by Piper Kay
I light a smoke and lean back on the couch, closing my eyes. My mind starts to drift to the last night I ever saw him, the night I went to see Payce in county lockup. The night before he went in front of the judge, then got sent off to prison. I remember every detail of it.
***
Seven years ago
Nervously, I walk inside the building. I’ve never been inside a jail before. Five long aisles of people line up to a glass booth, with cops sitting behind the glass. The cop waves me up and I stride up, handing him my ID, as the cop asked. They stick it inside an index file card box, sign off on a paper and point me to another line. The next line goes through a checkpoint, a guarded metal detector, and several cops holding scanning wands. Once cleared, I walk through the machine, and the cops give me a once over with the wand, then all the visitors line-up for the elevator.
Payce is on the 4th floor. Stepping out, I watch several people line up at another guard booth, surrounded in glass, like the one downstairs. As I approach, the guard takes my paper then tells me to find an empty booth and wait. Payce’s name is announced over a speaker somewhere behind a wall, it echoes through the whole place. At least ten minutes passes when I finally see him lined up, wearing an orange jumpsuit, standing behind several other inmates through a window cut out on the wall. He’ll be entering his side of the glass visitation room soon and my heart starts to race. I stare at him, his gorgeous dark eyes don’t show the same sparkle they did the other night, but I smile anyway. No reaction, nothing except a shift in his eyes. I don’t understand, I thought for sure after the night we spent together a few days ago, that he’d be happy to see me, but he seems emotionless, a little confused, lost maybe, and even angry. He’s still fucking gorgeous in my eyes, he always has been. I only got to tell him that a couple times that night, before he was taken into custody, and I love how it made him turn beet red at the time.
As he passes through the metal doorway, it clangs shut behind him and he slowly approaches the booth area. I pick up the phone on my side, he does the same, but still not even a smile. I can fix that.
“Nice outfit, pajama boy.” I laugh into the handset, trying to make him smile.
“Why are you here?” His voice is so cold and bitter.
“I know you have court tomorrow morning and I won’t be able to get up here to see what happens, so I came tonight. You okay?”
“Fucking peachy,” he grunts out.
“What happened, Payce?”
“It doesn’t matter anymore, it’s not important. You need to get away from him. From Aaron, and I mean it. Do you hear me?” He leans forward putting his elbows on the concrete window ledge.
“Okay…yeah. Want to explain that, because I haven’t seen Aaron since you were arrested. Did he get picked up too?” He’s not making any sense, why did he say stay away from Aaron?
He shakes his head no.
“Um…alright. Any idea what will happen in court? Have you talked to a lawyer yet, Payce?”
“Aaron’s not here, so I don’t know what’s up. Oh and in court, they’ll sentence me to prison. Is that all you need?”
God, he’s so angry. “Payce, what’s going on? Why are you being all shitty? I thought you’d be glad to have a visitor, did I do something wrong?” I hope I haven’t. I don’t think so, he just told me the other night how happy I make him, then he got arrested the next morning.
“Well, you thought wrong,” he barks out at me through his phone, brows furrow in the middle. “I didn’t ask for a damn visitor.”
“I just thought, we…” He cuts me off in mid-sentence.
“Look dude, here’s the deal. Fuck the other night, get on with your life and leave me alone. I don’t want you to come back here to visit, or try to write. Nothing.” His voice starts to quake and he stutters a bit. “I just want to be left the fuck alone, got it?” Payce tilts his head to the side and shrugs his shoulders.
“Payce, that’s not fucking fair, you can’t just spit that out and expect me to be okay with it. Not after…” Payce stands on the other side of the glass, and I know he’s about to walk away, there isn’t a damn thing I can do to stop him.
“Life’s not fair, Brax, sorry to break it to you. Now go man the fuck up.”
Payce slams the handset down and turns to walk off toward the exit. He gives me a peace out finger salute over his shoulder and doesn’t look back. The guard opens the metal door and he walks through.
I hang up my phone and stand, my heart sinks into my kneecaps. It takes everything I have to force my feet to move toward the elevator. I push the down button and turn to look back through the glass. Payce leans against the wall, just like when he came in the visitation cell. With his head hung down, he sniffs, inhaling a deep breath, and rolls his shoulders back like a boxer does. He starts walking out of sight. Just as he approaches the solid wall, he looks back at me. He wipes his cheek and our eyes met for a few seconds, then he disappears. That’s the last time I saw Payce.
***
Jesus fucking Christ, what the hell am I doing? I take a final puff of my cigarette and put it out in the ash tray. God I’m such a wussy about this. Way to go, Braxton!
I get up, twist the locks and kill the hallway light on my way to the bedroom. My phone is flashing on the couch. I seize it in my hand and head for bed.
After climbing in, I slide the screen to my text messages and see it in all capitals across the screen.
“I’M SORRY!” ~P
“Call me.” I hit send.
“Why?” ~P
“Because I said so dammit. Quit being a pussy.” Enter!
“Still a cocky little shit, huh, Brax?” ~P
“Excuses, excuses. Man the fuck up.” How’s that for a reversal?
“Asshole, that’s my line.” ~P
“I remember it all too well.” Send.
“Give me five.” ~P
Chapter Eleven
My phone rings, it’s Payce. I swallow hard and raise the pillow behind my head before answering. I’m not sure how much longer I can keep doing this with him, it’s bringing back so many things that I thought I was long past.
“Hey.”
“Brax…ah, hell.” He takes a deep breath and I don’t hear him exhale.
“Payce, you there, is everything okay?” I’m a little concerned. He’s never at a loss for words, he’s always the quick witted one who leaves everyone else stunned, or he used to be.
“I think so.” He coughs. “Yeah…um, I’m great. I shouldn’t have called.”
“Payce, cut the shit. We’re both fucking adults okay. If we have something to say, we should be able to say it. I’m not some child that’s going to get my feelings hurt out on the playground anymore.” He’s pissing me off now, he’s not getting out of his only call that easy.
“Yes, I could tell that earlier.” He stutters a laugh through the phone.
“Crap. Okay, good point. Payce, but you had that one coming for a long time. I needed to say it and…can we just drop this?” Shit!
“Yes.” He breathes into the phone.
“Thank you.” Relief sweeps over me, but I’m not sure what to even say next. I hate when he stumps me like the nineteen year old I used to be.
“You’re right though, Brax.” He sighs.
“About?” Is he finally going to tell me what I need to know?
“I did have it coming, I deserved it. I’m sorry for everything. I fucked up man.” He lets out another deep breath.
“Do you mean that, Payce, seriously?”
“Yes, and something else.”
“Okay, what?” Hell, there’s more, just great.
“Until you said something to me tonight, I’d never thought about it, Brax.”
“What was that?”
“I didn’t realize that you never knew anything about what happened. I thought Aaron would have said something to you. When you told me you hadn’t seen Aaron, it didn’t sink in. Tonight, it did and you are right.”
�
�So you do listen sometimes?” I laugh.
“I’m trying. It’s time you heard the whole story from me. What’s done is already done, I can’t go back and change it now. I did make a choice about us, Brax, and I never gave you the chance to have any say or opinion in it. I’m going to give it to you though. There’s already been too much damage between us. You’ll probably never speak to me after though.”
“Where are you, Payce?”
“Listen…” He gets silent, not say anything, but I know that sound.
Why is he there? I sit straight up in the bed when I hear the ping of a bottle cap bouncing step by step, echoing through the empty warehouse. It’s an old, but familiar sound, something we used to do when bored out of our freaking minds.
The line goes dead.
I jump out of bed, toss on a pair of jeans and a tee shirt, grabbing my jacket on the way out. My car might be broken down at the tavern, but I have my gas guzzler in the garage downstairs.
Tearing out of the parking lot, I’m off heading for Payce. The roads are slick from the rain, but I’m hauling ass as fast as I can to get there. Payce is at the warehouses and nothing else really matters anymore. The place was horrible for us, we damn near froze to death in it, he got arrested there too, but it is also the place we finally gave in. Why is he there?
This shit with us is stupid and needs to be in the past where it belongs. Fuck! Knowing he’s there mean’s Payce is not okay. I shouldn’t have brought up anything, what does it even matter anymore? Right now the important thing is getting to him. Within a few minutes I’m there.
Last time I came here is when Payce was released from prison. The old brick building is exactly the same, shitty and rundown, a real safety hazard. I recognize the glow coming from the window, he has a fire lit. I wonder if it’s the old metal barrel we used to use to burn in, trying to keep warm. Fuck this place brings back memories.
Stepping out of the truck, I enter the building. I tromp up the stairs, slowly and carefully scared I might fall through them. This place should be demolished. Making the turn, I can see the top now, he’s not sitting there pinging caps anymore. I step out onto the top floor, taking a step sideways and back against the wall.
Payce is sitting in the same metal brown chair that’s always been here. He’s leaning forward with both arms across his legs, hands between them. He’s holding a lit cigarette between his fingers, the smoke circles up, winding around his wrists between his legs. On his right shoulder, there’s a tattoo of a lion, and a tree on the left arm. He’s beyond fucking sexy. He looks up at me and his eyes zone in, freezing me in my own footsteps. All I can do is balance myself on the wall. I don’t say a word, but lean back, hooking my fingers in my belt loops, crossing one foot over the other.
Payce’s jawline is perfectly chiseled, damn he could slice glass with it. His mustache and goatee are still new to me, but it enhances everything about his features. After several minutes of staring at me, he arches his left eyebrow, still not saying a word. His expression is alert, sharp and fierce. I’m not sure if he wants to kick my ass or what, but I know the man is so goddamned seductive and sultry, that he’s holding me hostage with just his gaze. He’s pinned me. My tongue glosses over my bottom lip. Holy shit, this chemistry is intense.
A smile peeks at the corner of his lips and he stands. He stalks over to me, eyes still piercing through me. The muscles from his neck down to his shoulders flex and tense with each step, the veins bulge a little as he gets closer. My heartbeat pounds in my ears like bass drums and I hold my breath, he stops about six inches from me. We’re about to fuck or fight. He leans in to me and closes his eyes, inhaling through his nose, edging closer. His fingers graze against the back of my hand and I loosen my fingers from the loops on the side of my jeans.
“God, you smell fucking good. I never forgot that. Brax, I never forgot about us.” Payce opens his eyes.
“Me either.” I’ve been waiting to hear that for seven years.
“You have no clue what you did to me, do you? That night…” I press my finger against his lip, shushing him. Payce nudges his nose against my cheek. “It’s hard to put it into words,” his warm breath whispers in my ear.
“Then don’t,” I say and he inches back. I reach up and wrap my finger around the straps of his wife beater, jerking him to me. “Show me, Payce.”
“Fuck, Brax.” He strokes up and down my arms and moans. His head drops onto my shoulder and his fingers automatically lock around my wrists. He swings my hands above my head, pressing them into the cold brick wall. “I don’t think I can resist you anymore, Brax.” He grins, tightening his grip on me.
“And I’m not sure you can handle me, Payce.” I raise an eyebrow, daring him to try.
“Mmmm...” he purrs between his pursed lips and a wicked sexy grin crosses his face.
His lips press softly against mine and his warm tongue glides across mine, making us both slippery. Payce sucks my bottom lip into his, then grazes his teeth across it.
“Payce,” I moan and quickly break loose from his hands that pin me overhead.
Before he realizes what’s happening, I have my hands on his shoulders and spin him around, slamming him into the brick wall I was against. Some of the older, broken bricks crumble and flake down to the floor behind him. I push him hard with my hands and lock him in. I plunge into his mouth, my tongue exploring the inside of his. He sucks on my tongue, and pushes forward, but I push back.
“Oh God,” he hisses.
I stroke the palm of my hand against the bulge in his crotch, giving him another long passionate kiss and release him. “Follow me back to my place, Payce. I’m not doing this here, not this time.” I release him and walk toward the stairs.
Chapter Twelve
Payce
Braxton crosses the lot at his condo when I ride up and kill the motor on my bike. He turns and a cocky shit-eating grin spreads across his face, he stops in his tracks and waits for me. Fuck he’s sexy as hell.
Not even giving it a second thought, I quickly kick the stand down and stalk toward him. We both rush the stairs, taking the steps two at a time like horny teenagers rushing to get upstairs with each other. At some point we need to talk, between the two of us we’re a pretty explosive combo of pent up anger and frustration, but for right now my first priority is getting the man out of his clothes like I did years ago in the warehouse.
Brax opens the front door and steps in, holding it for me. After I enter, he closes it and bolts the lock. It’s completely dark, except for a dim light shining through a window. I wait for him to lead the way.
He grabs my hand and takes a couple steps, bending to turn on a small lamp in the hallway. I quickly scan the area, seeing a dining area off to the left that connects to a kitchen, before focusing on him again. He takes another step forward and that’s far enough, I can’t resist him anymore. I’m tired of trying to fight it, my cock is aching for him.
I stop dead in my tracks, tired of trying to fight him. My cock needs him now, and my heart never left him. I jerk Braxton back to me, his body crushes into mine. It takes the strength of a fucking Titan to keep me from bending him over the nearest piece of furniture, right here and now. Fuck me! I’ve got to calm down. Slowly, I reach for his waist with both hands and hold his hips, waiting to see if he’s going to rip away from me, saying this was all just a big mistake, punch me, or quit fighting too.
Brax doesn’t move, instead he licks those pouty lips of his, first skimming across the top, then gliding over the lower. I damn near gnaw through my tongue, as he teases me. I want him, and pray like hell that I don’t burst through the zipper of my jeans with the raging hard on that’s tightening the seams. I can’t fucking take this, everything about him still drives me insane and I need to taste him, to feel him again. I take a step forward, causing our feet to trip and he falls back hard against the wall, his keys drop to the floor. Brax yanks me into him and…fucking hell!
With my fingertip, I trace along his
lips, then slide my hand behind his back. I can feel his breath quicken to my touch. Our hips smash together, automatically grinding slowly against each other. He’s driving me goddamned mad.
I snake down his body, and lick my way back up him. His salty skin, mixed with cologne, tingles on my tongue. Shit, so much for staying calm.
“Still so fucking sexy, Braxton.” I press my leg between his and raise my knee, rubbing against his crotch. A hungry growl hums from his throat and escapes his lips, I crush my mouth against his to swallow it.
“Mmmm…and you feel like you missed me, Payce,” he rumbles.
That’s it.
I take his mouth hostage, our tongues tango around each other, darting, pushing and pulling. Before I know it, we’re in the middle of a fucking tongue bash and I love every bit of it. With one hand, I grab his chin, holding him in place as I lick over his delicious kissers, sucking his plump bottom lip into my mouth. I tickle it with my tongue before scraping my teeth over it, releasing him. The wet slurping sound sends me into overdrive with him, and I glide my hand to the front of his pants, palming his hard cock through his jeans.
“Oh shit, Payce.” His breath turns into a rapid pant and I slow my pace, puckering against him. I graze my lips against his, the inside of my bottom lip rolls over his. “God, I want you, Payce,” he rumbles.
“I can see that.” I laugh.
“Still so damn cocky.” A grin peaks at the corner of his lips.
“You wouldn’t even believe…”
“Show me.” And with that, I almost lose it inside my damn jeans. The ache in my groin intensifies to dangerous levels.
I love that he’s challenging me. I shove his head sideways into the wall so hard I think we cracked sheetrock. It was way too hard, and I didn’t mean to, but fuck it was sexy hearing the groan escape from him lips. I slather my tongue down the side of his neck, stopping to take nibbles into his shoulder, then kiss them after.