He nods his head then takes a sip of his coffee. Carter’s earned his spot with Hazel, and she’s excited to have her daddy in her life. She has her relationship with Nate, and she has her relationship with Carter. They’re both very different but fit like little puzzle pieces into her life.
I always have the fear in the back of my mind. I guess you can say I’m waiting for the other shoe to fall. We’ve hit our bumps, don’t get me wrong, but how is it possible this has all transitioned so smoothly?
I feel like I’m living in a haunted house. At any second, somethings going to jump out at me and make everything I’ve placed so carefully together crumble.
Chapter 29
Octoberfest is a pretty big celebration in Willow Creek. All the businesses in town come together in the center and have tables full of what they sell and other fun things.
I love the way my tables come out this year. Hazel’s enjoyed helping me set up, especially since I let her try on some of the jewelry. She really is a girly girl.
“Mama, can you make me a necklace?” she asks looking at the chandelier necklace in her hands.
“Of course, I can. Maybe you can help me? I can grab some beads, and we can do it together?”
“Yay!” she cheers making me chuckle.
After placing the jewelry and some assorted swag with my business logo on them, I stand back in the street to check out our set up.
“I really think the hot pink canopy you chose dresses it up a bit. Don’t you think Hazel?”
“It’s pretty Mama.” She stands staring in awe.
A couple hours and several sales later, me and my baby are starting to melt in the heat. It may be fall, but Willow Creek doesn’t get the beautiful leaves and pumpkin flavored anything. It’s pretty nice year-round even though it's abnormally hot for this time of year.
“Little H, you’re looking a little sluggish,” Nate says when he arrives at our table carrying a paper bag.
“Nate, can you take me swimming?” she questions.
“I cannot, but I have brought reinforcements.” He hands Hazel a little-motorized fan, and she grabs it like its gold. She sighs in contentment when the breeze hits her face. You’d think from her dramatics that we were in the Sahara Desert.
“Thanks.” I lean over the table, meeting him halfway for a kiss.
“Anytime. I also figured you ladies were hungry.” He pulls out sandwiches and cold drinks.
“You’re the best. Hazel was just complaining about her tummy being hungry even though everyone’s been spoiling her with treats. I’ve been holding her off from grabbing a box of Mrs. Linder’s homemade fudge.”
“I want fudge!” Hazel yells.
“Eat your food, and I’ll get a big box for all of us.” I run my fingers through her hair and dig into my sandwich.
“Are you ready for the big game?” Nate questions.
“Oh yeah. I look forward to this all year long. Hazel’s been practicing her moves,” I laugh.
“Has she now? I still can’t believe they put us on separate teams. It has to be because I have the least seniority of all the business owners.”
“You should have set your roots here earlier. The candy shop has you beat by seven months,” I chuckle. “You’re just scared we’re going to whoop you. Not to mention you don’t have a mascot like Hazel here. She’s going to be our good luck charm.”
Every year after the vendors close down in town, there’s an annual softball game. It’s sponsored by the business owners in town and pretty much whoever wants to play can. We’ve been known to have more than one game to get everyone on a team to play. The whole town comes down to the field to cheer and eat the diner’s world-famous hot dogs. Okay, maybe they aren’t world famous, but they’re so damn good they should be.
“That must be it.” Nate winks at me.
“Daddy’s on our team,” Hazel states with a mouth full of food.
“Is he?” Nate looks at me pointedly. “I’m going to have a word with the mayor.”
“No, you won’t.” I roll my eyes and shake my head at his antics. Nate was all-state in high school, and I really wish he was on our team. It’s not just a friendly game, the players take it seriously. It gives you an entire year of bragging rights, and you do not want to be on the bad end of that. Last year, Hotdog Harry’s found a poster on their window every morning with suggestive phrases like Experience our wiener’s in your mouth. It was hilarious, and we still don’t know who was behind it. I do not want to find crude jokes on my windows every morning when I pull up to work. Although, I’d love to see how creative they get because how do you turn anything other than a pearl necklace into something suggestive?
Later in the afternoon after my table is all packed up, we head to the field to play some ball. I’m not the best softball player, I’ll be the first to admit that. I like to think I hold my own, meaning I play a mean center field. I rarely see any action.
“Swing batter, batter, batter,” Hazel yells cheering on Nate who’s up to bat. She’s having the time of her life waving her little pom poms, cheering on not just our team, but the other team as well.
“Hazel, that’s the other team,” Carter states.
“No, it’s Nate.”
“Oh, okay. I guess that makes it okay,” he snickers.
The games tied four-four. I’ve been struck out three times and Carter’s managed to get two of the four runs. I didn’t know he was a baseball player back in the day too. That’s probably what all the cool kids did where they all grew up. I get up from the bench in the dugout and start cheering on my man. Nate doesn’t disappoint when he hits the ball over the outfielder’s heads, almost hitting the back fence. Hazel goes crazy, and I join in. Our team begs for us to stop cheering for the opponent and that makes us yell louder. We even do a little victory dance for him.
It’s the sixth inning when Nate runs over to our dugout. “Babe,” he calls for me.
“Yeah?” I get up and walk out of the dugout.
“I just got a call. A pipe burst at the new house we’re building, and I have to go.”
“No! But its Octoberfest,” I whine.
“I know, but there could be a lot of damage. Believe me, I’d rather be here with you guys. Finding a plumber to come out today is gonna be near impossible, not to mention cost me a fucking fortune.”
“Okay. I’ll see you later?”
“I hope not too much later.” He leans in and kisses me causing the bleachers to start cheering. We pull apart laughing, and I smack his ass as he goes running away.
Once I’m in the dugout, Hazel asks where Nate’s going. “He has to go into work. He’ll be back later.”
“Okay.” Unfazed, she turns around and starts cheering on the local flower shop owner.
Finally, we’re in the last inning. Our last up at bat and I’m up. We’re down by two runs, and the bases are loaded. Could there be any more pressure on me?
“You’re up next Lex. Now listen to me, never take your eye off the ball.”
I look at Carter with a furrow in my brow. Why would I take my eye off the ball? How would I see it?
“Hazel give me a good luck kiss.” I bend down, and she kisses both of my cheeks. “I can already feel it working.” I wink at her then leave the dugout.
These helmets are always so heavy. I don’t get it. You have to run from base to base after you get a hit, yet they weigh you down with this monstrosity of a helmet. Next, I grab a bat and try to look legit by taking a few practice swings.
“Go, Mama!” Hazel yells, and I wish I had as much confidence in myself as she has in me. I’d nail it out of the park.
Okay, I can do this. Just choke something on the bat…screw it. Just bang the shit out of it Lex.
I stare down the pitcher, the local coffee shop barista, and dig my feet into the dirt. I try to get comfortable in my stance, then wind the bat up over my shoulder. The first ball comes straight down the middle.
“Strike!”
Jesus.
Could I have judged that one any worse? I thought it was going to be a ball. The second pitch is much of the same landing me my second strike.
The pitcher throws the third ball, and I see it coming down the middle again. I place all of my weight on my back leg, and with as much momentum as I can muster, I swing my bat. When it actually makes contact with the ball, it surprises the crap out of me. The ball flies into the air, towards the outfield.
My legs start moving and the next thing I know I’m darting off towards first base. My eyes track where the balls going, and I book it for second base when it flies between the right fielder’s legs. Everyone’s cheering for me to run and when I look back, I see they’re now just getting to the ball out near the fence.
I run towards third, and when the coach tells me to keep going, I don’t hesitate. This never happens to me, I’m going with it until my feet land firmly on home plate. My foot touches the base at the same time I hear the ball hit the back of the catcher’s mitt. I quickly look over to the umpire with bated breath.
“Safe!”
I start jumping up and down unable to believe that me, Lexi Kile, just won the annual softball game for my team. Carter and Hazel come running out of the dugout straight for me, and I scream, jumping up and down unable to contain myself.
“I never win anything,” I yell over the roar of the crowd when Carter gets close. He pulls me into his arms and lifts me off the ground. I can’t hold back the laughter when he starts swinging me around as my team chants my name. I’m on an incredible high until Carter stops spinning me and my eyes lock on my mothers.
She looks disappointed. She gestures towards the fact that Carter’s still holding me close to him and I realize if Nate were here I’d be in his arms, not Carter’s. I’m not sure this is really a big deal, but my mother’s disapproving eyes make me tap Carter’s shoulder to drop me.
“This is crazy Lex.” He holds me and Hazel close, then kisses my cheek.
“Thanks, I can’t believe it.” I nervously chuckle and grab Hazel to prop her up on my shoulders. I run around the bases taking a victory lap and my little girls eating up the attention.
My team demands to go out for victory drinks and who am I to turn them down as the self-proclaimed MVP? I don’t want to ask my mom to watch Hazel, but she’s my only option.
“Hey Mom, do you think you can watch her for a few hours, so I can get some celebratory beers with the team?” I ask her.
“No problem. Hazel, did you see mommy’s hit?”
“Yeah Mamaw, it was cool!”
“It certainly was.” She grabs Hazels hand and her bag I grabbed from the dugout. “Be careful,” she says to me, and I know she’s talking about Carter.
“Mom, it was harmless.”
“Maybe to you.”
I sigh and kiss my girl goodbye. My mom reads into things way too much.
Once I grab my things, I check my phone and see Nate left me a Voicemail. He explains the house is in worse shape than he thought and that he’ll be working pretty late tonight and that he’ll most likely see me in the morning. It sucks he missed my big hit, he would have been as excited as I was.
“Want to ride with me?” Carter comes up behind me making me jump.
I turn around and glare at him. “Don’t do that. But yes, thank you. I’d love a ride.”
***
The beers just keep coming. I guess hitting the game-winning run earns you a free night of drinks. I don’t usually have this many, and when I get up to use the bathroom, Carter catches me after I stumble.
“You okay Lexi?”
“Yeah, I have to pee.” I hear the slur in my voice and cringe. I’m a stereotypical hot mess.
“Let me walk you.” He grabs my arm and leads me towards the bathrooms.
Once inside, I do my business and set out to wash my hands. I’m thankful my mom called me earlier and said she was taking Hazel to sleepover at her house. I’m able to really enjoy being out tonight knowing she’s not sitting around bored at home.
I exit the bathroom and notice Carter with his hip propped against the wall waiting for me. He grabs my arm to guide me when I begin walking in the wrong direction.
“I think it’s time I take you home Lexi, your hammered.” We weave through the crowded bar back towards our table and teammates.
“Okay,” I agree knowing I’m definitely past my limit.
Carter grabs my purse and throws an arm around my shoulders. I lean into him for support and let him lead me to his car outside. Once inside, he buckles me in and kisses me on the cheek. What’s up with all these cheek kisses?
“Don’t do that.”
“Do what?” he questions genuinely confused.
“Kiss my cheek.”
“Believe me, it’s the better of the options.”
“What options?” I ask now the confused one.
“Other places that I can kiss that would probably get me smacked.”
“No kissing anywhere… ever.”
I think I hear him mumble “we’ll see about that,” but I can’t be sure.
I have this crazy need to bring up the past. I’m blaming it on all the drinks I’ve consumed. Bringing up stuff I’ve already said I’m over is dangerous for our relationship and all the progress we’ve made, but…beer.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Shoot.”
“Are you still against marriage?” Wow, that’s not even what I planned on asking, but it just popped out.
Carter’s head snaps towards me, and I can see the surprise in his eyes. He thinks on it for a second after turning his eyes back to the road and answers with, “No.”
Short, to the point and just like that, I see red. I don’t know why Carter’s declaration of being open to marriage makes me so angry, but it does.
“Seriously? You’re open to marriage now? Well damn, that would have made things a whole lot easier back when I got pregnant. Not that I would have married you. Actually, you didn’t want kids either so nothing would be different. Right?”
“It sounds like you wish things were different Lex.” He pulls into my driveway then cuts the engine. After he turns towards me, he looks into my eyes. “Am I right?”
“No, I’m happy with where I’m at. I love Nate, and I have Hazel.”
“That’s not what I asked. Do you wish that things were different, like me and you ended up together?”
“I’d be lying if I said I never thought about it. Hazel missed out on her father for three years, and I pined after someone I couldn’t have for far too long.”
“You pined after me?” he asks sounding shocked.
“Yes. I loved you, I wasn’t joking when I said that. Then I had a baby that reminded me of you every day. It’s like everywhere I turned there you were. It’s hard to get over someone when you can’t forget them.”
“I know your feeling those beers, so I’m going to take advantage and ask you a question and hope you don’t hold it against me tomorrow.” He wipes his hands on the fabric of his shorts then clenches the steering wheel between his fingers. “Are you over me?”
“No.” Comes out so fast my hand comes up and covers my mouth in shock. A smile lands on Carter’s mouth, and I don’t know how to backtrack from this.
“Wait, no. I am, I’m over you,” I say begging him to believe me.
“Okay, Lexi.” He gets out of the car and walks around to open my door.
“Listen, Carter, I’m over you, you caught me off guard with that question.”
Lies, everything I’m saying is lies. Until just now I thought I was truly over Carter. I think I am, in the romantical sense, I think.
“Listen, Carter, our relationship ended horribly. I had a constant reminder of you and our relationship I couldn’t get away from. I’m over you in the sense of wanting to be with you, but I’m not over you in the sense that I never got any closure.”
He looks a little hesitant but nods his head once and helps me out of his car. We start up the wal
kway, and I notice someone sitting on the stairs just outside the front door.
“Nate!” I yell and run from Carter jumping into my boyfriend’s arms. “You missed my big hit,” I whisper into his neck.
“I heard about it from a few of the locals. I’m so sorry I couldn’t be there.” He looks behind me towards Carter. “Thanks for getting her home, I’ve got her now.”
“Alright man, I’ll talk to you guys tomorrow.” Carter jumps back in his car and parks it across the street.
For a brief moment, I panic that Nate overheard me talking to Carter. Then I remember we were in the car and there’s no way he heard anything from the stairs.
Once we get in the house, I jump up on Nate and start planting tiny kisses on his neck.
“Damn baby, you smell like a brewery,” Nate laughs pulling me up higher, holding beneath my thighs.
“I had some beers to celebrate.” I shrug my shoulders and go back to loving on his neck.
“Some,” he chuckles. “Let’s get you up to bed.”
“But I’m not tired. I want to do dirty things to you.” I pout my lips.
“How about I let you sleep this off, and in the morning, if you’re feeling up to it, you can have your wicked way with me.”
A yawn escapes my mouth, and I find myself snuggling up close to Nate’s chest. “Mmmkay,” I mumble, and by the time we reach my bedroom I’m half-asleep in his arms.
He gently lays me in bed and pulls my baseball clothes from my body. Once we’re both under the covers, I plaster myself to Nate’s body for his warmth.
“Do you love me, Lex?” Nate questions and if I weren’t drunk, I’d read into that question and the tone he uses.
“I do, so much.” I kiss his cheek.
I fall asleep on the thought that I’ll show him exactly how much I love him in the morning.
Chapter 30
I roll over in bed and find the space where Nate usually occupies cold. Waking up next to him is the perfect way to start any morning, and I feel myself missing him even though he’s only been gone for a day. He had a work trip he couldn’t pass up to talk about his business and teach other smaller companies how to grow.
Fool Me Once Page 16