by Donna Flynn
I entered the dining room on crutches and moved awkwardly toward the table. My father sat in his usual place, paper in hand, cup of coffee before him, watching me approach sadly. I hated that look, and the rift between us ate at my heart as much as Aidan’s absence, but I was determined to make him see he had been wrong to send him away. I knew my father snuck into my room at night just to see me. I felt his strong presence at my side and his upset every time he was near, but I wasn’t ready to forgive him so I acted as if I was asleep.
To end both of our suffering, I pushed my plate away after a few bites and with a lot of effort pushed myself to my feet. As if on cue, Beth grabbed my bag and crutches as Paul lifted me into his arms and carried me outside, where my mother’s car was waiting. It was easier to get me in and out of her BMW so he had decided to take it over his truck, for which I was grateful. I couldn’t imagine how trying it would be everyday to get in and out of that behemoth. He sat me in the seat and pulled the seatbelt around me before closing the door. Beth slid into the back seat, and he got in to the driver’s side, started the engine, and began to pull away. It was then I noticed a large black SUV behind us and looked at Paul, but he ignored my questioning gaze and drove away, followed by what I was confident were Aidan’s protectors.
Once we got to school, it became clear it was going to be difficult to get around on crutches. I was tired just getting from the car to the front door of the school, so Paul scooped me up and carried me the rest of the way to my locker. Jess, Josh, Chad, and Chris were there waiting to welcome me back, which brought tears to my eyes.
“I’m so glad you are back,” Jess gushed, hugging me awkwardly due to the crutches in the way.
“Yeah, and we want to help you, so do not be too stubborn to ask,” Chris threw in, adding a hug of his own.
Chad watched with sorrowful eyes but said nothing, and I knew he was still feeling guilty for something he had no control over.
“Hi Chad, how are you?” I asked.
“I’m good; it’s you I’m worried about.” He looked at the crutches with a sad smile.
“Chad, it was an accident. I don’t blame you, and you need to stop blaming yourself,” I told him.
“Really?” he asked, looking hopeful.
“Really,” I said with a smile.
“We need to go or we’ll be late,” Paul said beside me.
As I started down the hall on the crutches, I could tell I was going to make everyone late for class, so I prodded them to go on without me. “Why don’t you all go ahead; I’ll meet you there?”
“Nonsense,” Chad said, scooping me up in his arms. Josh grabbed the crutches from my hands, and I smiled thankfully at him.
“Chad, this is really not necessary,” I assured him.
“No problem, you don’t weigh anything,” he told me, moving swiftly toward my first class.
The rest of the day Chad insisted on carrying me to each class, despite my assurances I could walk on the crutches. It was a sweet and endearing gesture, but it worried me he was staking a claim on me, whether intentional or not, before the rest of the school. At the end of the day, I realized my fears were grounded.
Chad carried me out to the car and crouched down next to me as I finished buckling the seatbelt. He took my hand in his. “Do you think maybe I could come and visit you at home sometime?”
I wanted to tell him then and there that we were just friends, so he would understand how I was feeling and wouldn’t be hurt, but the words wouldn’t come.
“You are free to come by whenever you want,” Paul said, before I could formulate an answer.
“I will take you up on that,” Chad told him with a wide grin. “I’ll call you later,” he told me, letting go of my hand and shutting the door.
“Really, Paul?” I asked as he started the car.
“What?” he said with a shrug.
“Forget it,” I grumbled. I didn’t feel like arguing. I was tired and in far too much pain to engage with my brother, so I laid my head back in the seat and closed my eyes instead.
*****
I fell asleep that night with Aidan on my mind and dreamed we were sitting in the gazebo together, talking of all the things going on in my life since he had left. He smiled and told me how happy he was that I was once again back with my friends, before leaning in to kiss me. The coolness of his lips as they first touched mine created a tingle through my body that had nothing to do with the cold and everything with the male who held me in his arms. The kiss deepened, as did my desire for him, but as always he pulled back before things went too far. With a soft sigh, he smiled and reached up to pull a pink rose from the vine that hung from the gazebo, then tucked it behind my ear. “I miss you, Amado Uno,” he whispered as the image began to fade from my mind.
I woke up and smiled happily, turning on my pillow, when something pricked the side of my head, causing me to cry out. I moved my fingers through my hair, and they came away with a delicate pink rose between them, which looked like the one from my dream. I touched my finger to my lips, surprised by the coolness there, and knew, as impossible as it seemed, that my dream was no dream at all.
Chapter Nineteen
Over the next few weeks, life moved slowly and painstakingly forward. My cast was removed, much to my relief, and although still somewhat painful I was mobile, which allowed me some semblance of freedom again. Although always covertly guarded by my brother and Aidan’s protectors, whom I had come recognize easily, I found myself going out often to hang out with my friends after school and on weekends. Although I missed Aidan incredibly, I found myself able to laugh and live as I had before I recognized the intense feelings I had for him. The only fly in the ointment was the fact that my father and I were still not talking. Although I hadn’t forgiven him, I missed the easy relationship we had always shared.
My mother, in her usual loving and nurturing way, decided enough was enough and called me to the carpet to end the silence between my father and myself. “Sweetheart, I try to support you no matter what you do, but I can’t condone this silent feud between your father and you any longer. He is devastated by your silence, and you are just as unhappy.”
“He shouldn’t have sent Aidan away,” I cried out.
Her jaw clenched, never a good sign. “Young lady, that man cares for you more than anything in this world. He has been a better father then any human male I have ever met, and has given everything to see you happy. You might resent his decision, but I can’t believe you are holding a grudge for his trying to protect you.” She gave me that look all moms get when they are about to impart great wisdom and I sat down, waiting for it to come.
“Aidan would never hurt me,” I grumbled.
“I do not think he would either, at least not intentionally: but, honey, whether you believe it or not, you are too young to make decisions about the rest of your life. Right now, the only thing you should be worried about is being a teenager and having fun. You need to date other people and gain knowledge about males and how relationships work. That is why your father wanted you to have this time without Aidan. So you can make an informed decision about the life you could have as a human, if the time comes for you to make a choice between this life or one as a vampire.”
I knew she was right. And now that time had passed and things had calmed down, I realized the hateful way I acted towards my father was not right. I just hoped he would forgive me. “Alright, Mom, I’ll talk to Dad.”
I stood and she hugged me close, enveloping me in a cloud of vanilla. “I know this is hard for you, honey, but I know in the end if you decide you want Aidan, you two will be together. Just give it some time, alright?” I nodded and she turned me toward the doorway. “Now go and end your father’s torment, please.” She pushed me forward, and I found myself heading to the office to end the silent battle with the man who had raised me.
I poked my head in the doorway and my father rose from his desk, looking surprised, which told me my mother had not let him know we
had spoken. “Katie? Is everything okay?” he asked.
I stared at him, remembering all of the good times that had passed between us in my life, and became overwhelmed with emotion. Tears pricked my eyes and he moved quickly to my side, wearing a worried expression.
“I’m sorry, Dad. I know you are trying to protect me…” I paused, taking a deep breath. “I love you; please forgive me for behaving like a spoiled child.” I threw my arms around his neck and he hugged me close, like he had always done when I was upset.
“Honey, I love you and I promise: if you still feel the same for Aidan when you are eighteen I will drag him back here, although I have the feeling he will already be at the door waiting.” He smiled and brushed a lock of hair behind my ear.
“I know you are doing what you think is best, but I love him. I have for a long time, and I feel so empty when he is gone.”
His eye were filled with compassion and understanding as he stared down upon me. “I just want you to try it my way, okay? I need to be confident that you have lived enough to make a sound choice to be with Aidan. Being with him would mean eventually you would have to give up your human life and, although you live amongst vampires, I’m not sure you understand what that will entail. You cannot fathom what it is like to see your friends all die of old age; to have to pick up your life and move every few years because you never age, never change; and to see the world change for the good and the bad, as you stay exactly the same.” He hugged me, encircling me with his loving arms. “Go out with your friends, date a few human boys, live your life as you were meant to. Then you can make an informed decision.
I thought about what he had said. How would I feel when Jess and Chris died while I lived on, never changing, forever young? Could I bear moving and restarting my life over and over for the rest of eternity, never being able to form close friendships or put down roots? Being with Aidan would mean great sacrifice on my part, and I realized now that my father just wanted to be sure I understood what I would be giving up. I couldn’t fault him for that.
“I’ll try it your way, because I agree I do need to understand everything I would be giving up, but I know it will not change what I feel for Aidan. I will always love him, no matter what I decide.” I hugged him, savoring the strength and love his embrace offered, then went to my room. I was happy that I had made peace with my father, but anxious about the decision I would have to eventually make.
After a long soak in the bathtub to ease my worries, I put on my favorite pajamas and decided an early bedtime might go a long way to making me feel better. On my pillow as I got ready to go to bed was a single, long-stemmed, pink rose, nestled amongst the clean white linen. I picked it up and brought it to my nose, savoring its soft fragrance, before settling it into a vase and returning to my bed, smiling like an idiot.
*****
After fixing things with my father, my life took on a routine. I went to school, hung out with my friends, and went out often on dates with Chad, who, my family approved of whole- heartedly since he was so sweet and kind. Basically, not a threat. I, too, liked Chad, but more as a friend than a boyfriend. He was sweet and attentive but when he kissed me it was kind of awkward and uninspiring, nothing like when I kissed Aidan. I knew it was not a fair comparison, though. No one could ever make my heart race, or fill me with such joy just by his touch, the way Aidan did. I knew with all of my being he was the one I was meant to be with, and longed for the day we would be reunited for good. Until then I lived, experienced, and waited.
Chapter Twenty
Fall came, bringing with it cooler temperatures and chilly winds. My mother turned her attention to planning a party for Halloween. Paul was not happy about the logistical nightmare that meant for the security team, but since there had been no further problems he begrudgingly agreed.
Every day I did what they asked of me, but inside I was miserable without Aidan. I had changed so much and wished my family could see it, but they seemed ignorant of my transformation. I was no longer a little girl who needed them to guide me. That girl was gone and in her place was a confident young woman who knew where her life was heading and was determined to do whatever it took to make it happen. My decision had only been made easier by the time spent without Aidan by my side. I was only half a person without him. Don’t get me wrong: I could live and even have fun without him, but my life was better, fuller, and complete when he was in it, and I missed him terribly.
“Katie, is that alright with you?” my mother asked as we sat in the dining room planning the upcoming party.
“Sure, Mom, whatever you want,” I answered, unsure exactly what I was agreeing to.
“Honey, are you alright?” my father asked with concern.
No, I wasn’t. I was missing Aidan and wanted nothing more than to see him even if just for a short time, but I couldn’t tell him that. “Yeah, I’m just tired. Do you mind if I go to bed early?”
“Of course not,” he said.
I stood and stretched, bid them goodnight, and walked upstairs to my room. To my surprise, I was found I was very tired and as soon as my head hit the pillow, I fell asleep. True to course, my dreams kept me from sleeping soundly, and before too long I was wrapped up in another nightmare. This time I was running, trying desperately to find a place to hide. I knew the vampire was playing with me, toying with my emotions, building the fear within me. At any time he could overtake me and he knew it. Terror consumed me as I ran through the forest, screaming for help, begging for anyone to aid me, but no one came.
“You’re so tired; let me help you,” the vampire taunted appearing before me, pulling me roughly into his arms. His fangs protruded from his mouth, dripping with saliva. I screamed in terror, which only seemed to excite him and before I could blink, his mouth was at my neck caressing the skin there with his sharp and deadly fangs. “I can hear your blood pumping through your veins. It calls to me, beseeching me to drink.” His tongue moved slowly over a jagged cut made by a tree branch and he groaned. “You taste so sweet. I can’t see how Aidan has possibly resisted the temptation for so long.” He chuckled malevolently and bit down, tearing into my flesh ruthlessly, ignoring my cries as he gorged himself on my blood. I felt my limbs grow slack and my body droop in his arms as he indulged. And then nothing, as my eyes closed and the finality of death over came me.
“No,” I screamed jumping up from the bed, holding my throat, immediately checking for the tell-tale sign of bite marks or blood but to my relief finding nothing. Just a bad dream, I thought to myself as I got up and began getting ready for the day, but in the back of mind I feared it was something more. Something much, much darker.
*****
Paul and Beth were already in the dining room waiting for me a short time later, holding hands and looking so in love it made me long for Aidan.
“Beth and I are going costume-shopping today after school,” Paul said as I sat down. (A pleasant change from his usual “We’re late,” mantra.)
“Any ideas about what costumes you’re going to wear?” my father asked.
“Why don’t you come as Robin Hood and Maid Marian? You could wear tights, Paul, wouldn’t that be fun?” I said with a smirk. Dad and Beth laughed, but Paul shot me a look that said to knock it off.
“I don’t think so, and do not go giving Beth any ideas.” His warning fell on deaf ears, though, and I couldn’t resist teasing him some more.
“You know, Beth, he would make a great Romeo. Didn’t he wear tights, too?”
“You’re pushing it,” Paul growled, but he was smiling so I knew he was not too angry.
“You’re going to make us late, Paul,” I said as I grabbed my bag and walked out, leaving him and Beth to scramble after me. For one brief moment, everything felt like it had before my feelings for Aidan had surfaced, before I was old enough to understand what those feelings meant, before I was totally, completely, and utterly in love with my vampire.
*****
By the time Halloween came, even I was gear
ed up for the party. I got home from school that afternoon to find my home had been completely transformed from its former beauty to one of a more haunting visage. The outside was strewn with cobwebs, dark lighting, and ghostly forms dangling from nearby trees. Creepy coffins littered the yard, along with tombstones bearing funny sayings and fake skeletal remains poking up from under the earth. I walked into the front door to find the inside was dark and eerie, making it seem like a haunted house from a Hollywood movie. Cobwebs hung from every corner and chandelier, something scary lurked around every corner, and I knew once the party started there would be actors dressed in costume to help make everything even scarier. I had to admit my mother had done it again, and I went to my room to get out of her way and wait for the festivities to begin.
“Katie, it’s time for you to get ready,” my mother said a short time, later hanging a bag on my closet door and unzipping it as I sat on the bed. “Let’s go, honey. Your guests will be here soon.”
I undressed and she went to work transforming me for the party. I had no idea what costume she had chosen for me, but my legs were encased in iridescent green stockings, and a shimmery matching bodysuit was draped with pale-green and yellow material. She handed me a pair of matching slippers, which I dutifully slipped on. Then she fussed with my hair and makeup for a while, hemming and hawing as she went.
When she was done, she led me to the mirror for my first look at her creation, and I stared transfixed at the magic she had wrought. The fairy I saw in the mirror before me was magical, not at all like the childish Tinkerbell I knew, but a more adult version. My hair had been pulled up off my shoulders with tiny ringlets spiraling down my neck. Shimmery ribbons and shiny pearls had been strategically placed throughout my hair and they sparkled in the soft lighting as I moved my head. The bodysuit fit snug to my torso, and the soft material draped over it hung down in an almost zigzag pattern to my mid-thigh, making it an appropriate length for my age, but still kind of sexy. It was simply perfection and I loved it.