by Donna Flynn
“Now eat,” he commanded.
Beth had put a little of everything on the tray, but I decided to nibble on a cracker with some tea to start. It was hard to eat with everyone watching me, but after a few bites, I felt my appetite returning. I was nibbling a sandwich when my parents joined us, overjoyed to see me eating, but puzzled to see Aidan next to me.
“Are you feeling better?” my father asked him with concern.
“I’m recovering nicely, thank you,” Aidan, answered with a dark look, obviously not happy my father brought up his condition.
My father and Paul exchanged heated looks that worried me. I placed the sandwich down and pushed the tray away. “What’s going on?” I asked looking between them.
“Do not bother yourself with our problems, honey,” my father said.
Paul, on the other hand, didn’t seem to think it was something to hide. “He’s mad because I called Aidan.”
“I know you don’t want us to see each other, but I needed know he was okay.” Surely he was not that desperate to keep us apart that he would let me suffer.
“Of course I wanted you better, but Aidan needs to heal and I knew he would not rest if I told him how you were suffering.”
“He had to have known; he always knows when she is hurt or in danger,” Paul argued.
“Not when he is injured so badly and has shut down,” my father ground out from between clenched teeth, angrier than I had ever seen him, which was very telling.
He was obviously very concerned about Aidan’s injuries. I looked Aidan over closely, noticing for the first time that his eyes had large purple half-moons under them and that his skin was much paler than usual. He looked tired and weary, very unlike the Aidan I was familiar with, and I realized his injuries had to have been severe for him to still be in such a state.
His eyes met mine as he read my thoughts, and I cursed myself for not closing my mind to him. “I’m better. I am more concerned about you then myself,” he told me.
I probably wouldn’t have second-guessed his words, a year or two before, but now that I was older and slightly wiser, I knew he was lying to protect me from the truth. “What happened? Why aren’t you completely healed?”
“You do not need to worry yourself about anything but getting better,” Aidan insisted with a pained look.
I leaned closer, searching his face, but he refused to meet my gaze. I grabbed his arm and shoved the sleeve of his shirt upwards, gasping as I took in the mass of white puckered scars that laced his flesh.
“I’m fine,” he said, pulling his arm away and shoving his sleeves back down.
For the first time I noted then that his shoulders were slumped, as if it was too painful to sit up straight and I recalled how he had grunted when he had lifted me earlier. He refused to meet my gaze and instead stared down at the floor, keeping his mind closed to me, but with him so close and me out of my own funk, I could feel his pain wrap itself around me and knew he was definitely not alright.
“Show me the rest,” I whispered, needing to know what horror he had gone through.
“No!” he hissed, lifting his head his eyes pleading with me to drop it.
“Show me,” I demanded.
He stared blankly at me.
“Show me now!” I demanded again, unwilling to allow him to hide his pain any longer.
“Katie, stop,” my father said his voice hoarse with emotion.
“I am not a child, Dad. I am tired of you all hiding things from me!” I looked back to Aidan. “I need to know,” I insisted, knotting the sheets over me in my hands, pleading with my eyes for him to understand.
Aidan sighed and slowly took off his shirt. It seemed to take a lot of effort, and I could feel the agonizing pain each movement cost him. With his shirt he stood before me; he stood proud and tall despite the tremendous pain he was in both mentally and physically. I gasped, staring in horror at the huge jagged scars crossing his chest and stomach, wrapping up and over his shoulders. They were red and puckered, angry looking, and must have caused him great agony when inflicted. I shook my head, unable to comprehend how his body could still have such marks from an attack that had happened days before. It didn’t make sense. Vampires healed very quickly. I didn’t know much but I knew that. It would take a very significant injury to take so long to heal, and that meant the attack was worse than I had been lead to believe.
“We’ll just step outside,” my father said.
The room emptied except for Aidan and myself. I stared at his chest and felt the vomit rise in my throat. I felt physically ill as I imagined the nightmare he must have gone through. I couldn’t breathe, as my upset mixed with his pain and fear for me. I moved from the bed and stumbled to the bathroom, purging my body of everything I had just eaten, before collapsing on the cold tiled floor, my sobs filling the air.
“Katie, don’t do this to yourself,” Aidan whispered, pulling me onto his lap and wrapping me in his arms. “If it weren’t for your warnings I would be dead. Trust me, this is nothing; I will heal in time.”
“How could you keep this from me?” I whispered. “I had the right to know.”
He winced. “I didn’t want you to worry.”
“Worry,” I screeched. “You were worried about me being worried? Well, guess what, Aidan, I worried anyway. When I couldn’t feel you, or know what you were going through, my whole life became meaningless. I couldn’t think, couldn’t eat, didn’t want to live.”
“Don’t say that,” he bit out, his face filled with fear. “You must live, must carry on, no matter what happens to me.”
I shook my head. “I don’t think I could.”
“Then we are truly in a predicament,” he told me, kissing my forehead. “Do you think you’re ready to go back to bed?”
“Yeah. I need to brush my teeth first though.”
He helped me to my feet and waited at the door while I brushed my teeth. It was odd having him watch me doing something so personal, and yet it felt right to have him there with me. After I finished he lifted me into his arms, ignoring me when I argued that I could walk and did not want him to strain himself.
He just chuckled and shook his head. “The day I can’t pick you up, you’ll know I’m done for.” He carried me back to bed, tucked me under the covers, and then sat on the chair next to me holding my hand in his own, looking nervous.
“I can’t believe my parents hid this from me,” I told him.
“They tried to do what was best. No one could have anticipated that you would react this way. It is unheard of so early in a relationship with a vampire. Usually there has to be a blood exchange.”
I knew there had been, although not in the traditional sense. “Aidan, do you remember the night you kissed me for the first time?” He nodded. “I bit my lip and broke open the cut Scott’s ring had caused, and you kissed me.”
He got my point. “That wouldn’t have mattered. I tasted your blood that night but you didn’t taste mine,” he told me.
“But I did,” I told him.
“No, I would remember that,” he told me.
“When you clenched your hand your nails sliced into your palms.” His eyes widened as understanding dawned. “I kissed the wounds and your blood was on my lips when you kissed me.”
“It isn’t possible,” he whispered.
“I tasted the blood, Aidan, I felt it inside of me, and I knew it had somehow changed everything, although I didn’t understand it then,” I admitted my cheeks flushed with embarrassment.
He sat in silence, staring out of the window, his fists clenched and his face unreadable, but I could feel his disbelief and anger at himself for allowing it to happen.
“You could have lived a normal life if I hadn’t kissed you that night,” he said stonily. “This is all my fault.”
“Aidan, no one is to blame here. It would have happened anyway at some point.”
He looked at me with sorrow-filled eyes. “Yes, but you would have been older and ready to handl
e it.”
“Does it matter?” I asked him. “It happened and we can’t change it, so there is no point in beating yourself up over it.” I squeezed his hand and smiled reassuringly.
He ran his free hand through his hair and sighed. “I suppose, but I have the feeling your father isn’t going to feel the same way.”
“Don’t tell him.”
“You know I have to,” he said. “I respect him, and I won’t hide what I have done to make it easier on myself.” He sat back in the chair, wincing at the pain it caused.
“You shouldn’t have come,” I said guiltily.
“I knew if Paul had defied your father, things must be bad, and your health will always be more important to me than my own.”
I was so selfish I had never realized how often he gave of himself to appease me, but I knew now. “Yeah, well, your people depend on you; they cannot afford for anything to happen to you. You should have called, not flown here from your sickbed to comfort me.”
He smiled and kissed my hand. “I would fly to the ends of the earth just for a glimpse of you.”
I recalled all of the roses and notes he had left me and knew it was true. “Will you be leaving now?” I asked. It was hard to think of him going away again, but I vowed to myself I would be brave and not make a scene. It was clear he still needed to rest and recover.
“I will leave in the morning after I take you to school. I really need the earth and serenity of my homeland to heal properly. Now, I want your promise to me you will take better care of yourself.” He tucked a stray hair behind my ear and stroked my cheek.
“It was not something I could control,” I told him. “Somehow your injuries affected me. I felt like I couldn’t go on without knowing you were okay.”
“I know that, and no one blames you, but you must remember it would kill me if anything happened to you.” I nodded. “Now, promise me you will take care of yourself so I can go home and heal.”
“I promise,” I told him.
He leaned in and kissed me. A long, searing kiss that made my heart beat fast and my blood pound furiously in my veins. “You should sleep,” he murmured huskily against my lips.
I pulled back and smiled. “I want to spend this time with you. I have been sleeping for days.” My hand was in his large one, his fingers stroking mine, spreading warmth through me, and for that moment my life was perfect.
“How’s Orin?” he asked, ending the perfection.
“I don’t want to talk about him with you,” I told him, looking down on our hands joined together.
“I understand,” he said not bothering to hide the pain in his voice.
I lifted my gaze to his and gripped his hand. “No, I don’t think you do. When I am with Orin he makes me laugh, and he keeps me from dwelling on the fact that I miss you so much that my heart physically aches. He’s a distraction, albeit a willing one, and in the end, I know I’m going to hurt him and it is killing me.”
“I’m sorry. I hate our being separated too, but it’s the only way for now. I made your dad a promise and I intend to keep it. Just remember, I long to be with you too every minute of every day.” He kissed me and sighed when he pulled away. “I will fight to keep you as long as you will have me.”
“Aidan, it’s not a fight. I want you and Orin is aware of that.”
He frowned and moved so he was sitting on the bed next to me. “Trust me. He thinks he can change your mind.”
“Never,” I laid my head on his chest. “You’re stuck with me forever.”
“I won’t hold you to that, but someday if you choose to be with me, you may have to make that decision.” He lifted my chin and kissed me again, then stared deeply into my eyes. “Rest now,” he commanded.
I felt my eyes droop at his compulsion, but before I could I scold him I was fast asleep.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
I got ready for school quickly the next morning, eager to spend time with Aidan before I left, knowing it would be the last time I saw him until my eighteenth birthday.
He was waiting for me in the foyer, and I ran down the steps, throwing myself into his waiting arms.
“You’re here,” I whispered, as he hugged me to him.
“I promised I would take you to school and I will,” he chuckled. “Now eat your breakfast and we will go.”
“You’re not fooling me, you know.” He frowned. “You think I won’t make a scene in front of the entire school, that’s why you’re driving me in before you leave,” I teased as we walked to the dining room.
“That’s the plan,” he told me with a wink.
I looked to my father’s chair that sat empty and frowned. “Where’s Dad?” I asked as my mother walked in, carrying a plate for me.
“Oh, he had some things to see to,” she said, casting a meaningful glance at Aidan.
“You told him?” I whispered.
“He had the right to know,” he murmured, as he pulled out a chair for me.
My mother placed the plate of eggs and toast down in front of me, then proceeded to watch me as I ate. Normally I found it hard to eat when someone was watching, but I found I was famished and polished off the entire plate, regardless of my audience.
I took my time drinking my orange juice, wanting to stall for time but before too long Aidan remarked that it was getting late and rose from the table. He pulled my chair out and took my hand as I rose, and I smiled warmly, happier than I had been in a long time.
After a quick goodbye to my mother, I reached for my overloaded book bag, which he took immediately from my hands, grumbling about how many books I was forced to carry, before placing his arm around my waist and escorting me outside, where another beautiful black sports car was waiting for us.
“Nice car,” I told him as he helped me inside.
“I like her,” he said running his hand over the hood lovingly, making me envious of the shiny new vehicle.
“Just be careful with this one,” I cautioned, remembering his accident not so long ago.
“Cars are meant to go fast and it’s not like much could kill me,” he said with typical vampire arrogance.
“Still, for me, alright?” I pleaded knowing he wouldn’t deny me, which he didn’t.
He held my hand the entire ride to school, his fingers moving slowly over mine as he drove much slower than I knew he would if I hadn’t been in the car. I was deliriously happy and it would have been perfect, except that I knew as we drew closer to the school the time for his departure was closing in.
Sadness invaded my happy bubble as he pulled up outside of the brick and mortar building, and he looked at me with a knowing frown. “I will be back. Your birthday is only a few months away, and if you still feel the same for me then, we will be together.” He squeezed my hand reassuringly and leaned toward me. “Now, let’s say goodbye properly.” His lips met mine, gently parting them, his tongue slowly sweeping my mouth in a deep fiery kiss that made me realize he had been holding back on me. I sighed and he pulled away, staring over my shoulder with a grin at something behind me.
I turned and saw Orin leaning against his car watching us, his eyes filled with rage, and knew Aidan had not held back because we had an audience.
“Aidan! How could you? Orin will be devastated,” I cried out.
“He’ll get over it,” he said dismissively, before getting out and coming around to open my door.
“Would you?” I snarled, grabbing my bag, prepared to stomp off.
He grabbed my arm and pulled me back, wrapping his arms around me. “I have had to get over knowing other guys have been kissing you for some time. Let someone else deal with it today.” Guilt overtook me at once, but he rushed to reassure me. “I don’t want you to feel guilty. I am confident I will be the person you kiss for the rest of your life.” He brushed his finger over my bottom lip, staring down at me as if I was the most precious thing in the world. “I will miss you,” he whispered, pulling me against him and lowering his head to mine. “Dangerous,” h
e growled, kissing me passionately once more before he let me go. I stood, unable to speak, my body quivering like Jell-O as he got into the car. Before he drove away, he rolled down the window and grinned. “Oh, by the way, you looked stunning on Valentine’s night.” I gasped, shocked he had seen me that night, and he revved the engine then drove away.
When I could no longer see his car I turned away and walked into school, hating the ache in my heart his absence brought, and dreading the moment I ran into Orin. Thankfully, Jess was the one waiting at my locker and not Orin, so I got a momentary reprieve.
“I see Aidan has another new car,” she said, leaning against her locker with a grin that should have warned me about the third degree that was coming.
“Yeah,” I muttered, wondering what I was going to say to Orin when I saw him.
“Is he staying for awhile?”
“Who?” I asked.
“Duh, Aidan. Is he staying with your family for awhile?”
“No, he’s leaving now,” I mumbled, closing my locker, fighting back the tears that threatened.
“Oh.” She placed a finger to her lips looking thoughtful. “So where’s Orin?”
“I don’t know.” My patience was going south fast and my hands tightened on my books.
“Are you two fighting?”
“No, not really, it’s just…I can’t do this here, please,” I pleaded as the tears spilled over.
“Hey, don’t cry. Why don’t I come over after school where we can talk privately,” she said, handing me a tissue and looking apologetic for upsetting me.
“That would be great,” I answered, wiping away the tears. “It’s been forever since we just hung out.”
“I know, right?” she said with a chuckle. “I think we could both use a testosterone-free zone for a little while.”
If she only knew, I thought.
With my afternoon planned, I rushed off to my first class and took my seat just as the bell rang. I opened my book and a little slip of paper fell out on the desk written in Aidan’s neat script. “I miss you already. Aidan.” My heart clenched and my hand shook as I stared at his words, missing him more than ever.