by Susan Thomas
"I didn't..."
"Yes you did. You must have had the window open because you'd not hear through those walls. I know, I helped put them in. So you spanked yourself. It shows you're taking this all seriously, and that's great, but relax. I'm not going to start whaling your butt for every little fault. Just take it one small step at a time. You may never be a Marion. She needs a good hard spanking fairly regularly, as far as I can see, but domestic discipline is not only about spanking. The third beer issue tonight was also domestic discipline. I said, 'No' and you swallowed hard but took it. One day only and you're doing just great. Relax. You know you're perfect for our sort of arrangement."
"Why? Is it because I am obedient?"
"No, because you are strong. You have a strong determined character. I have too. Domestic discipline takes strength. Never think otherwise. We both need to be strong."
Chapter 3
I stayed with Bill and Marion until our wedding. In just three weeks everything was organised. A lovely wedding dress was made for me with a bridesmaid's dress for Lily. I know she was way too young for a bridesmaid but she was delightful. Marion was matron of honour. I could have invited old friends from England or New York but honestly the distance, and the explanations involved, would have been far too much.
In that time, I began to feel strongly that my decision was right. Sam was a lovely man. Being with him made me feel strangely warm and safe. He wasn't like an accountant; he had an oddly outdoor feel about him... like a man who spent all day in the wild staring into the distance. The 'correction' side still scared me because I had never been disciplined like that even as a child. There was also something else that appealed to me about Sam. He had that same honest integrity that my father had together with that same concern for others. He was not someone that would ever pass by on the other side; he would always be the Good Samaritan.
The wedding took place in the community's own chapel. Oh, don't think it was some weird sect like affair because it wasn't. The community's pastor was an ordained minister of a much wider church with a great many members. The vow I took at my wedding would have shocked my old friends. I vowed to submit to my husband's headship in our marriage and to obey and serve him. That is about as politically incorrect as it comes but it was a legitimate choice among several openly offered by the church authorities. Our honeymoon would be brief in a sense. We were to have two nights on our own and then Lilly would come and join us. We were going to take her to a theme park with activities suitable for her young age.
As we left for the quiet hotel where we would spend our two nights I had two worries. The first was just how I was going to react when Sam first decided to correct me. I have always struggled with submission to authority. Part of me wants to but another part wants to fight back, to assert myself. On top of that I was frankly scared at how much a spanking correction would hurt. As an obedient wife I would, of course, have to submit to whatever Sam decided. The other worry was sex.
Of course I had sexual experience: fifteen different partners, when I thought back, although some of those had not lasted long. All the early ones had been unpleasant affairs, messy and unsatisfying. Some of the others had been OK but I always felt it was more about the man than me. One had been very proud of his technical expertise and his ability to give a woman multiple orgasms. He certainly gave me multiple orgasms but I always felt I was a demonstration model; that in his mind he was addressing a large audience and saying, 'See how I do this; copy me and you too can be successful in bed'. It was all about him and I was just... well you know. So I wasn't expecting much but it isn't fair to marry and deny your husband that pleasure. I promised myself I would be available when he needed it and I would pretend it was great.
Sam had booked us a suite at a really nice hotel. He had our bags taken up ahead of us and I wasn't sure why but I found out when we got to our door. He opened the door and then without warning swept me up into his arms. I squealed with surprise and shock at how effortlessly he had done it.
"What are you doing?"
"Carrying you across the threshold of course," he said and proceeded to do just that.
He kicked the door shut behind him and without effort carried me to the bedroom and the very large bed. He laid me down very carefully and then began kissing me. It's hard to describe being kissed but what he did was both tender and gentle as well as being incredibly sexy and passionate. I felt myself responding in a way I had never done before. I made as if to undress myself but he stopped my hands completely.
"That's my job Mrs Alden."
Sam began to undress me. Saying it like that demeans the reality: it was an erotic dance as he removed each article making my whole body eager for his touch. When I was finally naked he didn't undress himself. Instead, he began to use his mouth and fingers... so gentle, so sensitive and yet so shockingly arousing. I could feel myself heading for a huge orgasm but he suddenly commanded, "Not until I tell you!"
No one had ever done that to me before and I lay there struggling to control my orgasm as he aroused me to screaming point. Finally, he told me I might come and then used his tongue in a final flicker that sent me screaming and arching my back. I lay back on the bed drained for the moment and amazed at what he had done. While I lay there he undressed slowly.
Sam has an amazing body, lean and muscular but without bulk. I reached out and touched him. This was my husband. It was hard to believe how it had come about. Even his own undressing was erotic or at least to me it was. His erection was huge. He was so stiff and hard I couldn't help myself. I leaned down and put him into my mouth. I had no intention of making him come because I wanted him to come inside me but he must have been very close anyway. I only had that wonderful penis of his in my mouth a short while when I felt him beginning to come. He groaned deeply and held my head while I made sure he got the full treatment.
I was a little surprised, but pleased, that after he had finished he remained just as hard and erect. He pushed me back on the bed and slowly... oh my, how slowly... he entered me. It was amazing. I wanted to scream, 'Do it quickly'. It was almost torture, but beautiful torture, as the hardness moved into me. No sooner had he entered me fully he pulled out again. I grabbed his shoulders and protested but he whispered, "Relax. This is for you." He used his shaft to torture me... wonderful torture, that had every nerve in my body at crisis point. Finally, finally he entered me and began to ride me as I had never been ridden before.
It was just so many things: slow, loving, erotic, powerful, masterful. I can't begin to explain just how wonderful it was to be ridden like that. I felt my legs rise high and began heading for a powerful orgasm but again he whispered, "Wait!" I could barely stand the feelings that were scalding through my body when suddenly he shouted "It's time," and began to pound into me as I have never been pounded before. I went into the stratosphere. I screamed and wrapped myself around him as a huge orgasmic wave pulsed through my body. I was vaguely aware of him pumping his semen deep into me. Finally, our storms passed but still we clung to each other. It took a long while for us to separate.
We had been given a complimentary bottle of champagne by the hotel and now Sam went to pour it. He gave me a glass but I just put it to one side. He sat up in the bed drinking his and I lay down beside him and nestled into him. He put his arm around me and we stayed like that a long while, neither of us saying a word but somehow telling each other a great deal. I'd never done that after making love. In fact, I now realised I'd never made love before. I'd only ever had sex. I felt that something had happened to me in that time we had consummated our marriage. I was a different person.
Before I had been... what had I been? I wasn't sure but I had been consumed with the need to achieve, always striving to do better than anyone else, eaten up with the need to be best. That had ended with Anne's phone call but after that I had been lost, simply coping with the situation. Now I felt I was home. Sam was holding me tenderly and I was home.
---oOo---
We
only had two nights on our own before Lily would be brought to join us but I think it was just as well. I lost track of how many times we made love and I do mean make love. I had often felt used, or using, before; but now with Sam... we gave each other pleasure and intense pleasure at that. We did leave our hotel room to eat. We even went out and walked and went to the pool and swam but I couldn't tell you much about that at all. It was the love making I enjoyed and thought about. Even just lying with him afterwards was lovely. I wondered if my very different feelings were anything to do with being married or perhaps my vow to be obedient.
It was in our second evening of married life that I got my first taste of being corrected. We were getting dressed to go to dinner and I was dressing up. I had a bottle of rather expensive perfume in my hand and I dropped it. Now it didn't break, and of course only a few drops came out, but I reacted badly. I shouted, "Oh buggering-fuck!"
'Buggering-fuck' was something my first boyfriend at university 'taught' me. It was his favourite expression and I lapped it up. My brother and parents did not swear and I had not done so at home. However, away from home it all seemed rather exciting and daring and I began to use foul language constantly. In my working life as well the language around me was ripe to say the least. No one gave it much thought and I thought nothing of it now, for a few seconds that is.
"Sally!"
I turned in surprise and then saw from his face he was shocked. "Oh sorry," I muttered.
"Come here and stand in front of me."
Now I was shocked. I realised, and it made my heart thump, that Sam was displeased and I was in trouble. It took a real effort to do as I was told. "Look I'm sorry. I got used to saying that sort of thing at university and work was even worse if anything."
"Do you use that sort of language in front of children?"
"No! No, of course I don't."
Then he revealed his trap. "So it is something you can control. If you can control it in front of children, you can do so at all times. You are never to use that language again."
I can't tell you how hard it was not to argue with him, not to ridicule what he was saying and just take my telling off. Somehow I managed it. Then I grew frightened for he said, "Now I must decide on an appropriate correction."
One day of marriage and it had come to this already. Of course I could resist. I could fight him. I could even walk away but what was the point of the marriage if I did that? What he said next surprised me.
"I'm not sure that spanking you is the right thing to do. It is our honeymoon and this is the first time you've needed correction. Don't misinterpret my decision as weakness but I think corner time will do for this occasion. I want you to go and stand in that corner for fifteen minutes. You will stand still and quiet while you think about what has led you there and how you will stop this habit."
Now I found doing as he said very hard. Perhaps you would not but I was a grown woman and had used the 'naughty corner' with my three-year-old niece. It took a huge mental effort to move myself into the corner and face it as he instructed. I had no intention of thinking about the issue. He may have told me to do it, but he couldn't read my mind, so I rebelled and thought I'd retain a little independence. Unbidden the thoughts came anyway. I thought about my dad and how he hated swearing. My brother and mum too had loathed it. I thought about all my behaviour over the years and the things my parents and brother had disliked: the swearing, drinking, cocaine and my occupation. They worked for the community... my brother was studying to become a minister of religion. They must have hated my job which thought nothing of people and only of money. They must have hated my behaviour. I suddenly felt the terrible disappointment they must have all felt in me. especially my dad. I had gone against everything he believed in. I began to cry silent tears.
The tears would not stop. I felt such terrible guilt about my parents. I had loved them yet I had hardly ever seen them in those last years. I loved my brother. He'd never once bullied me as so many older brothers do. He'd always been lovely to me. I sobbed at how he must have felt about me. Soon my tears were no longer silent and I was wracked by loud sobs. Suddenly Sam was there and his arms were around me.
"Tell me." He was so gentle and heaven knows how he made out what I was saying but somehow he did.
"Sally, your parents loved you. Your brother loved you. They weren't disappointed in you. Maybe anxious about the course your life was taking but not disappointed. Anyway what happened when they were killed? You gave everything up and stepped in. You took it all on. You cared for your sister-in-law and the children. You sorted out all the financial affairs. You did not say, 'Oh, I can't I'm too busy. I can't deal with this'. No parent, no brother, could possibly be disappointed in your response."
When I had finished crying and snuffling I went to go back in the corner, all resistance and rebellion gone, but he stopped me. "I don't think there is a need to finish it. The point has been made. Wash your face and re-do your make-up then let's go to dinner."
At dinner I thought how reassuring that incident had been. Sam had remained calm and gentle throughout. He'd not spanked me but had been, as he promised at the beginning, moderate and proportionate. By the time dinner was over I was feeling so randy it was hard to contain myself. I felt daring in the lift up to our room and reaching up under my dress pulled my knickers off. It was not something I had ever done before in my life. I wondered if Sam would be shocked but he grinned and reacted as I hoped. We got in the door and, after kicking it shut, he grabbed hold of me lifted me up and put my back against the wall. I held on to him tightly and suddenly he was inside me and thrusting away hard. It was amazing. He was a stallion... a bull... and I just clung to him and screamed with the exquisite pleasure he was giving me.
Later we made love again. I had never felt like this about sex before. Was it Sam, the marriage or the whole domestic discipline thing? I didn't know but whatever it was it was working for us.
We went to pick up Lily the next day. She came running up to me and for the first time called me 'Mommy'. I think Sam was a little puzzled because she hadn't actually done that before our marriage but I understood. In her three-year-old mind she had prayed for a pretty and kind mommy but I had told her I couldn't be her mommy until I had married her daddy. Well now I was married so I was her mommy. Simple logic.
I have to be honest I struggle to say 'mommy'. It always comes out in my British 'mummy'. Lily struggles to say 'mummy' but they are so close we understand one another without problem.
We had a lovely time with Lily at the theme park but having a family room certainly puts a brake on your sex life and we both felt it. Lilly never doubted that I was her mum and I very quickly came to love her as my daughter. I'm not saying she is always as good as gold. What child is? She has her moments and I find I have turned into my mother. I stand with my hands on my hips saying in a cross voice, "Lily Alden, that was not how good girls behave. You must sit in the naughty corner now. I don't want a sound from you for three whole minutes." Well she'll sit and glare at me for a while but soon she'll be crying and then when time is up we'll make up and she'll promise to be good... which she will be, for a while.
---oOo---
When we got back to the community, and what was now my home, we found the builders had completely finished remodelling the kitchen and bathrooms. They'd also redecorated our bedroom and the community had put our furniture in and sorted everything out for us. It was a lovely welcome back.
I got stuck straight into being a wife and mother. Before you say a word about lack of fulfilment or something... forget it. I was happy then and I'm happy now. I don't know what it says about me and honestly I don't care. I had made my choice quite freely and I liked it. The first thing I did was move Lily into one of the spare rooms so we could sort her room out. Sam was a great dad but Lily was still in one of those baby cot-beds and the room was still a baby room. Heavens, the man had even left the baby changing mat in there. Sam gave me a budget for the rest of the house inclu
ding Lily's room and I apportioned it out for the various rooms. It meant Lily could have a proper little girl room without overindulgence or show-house stupidity. Lily helped choose what she wanted and once we decided the decorators made short work of her room and we moved her new furniture in. I arranged for her to have some of her little friends around for a reopening party. Brave wasn't I!
I then started on the family room and it was that that earned me my first serious correction. I decided we'd move the furniture first, before decorating, to see in practice how it worked out. I did a scale plan of the room, with little scale cardboard pieces for the furniture and moved them around until I had something I thought would work.
Sam gave it his approval and then said, "Now, that furniture is old and heavy. I'll get some of the guys to help me move it on Saturday."
"Don't worry I can do it while you're busy."
"No Sally. That stuff is heavy. To move it on your own would be dangerous. You might have it fall on you or strain a muscle or anything. I'll get the guys to help. You're not to touch it. Do you hear me?"
Well I heard alright but it was only Tuesday and I wanted to get on with it. I am quite strong for my size and I felt I could do it with a bit of effort. Sam often worked in a little office at home but he also had to go out to see clients where they were. On the Wednesday off he went. Lily was in play school (which she loved) and I began furniture moving. I am not kidding it was much harder than I imagined. That furniture, even with the contents out and in the garage, was heavy. By the time I finished every muscle was at screaming point and I ached all over, but I did it.
When Sam came home I stood proudly expecting praise. I didn't get it.
"Sally, what did I tell you about moving this furniture?"