“But you never did,” she said in wonder. “Not even once. Not even after the things I said, the things I did.”
Ryan moved closer. Close enough that his familiar scent washed over her. His eyes turned down at the corners, his forehead furrowed.
“Of course I didn’t. You don’t deserve that, Abby. No one does.”
“I know. Or rather, I’m beginning to know.” Her gaze flickered off him. “I’ve been talking to my friend—she’s a psychologist.”
“Good for you.”
“It’s really hard. But it’s been good too. I see so many things that I didn’t see before.”
His eyes scrolled over her face, coming to rest on hers. “What, Abby? What do you see?”
She looked deep into his eyes. He was closer now. His hands holding hers, his thumbs fanning back and forth, making her insides hum.
“I see you loving me like I was never loved before. I see you trying to reason with me. I see you wanting to hold me.” Her voice was thick with tears. She blinked against the sting in her eyes and felt a tear trickle down her face. “And I see myself pushing you away. I see myself shrugging from your touch. I see myself walking out the door and never looking back.” She bit her lip to stop its trembling.
He brushed away the tears. “Don’t cry, Red.”
“I came to say I’m sorry.” Her voice broke. “I’m sorry for the pain I’ve caused. I’m sorry you got stuck holding my baggage. I’m sorry it took me so long to see the truth.”
He raised her hands and kissed the tender flesh of her palms. “I’m not letting you take all the blame. I’m sorry too. I worked too much. I took you for granted. I let you go when I should’ve fought for you. I should’ve been your hero. I’ll always regret that.”
She reached deep inside, down past the pain, where a thread of courage cautiously unfurled. She grabbed hold of it like a lifeline.
“Would you—” She swallowed hard. Took a deep breath. “Is it too late for a second chance? To try again? I know it’s a lot to ask. I’m still complicated, more so than I even knew, and I’ve just begun to scratch the surface. There might be more stuff, there probably is. I don’t know how that’s going to affect me and how it might change me, and I don’t blame you if—”
His hands cupped her face gently, pressing his lips to hers, cutting off her words. All thought left her head as she responded to him.
He drew her closer, deepening the kiss. A low hum started inside, sending a tingly heat throughout her body. Her arms came around him, her fingers diving into the softness of his hair.
It was pure joy to be back in his arms, pressed against the solid wall of his chest, enveloped in his protective embrace. Did he really want her? The thrill of that thought would never grow old. If he really did give her another chance, she wouldn’t blow it this time. She swore she wouldn’t. She’d fight through all the pain, all the baggage, and make it work. It was worth it. He was worth it.
Moments later he pulled back, breaking the kiss. Their eyes locked together, and he studied her with an intensity that unraveled her from the inside out.
His fingers tangled in the hair at her nape, squeezing gently. “I love you,” he whispered, his voice thick. “I never stopped.”
She let the words seep down into all the tight spaces of her heart. Let herself believe them. Accept them. “I love you too, Ryan. So much.”
“I want you back in my life. I want to put that ring back on your finger for real. I want you to be mine again, forever this time. I want to fill this big empty house with our love and, someday soon, with our children.”
“I want that too.”
His lips claimed hers again, less gently this time. There was strength and determination and possession in the kiss. She absorbed all of it, every second.
He kissed her until her breaths were ragged, and her heart felt too big for her chest. Then he held her in his arms. Her head rested against his heart. It was beating as fast as hers.
Her eyes fell on the front door, and she remembered her car at the curb, filled with all her belongings. She thought of the moving truck, scheduled to load up and ship out tomorrow.
“What about my job?”
“We’ll figure it out.” His voice rumbled in her ear. “I’m not letting you go again, Abby. Don’t even try.”
“I’m not going anywhere, not without you.”
She thought of the life she’d planned in St. Paul. The job. The apartment. Months ago she’d been so excited at the thought. Now it all felt so flat. She knew Ryan would go if she asked. But she couldn’t see him there. Couldn’t see them there. This was where they belonged. Here . . . in their dream house, in Chapel Springs, surrounded by the love of his family.
She leaned away, needing to see him. “I don’t think the new job is for me after all. St. Paul just doesn’t feel right anymore.”
Twin commas formed between his brows. “Take some time. Think it over. You worked hard for it.”
Abby shook her head, certainty filling her with confidence. “I don’t need to think about it. This is the right thing for me, for us.”
His thumbs brushed her cheeks, erasing the last remnants of her tears. He planted a soft kiss on her lips, and she felt it all the way to her toes.
“What are you going to tell your boss?” he asked when he drew away.
She smiled, looking into his eyes and seeing forever there. “I’ll tell him I’m going home.”
The corners of his lips turned up, softening his whole face.
She could look at that face for the rest of her life. In fact, that’s exactly what she intended to do.
“I’ve missed you more than you know,” he said. “Welcome home, Red.”
Epilogue
ABBY COULDN’T BELIEVE THE DAY HAD FINALLY ARRIVED. Her heart beat with excitement as she and Ryan stood at the altar of the small chapel facing Pastor Adams, Gillian at her side. The sweet smell of her fragrant bouquet mingled with Ryan’s woodsy scent. The warmth of his arm brushed hers, and she sneaked a peek at him.
He looked so handsome in his black suit, his hair combed carefully into place. He stared at the pastor intently, as if memorizing every word.
They’d planned on eloping, but somehow word had spread through the family, and the McKinleys were having none of it. Mama Jo and the girls had helped her pick out her simple dress, a deep green wraparound. If the look in Ryan’s eyes when he’d seen her was any indication, they’d chosen well.
She’d gotten ready at PJ’s house, and Mama Jo had insisted on a family barbecue afterward to celebrate. The McKinleys were always up for a celebration, and Abby couldn’t think of a better reason than their reconciliation.
When the pastor instructed them to face each other, her eyes met Ryan’s. She couldn’t have looked away if she’d tried. A tendril of warmth curled through her at the love shining from his eyes. Had he looked at her this way the first time? She couldn’t remember. Her mind had been too foggy with worry and delusions.
She saw it clearly now, though. Not only the love, but the promise, the determination that would see them through whatever may come.
Abby repeated the vows, infusing every word with strength and certainty. She held her emotions in check until Ryan’s eyes turned glassy, and then her voice became thick with unshed tears.
A moment later he placed the ring on her finger. “With this ring I thee wed.” The husky tone of his voice was nearly her undoing.
She swallowed hard, looking at the man who held her heart, and knowing it was safe in his keeping. She vowed she would do the same in return.
As Pastor Adams presented them as husband and wife, a smile stretched across her lips, and she couldn’t help but notice her husband’s matching one. Joy bloomed inside. She didn’t think it was possible to be any happier than she was at this moment.
He gently took hold of her face and leaned closer. “I love you, Abby,” he whispered, for her ears only.
“I love you too.”
He bru
shed her lips slowly, gently. So soft it couldn’t have stirred every cell to life, and yet it did. She placed her hands on the starchy lapel of his suit. The kiss was over too soon, and he was drawing away with a mischievous grin.
“To be continued,” he whispered.
The next hour passed in a flurry of well-wishes and impromptu photographs. Pastor Adams joked good-heartedly about being out of McKinleys to marry. They’d kept him busy lately, that was for sure.
She said good-bye to Gillian, who had to fly out for a conference, and gave her a big hug. Her friend had played an important role in her reunion with Ryan. Gillian was thrilled, not only for their reconciliation, but that Abby was moving only an hour and a half away.
The family changed clothes and met up at the farmhouse ready for a backyard barbecue, McKinley style. Ryan’s dad and grandpa were at the grill, and Ryan and Abby joined his siblings on the court.
Abby caught the basketball that Ryan chucked her way and spun toward the basket. She put up the shot. The ball bounced off the rim and into the net, swishing into Madison’s waiting arms.
“Nice shot, Abby,” she said.
Ryan gave her a double high five, held onto her hands, and gave her a peck on the lips. “Well done, Mrs. McKinley.”
She soaked in the warmth in his eyes. “Thank you, sir.”
He came back for seconds that turned into thirds. Abby melted against him.
“Hey, don’t mean to interrupt your make-out session,” PJ said, “but there’s a game going on here.”
“Come and get it,” Grandpa called from across the yard.
And just like that the court cleared, except for Ryan and Abby.
“Couldn’t have planned that better myself,” he said, leaning down to nuzzle her nose.
She set her hand on his chest, taking a moment to admire the ring on her finger. It had been there exactly two hours.
“Are you sure you don’t want to go away for the night? We could go up to Brown County—the leaves are at their peak. Or we could go to downtown Louisville.”
Abby shook her head. “I just want to go home with you.”
“The last month has been hard. I’ll be so glad to have you in our house.” His voice turned husky. “In our bed.”
A shiver of anticipation ran through her. “Me too.”
The last month had been hard. Abby had stayed in Indy, way too far away. Initially, Frank hadn’t been happy about her change in plans. He’d groused at her for a while, but he’d come around eventually. Especially when he’d caught Lewis raking in money under the table. He’d fired the man, and Abby had felt compelled to stay until he found a replacement.
Then he’d asked if she’d be willing to run an agency out of Louisville instead of St. Paul. The new place was scheduled to open in November in a storefront downtown.
“Hey, you two,” Mama Jo called. “Food’s getting cold.”
“Coming.” Ryan took Abby’s hand and led her toward the picnic table. Fall had descended in all its glory. The canopy of reds and golds shimmered overhead, and the earthy scent of fall hung in the air. In the distance cornfields rolled across the landscape, waiting for the coming harvest.
Little Mia approached the table, Boo dangling from her pudgy arms. “Mine,” she said.
Daniel pulled a pitiful looking Boo from the girl’s arms and set her on the ground. “Come on, Peanut. Let’s go wash up.”
“Me too, Daddy!” Ava said, running as fast as her little legs would carry her, her brown pigtails flapping.
“Start without us,” Daniel said, taking each girl’s hand.
Madison made room for Abby and Ryan on the bench. “You’ll have to bring Boo over to play with Lulu and Rigsby sometime.”
“Poor little thing would get trampled,” Ryan said.
“They’re very well behaved, I’ll have you know.”
“I need to get her in to see you soon,” Abby said. “She’s due for her shots.”
“Call me Monday, and I’ll make sure and get her in next week.”
It took a few more minutes to get the steaks off the grill and everyone settled. Daniel and the twins made it back in time for prayer.
They quieted, joining hands, then Thomas’s voice rang out in the stillness of the evening. “Heavenly Father, we thank You for Your many blessings. For Your bountiful provision, for Your abundant grace, and Your unmerited mercy. We thank You, today especially, for family. Those born of us and those who’ve come into our family through the bond of love. We ask Your blessing on today’s union. And we ask Your blessing on this food. In Christ’s name. Amen.”
There was a resounding echo of “Amens.” Ryan squeezed Abby’s hand, giving her a look that made her heart flop over.
Chaos ensued, food being passed and multiple conversations flying around the table. Next to her, Beckett scooped a spoonful of mashed potatoes onto Madison’s plate. He gave her a covert wink, drawing a smile from her.
Across the table Thomas patted Joanne’s hand, laughing at something Grandpa had said. She gave her husband a playful scowl.
Next to them PJ and Cole, fellow newlyweds, were off in their own world. Cole fed her a bite of his sweet potato casserole, and PJ closed her eyes, probably listing the ingredients by taste. Cole took the opportunity to peck her on the lips, no doubt distracting her from her task.
Down the row, Daniel settled Ava in the high chair and put a spoonful of corn into her red plastic bowl. She grasped the spoon in her chubby hand and scooped up a bite, looking very proud of herself. Next to him, Jade wiped Mia’s mouth and tweaked her on the nose.
Ryan nudged Abby with his shoulder. “You’re awfully quiet.”
“Just taking it all in.”
“It’s a lot to take in.”
She spared him a smile. “You love every minute.”
His eyes swept across the table, a smile tilting his lips. “They have their moments.” He looked back at her, studying her until a blush heated her cheeks.
“What?”
“I hope you feel welcomed. I want you to feel like you belong, because you do.”
“They’ve been great. They’re really trying hard, all of them.”
“So are you. I can tell. Have I told you how proud I am of you?”
She’d continued talking with Gillian the past month, and she’d come a long way. She’d already set up her first appointment with a counselor here in Chapel Springs, the same one Cole had been seeing.
“Thanks. That means a lot.”
Abby’s eyes flitted back to Mia as the toddler gave Daniel a toothy, corn-filled grin. Abby couldn’t help but smile.
Ryan followed her gaze. “She’s pretty cute, isn’t she?”
“They’re both adorable.”
Abby felt a tug low in her belly as she watched the girls, something new she’d never felt before. Longing. She imagined Ryan’s baby growing in her belly, under her heart. She imagined a baby boy with her husband’s warm brown eyes, who’d grow up and mimic the way he stood, the way he talked, the way he laughed. She couldn’t imagine anything she’d like more.
Her eyes found Ryan’s. “I know we just got married. And I still have a lot of work to do, but . . .”
“The moment you’re ready, you just say the word.”
Something bloomed inside. Something light and pleasant that filled her with happiness. Contentment. It seemed surreal, sitting here in this backyard again with everything so different than it was before. So much better, the promise of their future stretching far into the distance. She felt so blessed.
“Hey, you two,” PJ said. “Earth to the newlyweds . . . we’re waiting on the corn.”
“You’re one to talk.” Ryan grabbed the bowl and passed it to his sister, his eyes never leaving Abby.
“I do think we should wait a bit,” Abby said, not missing a beat. “Settle in and enjoy each other for a while. I’m just surprised. I didn’t think I’d be ready anytime soon, but right now I can’t imagine anything more wonderful.”
<
br /> “I can’t wait to spend all my tomorrows with you, Mrs. McKinley.”
“Right back at you, husband.”
By the time they turned their attention to the food on their plates, it had grown cold. But Abby didn’t care. The warmth in her heart was all she noticed as she fell right back into the McKinley family as easily as day turned into dusk.
Reading Group Guide
1. Who was your favorite character and why?
2. Ryan felt God leading him to win Abby back, but balked when it didn’t go according to plan. Discuss a time when you’ve had something similar happen.
3. From the beginning of their relationship Abby feared losing Ryan, as if she were waiting for the other shoe to drop. How can negative attitudes play into our relationships?
4. After Abby lost the baby, she felt Ryan resented her. Discuss the reasons she felt that way. Have you ever had a past hurt impose upon a present situation, causing you to read it wrong?
5. At some point Ryan had to give Abby over to God and just pray. He said, “Waiting makes me feel so helpless.” Can you identify? Discuss a time when waiting was the best option for you.
6. Abby was shocked by the realization that she provoked Ryan during the marriage because she felt she deserved to be mistreated. Discuss the ways past wounds can impose upon our present circumstances.
7. We tend to generate the results in life that we think, deep down, that we deserve. How have you seen this played out in your life and in those around you?
8. Abby’s anger and bitterness toward God started her down a path she was never meant to walk. Has this ever happened to you? To someone you love?
9. Discuss the ways in which the grandfather clock is a metaphor for Abby and Ryan’s marriage.
10. How did you feel about reading a reconciliation story? Do you feel Abby and Ryan’s issues were adequately addressed prior to their reconciliation? What obstacles do you foresee in their future?
Acknowledgments
Married 'til Monday Page 24