by Nicole Falls
“Really? Is that all you g—” she started but was quickly shut up when I captured her lips once again.
This kiss was decidedly less chaste as my tongue took advantage of catching her off guard with her mouth open. Our tongues dueled for dominance as the kiss increased in intensity, Juniper trying desperately to take the lead, but I wasn’t allowing it. My hands, which were cradling her face, moved down her body, to land at her hips, shifting her, settling her atop my lap. She murmured her approval at the shift in position, lacing her hands together behind my neck and pushing herself closer to me. I detangled our mouths, licking a trail from her ear the hollow of her throat, which caused her to throw her head back as I suckled her neck, sure to leave behind bruises as evidence of my presence on her body.
Running my tongue along her collarbone caused Juniper to let out a shuddering moan as she began a slow grind in my lap. I chuckled at her response before bringing our mouths back together in another torrid kiss, only breaking when the necessity of breathing reared its ugly head. At the conclusion of the kiss, Juniper rested her forehead on my shoulder, slumping into my embrace. We sat there for a few moments in silence, breathing falling in tandem.
“Well, shit. Now that? Is what I call a great first kiss,” she quipped.
I couldn’t do anything but laugh in response. We sat cocooned in silence for a few moments more until Juniper lifted her head from my shoulder and leaned in to kiss me again. She clearly hadn’t had her fill as she pressed her lips against mine in slow succession, each press lingering longer than the previous contact. I captured her lower lip between my teeth sucking it into my mouth, trying to take over the kiss, but Juniper pulled back with a frown.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Are you a control freak? Do you always need to have the upper hand?”
“That came out of nowhere.”
She shook her head, “It came from right now. I’m settled atop your lap, clearly enjoying myself, kissing you, but instead of just going with the flow, you just had to take over.”
I laughed, but quickly sobered once I realized she wasn’t joking at all. And my laughter deepened the crease in her forehead that appeared when she frowned.
“You’re serious right now? You’re in my lap, grinding on my hard dick, my hands are all over your ass, and I’m supposed to be a passive participant?”
“What happened to your caution? Moving based on my level of comfort? Letting me take the lead?”
“Are you uncomfortable right now?”
“Well, no, but…”
I shook my head, taking a moment to think about my words before speaking. I needed to clear, but inoffensive.
“Sweetheart, I’m not sure what kinda b level niggas you’ve been with before, but that’s not how I roll. There’s no power struggle here, love, just two people enjoying themselves…or at least I thought we were both enjoying ourselves. If there’s something I’m doing that you don’t like or that you don’t want, I know you have no problem opening that pretty ass mouth and telling me, so what is this really about?”
Juniper remained silent, trying to shift off of my lap, “Maybe I should go. I should probably go.”
I held her firmly in place, hands braced on her hips, “No running.”
“I’m not running. I’d just like to go now.”
“I’m not into holding anyone hostage, so if that’s what you wish…”
I released my hold, allowing her to slide off of my lap. She stood in front of me, motionless and staring for a moment before moving back toward the apartment to gather her things. I followed right behind her, not saying anything, completely confused by what had shifted, but knowing I didn’t want to say shit else that could possibly ruin the chances of seeing her again. I was no sucka ass nigga, but I also wasn’t stupid. We’d reached some sort of impasse that I was sure we would work out whenever Juniper sorted out whatever was going on in her head. For now, I just followed her through the house and down the stairs, to walk her to her car.
We reached her car and I put her bag in the trunk before escorting her to the driver side door and opening it for her.
“Have a good night, sweetheart,” I said, “Maybe next time we do this, I’ll call you up and ask you out…you know the proper way.”
We both laughed at that and I expected her to get in the car and continue on her merry little way, but Juniper turned toward me suddenly. She stared at me for a couple seconds before speaking.
“I…had a good time tonight, Quincy.”
“Me too, Juniper,” I replied.
She laughed, “No for real, I did have a really good time tonight.”
I grabbed her hand, moving us out of the street to rest against the passenger side of her cat.
“So, what happened? How did we go from the start of my daily fantasies for the past week to…” I waved a hand around, “Whatever this awkward shit is now?”
“You’re really direct,” Juniper hedged.
“I am. Lived life too long in ambiguity with too many folks. Can’t operate that way and keep my sanity. Clear and direct is the only way to be ‘round these parts. So, are you done side stepping my question yet, or…?”
“Why couldn’t you just go with the flow?”
“I thought we were flowing rather nicely, sweetheart.”
Juniper groaned and threw her head back. I laughed instantly picking up what was going on here now. She was the control freak that she accused me of being. And because I didn’t fall back and let her have her way she was frustrated. It was cute, her inability to just vocalize that.
“So, since we were flowing why couldn’t you just sit back and say, ‘ok sweetheart, do ya thang!’?”
“Because while you were doing your thang, my thang made it virtual impossible to just sit still, but be clear,” I said, stepping in, placing an arm on either side of her and leaning down to speak directly into her ear, “If you wanna be in control like Janet, you’re gonna have to tie me down. The only way I’m not taking over is if I’m literally restrained.”
At the end of that statement, I delivered a lingering kiss to her neck, right below her ear before attempting to move out of her space. Juniper had different ideas though, threading her fingers behind my neck, joining our mouths in a kiss, controlling the tempo with soft nibbles and suckling my lips. My hands dropped from beside her head to her ass, sandwiching her between the car and my quickly reappearing hardness. Juniper groaned, deepening the kiss. I used the grip on her ass to lift her from the ground, bringing her legs to wrap around my waist, forgetting where we were and everything else that was not Juniper and her insistent grinding against my erection and soul-robbing kisses.
Once again, the necessity of breathing caused us to move away from each other and that separation allowed clarity to sink in and I let Juniper’s legs back down to the ground. Her breathing was labored, eyes closed, lips parted as she took in breath after breath. After about ten seconds, she grabbed my hand leading me back toward my place.
“Ok, yeah. I’m definitely fucking you tonight.”
I had decided that I was going to fuck Quincy tonight around thirty minutes after our initial misunderstanding. After I quickly got over being creeped out, I realized his intentions were good and we started vibing, he seemed like a nice guy. And that print in his grey sweats that he’d changed into after we decided to hang out and order some food sealed the deal. Honestly, it had been too long since I’d had some and I was like a cat in heat. And I dropped hints all night, which he chose to ignore until I gave him no further chances of ignoring. But then…then it all went to shit. Because I got on my Juju, ruler of all that she surveys shit, and Quincy? He definitely didn’t seem like the type of man who would eventually become subservient, I was now coming to find out. Nevertheless, that didn’t quell my desire to have this man embedded so deeply within my walls that I forgot where he ended, and I began. So, I got over myself, strapped my boots up, and invited myself back into his space to get what I didn�
��t know I came for but was more than ready to receive.
After my declaration, he said nothing, just allowed me to lead him back into his place. We crossed the threshold for his apartment, but I stopped short after closing the door. I knew that his bedroom was near the back of the space, because I’d seen two additional doors when I used the restroom earlier, but I wasn’t sure which of the two doors led to where I wanted to go.
“Lead the way, sir,” I said, all bravado on full display despite feeling…not nervous, but also very nervous.
I’d initiated sex on many occasions and in many circumstances after spending far less time with a man that Quincy and I had spent tonight, but something about this seemed…different. I couldn’t put a finger on what was different or why it was, but I just felt it in my gut. And my gut had never let me down, but my gut was also not finna stop me from letting Q get in my guts, so there was also that. Instead of leading me to the bedroom, Quincy redirected our steps toward the couch in his living room.
“Are you sure about this? I want you to be sure about this because a few short minutes ago…”
I dropped my head on a groan. Because while my pussy was definitely on board, my brain wasn’t one hundred percent sure.
“Can I say something without it going to a weird place?”
“It’ll only get weird if you take it there,” Quincy replied, smirking.
“Aight, so boom. I…this…,” I started before taking a second to collect my thoughts so that I could clearly express my thoughts. The only problem was everything in my head was a jumble and I had no concise way to expressing what I was thinking.
And Quincy, is an incredibly brilliant display of patience, just sat waiting for me to gather my thoughts.
“Does this feel different to you? Like…I don’t know, I can’t really explain it, but all of this? The random train encounter. You being the one to work on my car at Holt’s? Tonight? It almost feels like it’s divinely orchestrated, you know? What are the odds of us having never seen each other before as much as we’ve both moved around this town, but we have enough mutual followers on Instagram of all places to connect us? Well tonight was wholly by your design, but all of those other things? Seemed…fated?” Juniper didn’t wait for an answer as she continued, “I just don’t want to fall into bed with you tonight and possibly ruin something that could be really special.”
Quincy let out a low chuckle.
“That’s silly, right? It is. I’m buggin. Which way’s your bedroom?” I said, grabbing his hand to try and pull him up from the couch.
He countered by dragging me down to sit on his lap before speaking.
“It’s not silly. Something about this does feel different. I don’t know what it is either, but I’m glad you stopped us from making a mistake. Can’t have you not respecting me after I gave you my virginity tonight,” Quincy said, with a completely straight face.
“Oh my god, can you be serious? I’m for real,” I said, burrowing my head into his shoulder.
His flip response should have pissed me off, but I was more embarrassed than anything. God, even my reactions to things that would have normally sent me running the other way normally were being affected by this man.
“Hey,” he said softly, causing me to pull back to be able to look him in the face again.
His face bore the ghost of a smile, as if he’d been trying to curtail it before he spoke.
“Yeah?”
“I was serious, you know. About this feeling different? But I’m leaning into it, trying something new. The worst that can happen is another heartbreak, but honestly? I feel it’s safe with you and I know you’re safe with me—so if you can get on board with that? We’ll take things as they come. That sound good to you?”
I nodded once before verbally responding, “Yeah. That sounds good to me.”
“All right, now that that’s settled,” Quincy said, tapping my thigh so I’d raise up,” Let’s get you outta here and home safely.”
“You don’t wanna…”
“Hell yeah I do, but you’re not ready yet, sweetheart. You’ll know when it’s time. C’mon.”
And with that he led me back out of his house and into my car. I pulled off, looking in the rear view to see Quincy still standing near the curb I’d pulled away from. I tooted my horn once before making a left at the stop sign to continue on my journey home. That seemed to jolt him as he threw a hand up in salute toward my direction, then turned back to go into his house.
I sat lounging on the couch in the den listlessly watching an SVU marathon, as per my usual Sunday routine. If no one else requested my time, I had a long-standing date with the USA network and their themed crime drama marathons. The house was quiet, so I assumed Noelle was off somewhere with Jay, which was fine by me. I could use a bit of quiet contemplative time. I’d been burning the candle at both ends this week, weaving MYOP workshops between web current roster of web design clients.
We normally conducted the bulk of our MYOP workshops on the weekend, with the occasional Friday appointment, but for some reason Wednesday was becoming an increasingly more popular booking day as well. Joey was talking about adding some hump day specials to capitalize on this growth, but I honestly just didn’t even have the brain bandwidth to think about what all that would entail. We were growing more rapidly than anticipated and I wanted to talk to Joey about possibly bringing in a couple more facilitators to help alleviate some of the strain from our schedules. There were a couple of folks who were in class with us when we were getting our certs that I thought would be dope additions to our movement. I whipped out my phone to make a note to bring this back up when we met for lunch tomorrow.
I’d damn near fallen asleep after a few episodes when I heard my name being yelled from the front foyer. It was Noelle and she was hella turnt for some reason, so I dragged myself from reclining on the couch to see what it was she wanted.
“Hey Junie B—what is wrong with you?” Noelle asked, her brow furrowed.
“Damn, I look bad?”
“Not bad, but you definitely have a lil sour look on your face. What’s going on, you good babygirl?”
“Not really,” I said, surprising myself because that was definitely not what I was prepared to say in my brain.
Noelle grabbed my hand and dragged me back into the den. She shut off the TV before speaking.
“What’s going on?”
“I…don’t know, honestly, No. I mean…life is good right? Both of my businesses are flourishing. All of you guys are in good health and good spirits. I’m still fine as fuck, but something…just is off. I’m all off kilter and I can’t call it.”
“So, I didn’t wanna say it, but you’ve been kind of…off since your whole Instagram shot shooting incident. And, sis, if your confidence is knocked because some nigga didn’t respond to you hollering at him…”
“Wow, NoNo, tell me how you really feel, then.”
“Nooooo,” Noelle practically yelled, “I didn’t mean it like that! I’m just saying, I’m used to you letting ish like this roll off. You don’t even take a lot of downtime after breakups, but one rebuff has you shook?”
“First of all, there was no rebuff. I actually spent the day with him yesterday?”
Noelle gasped, raised a brow, and said, “So we holding out on each other now?”
“So was I supposed to break into brudda’s last night, interrupt your post-coital glow to tell you about how I almost got piped but messed it up by being weird?”
Noelle held up a hand, “Wait. A. Minute. Back it up, gymshoe. Start from the beginning.”
I ran down the circumstances to me ending up at Quincy’s place and all of the rest of the night, sparing no detail because I knew that if no one else kept it funky with me, NoNo would. I finished my story on a sigh and Noelle said nothing. We sat in silence for a good two or three minutes before she had any reaction. And that reaction was to burst into a high-pitched shrieking laugh, which annoyed the hell out of me.
�
��Not sure anything I said was funny but go off.”
“Awwwww Junie, don’t be that way,” Noelle said, reaching out to embrace me.
I deftly avoided her outstretched arms and rolled my eyes.
“Just…forget it. Nevermind. What had you so crunk when you stepped in?”
“Nah-uhn babygirl. Don’t even think about shutting down. You know what the problem is right?”
“No. I don’t. You do?!”
“Yeah, baby. You like him.”
“That’s no secret, No. I said he was a cool dude and we had a good time,” I replied, exasperated.
“Noooo, baby. You like him. And you’re freaking out because you think it’s strange or too soon or you’re in denial of your feelings for him. But maybe that IG caption wasn’t just in jest. He makes you feel something. And I ain’t talking about in ya loins, I’m talking about that man moving your foundation and you’re fucked up behind it because you’ve never felt this way. Dassit!” Noelle said and spread her hands in a ta-da fashion.
“I…you…shit. Shit! Is that…shit!”
I sank down into the couch groaning.
“That’s a good thing, Junie B. Buck up,” Noelle said, waving her hands in my face, “Liking someone has its perks.”
She kept moving her hands wildly and finally the light caught onto and almost blinded me with its misdirection of sunrays but caused me to focus on its cause. I grabbed Noelle’s hand and screamed. The gorgeous ring that Jay had showed me just a few short days ago now sat beautifully perched on the fourth finger of her left hand. I marveled over how beautifully the delicately filigreed band rested upon Noelle’s slender finger.
“Oh my god you have to tell me everything. Forget about my mess! How’d he do it? When’d he do it? I can’t believe he did it without telling me!”
“You knew this was happening?”