by Lisa Cardiff
“Whatever,” she responded, staring blankly as Cam grabbed her clothes from the drawers and tossed them into her blue hard shell suitcase that Alec bought her last Christmas.
“Go. You’re wasting time,” Cam said after a few minutes.
“Fine.” She started walking toward the bathroom, stopping when she reached the door. “Why are you helping me?” she asked.
“Because you need help,” he answered, tilting his head to the side as if that were the dumbest question he’d ever heard and maybe it was.
“But you hate me…and last night…” She paused not sure how to describe what happened, especially with her mind still partially hazy from several shots of tequila. She exhaled loudly. “Last night you were mad about what happened between us on the dance floor.” She looked away quickly before she had a chance to see his facial expression. She didn’t want to see the disgust she feared might be there.
Cam walked to the closet next to the bathroom. “I don’t hate you—not even close. And I wasn’t mad at you.” He grabbed a few dresses hanging in the closet that she tossed in her bag at the last minute thinking she might need to dress up at some point during the month.
“Really?” she asked. Her voice sounded hoarse, anemic and a little bit needy. She didn’t like it one bit.
He stopped in front of her, cupping her face with his free hand. “Last night, I was mad at myself for taking advantage of you when you were drinking and I said some dumb shit afterwards. I’m sorry. It wasn’t my finest moment, but I really haven’t had many of those lately as you already know.”
His thumb whispered along her bottom lip, his eyes drugging her with their intensity and igniting shivers along every nerve ending in her body. “It won’t happen again. It will be our secret.”
She nodded unable to answer. He responded exactly as she would have hoped, but her stomach knotted uncomfortably and she felt…empty. Did the disappointment show on her face, in her eyes? Her mind told her to smile and be happy, but her body wanted her to drop to her knees begging for one more moment with him because she’d never experienced anything like that before last night. Her ex-boyfriend had hardly aroused any reaction in her, even when the relationship was shiny and new. Cam, on the other hand, made her feel everything with an intensity that stole her breath and melted her soul.
“Tay,” he said, his voice soft.
Normally, she hated that nickname and she only allowed her brother to use it, but she loved the way it rolled off of his lips, as if the simple syllable was dipped in warm amber colored honey. He devastated her willpower and common sense with that one syllable.
“Yeah?” she murmured, her body angling toward him involuntarily, and bringing their lips within striking distance.
He looked so sexy standing there with his messy blond hair and his perfectly sculpted face that she had to touch him. Cautiously, she placed her hand on his forearm, wanting to feel the slide of his skin beneath hers. When he didn’t retreat, she lazily traced the contours of his arm, to his shoulder, finally stopping at his neck where she felt his pulse pounding against her fingertips.
“Tell me to leave,” he mumbled lifting his long lashes, his blue eyes darker than normal and filled with an unspeakable gentleness and a whole lot of lust.
She shook her head. “Don’t leave,” she whispered. For some reason, she needed this moment with him, even though everything about him was bad for her. Sliding her hand to the back of his neck, she guided his head toward hers until their foreheads touched. Desire rolled off his skin burning into her and she decided she needed this more than anything—a good memory to chase away all the bad ones endlessly taunting her.
“Kiss me,” she said moistening her lower lip, remembering the feel of his silky lips molded against hers and needing to feel it again. She loved those lips. They made her forget everything.
He looked conflicted as he stared at her for an agonizingly prolonged minute. “No,” he whispered, but he took a few steps toward her until her back pressed into the doorjamb. His body aligned with hers in a way that made clear how much he actually wanted her. The heat from his body seeped into her bones, making her feel alive for the first time in years or maybe longer than that.
“Yes,” she whispered rocking her hips very slightly against his, testing the feel of his body against hers.
He groaned, but then he closed his eyes, inhaling deeply. “Tay, don’t do this. I’m not good at saying no. We both know it. That’s why you’re here.”
“Then don’t start trying now, because I don’t want to be good either. Not today. Let me have this,” she half-whispered. Opening his eyes, he lifted his forehead from hers, tilting his head toward the ceiling. She was prepared to beg. “It’s just a kiss, one more kiss. That’s all I want.” Her voice broke on the last word.
He nodded. “Okay, just one,” he said, his blue eyes reaching into hers and tugging on her soul.
“Oh my God,” she mumbled incoherently as his lips met hers. The feel of his lips against hers was even better than she remembered: warm, soft and pliable. As her lips parted, she realized that she had never really been kissed before, not like this, where her body caught on fire with every passing second and the world narrowed to the two of them. Life shouldn’t deprive anyone of this feeling of absolute connection and perfection. A kiss like this should be on every bucket list.
Within seconds, the dresses Cam had been holding tumbled to the floor, and her hands laced through his hair, pulling him closer to her, seeking more of the intimate kiss she craved in every cell of her body. He tasted too good. He felt too good. Just one kiss wouldn’t be enough.
His hand circled her waist and then dipped into the top of her skirt, teasing the soft skin below her navel, back and forth until her knees were ready to buckle and she couldn’t focus on anything except his fingertips on her bare skin. Frantically, she arched into him, practically begging him to move his hand lower to pacify the ache pulsing in her core.
He chuckled against her lips. “You’re getting greedy,” he said moving his mouth to her neck, nipping and scoring her tender skin with his teeth. “Just one kiss. That’s all I promised, remember?”
“No,” she whimpered. “A little more.”
“What do you need?” Cam asked, his hand dipping so close to where she wanted it, but way too far. She should step away and end this before it exploded in her face like so many other things in her life, but she couldn’t, not now. He was right. She was greedy. Cam made her greedy.
“Touch me,” she demanded winding her leg around his body.
“I am,” he answered, his hand moving even lower, grazing her wet entrance, sliding back and forth.
Lightheaded and overwhelmed, her head fell back against the doorjamb. “Not enough. Just do it,” she moaned low in her throat, her body hot and trembling and already beginning to convulse with the need to be filled. This was crazy. He was barely touching her and her body was humming with desire, dying to feel his touch. It felt almost decadent, the way her body responded to him.
Then, without warning, he thrust his finger deep inside of her and she screamed, immediately spiraling over the edge. As his finger slid in and out of her, she rocked her hips against his hand riding the wave of her orgasm to completion. He had some seriously talented fingers, but anyone with eyes knew that from the way his fingers moved over the strings of his guitar and today she was the lucky recipient of that talent. She wanted to experience more of those talented fingers.
A few minutes later, he withdrew his hand and her head fell against his chest. He lifted her, circling both of her legs around his hips. She had always prided herself at being adept at resisting temptation of any sort, but she had failed twice now with Cam. Apparently, she wasn’t well equipped to resist temptation of the Cam variety.
“Where are we going?” she asked, her head feeling too heavy to lift from his chest. She inhaled his woodsy masculine scent letting it fill her lungs. He smelled better, more intoxicating than any human she’
d ever met.
He sat her down on the edge of the tub, tracing the thin skin on the side of her neck with his fingertip and her stomach jumped excitedly. “You’re going to shower and I’m going to finish packing your things.”
“No,” she said, her voice needy and embarrassing as she pulled on his shirt. “Stay. We’re not done yet. I need…something.”
He braced his hands on the tub on either side of her, brushing his moist lips along her ear. “Yes. You need a shower. You don’t have time for anything else. We have to be on the bus in fifteen minutes.”
“Are you sure?” She leaned into him dreamily. “The bus won’t leave without you.”
He chuckled and she felt the movement of his lips against her ear. The sound of his light laugh pierced her heart almost if cupid himself had shot her with his love drunk arrow. “Yes. Take your shower and I’ll grab your bags and wait for you on the bus.”
She released her hands from his shirt, and even though she knew it didn’t make sense, she felt abandoned and used. Oh God, she was one of those girls. She nearly moaned out loud at the reality of the situation. One not so little orgasm and she couldn’t control herself from clinging to Cam with stars in her eyes. No one—most definitely not Cam—wanted a clingy lover. She had really sunk to a new low. Standing up, she stared at her reflection in the mirror. She didn’t recognize the girl staring back at her with flushed cheeks, swollen lips, raggedy breath and wildly tangled hair.
Cam stepped behind her, pressing his chest into her back, his fingers digging into her hips. Smiling wickedly, he planted a hard kiss on the side of her neck. “When you look like that, I’m tempted to beg you not to shower, but then other guys would see you like this and get all sort of ideas, and I’m not willing to share; not today.” He ran his nose along the side of her neck and goose bumps scattered along her arms and across her collarbone. “See you soon,” he said lightly biting her earlobe before he walked out of the bathroom and shut the door behind him.
She dropped her head into her hands. She was so screwed.
CHAPTER SIX
Cam handed Taylor’s luggage to some roadies lingering outside the bus. He was so fucked—even more than usual. Alec would kill him if he even suspected what happened last night or this afternoon with his sister. Hell, so would Jax and Marcus.
When he stepped onto the bus, Jax, Alec and Marcus were sitting at the small rectangular table across from the sleek galley kitchen.
“Where’s Tay?” Alec asked standing up to look over Cam’s shoulder. “She hasn’t answered any of my texts this morning. Have you seen her?”
“I just grabbed her luggage from her room. She said she’d meet us on the bus in a couple minutes.” Cam stretched out on the brown leather sofa positioned at the front of the bus. Other than the cramped sleeping bunks, Cam didn’t mind staying on the bus when the band traveled. It was nicer than any place he had lived before the band was signed.
“You were in her room?” Alec asked opening the refrigerator and pulling out a bottle of water. He tapped the bottle against his leg watching Cam.
“Yes.” Cam crossed his ankle over his other leg. “That’s the deal, right? She’s my babysitter for the remainder of the tour. I go wherever she goes and vice versa.”
“Hey,” Taylor said softly as she stepped onto the bus. Her hair was still damp and her face was bare. She looked a lot softer and more approachable without makeup. Cam decided he liked her that way, not that she didn’t take his breath away normally.
“Did you sleep late?” Alec asked.
“Yeah. I guess I was tired and I lost track of the time,” Taylor answered sitting down next to Cam, her leg brushing against his. He wanted to wrap his arm around her shoulder and pull her flush against his side, but that wouldn’t happen today or any day in the near future. The guys couldn’t find out what happened between them.
“Are we ready to go?” Marcus said walking to the front of the bus to peer into the driver’s seat.
“Yep,” Jax said shuffling a deck of cards.
“Where’s Bre?” Cam asked.
“On the other bus,” Jax answered. “She’s painting today and she doesn’t want to be interrupted. She kicked me out.”
“She’s like that,” Cam laughed, but it sounded bitter. He remembered how secretive she was about painting or sketching. Wistfully, he wished he didn’t remember that or a million other quirks about her, but it was too late for wishes. Tarnished memories or not, Bre’s habits, likes and dislikes were burned into his brain. Life sucked that way sometimes.
Marcus and Alec sat down at the table again. “Are you in?” Marcus asked, gesturing toward Cam.
“What are you playing?” Cam leaned forward looking at the stack of chips spread across the table.
“Poker. Texas hold ‘em.”
“Nah, maybe later.” He didn’t think he could concentrate with Taylor in the room, not with his mind still spinning from what happened in her hotel room and his fingers still burning to touch her.
Leaning back, Cam stretched his legs out in front of him and tipped his head to the ceiling. With her taste still on his tongue and her scent swirling around him, beckoning him to touch her, he felt as if he were losing his mind. He closed his eyes, trying to forget that she sat next him, but then his mind zeroed in on every soft breath leaving her mouth and he started envisioning everything he’d like to do with her. No, this wouldn’t work. He couldn’t sit there feigning indifference. In a few more minutes, he’d shove her down on the sofa and finish what they started earlier; Alec, Jax and Marcus be damned.
Cam jumped up. “I’m going to watch a movie.” The guys didn’t say anything as he passed their table, but he could feel Taylor’s eyes singeing the skin on his back.
He passed the bathroom and the stacked bunks on either side of the bus, making his way to the rear. Unlike other tour buses that had a bedroom in the rear, this one had an L-shaped sofa and a flat screen television. Jax and Bre had their own bus so the guys opted for another lounge space rather than a private bedroom.
Cam laid down on the sectional and flipped on the television, finally settling on a violent action-adventure, hoping it would keep his mind off anything related to Taylor, the softness of her skin, the sounds she made when he touched her.
Unfortunately, ten minutes into the movie, he noticed Taylor hovering near the entrance of the lounge area. “Can I join you?” she asked timidly.
He wanted to say no; he needed to say no. But he couldn’t do it—not when she looked vulnerable and unsure as though she didn’t think he wanted her. Wanting her wasn’t the problem. Cam patted the spot on the sofa next him. “Sure, but I don’t think you’ll like my movie choice.”
“Anything is better than watching the guys play poker.” Taylor pulled the curtain between the lounge area and the front of the bus shut.
Cam wanted to tell her to leave it open, but he stopped himself. Opened or closed—it didn’t matter. He couldn’t touch her either way. She sat next him and neither of them said anything as they stared at the television. Cam could feel the tension building around them and it made him edgy. Maybe this was the reason he avoided relationships. Inviting someone into your life was too complicated, too much work. Being with Bre was easy because they’d know each other since they were kids. As pathetic as it sounded, since her, he hadn’t bothered get to know any of the women who passed through his life. They were just a means to an end.
“Did I do something wrong?” She placed her hand on his knee.
He rubbed his temples. He wasn’t ready to talk about what happened between them or what it meant because he didn’t understand it himself. “No.” He lifted the remote and started flipping through the channels.
“Then why won’t you look at me?”
He turned to look at her. “I’ve looked at you.”
“Barely, and you couldn’t get away from me fast enough a few minutes ago.”
“Taylor…” he exhaled loudly searching his mind for the righ
t words to say. “You need this job, right?”
Her eyes widened and she froze. “Yes.”
“And I need to stay out of trouble for the rest of the tour.”
“That’s the plan.” Her face shuttered and he couldn’t tell what she was thinking. He didn’t want her to be mad or hurt.
“Right…so whatever happened between us probably wasn’t the best way make those things happen.”
She tried to stand up, but he grabbed her hand, preventing her from leaving. “Let go,” she said through clenched teeth. “I get it. I was available, and you took what I offered. You don’t need another complication in your life right now. No further explanation is needed.”
“No, you don’t get it.” He leaned toward her and kissed her hard on her lips. She didn’t respond and he felt a rush of anger, disappointment and confusion. His emotions were all over the place. She made him crazy. He grabbed her chin. “Forget what you’re thinking right now, because whatever it is, you’re wrong.”
“Okay, why don’t you try to explain so I do understand?” she demanded, her voice dripping with sarcasm.
“I didn’t think I would like you, but I do.” He rested his elbows on his knees and braced his head in his hands.
“And that’s a bad thing?” she asked, shaking her head.
“Yes and no.” He glanced at her from the corner of his eye. She took his breath away with her dark hair and delicate features, so strong and fragile at the same time.
“Okay,” she said, one side of her lips curving up in a lopsided smile. “Don’t strain yourself, but you can keep explaining.”
“If you weren’t Alec’s sister and the label didn’t hire you to keep track of me over the next month, it might be a good thing.”
“I agree. The timing is wrong, but I’m not worried about Alec. He won’t be a problem.”
“You’re not?” he said smirking as he lifted his head. “Because he kind of scares me when he’s mad, and he’s really protective of you.”