Shaking his head he walked back over to the warriors in the bailey and rejoined Kendrix until their morning session was over.
After the warriors were dismissed, Broderick reappeared at his wife’s side; much of her dark red hair had escaped her braid framing her glowing face. Her green eyes were dazzling as she linked hands with him. Her skin was flushed from the workout; she looked like she had just conquered a foe. From the stables they both heard Isobel’s sweet little voice call out, “Aunt Elisabeth, wait for me!”
Stopping, Elisabeth and Broderick turned around to see little Isobel dashing across the snow-covered courtyard, waving her wooden sword in the air as she ran towards her beloved Aunt and Uncle.
***
Kneeling down, Elisabeth caught Isobel in her arms and swung her up to her hip and plucked the wooden sword out of the lass’s grubby hands, “My love, we must never run with our blade as so, we must carry it like this as we run so we do not injure ourselves,” showing Isobel how to hold her sword properly she handed it back to her and kissed her temple before sitting her back down.
Nestling between her and Broderick, Isobel slipped her wooden sword into her belt and grabbed both of their hands as Kendrix walked towards them.
Feeling Isobel squeezed her hand, Elisabeth looked down at the rosy-cheeked lass, “Yes my dear?” She asked.
“Uncle Broderick said that maybe you would teach me the bow, that you were…,” looking back at her tall uncle, “what was the word Uncle?” she asked, trying to remember.
Winking at Elisabeth, Broderick lowered his gaze at his little niece, “I said she was spectacular at shooting the long bow my love, but your Da had to agree to the lessons.”
“Begorra, I forgot to ask Da. Hold on,” Dropping their hands she turned around and ran towards her father, jumping up into his arms and whispering into his ear.
From a distance both Broderick and Elisabeth watched in delight as little Isobel asked permission to be taught the bow. Feeling Broderick’s hand slip over her hip and pull her closer, she gently elbowed him and looked up into his emerald green eyes, “Spectacular eh? My husband compliments me highly. I am pleased.” Smiling up at her warrior.
“You are very deserving of my praise, your skill is flawless Elisabeth. Duncan trained you perfectly. I can find no flaw in your movements or technique. Your modified motions to avoid stronger opponent’s powerful blows is quite impressive my love, and we are all aware there is no archer in the land who can best your skill,” kissing the top of her head and watching Kendrix and Isobel walk up, he whispered into her ear so only she could year, “You can start by teaching my niece, and then eventually our children.”
Elisabeth’s heart did a flip. Children. She hadn’t thought of having children in years. The thought tore at her heart. She froze, and worse of all, Broderick noticed.
Before her, she heard Kendrix speak, his voice drew her back to reality.
“Isobel is asking for permission to learn the bow, seems like she’s been watching Aunt Elisabeth and Uncle Broderick said he’d make her a bow, what is a father to do?”
“Da, you know Aunt Elisabeth is the best, and Uncle Broderick makes the best longbows,” she said as she rolled her eyes and put her hand on her hip. Broderick had to pretend to cough in order to cover his laughter.
Elisabeth quickly cleared the chaos in her heart, she smiled at Isobel, “How about we go find Old Rhona in the kitchens and go in search of some lunch my love, your Da and Uncle Broderick can join us and we can discuss it further.” Taking Isobel’s small hand, she let Broderick’s comment about children go, the thought simply broke her heart. Allowing herself to become distracted by the bustling five year old beside her, she turned her attention fully to Isobel, leaving the men behind.
***
Watching Elisabeth skip hand in hand with Isobel, Broderick looked over at his brother and shook his head, “I dinnae understand it Kendrix, she’s a flawless warrior, acts like mother to Isobel, yet when I just mentioned her having our own children the woman about fainted.” Confusing wrought amongst his face.
Raising a brow Kendrix replied in a humorous tone, “and that confuses you?”
Walking towards the castle Broderick nodded, “Aye Brother.”
Slapping Broderick on the shoulder and bringing him closer, “Ye have a lot to learn about women big brother. Think about it Broderick, if she’s with child she cannae fight against Kincaid. All these weeks she’s been focused on revenge for her family, on healing and seeing justice dealt to Kincaid and his men. If she finds herself carrying your babe, she’ll be forced to stay behind.”
Closing his eyes he tilted his head back, now he understood, it was probably one of the reasons why she never pursued a marriage in the past, “She’s never mentioned it, nor have we been preventing making a child, very much the opposite.”
Taking the stone stairs two at a time the brothers entered the warm hall as Kendrix offered, “I’m guessing that conversation will come up soon, seems to me she might have just realized it herself. Give her time to sort out her emotions Brother; I don’t think she’s the type of woman to choose her sword over babes in her arms.”
The brothers entered the kitchen to find Isobel and Elisabeth washing their hands as Rhona floated around the kitchen setting out plates for them to eat, they preferred the small kitchen over the large hall for small family meals. The smell of savory foods filled the air, their stomachs were empty and there was nothing better than a warm meal prepared by Rhona. The group sat down and asked Rhona to join them, the five of them sat in the warm kitchen and Isobel told Rhona all about what had happened today.
After an entertaining lunch, it had been decided that Elisabeth would indeed teach Isobel, and Broderick would make Isobel’s new bow as soon as possible.
Watching her throughout lunch, he could tell she was still shaken up from earlier, whispering into his wife’s ear after they finished lunch, “Would you like to go for a ride in the woods lass, just you and I?” Under the table he ran his hand up her thigh as he gave her ear a soft kiss.
Nodding, “Oh I’d love that Broderick,” she whispered.
Broderick excused them as he linked hands with his wife. Waving goodbye, they walked out of the kitchens, in search of the stables. Broderick and Elisabeth walked through the warm castle and back out the door towards the stable; he thought it best to keep his mouth shut as he could tell his wife’s mind was racing. He learned long ago from his father, to wait until the lady told you what was on her mind versus trying to guess. Arriving at the busy stables, both of their stallions were saddled and waiting for them. Tossing her up into her saddle he walked over to his tall horse and easily pulled himself up, “Where would you like to go my love?”
Adjusting the black sable fur over her shoulders she looked over at Broderick, “Surprise me, I’ve only been out of these walls twice. A nice brisk ride will do me good, I feel out of sorts.”
Nodding, they walked their horses to the drawbridge, which lowered quickly as the guards saw their laird approaching. Behind them, as always the wolfhounds followed. Once the drawbridge was down, both Broderick and Elisabeth spurred their horses into a gallop and flew into the frozen forest that surrounded the castle. They rode for over an hour before Broderick finally slowed his mount and eventually brought his horse to a stop, turning to his wife, “Tell me what is wrong Elisabeth, I know you well enough to know something is upsetting you.”
Bringing her horse next to his, he watched as she pulled off her leather gloves and sit them on her lap as she stretched her fingers, reluctantly she looked into his eyes, “I’m fine Broderick.” Her voice was shaky.
Shaking his head and taking the reins from her hands, “Don’t lie to me woman, tell me what is upsetting you!” He demanded, the tension in his voice crackled.
“I do not have to tell you everything that is on my mind simply because you demand it!” Swiping her leather reins back out of his hands she slipped on her gloves and glared her husband, �
�It isn’t lying if I do not want to talk about it Broderick, you might be laird, you might be my husband, but if I do not want to discuss something you cannae make me!”
Alone in the frozen woods, Broderick and Elisabeth sat upon their tall stallions and glared at each other as the snow began to lightly fall. Broderick reached over and ran his hand over her jaw, “I dinnae mean to demand lass, I worry about you. Ever since I mentioned children you turned white. If you do not wish to speak about it, I will honor your wishes, but please know I am here whenever you care to share your worries with me.”
Lifting her hand up, she placed it over his and leaned into his warm hand with her face, nodding she whispered, “Thank you Broderick.”
“Let’s ride home love, the weather is starting to turn for the worse to the north,” he said as he winked at her and allowed her to lead them back home. He wanted her to learn his lands like the back of her hand so she would never get lost. His land was the most remote and vast of all the clans in the Highlands; it was easy to get turned around.
Thundering through the woods, Elisabeth navigated the trails effortlessly as she brought them back to the castle, behind her Broderick and the hounds trailed closely. The storm clouds were brewing high in the mountains; the sky had turned a menacing gray as they sped over the drawbridge. The massive wooden bridge was raised as soon as they cleared it.
***
Riding into the stable Elisabeth slipped off her horse before Broderick could assist her, her thoughts were troubling her greatly. She had been grateful she led so Broderick could not see her face. The entire ride she battled her internal demons over the thought of a child.
Tossing her reins to the stable hand, she started to walk to the castle without even waiting for her husband. The entire ride she struggled with her heart, in one hand she vowed to avenge her fallen family and clan, in the other hand she had a duty to her husband, the man she desperately loved. Being with child would prevent her from riding next to Broderick when they headed south after the thaw. Elisabeth felt placed between her deceased family, and the family she never thought she would have.
It tore her in two; years ago she tossed aside the idea of a family, of children. She had pushed the idea of marriage and children aside when she chose to fight with her father and brother. A breeding woman would never be allowed to ride with the army.
She had been so swept up in recovering, in falling in love with Broderick she forgot the way of life. Sex with him meant the very real possibility she would conceive. She very well could be carrying Broderick’s child now, the thought of a child nearly brought her to tears. She had always wanted to be a mother, yet duty and honor and her choice to ride next to her brother had made that an unreal possibility. Now, she was married. She could be, or would be with child soon enough. How could she seek revenge for her fallen family and clan if she carried Broderick’s child?
Rubbing her palms up her face, she flicked her braid over her shoulder as she walked towards the castle, the wolfhounds following closely at her booted feet.
In the blowing wind she could hear Broderick call for her, refusing to look back she bit her lip and continued walking. She was holding on by a thread, she couldn’t look or talk to Broderick right now without completely losing her composure. Holding herself together the best she could as she passed her people, she quickened her pace. She needed solitude.
The large doors of the castle opened before her as she walked in and nodded to the guards, quickly passing them she skirted the kitchens and made her way up the winding staircase to her solar. With every stair she climbed, the tears of reality sunk in. Throwing the solar door wide she allowed the dogs to follow her in before shutting the massive wooden door behind her.
For the first time since she had arrived, she threw the lock to her own door. Unchaining Broderick’s sable fur from her shoulders she tossed it on her chair. Completely in a daze she watched the fire dance in the hearth as she pulled out her weapons and sat them down on the beautifully carved table next to the bed.
Running her hand over her abdomen she closed her eyes and sank into the leather chair before the fire, her tears could no longer be contained. Safe behind her door, she let all of her emotions come to the surface in her quiet room.
She thought of her parents, and Duncan, her slain clan members and all of the innocent women and children who had died at Kincaid’s order. How could she honor her vow to avenge their lives if she was forbidden to ride with Broderick and his army?
If she weren’t already with child, it would only be a matter to time before it would happen. The thaw was only a few months away; preparations were already being taken for their campaign south to Douglas lands for war.
She was too slim to hide a pregnancy for too long; she knew doing so would be tantamount to lying to Broderick. If he ever found out she intentionally concealed that information from him so she could join the army as they waged war on Kincaid, he’d never trust her again.
She loved her husband far too much to lie to him, even if it meant to avenge her family. She would have to find a different way, a way where she could have it all, a family and revenge. She had no other choice; she refused to allow Broderick to ride without her when they descended upon Kincaid’s lands in a few short months. She knew denying her husband his rights would never work, she craved his attention. Pushing him away would sever the tight knit bond she cherished so much.
She sat in her chair staring at the dancing flames; she had no idea how long she had been sitting there when her dogs captured her attention. Conn and Isla perked up their heads and looked towards the locked door when she heard the soft knock, followed by Isobel’s sweet voice, “Aunt Elisabeth, would you like to come help make my bow with Uncle Broderick in the armory?”
Standing up, she quickly dried off her lingering tears as she walked over to the door and opened it, kneeling down so she could look into Isobel’s face, “Aunt Elisabeth isn’t feeling well my love, how about you and Uncle start without me,” she stated as she tucked a curl behind the young lass’s ear that had escaped.
The little blonde flung her arms around Elisabeth’s neck and squeezed her hard, “You are sad, aren’t you Aunt Elisabeth?”
Closing her eyes and embracing the small child, “Aye Isobel, my heart hurts,” kissing the top of her golden blonde head as she sighed. Tears rolled down her face as she held the sweet child, she couldn’t help but imagine what her daughter or sons would look like some day. The innocent embrace of this sweet child nearly broke her, gently kissing the top of Isobel’s head, she stood and wiped off her tears and directed Isobel back downstairs, “Go see Uncle Broderick my sweet; he’ll make you a wonderful new bow. I’ll see you at dinner tonight my dear, have fun with Uncle Broderick, and make sure he lets you help!” Smiling down at Isobel she gently turned the five year old back down the stairs. “Take the hounds with you my love, they’ll keep you better company than me.”
Isobel simply smiled and nodded her head once. Tapping the side of her leg to call for the hounds, she blew Elisabeth a kiss and started back towards the armory, Conn and Isla following directly behind her.
Closing the door gently behind them, Elisabeth walked back into her solar and spied her bed. Exhausted, she slowly walked over to the elaborately carved bed and crawled in. Pulling the covers over her head she tucked into a ball and wrapped her arms around herself. Closing her eyes she sighed sadly as another wave of emotions rolled over her yet again. She wished she could speak to her family once again she longed to hug them. She knew she would never be able to live with herself if justice was not brought down upon Kincaid’s head. She had to find a way.
***
On the other side of the vast castle, Broderick was in the armory waiting for his niece. He had seen a crack in Elisabeth’s façade as they rode back into the castle grounds today; she was on the verge of tears. When he saw her quickly dismount and toss her reins over to the stable hand, he slowed his horse and let her flee. It was clear she needed solitude
. On the ride he gained some perspective that gave him peace, Elisabeth always told him what was on her mind. He knew how forthright Elisabeth had always been; this was something that had shaken her to her core.
Since she had been here, her answers flowed freely whenever he asked her a question. This was the first time she had chosen to not answer him. It bothered him greatly. Yet, he understood. Often in his years of controlling the vast majority of the Highlands he too had come across issues that demanded lengthy deliberation.
Instead of running after his emotional wife, he sent Isobel upstairs after a while in search of her. He knew how much Elisabeth loved her. Isobel had been flourishing under Elisabeth’s tutelage. Broderick knew whatever she was going through was because he mentioned a child, was she unable to have children? Would she choose her blade over a babe? Sitting down at the design table in the armory he ran his hands through his hair, placing his elbows on the large wooden table.
She had been magnificent this morning; he had seen the most battle-hardened warrior in his clan pay Elisabeth respect during training. He had seen so many sides of her, the lover, the wife, the warrior and the nurturer. Today had been exhausting. He hated how fighting with her felt. His entire world felt askew. He did not like the tension; he hated how he could not fix her problems if he didn’t know them. He felt shut out.
Agreeing to allow her to have her space, for now, he inspected the piece of fir he had selected for little Isobel’s bow. He thought of his parents, he had seen many times when his father would give his mother a wide berth; their marriage was built on love and respect, exactly what he wanted with his new bride. His mother had taught her sons how to be good men, how to treat woman with respect, especially Broderick, as it had not came as naturally as it did for Kendrix.
Fiddling with the long strip of wood in his hands, he sighed deeply as he thought of his parents. He knew if his mother were alive she’d have plenty of wisdom to bestow upon him regarding his new wife, and how to handle every situation. Without her here, he had to figure it out on his own. He cared far too much for Elisabeth to allow her such distress. He would find a way to make it right.
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