Her kindness and understanding, her patience and encouragement – they'd beckoned Gabriel from his hiding. And now he ached to start anew, to seize this precious second opportunity with fervor.
Being in her presence was liberating. Doors opened that Gabriel thought were forever sealed. Though the horrors of his past still lingered, they were counterbalanced by Ariah, Emmaline, and even Miriam. A month ago, Gabriel yearned for nothing more than death. Now he couldn’t imagine living without Ariah.
Rivulets of water slid down his muscled thighs as he rose from the tub. Refreshed and pondering what lay ahead, Gabriel wrung out excess water from his hair and combed the locks back with his fingertips. His hair was longer than usual – unfashionably long, Sybil would have surely pointed out – and nearly skimmed the expanse of his shoulders. As usual, his eyes drew to the knife wound that branded his right bicep. It was a never-ending reminder of that night.
Of Lisette.
Unable to bear the sight, Gabriel tossed Jacques’s dress shirt over his head and stepped into the trousers. Damp from the water, the material clung to his chest like a second skin. He paced in front of the vanity mirror and examined his marred face. The flesh was scabby and welted together like torn leather. Fragments of bone still speared through the skin. But the swelling beneath his left eye had subsided almost completely. With each passing day, he grew more accepting of his deformity and felt less need to hide behind linen dressings. Though he still wouldn’t dare step foot outside the walls of the house without the bandage and animal hide glue.
Gabriel nimbly fastened the buttons of Jacques’s dress shirt. His mind spun with unanswered questions. What would become of him and Ariah? Could they start a new life together, free from the binds of their pasts? Within time, could we become a family?
He propped both hands on the vanity’s edge and bowed his head. He’d come so far. And there was so much to lose. Such a thing was both a blessing and a curse.
Lisette’s musical box, Ariah’s three miniatures, and an assortment of medical supplies lined the countertop. Gabriel shoved the forelock from his eyes, contemplating the roll of linen and small tin of glue. Apparently Doctor Mongeau and his driver would be staying for supper.
He caressed the rugged material between his fingertips, more than a bit tempted to apply the dressing. He’d spent over a decade hiding from himself. Now it was time to move forward without regrets or backward glances. Needing no further encouragement, Gabriel turned from his reflection and marched inside the drawing room with determined steps.
Somewhere along this strange journey, hope had emerged from the depths of despair.
•
Supper had come to an end a half hour earlier. Gabriel and Emmaline roughhoused with the puppy near the hearth while Doctor Mongeau rested in the rocking chair. Marius, the charming carriage driver, promptly escorted Miriam off to the side, obvious interest and admiration in his eyes.
Ariah observed their interaction as she cleared the table. From the look of it, Marius appeared to be making decent headway. There was a charming blush that never seemed to fade from Miriam’s cheeks, and genuine laughter erupted from her lips every few moments. Indeed, she seemed swept away in a torrent of raw emotion.
Running a cloth over the tabletop, Ariah smiled to herself and returned to her task.
First love – a beautiful, often dangerous phenomenon …
Memories of Geoffrey flooded her thoughts. When she’d first encountered him at the foster home, he’d seemed a bit rough around the edges, though inherently good-hearted. She’d been depressed and terribly frightened of her foreign surroundings – and Geoffrey had made it his duty to protect and guide her. Ariah had followed after him with blind adoration. After his betrayal and deceit, she’d forged a barrier around her heart. Jacques had softened it, reviving her trust in humanity.
But it was Gabriel who’d broken through completely. She still held her doubts about whether he was worthy of her complete trust. After all, he’d withheld the truth of Jacques’s death. But it only took one passing glance between Gabriel and her daughter to confirm her assertion: he would protect her family at all costs.
Unfortunate events had scarred his mind and body. Yet, at heart, he remained pure and whole. When he believed no one was watching, there was a boyish charm in his smile. Geoffrey also had been ruined – but unlike Gabriel, he’d been unable to preserve his innocence.
Robust laughter clipped her thoughts. Miriam fairly swooned while Marius leaned in close and whispered in her ear. A protective instinct welled in Ariah’s stomach. He appeared to be gentle and honest enough – though one could never know for certain.
Doctor Mongeau rose from the rocking chair. Ariah’s heart melted as Gabriel climbed to his feet and assisted him with a gentle hand to the forearm.
“Why, thank you, good monsieur.”
Gabriel silently nodded and led Doctor Mongeau to Ariah. Scratching wood resounded as Gabriel pulled out a chair and lowered the doctor into the seat. Ariah grinned at Gabriel; he captured her eyes over the table, and she found speaking almost impossible. He was a breathtaking vision of darkness and strains of light wrapped in one.
“Oh, look! Look at Gabriella now!” Emmaline called over her shoulder.
With a subtle nod, Gabriel turned on his heels and went back to Emmaline and the puppy. He knelt beside the hearth and ruffled Gabriella’s floppy ears. Tail wagging, the puppy growled low in her throat and nipped at his hand. Then she rolled onto her back, that peppered tongue lolling from her jaws. Ariah’s skin prickled as he awarded the puppy’s belly a solid rubdown.
How would those hands feel upon my skin?
Would they be rough? Or would they be gentle and attentive? The memory of Gabriel’s kiss seared her mind and body, causing warmth to spike through each limb. Those hands had killed countless men – but they’d also wiped away her tears … and they’d embraced her while she’d spilled her soul and secrets. Ariah had told Gabriel things, painful details of her life … things she’d never breathed to anyone else. Not even Miriam or Jacques.
She sank beside Doctor Mongeau and quietly examined his wrinkled features. The illness was steadily taking over his mind and body. His skin was ashen, those charcoal eyes sunken and rimmed with dark circles. Sorrow spread through Ariah’s heart like an infection. He’d become a dear friend and father figure these past few years. Before supper, after he’d examined Emmaline and Gabriel’s injury, she’d imparted the news of Jacques’s death. Sharing in her loss, he’d embraced her for several minutes, gently rocking her back and forth.
Her thoughts were interrupted by Doctor Mongeau. “That Gabriel – he’s a good man with a sensitive heart,” he said. “Some of the sadness seems to have faded away since I last saw him.” Wise, calculating eyes flickered over her expression. “Some of the sadness has faded from you, too.”
“I’m afraid Emmaline has come to love him.”
For several moments, Doctor Mongeau’s eyes bored into her own. And he drank everything in with an astute awareness. “I can see that.”
Ariah swallowed and absently wrung the material of her skirts. Observing Gabriel and Emmaline’s interaction, Doctor Mongeau settled further into the chair and surrendered to a weary sigh. Emmaline dragged a torn rag across the floorboards, leading the puppy in a merry chase. In a noble attempt to steal the rag, the little creature spun, twirled, and yipped. Rich, youthful giggles bubbled from Emmaline’s throat as she tossed the makeshift toy to Gabriel. He snatched it and followed suit, urging the puppy into frantic circles. Gabriella soon tripped over herself and landed on the floorboards with a muted plop.
Ariah grew warm all over. The spectacle mesmerized her. Seeing Gabriel’s large muscled body crouched beside Emmaline’s petite form was both endearing and strange.
“The three of you make a handsome trio,” Doctor Mongeau said with a chuckle. “And I must say I’m mighty impressed. Who would have known he’d be so great with children?”
“He
tragically lost his daughter years ago.”
Doctor Mongeau nodded empathetically and adjusted the weight of his body. “That explains a lot … though not quite everything.” Ariah’s brow perked. What did he mean by that? Losing his train of thought, he sighed and brought two fingers against his temple.
Ariah reached across the table and laid her palm upon his shoulder. She smiled and gave a gentle squeeze, her voice softening to a tranquil whisper. “Perhaps you ought to be heading home for the night.”
Doctor Mongeau shook his head. Various emotions crossed over his weathered features – and each piqued her curiosity further. “I was wrong, madame. And it shames me. That morning – when I first saw Gabriel … I should have never said such things. I should have never told you to forget him.”
“It was understandable. You were only trying to protect me and my family.”
Doctor Mongeau offered no response. Emmaline’s laughter filled the small space, imbuing the moment with a haunting ambiance. Then he leaned forward, locked onto Ariah’s gaze, and seized her hands with his own. His palms felt like leather and his knuckles appeared translucent. His hands trembled against her fingers, reminding Ariah of his sheer fragility. Intricate webs of blue veins pulsated beneath the pale skin.
She absently traced the design on the back of Doctor Mongeau's gnarled hand. His fingers had once been strong and sure; now they were thin, fragile, and splattered with brown spots. His eyes appeared deeper-set than usual, and a fine sheen of sweat covered his bald patch. Though an inner strength still prevailed; Ariah saw the determination in his gaze, could feel it surging through his body. His grin rearranged the wrinkles that embedded his face, making them appear pronounced in some places and nonexistent in others.
And when their eyes met once more, her breath caught. She knew he was about to say something profound. She felt it with every heartbeat.
“You are like a daughter to me …” His words broke off mid-sentence. “You have a pure heart, Ariah. A truly good, kind heart. It’s a rare thing and one that has great value in today’s world. I know you’ve been through dark times – though you’ve never spoken of them. We’re a sort of kindred spirit, you and me. You fill me with pride.” He exhaled a painful, long-suffering breath and lifted her knuckles against his lips. “Never abandon your gentle nature or trust in people. Promise me this.”
There were so many things she needed to say. She ached to share a part of herself – that dark part of herself that he’d so easily recognized. She needed to confess that it was him and Jacques who’d taught her to trust people once again. But all words lodged inside her throat. Tears pricked her eyes and threatened to spill down her cheeks. The realization slammed against her chest with the force of a hammer. She saw it within Doctor Mongeau’s stare … heard it in each of his words. Her hands quaked against his own. She tightened her grasp, as if the small gesture would prevent him from ever slipping away.
He was saying goodbye.
When she at last spoke, her voice was a broken whisper. “I promise.”
•
Several mornings later, Ariah’s heart fairly stopped at the sound of approaching carriage wheels. She turned to Gabriel, Emmaline, and her sister – who were breaking their fast at the small wooden table – and paced toward the window. The puppy yammered on, jumping about and clinging to her heels at every step. “Shh. Quiet now, Gabriella. Stop your fussing.”
Holding her breath, Ariah swept the faded drape aside and glanced at the outside world. Sunlight speared between the buildings, setting the chipped walkways aglow. As expected, Marius made a charming picture propped in the box seat. But something was marginally different. His head was bowed forward, his features wrought with pain, and every movement was lethargic. Replacing his hat, he leaned forward and mumbled to the two mares before climbing down from the perch.
“Is s-someone here?” Miriam asked as she laid down a chunk of milk-soaked bread.
Ariah swallowed and stepped back, allowing the drape to slide from her fingertips. She inhaled a long breath, whispered a silent prayer, and summoned her courage. “Give me a moment.” Pulse racing in her ears, she feigned a smile and thrust the door open.
•
Ariah and Miriam silently cleared the table as nighttime fell upon the home. Three nights had lapsed since Marius’s appearance.
Emmaline was fast asleep with the puppy, drained from hours of crying, while Gabriel had set off to read inside the bedchamber. Though Ariah had been closest to Doctor Mongeau, his death was a significant loss for all of them. Even Gabriel. After receiving the initial news, Marius had taken Miriam for a long, calming walk. Miriam had returned revived and at ease – and she’d recounted their time together with a maiden blush.
As for Gabriel …
He’d embraced Ariah for countless hours, whispering words of comfort in her ear, massaging her back with reassuring strokes. A smile crept to her lips as she recalled the improper jokes he’d shared in an attempt to lift her spirit. With a feigned look of trauma, she’d playfully socked his shoulder before asking to hear another.
Gabriel had become a dear friend – her lifeline – and with each passing day, he was claiming her heart. Before meeting him, she’d merely survived. Now, with Gabriel at her side, she ached to live.
A heavy silence descended as she and Miriam cleaned up. Mind racing, Ariah ran a broom across the scarred planks. She clasped onto the handle with one hand and held tight to a small military ornament with the other. Exhaling a stiff breath, she leaned the broom against the wall, unfolded her palm, and examined the decoration. Moonlight danced across its surface as it dangled, setting the military ornament aglow.
The letter had explained everything. Doctor Mongeau had earned the trinket many years ago during his service in the war. He’d attached it to a thin chain, transforming the emblem into a makeshift necklace. The military ornament, a heartfelt letter penned by Doctor Mongeau, and details for a different doctor had accompanied Marius’s tragic news.
Ariah’s eyes flooded with tears. She wept for Doctor Mongeau. She wept for Jacques. She wept for her daughter, who she couldn’t guard against the world forever.
The walls seemed to close in. She was suffocating. The desire for fresh air seized hold of her. She yearned to run free, to climb on top of the world, to lay beneath the stars’ intricate constellations, to fill her lungs with the approaching springtime and allow the crisp air to dry her tears.
“Miriam … would you mind keeping an eye on Emmaline?”
Miriam wrinkled her brow as she dusted the mantel with a threadbare rag. “Of course. But w-why?”
“There’s something I want Gabriel to see.” Ariah’s heart stirred in anticipation. Without another word, she smoothed down her coiffure and raced into the back chambers.
Chapter Twenty-one
Silent calm filled Paris’s streets. Stars drenched a black velvet sky and set the cobblestones aglow. Everything was peaceful and still, save for the beat of Gabriel’s heart. Indeed, it pulsated against his rib cage at a maddening rate, as if threatening to shatter flesh and bone. His senses soared while he followed Ariah through the winding alleyways and towering stone buildings. Their hands remained clasped together, binding them as one.
Nothing escaped his notice. Everything seemed to resurrect from the darkness: the wind’s hushed breath as it whispered through the ancient stonework, the wavering shadows that ran up and down the walls like living creatures, the musky scent of swirling chimney smoke …
Never had he felt so alive, hopeful, and prepared for whatever the future might bring.
Ariah had come to him an hour earlier, as mysterious and charming as ever, offering little more than a few enticing words. I want to share something with you, Gabriel. Something beautiful.
He’d no idea where she was leading him – and, hell, it didn’t matter. He would follow her anywhere.
He stole a glance at her, and his heart hammered with mounting anticipation. Moonlight bathed her del
icate features and set her hair ablaze. Eyes swollen and cheeks tracked with tears, she’d spent the past three days in mourning. Her cloak’s hood was drawn up and securely in place; the dark material framed her face like a portrait.
“Are we quite there yet, ma chérie? I must say – the suspense is nearly killing me.”
Her gaze flickered with amusement at his wayward glance. Then Gabriel’s entire body grew taut at the mischievous glint in her eyes.
“Don’t you know?” she replied. “Anticipation is half the pleasure.”
Those words pumped through his veins and set him on fire. As if realizing the implications of her statement, she blushed and quickly averted her gaze. Desire mounted inside his chest and rushed to his groin. He ached to crush Ariah’s sweet body against his chest, drag her into the nearby shadows, and devour her like a starved man.
She continued to tread forward in silence. A blast of wind raked through the surrounding trees and monuments. The road ahead was doused in shadow yet alive with transient beams of light.
The narrow alleyway soon gave way to a boulevard. Smiling wide, Ariah hiked up her skirts and raced over to the side of a building. Her laughter echoed, swelling and brightening the dank atmosphere, while a girlish smile lit her face. Gabriel tucked both hands inside his greatcoat and returned her smile. A wooden ladder lined the building’s wall, its slim frame soaring into pure darkness.
“Come on now, Gabriel!” Grinning over her shoulder, Ariah grasped onto the ladder and ascended into the black lacquered sky.
•
The frail lights of Paris winked against an endless horizon. Ariah breathed in the crisp winter night and wandered over to the rooftop’s edge. A brief image of Geoffrey earning sous as a chimney sweep cut through her mind. She pushed away the thought and drank in her tranquil surroundings.
The view was as magnificent as she remembered it to be – even more so with Gabriel at her side. The moon floated high and proud, a white orb against blackness, illuminating everything beneath its protective aura. Down below, the lights of Paris sparkled like so many constellations.
Finding Gabriel Page 28