Montague Burton tweed overcoat he’s wearing. I love those!”

  “Down!” Thor commanded, grabbing the actor by the shoulder and forcing him to his knees. “Keep still, and keep quiet!”

  Peeking through a screen of fronds, Lewis saw that Loki was standing in the midst of some potted plants and poster displays. He was gleefully tossing what looked like a large nut up and down in his hand.

  “I think he’s found the Yggdrasil Seed,” said Lewis.

  Thor’s broad face hardened. “Then we must take it from him by force.”

  “Hold on a second,” Lewis cautioned him. “Last time we tackled him head on, he nearly buried us in an avalanche.”

  “You’re right, Lewis,” said Greg. “We need to try something different this time.”

  “How about Garth?” Susie suggested.

  “What do you mean, Spinny?” asked Greg.

  “Loki doesn’t know that Garth is on our side now,” Susie pointed out. “Maybe we can trick him.”

  Lewis saw what she was getting at. “That’s right!” he exclaimed. “With a bit of luck, Garth could get close enough to snatch the seed.”

  “How about it, Garth?” asked Greg. “Are you game?”

  Makepeace looked uneasy. “I can’t say I feel good about it. Larry and I are buds, you know. Are you sure he’s out to destroy the universe?”

  “Yes, we’re sure, Makepeace,” Thor insisted forcefully. “Now are you part of the solution or part of the problem?”

  Makepeace squared his shoulders. “Hey, I’m with you guys.” He grinned. “I’ve saved the world a dozen times in my movies but I never thought I’d get to do it for real.”

  “You need to con him into thinking you shook us off,” said Lewis. “And that you guessed he was coming here.”

  “Don’t let on that you know who he really is,” Greg added.

  “Relax,” said Makepeace. “I won an MTV award, you know. I can pull this off in my sleep.”

  “You only have to keep it up long enough to grab the seed, then get back here fast,” said Greg.

  “I’ll take care of the rest,” said Thor.

  While the others crouched low in cover, Makepeace stood up and smoothed his hair. He opened the door and strolled down the length of the glasshouse as casually as if he were walking into a coffee shop.

  Loki looked up in surprise, clenching the seed tightly in his fist. He asked a question in too low a voice for Lewis and the others to hear, but they could see Makepeace smiling and making friendly gestures. They could tell he had launched into a story about how he’d shaken off Thor and his friends. Loki laughed, and resumed tossing the seed up and down in the air.

  Greg gave Lewis’ sleeve a tug. “I don’t get it. Why does he keep looking at Garth’s feet?”

  Lewis’ heart skipped a beat. They had made a big mistake. “Oh no! We should have thought of that,” he groaned.

  Loki raised a quizzical eyebrow as Makepeace pulled out a large wallet and talked excitedly. A few more words passed between them, then Loki tossed something right at the actor. Makepeace plucked it out of the air, turned and ran.

  The door flew open as he rushed into the Tropical Corridor where the others stood up to congratulate him. “I got the seed!” he declared triumphantly, brandishing his clenched fist. “Let’s vamoose!”

  Lewis was seized by a sudden doubt. “But how did you get it away from him?” he asked.

  “A piece of cake!” laughed Makepeace. “I bet him a thousand bucks I could tell him what plant that nut came from, and he just tossed it to me. See?”

  He opened his hand to display his prize.

  Thor scowled. “Makepeace, that is not the Yggdrasil Seed.”

  Makepeace was stunned. “It’s not?”

  “No,” said Lewis, taking the object from the actor’s palm. “It’s just a pebble.”

  “He pulled a switcheroo on me!” Makepeace gasped. “But why?”

  “Didn’t you notice how he was looking at your shoes?” asked Lewis.

  “Everybody looks at my shoes,” said Makepeace. “I told you, they’re designer.”

  “But they’re not the Shoes of Vidar,” said Lewis.

  Thor nodded sombrely. “And if you’re not wearing the Shoes of Vidar, how did you get across town so fast through all this snow?”

  “Yes, you should have thought of that sooner,” said a mocking voice from behind them. Loki was leaning against the doorway with the seed between his thum
b and forefinger. “There’s a display about ash trees down there,” he continued smugly, “and as some of you might know, the Yggdrasil is a kind of ash.”

  “Thanks for the botany lesson, Loki,” said Greg. “What are you going to do now? Open a garden centre?”

  Loki bared his teeth unpleasantly. “The first thing I’m going to do is get rid of you meddling idiots for once and for all.”

  “Whoa, Larry, there’s no need to get all steamed up,” Makepeace protested mildly.

  “I’m disappointed in you, Garth,” Loki frowned, “taking sides with these losers after all the good times we’ve had.”

  Makepeace laughed unconvincingly. “Hey, Larry, I was just kidding around, you know.”

  “Two things you should never do, my friends,” said Loki. “Never steal a banana from a gorilla and never try to trick the god of mischief.”

  “Enough!” shouted Thor. He strode forward, muscular hands clutching Mjornir with warlike intent. “No more games, Loki. No more ice monsters. Just you and me.”

  “The trouble with you,” sneered Loki, “is you don’t have much imagination. You see, the Yggdrasil Seed has special powers too.”

  Clutching the seed firmly in one hand, he snapped his fingers. As if in answer to his command, the surrounding plants stiffened like soldiers standing to attention. When Loki waved his hand they ripped their roots out of the ground and launched themselves at Thor.

  Thor tried to beat them aside with Mjolnir, but they shot right past the hammer. Two plants whipped themselves around his arms like handcuffs while others piled on top of him and dragged him down like an angry mob. Greg and Lewis waded in to help him, only to be engulfed in the frenzied, thrashing greenery.

  11. Money to Burn

  “This is the worst thing yet!” Greg exclaimed. “It’s like we’re drowning in jungle.” He ducked as a seed pod the size of a football swung at him, just missing his head.

  A leaf as big as a deck chair slammed Lewis in the back. Winded, he gasped, “Hey, the plants weren’t this big when we came in!”