by James, Leigh
Matthew was looking at John; John looked back at him calmly. “Of course you can come with us,” John said quietly. “I promised you.” Matthew glared at him. “Don’t look at me like that,” John said, a warning edge to his voice.
“Just because you can’t say no to her doesn’t mean we should put her in that kind of danger —” Matthew started, but John stopped him with a look.
“Enough,” John said. “That’s enough. I’m not going to let anything happen to her. You know that. I’ll carry her if I have to. She’s pretty light.”
“Of course I know that,” Matthew said, actually sounding halfway apologetic. “It’s just that we have to get him this time. Cruz is freaking out. And after seeing her in Mexico not that long ago, so beat up…” He let his voice trail off. John winced and I put my arms around him.
“And Mer wants me to get back ASAP. She’s freaking out, too.” He shook his head. “Hormones. Like you’ve never seen.”
“She loves you,” John said. “She’s just worried about you. It makes them do crazy things.” He inclined his head towards me and I frowned at him.
“You shouldn’t do all that stuff today. Don’t even try,” Matthew said to me. “You need to save your strength. Let’s just do our planned workout and get packed. I can give the presentation on the plane, if that’s okay.”
John nodded. “It’s gonna have to be okay,” he said. “Put Michael in charge of supplies. Tell him we need to be ready to leave by tomorrow mid-day, if possible. Have Kevin call Cruz to take care of the plane. Have him get everybody’s passports in order. He has to get a new express one for Liberty, so tell him to get that going first thing.”
Matthew stood up to go. “There’s one more thing,” he said, looking at me apologetically. “Ray showed up. In an alcohol and drug rehab facility. He made contact with our guy. He’d said he’d known he was following him for a long time.”
“What the fuck?” John said. “That guy is fired. As in, blackballed. Never going to work for anyone again, ever.”
“I know, I know,” Matthew said. “I already told him. The thing is, Ray is asking for something.”
I saw John turn pale. I wasn’t afraid of Ray anymore, not at all; I was only afraid of John’s reaction to Ray. I was only afraid that John was going to blow his head off someday, if he ever got the chance.
“What,” John said, and he didn’t bother asking it as a question.
“Money,” Matthew said. “Money for rehab and money to get back home. He asked for money to go to community college, too, since he swears he’s gonna quit dealing.” Matthew laughed and stopped immediately when he saw how pissed John was.
“He’s asking me for money,” John said, flatly.
“He told our guy he’d go to the press about you and your business. Blow your anonymity,” Matthew said. He had wisely chosen to start inspecting his nails instead of looking at John.
“I’m so sorry,” I said, looking at John, feeling myself turning bright red. Fucking Ray, I thought. He was like a bad penny. He just kept turning up. For a deadbeat, skinny drug dealer, he sure did cause a lot of trouble.
“Can I please kill him?” John asked in a pleading tone, turning to me. “Please?”
I shook my head, no, even though I was blushing with embarrassment and rage because I hated Ray so much. He turned back to Matthew. “Give him what he wants,” he said. “But tell him he’s being watched. If he goes back to dealing, or if he starts talking about me, I’ll be paying him a visit. Send Lou to watch him for now. And tell him not to fuck it up.”
Matthew nodded and headed off.
“Busy morning,” I said, under my breath.
He pulled me down onto his lap and buried his face in my hair. “I really would like to kill him,” John said softly. “Every time I think about —”
“Stop,” I said, quietly. “I know. But you can’t. You just can’t.” He held me for a minute longer, and we just took solace in each other, the storm of other people and their problems swirling around us.
“Brazil,” John said quietly. “It’s beautiful, but it’s going to be very dangerous. Darius will be expecting us. Are you sure you want to do this?”
I held up my engagement ring and looked at him. “We agreed not to be apart. Not ever again. I can’t let you go without me,” I said. “You go, I go.” Even though I know I’m being ridiculously selfish.
“Then let’s go have a protein shake and go running,” John said, sounding resigned. “Tomorrow, it will be dragging a back pack through a jungle.”
“The Brazilian jungle probably still beats my old apartment in Vegas,” I said.
“We’ll see,” John said and grimaced. “There are lots of spiders.”
“Small ones?” I asked squeakily, jumping up and following him towards the entryway.
“Some are small,” John said noncommittally. “We’ll learn more about them tomorrow on the plane.”
“Awesome,” I said.
“Totally,” he said.
Before he left for the airport, Ian pulled me aside. John was out at the barracks. “Liberty, Catherine left a note for you,” he said.
“For me?” I asked, incredulous.
“Call Eva,” he said.
“I’ll do it now,” I said, and kissed him quickly on the cheek. “Be safe, Ian. We’ll see you soon.” He smiled at me and was gone.
I called Eva from our room, so I could watch for John out the window.
“Liberty,” she said when she answered the phone. Her voice was thick with tears.
“Eva, I’m so sorry,” I said. “I don’t know what else to say.”
For a second she just sniffled on the other end of the line. Then she gathered her composure enough to speak again. “Catherine left a note for you. I went ahead and opened it. I’m sorry, but I had to know if it said anything that could help.”
“It’s okay,” I said, “I understand completely.”
“I’m afraid it’s not very nice,” Eva said and sighed.
“That’s okay, too,” I said. I held my breath and waited.
Dear Liberty, Eva read.
You know that I think you are an immature, poorly dressed, ridiculously naive girl. I also suspect that you were a mediocre exotic dancer at best. And you are engaged to my father, who is at least twice your age, and as you know I find that repulsive. You also shot me in the foot. I could go on and on, but I’ll get to the point. You bought me the face cream I asked for. You bought me Belvedere and you snuck that carton of cigarettes to me and didn’t tell John. You are not all bad. Please be advised that I will honor your request to keep the family updated to the extent that I can.
Don’t be surprised if you and John don’t hear from me. But don’t take it personally, either.
Very Truly Yours,
Catherine
“Huh,” I said to Eva. She just sniffled some more, and I didn’t blame her.
I texted Sasha before we left the next day. I wanted to call her, but I was worried about what I might blurt out about our trip.
“John and I are going on a trip…call you when we get back?”
“Lucky u,” she texted back immediately, even though it was five a.m. her time. “Hope u r going someplace fab and warm. Love you <3”
I smiled at her unknowing ball sack. Then I sighed a heavy sigh. Yes, we were going someplace fabulous and warm. But we weren’t going to the fabulous part. John had told me to only pack dark-colored clothing and no makeup, no civilian clothes. He’d actually purchased some camouflaged clothes for me; I packed them all.
“How are we getting our weapons in?” I asked.
“We aren’t,” John said. “We have to pick them up there. I know a guy.”
“Of course you do,” I said and laughed nervously. It was not lost on me that the man I was marrying knew weapons dealers and customs agents in just about every foreign country. I tried to look at the bright side: at least he was organized.
“Oh, and Liberty,” John said, gather
ing some of our stuff to bring downstairs, “don’t forget the bug spray.”
I found a spray bottle of bug spray in the bathroom on the counter. It was a kind I hadn’t seen before. It said “extra-strength” and “toxic” written all over it. And a picture of a bug. A very, very big bug.
“We’re flying into Campo Grande, near the Paraguay border,” Matthew told us later, while we were on the plane. John had hired a private plane to take us. I had no idea how much Cruz was paying him for the job, but it must have been exorbitant; we were offered champagne and warm face cloths, but everyone disappointedly declined, so I had to say no, too. They must have all flown with John like this before. He was all business right now; they must’ve known he wouldn’t approve.
“Campo Grande is urban. It’s got a population just shy of 800,000,” Matthew continued, putting up a picture on the plane’s multiple small screens. “It’s the last place Darius was spotted, meeting someone from his group. He keeps disappearing, though. So we think he might be staying out of town.”
He pointed to an area southwest of the city. “We might have to go out here,” he said. “It’s rainforest. It’s going to suck, but at least it’s not the rainy season.”
He looked at all of us, making sure we were paying attention. “I know we didn’t have as much time as we were hoping to plan this,” he said, “so our goal has to be to complete our assignment as quickly as we can. The city can be dangerous, but we have a building we can stay in that’s relatively safe. Not comfortable, but safe.”
He continued to look at us. “If we have to stay out in the forest, though — and we might, I really think he’s hiding somewhere out there, maybe in a safe house — we have to be extremely careful. Everyone has to use bug spray, and it’s mandatory to reapply every two hours. There’s malaria, yellow fever, all sorts of nasty stuff that you could pick up from the mosquitos. So bug spray is a must, and the kind we bought smells like shit, but it’ll keep you safe.
“Also, I hate to tell you, but there are a lot of snakes and spiders that we need to be wary off.”
I felt my skin prickle and my palms start to sweat. I really hated spiders. Mosquitoes were bad, snakes were disgusting, but spiders? Spiders were so much more than disgusting. They were scary. It was like god had designed them to make you scream when you saw them; scream and run away, to protect yourself. They were scary, icky, and in the worst case scenario, hairy. Just thinking about them made me cross my legs tight and emit little silent, grossed-out screams inside my head.
“Not all of the snakes and spiders down here are venomous, but we don’t have time to get immersed in the nuances of that,” Matthew said. “Treat them all like they’re your enemy. Run away from them. Shoot them. Whatever.”
Everyone started talking then, but John just quietly studied the map and I kept wiping my palms off on my jeans, hoping they would eventually stop sweating.
“We still don’t know who Darius is partnered up with. Cruz has some ideas, but as far as we’re concerned, it doesn’t really matter. We’re not getting more involved than our current assignment. We need to capture Darius and then contact Cruz for instructions.” Matthew and John looked at each other briefly. “At this point, we think that Cruz is just going to want him terminated. But he might have some questions first.”
Matthew shrugged and went back to talking about the territory where we were landing, but I tuned him out. Darius was not my favorite person, but we were going to kill him in cold blood. My palms started sweating profusely again. I looked at John, but he was staring thoughtfully at the map, reading something on his iPad, and reading text messages all at the same time. I nervously flipped through the leaflet Matthew had handed out. There were photographs of the city, which surprised me because of its skyscrapers and highways. Ignorant as I was about this part of the world, I was expecting something less civilized. But there were parks and gardens and fountains, all planned, urbane and sophisticated. There were pictures of the city at night, beautifully lit up.
Then I flipped to the next page. There were pictures of snakes, different types of insects, and spiders. Lots of spiders. Some were big and some were hairy. Some were big AND hairy. I leaned back in my seat and tried to do yoga breathing. Now this, I thought, was unfortunately exactly what I WAS expecting.
“You okay?” John asked, patting my hand gently.
I nodded at him, not wanting to give anything away. I didn’t expect John to baby me on this assignment; in fact, I would probably fall apart if he did. I put the fear out of my mind. I knew I was afraid, but I wasn’t going to let it rule me. I was going to use it to keep me sharp, keep me energized, keep me focused.
I made myself look back down at the pictures. The Brazilian Wandering Spider, I read, has a long body and the greatest body weight in its group…they can grow to have a leg span of six inches…they are called Wandering spiders because they wander the jungle floors at night…
I heard a high-pitched whine and I realized it was coming from me. I looked over and saw that John was watching me with a worried expression. I just shook my head at him. “I’m fine,” I whispered, coughing and clearing my throat. “I just think I need some water.”
He pulled a bottle of water out of his bag and handed it to me, then looked down at the open page on my lap. “You just need some water? That’s why you’re making weird noises, shaking and practically crying?” he asked, looking up at me from the spiders. There was a mixture of pity, frustration and love on his face.
“You know babe, they do have some nice hotels down here. We could stay at one. Matthew and the guys have this under control.” He reached over and grabbed my sweaty hand and squeezed it. “We don’t have to do this,” he whispered to me, conspiratorially. “We can bail. I’ll still get paid.”
I pulled my hand back, wiping it on my jeans, and shook my head at him. “I’m fine,” I said. “And I don’t want to separate you from the guys just because I’m a chicken. They need you. Just as much as I do.”
“I’ll be with you, every step of the way,” John said, closing his screens down. He took the papers from my lap and stuffed them into his bag, and then he leaned back and closed his eyes, pulling me to him. “Let’s get some rest now. We land in a few hours. I have a feeling we won’t be doing a lot of sleeping once we’re on the ground.”
It was hot and humid when we got off the plane, even though it was nighttime. “This is spring weather,” Jake was saying. “In a few months it’ll be 110 every day. So this is nothing.” There were seven of us total, five of us rode in the back of the somewhat beat-up van that John had gotten at the airport. Matthew was driving and John was with him up front. We drove through the downtown city streets in relative quiet; it was the middle of the night and we were in what appeared to be a business district, with office-like tall buildings and narrow parking lots.
“Keep the windows up,” Jake called to them from the back. “I did my research — I read my leaflet. Sometimes people get robbed at red lights.”
“Jake,” Matthew called from the front, “do you see anybody on the road but us?”
“No,” Jake said.
“Then shut up,” Matthew said. “Stop trying to be smart. It’s never going to work.”
Matthew and the rest of the guys cracked up at that, but I saw Jake’s face redden. He was young, and he was always ready to go, eager. Like a hound dog that had been kept on his leash too long, anxious to hunt and stretch his muscles.
“Brazil’s a beautiful country,” Matthew said, now sounding a bit like a schoolmarm. “Yes, if you’re some tourist wearing a fanny pack, you need to be careful. But we are not wearing fanny packs. We are not worried about getting mugged.”
“No, we are worried about getting shot by Darius or bit by big, hairy, wandering spiders,” I said, quietly enough so that John couldn’t hear me.
Corey just nodded. “Man, I hate spiders,” he said.
“Then you guys should stick with me,” Jake said. “I’m not afraid. We can u
se them as target practice. It’ll be fun.”
“Fun,” I said, nodding. “Right.”
After a while we pulled up to a low building that looked like it could be some sort of factory. We drove out back, Matthew getting out and motioning to Jake. “Come on, hotshot,” he called. “Let’s go check the building for muggers.”
John came into the back and started organizing our supplies. “We’re bringing it all in,” he said. “We might just be here for a couple hours, but I want the van cleaned out.”
Jake and Matthew came back a few minutes later. “Clear,” Jake said.
John handed me my backpack as we went into the building. It was one level, concrete, with large, dusty boxes piled on one side. “Let me guess — you own the building?” I asked, raising my eyebrow at him.
“Alas, I do not,” John said, ushering me inside. “It belongs to an associate of Cruz. And it may not be totally safe. He knows we’re coming, and I don’t know him or trust him. Cruz does, but Cruz doesn’t always have the best judgment.”
“So what are you worried about?” I asked.
“You know, the usual,” John said and shrugged. He checked his phone. “Getting shot at. Someone firebombing the building. Getting surrounded and having a shootout.”
“Oh,” I said, and resigned myself to the cold sweat forming in my armpits.
“I have to go meet my connection,” he said. “I have to get our weapons. I should only be gone for an hour. Can you stay here with the guys?”
“Who’s going with you? I asked. I didn’t want him out there, alone, meeting some shady arms dealer.
“I’m fine. I’m going to leave Matthew here with you,” he said. “It’ll be fine. We’ve used this guy before. He’s reliable. He likes money more than he likes anything else, so he loves us.”