Sally's Journey: ... into domestic discipline

by Susan Thomas

  They all smiled at me as I sat and Marion said, "Is that careful sitting down the act of someone that has just had their first corrective spanking?"

  "Last night."

  Bertha Abbadelli asked in a kindly way, "What did you do?"

  "Sam told me not to move some heavy old furniture on my own. He said he'd do it with some of his friends on Saturday."

  "But you went ahead and did it anyway." Bertha sounded very understanding. "So you got spanked for disobedience."

  "Yes, and it really hurt."

  They smiled at me and then Susan Joyce said something that really surprised me. "But now Sally, now, today, you feel really happy don't you. You feel at peace with yourself and with the world."

  I must have looked silly as I exclaimed, "How did you know?"

  They didn't answer but Bertha said, "Welcome Sally. You're one of us now."

  The community did not isolate itself. Apart from the medical, dentist and veterinary services that were available to others in the wider community there were people like Sam that worked far and wide. Also the community helped the poor and needy in different ways. One way was a sort of meals-on-wheels' service. State cutbacks combined with a rural area meant voluntary help was needed. A community kitchen made meals that were frozen and taken out twice weekly. The twice weekly was because some of the people receiving them only saw the volunteer and it was a good way of checking they were OK. Bertha, Susan, Kath and Marion wanted me to be one of those doing the delivering twice weekly. I was happy to do it.

  I didn't start that day but I did spend a lot of time finding out how it all worked and being given a route to follow. I was warned I had some weird ones on my list.

  "Mrs Rafferty is very strange. She is elderly and we keep an eye on her. Now there is Old Jack. None of the other volunteers will go to him now because he is so rude to them. Can you handle rude because he really does need the food?"

  I assured them I could and when I did start the next day I found how right they were. I pulled up outside Mrs Rafferty's place. There was an elderly woman outside her front door looking anxious. As I walked up the woman turned to me and without preamble said, "Have you seen Yvonne? I'm very worried about her."

  I assumed Yvonne was Mrs Rafferty. "No I haven't, I've only just arrived. But don't worry they've given me a key to her house just in case she is ever taken ill." I let myself in calling out for Mrs Rafferty and getting no reply. The house was silent and I began to be very worried. I had looked in the living room, but no one had been in there, now I went back and the elderly lady was sitting in a chair looking as if she belonged.

  "Who are you?" she demanded.

  "I deliver the meals. I'm new to it. Are you Mrs Rafferty?"

  "Of course I am."

  "Well, who is Yvonne?"

  "Yvonne! How do you know about her? She's been dead for years."

  That was fairly typical of my conversations with Mrs Rafferty but the strange thing is her house and person were always neat and clean. No one helped her, she did it all herself.

  Jack was very different. A thickset man who clearly had been very strong in his day, he opened the door when I knocked and growled, "Yeah?"

  "I'm delivering the meals."

  "Never seen you before. You got ID, woman?" I showed him my volunteers' badge. "You're a Limey."

  "I was born and brought up in Britain but this is my home now. I married here."

  "I don't trust Limeys. Why they send you?"

  I enjoyed my reply. "Because no one else would come to you, you've been so rude to them all."

  "Well leave the meals then."

  "You know I can't do that. I have to put them in the freezer and check it is at the right temperature. I've got to come inside to do that."

  "I don't want you in my house. Don't like Limeys."

  "Please yourself. It's your choice. Either I come in with the meals or I go with them. Up to you Jack."

  He let me in without a word and I checked his freezer. It was at the temperature but there were two meals left that were out of date. I took them out.

  "Them's my meals. You're not stealing my meals."

  "I'm not stealing; they are out of date. You've not eaten them."

  "Oh, they'll be Mac n' Cheese. Hate that."

  "Fine. I'll make a note and you'll not get that again."

  He looked at me as I put the meals in the freezer and then said aggressively, "So, will you be coming back?"

  "Sure, your rudeness doesn't bother me."

  He snorted and didn't thank me as I left. I was not to know how important it was to my family that I developed a good relationship with him. Anyway that was all to come.

  After a long chat with the four other wives I was shown around the community kitchens that prepared the meals to go out. Then I was given my rounds' lists. They were easy enough to follow just by programming a route into my Sat-Nav. I had of course bought a car in the weeks before my wedding. It was soon time to pick Lily up and I began to prepare the evening meal. I had bought a little apron for her and she perched up on a stool and 'helped' me. In truth I could have done the job faster on my own but I think it is important to teach children how to cook and look after themselves from an early age. She loved helping mommy and we chatted away while we worked. By the time we were done I was expecting Sam to show, but no Sam. I got the meal on but still Sam didn't come. It was now late for him, and the meal should really have been eaten, but he wasn't there and I began to get worried. Had something happened to him? Just then the phone rang and I went cold all over.

  I answered and it was Sam. "Now Sally I'm not hurt and I'm not in trouble." What a way to open a conversation. "However, I am at the Sheriff's. There's been an incident and I am a witness. I'll be a while yet. You'd best get on with eating and I'll have whatever I can when I get back."

  Lily was disappointed Daddy was to be late but we enjoyed the meal she had cooked! Later, and still no Sam, so I started the bedtime routines; again Lily was disappointed that Daddy wasn't home but all went smoothly and she was off to sleep fairly quickly. I poured myself some wine and sat doing nothing except worry about Sam. Finally, I heard his car outside and rushed to open the front door. He came in and hugged me tight. I sensed he needed me very much indeed so I held onto him until he was ready.

  I got him some food and he sat eating while telling me what happened. It wasn't a pleasant story. He had run very late at his client's and was in a hurry to get home. Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, too much bad coffee resulted in the need to make a call of nature so he pulled over and walked into some bushes. He'd just finished and was walking back to the car when he heard a woman screaming and shouting. He ran to find out what was going on and saw a strong young man attempting to... being blunt... rape a girl. Sam wasn't then sure of her age but he thought perhaps mid-teens but she turned out to be nineteen. The girl was begging him not to do it again and that she wouldn't tell if he just left her alone. Sam ran up and pulled the young man off. He was immediately attacked with considerable ferocity and he had to use his fists to knock him down. Sam called 911.

  While they waited he put his jacket around the girl, who was shaking and crying, and he could see that a rape had already occurred. What he had stopped was a second helping. Of course the young man was arrested and Sam went back to the Sheriff's to make a statement. That was when the young man's lawyer appeared. It turned out that he was none other than Everett Cannon, only son and heir to Garrett Cannon. Now even I, in my short time in the state, had heard of Garrett Cannon. The man owned factories, a couple of shopping malls, a good few apartment blocks, several hotels, a saw mill and heaven knows what else. He was rich, ruthless and determined and Everett was his spoiled rotten son.

  I could see immediately what the problem would be. You see it's hard for a girl to prove rape. He can cry, "It was consensual," and if it gets to court his lawyer can have a field day. OK so the young man is a womaniser, so what? He's young... young dog earns a bit of grudging ad
miration. She on the other hand has to be virgin pure because if there is the slightest hint of sex, even a risqué photograph, she will be shredded in court and he will walk, laughing.

  Now in Everett's case there wasn't just the girl there was Sam. The claim of consensual rough sex didn't play well with Sam there. Sam, the highly thought of accountant. Sam, the local man with a reputation for honesty and decency. Sam, the married man with a young daughter. Sam, the regular church goer. OK so Sam just went and wasn't a real believer... so what, the court wasn't to know. Sam would be there to tell a different story. I know what men like Garret Cannon are like. I sensed trouble ahead just not what or how.

  How the lawyer got Everett out on bail as fast as he did is a mystery to me but he did. I had no doubt that there was already a denigration campaign being set up to blacken the girl's name but the rich have always been like that. I decided that there wasn't much I could do except stand, like some line from a song, by my man.

  It did cross my mind just how different the attitude is towards to women and girls within the community. All the men, without exception, are extremely courteous and helpful to every woman they meet even if they don't know them. The boys (and there are lots of children) are taught by everyone to be protective and kind towards the girls. The kind of crude sexist attitudes you see elsewhere simply don't exist and yet you would think, given the domestic discipline nature of the set-up, that they would. As a woman I have never before felt safer, more at ease or comfortable.

  ---oOo---

  My next 'meals' visit was due and as it happened that day there was sickness among the staff that ran the playgroup. Sam suggested I just take Lily with me. I was a bit worried about people like Jack but I took his suggestion anyway. Lily was very excited and I made her promise to be very polite to all the ladies and gentlemen. I needn't have worried. Lily was very good and the people we went to were nice to her. Then we got to Jack's house and I was really quite anxious about his attitude. I was prepared for battle when I knocked the door.

  "Oh, it's you," he grumbled and then he spotted Lily. "Who's this?"

  "My daughter. There is no play school today." I know she is actually my stepdaughter but I really don't look at it like that.

  His voice was less of a snarl as he asked her directly, "What's your name?"

  "Lily."

  He went very still and a sort of strange silence settled on all of us. Lily just stared at him and I did too. Suddenly he moved, opened the door wide and in a very different voice invited Lily to come in. "Lily. Good name that. Say Lily would you like an apple?"

  "Yes please."

  "I'm sorry but she has her apples cut up for her. Do you want me-"

  "No, that's fine."

  He came back with a tray. On it was a nice plate with a most beautifully cut up apple, a little paper towel and a glass of milk. He had a table right by the window that overlooked the street and he sat Lily there. She thanked him gravely and began to eat and drink daintily. I was staring at him unable to believe the change in him. Then he turned to me.

  "Say, what's your name?"

  "Sally."

  "Want some coffee?"

  "That would be lovely. Thank you."

  He made some coffee and came back and then he stayed with Lily while I quickly put his meals away. When I came back he was showing her a photograph.

  "That's a pretty lady," Lily admired.

  "Do ya know what her name was?"

  Lily shook her head.

  "Her name was Lily too and she was just like you, a pretty girl. The prettiest girl in the whole county."

  "Where is she?"

  "She passed on years ago. I still miss her."

  Jack gave Lily an old photograph album to look at with lots of photographs of his Lily in it and then he sighed and looked out of the window. I don't know what he saw, and he has never said, but suddenly he turned to me. "You carry a gun, Sally?"

  "No. Never even handled one."

  "Has ya husband got guns?"

  "Yes, he has a gun cabinet with quite a few."

  "Get him to teach you soon."

  "Why?"

  "Attractive young woman like you driving around some of these lonely roads. You need a gun. I was a cop, I know. Now you mind what I say, Sally. Ya hear me?"

  Well I still had marks on my bum from my spanking and, although Jack wouldn't and couldn't do it, I wasn't in the mood for arguing. "I'll raise it this evening Jack."

  "Mind ya do, girl. Ya goin to bring Lily next time?"

  "If you'd like me to."

  Well he did and Lily hugged him when we left and to complete my astonishment he waved goodbye as we went down the road.

  I asked Sam about the guns that evening when Lily was asleep. He looked surprised but opened the gun cabinet and showed me his collection. They were mainly hunting rifles and shotguns with a couple of automatic pistols and a small revolver.

  "The revolver was Julie's. It's a Smith and Wesson 38 Bodyguard. Has a laser sight. It would be ideal for you if you don't mind something that belonged to Julie."

  "Sam, I'm not wiping Julie out of existence any more than my parents or brother. We loved them. We should remember them and talk about them naturally.

  "Jack wants me to learn. Can you teach me?"

  "I'd love to. Look, I can take a day tomorrow. How about that?"

  Chapter 6

  Sam was up early the next day to organise everything for my lesson. I had no idea just how big the piece of land was that went with the house. There must have been a couple of acres at least and it stretched along to the beginnings of the sides of the valley. I began to get ideas, when I saw it all, about growing fruit and vegetables. Ending at an earth bank Sam had marked out a sort of practice range. He'd done it for Julie but her health had been poor and it fallen into disuse and become a bit overgrown. By the time I got out there he'd cleared it and set everything up.

  I got a long lecture about how I was never to leave guns around in the house even unloaded ones; they must always be locked in the gun cabinet. He told me some frightening statistic about gun related accidents involving children and I promised to be very careful. Then I got lessons on gun safety, loading, unloading and cleaning. By the time he'd finished I was itching to actually fire one. He gave me the 38 special and told me to load it. I did and then I was given a very thorough lesson on how to fire it. I'm not going to claim to be a crack shot but by the time we finished, I could hit the target and with the laser sight do it quite well.

  Sam's hunting rifles were too big for me to manage though I did manage to load and fire one of his shotguns. When I showed an interest in going hunting he promised to buy me a rifle suitable for my size. He thought a .270 with a shortened stock would do and I was quite excited by the idea. Then I had to clean the guns I'd fired with Sam standing over me to check I did it properly.

  What happened came out of the blue. I was doing well, and earning Sam's approval for my thorough cleaning, when my hand knocked the can of solvent. The can toppled and, in that irritating way in which such things occur, hit the can of air which fell and in turn hit the bottle of gun oil and sent it skittering off the table. Not really a serious matter is it but I reacted with irritation. "Oh buggering-f..." I stopped myself saying it all and my hand flew to my mouth as I said, "Oh!" I turned to look at Sam and he was looking disapproving and stern. It was then that a change came over me.

  It was very quiet. No great internal music. No revelation. No blinding light. Nothing extraordinary but I knew I had changed. Before, I had merely been reacting to all the domestic discipline stuff. I had felt strongly, from the first moment I saw Sam's advert, that this was where I should be; but every tiny bit of domestic discipline freaked me and it was a struggle to go along with it. Now I knew I must be corrected, for I knew that swearing was unacceptable. Sam had made that plain and that wasn't how I was brought up either. I looked at Sam calmly and asked, "Should I finish cleaning these before you correct me?"

  He nodded l
ooking pleased at my attitude. I felt good inside about his approval and carried on cleaning the guns very carefully indeed. When all the guns were locked up, and the cleaning tools and materials put away, I washed and went and stood in front of Sam. I found I wasn't even trembling although my stomach had a large flock of butterflies at work.

  "Sally, I want you to remove all clothing below your waist and go and stand in the corner in the family room."

  I obeyed in a strangely calm way although I did feel nervous about what he was going to do. Even in my accepting state I didn't want a hairbrush spanking. I could see now what Bertha had really meant when she said, "You're one of us now."

  "Come here Sally."

  I turned, and at first was relieved to see Sam didn't have the hairbrush in his hand, then I saw the small white bar he had instead. I knew immediately it was soap and I knew what he was going to do with it. I'd seen it when I researched domestic discipline. I followed him with a sinking heart into the bathroom. He ran some water over the end of the bar and worked it around a bit with his fingers before turning to me. "Open wide." I did as I was told and he put the bar into my mouth and worked it gently around a little before saying. "Now bite down on it."

  It was weird biting into that soap. It's not like anything else you might bite into and already my mouth was full of a revolting taste where Sam had wiped the wet bar around my mouth. I tried not to let my tongue run over it but I couldn't stop it and the taste grew worse. I tried not to swallow but I did a bit and my mouth and throat began to tingle in a most unpleasant way. The nasty taste... bitter, cloying, tingling taste... spread everywhere and made my whole face screw up. I wanted to spit it out but this was part of my correction so I couldn't. I can't tell how long I had that soap in my mouth. Not long I think but it seemed an eternity.

  "Open again." With relief I opened my mouth and Sam removed the bar. "Spit into the basin but don't rinse."